Common problems with 2006 bmw 750li
I may have OCD, but I’m not sure!
2023.03.25 02:09 alwaysfknworried I may have OCD, but I’m not sure!
Within the past two years I was diagnosed with anxiety, which was expected because it runs in my father’s side of the family. I’m 22 now, and I honestly feel like I may have OCD. The cause of my anxiety is specifically intrusive thoughts, (TRIGGER WARNING) things like “what if ____ did ______ to me as a child and that’s why I do ______” hearing sirens and thinking “what if i harmed someone and I just forgot” shaking on my couch for days because I thought I could be a serial killer in the making, or a p*dophile for having the most vile random thought, having my roommate hide all the pills in my house because I was afraid I would swallow the entire bottle even though I don’t want to. I’ve had thoughts like this since I was a child. I would see another child get throw up and refuse to eat because I thought I was going to get sick also, I wouldn’t want to be in the vicinity of anyone else that was sick because I was afraid of contracting a serious illness, causing me to develop a habit of washing my hands even when I don’t need to that has stuck to this day, along with problems like my outside clothes cannot touch any of my furniture or inside clothes, or they will immediately be dirty. I’m not sure about it because I don’t seem to have the compulsion aspect, or I don’t have it that I’m aware of? Usually what I do is scour the internet for answers, or avoid whatever it is that’s bothering me. I know no one can diagnose me unless they are a medical professional, but is this sort of thinking/behavior common for anxiety, or should I talk to my therapist about possibly having OCD?
submitted by
alwaysfknworried to
OCD [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 02:09 thePr0misedLAN Musings on my VSG Anniversary
Today marks a year for me. I've lost 160 lbs, which is 20 pounds more than I originally planned on and what the program predicted. My weight has been the same for the past 4 months, which is genuinely shocking for me considering my typical diet.
I really feel like I don't eat that well. Today I had about 2800 calories, which is probably 500 more than typical. I used to eat closer to 4000 calories before the surgery. (I'm built like a lineman). I'm not having any alcohol today, but I do about 50% of the time, which is what I did before the surgery (much less than before, I get tipsy very quick and also sober up pretty quick). I like to eat slider foods (crackers, popcorn, chips) but I do get my protein, vitamins, and water.
I had a followup with a program doc and they asked diet questions and I vaguely described the good things I do eat and a little of the bad. I'm pretty sure if I kept up eating like the program dictated I'd lose another 50 lbs, but I feel no need to be that skinny. Makes me question the typical goals of the program. I'm betting quite a few people eat poorly like I do but it's like the elephant in the room for bariatric outcomes.
Overall I feel like the program catered to the lowest common denominator. Which isn't necessarily a problem, I guess, but it can be annoying. For instance, the prohibition on fizzy drinks seems to be rooted in an attempt to prevent people from drinking their calories. An honorable goal, but lying to people about stretching their stomach out is not cool in my book. Just put the facts on the table. Lacroix isn't a problem unless it's uncomfortable for you. But they don't say that. The vitamin requirements were the same for RNY and VSG but a VSG has better vitamin absorption than other types. No differentiation.
Overall, I am incredibly happy I went with the surgery. Maybe in another year I'll look back on this post and laugh at how stupid I was as I gain 50 lbs back... 😬 I doubt it, but I'm open to being wrong.
submitted by
thePr0misedLAN to
gastricsleeve [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 02:00 vk6flab [OC] The Contester In Me...
So, I have a confession to make. I'm a contester. I'm not ashamed of this. While I'm in a confessing mood, I'll also mention that I've not participated in many contests in the past few years. This is not for the want of desire, but for the lack of motivation to fix things in my shack that are fundamentally broken.
On the weekend I participated in a local contest. I took part for six hours, got on-air and made noise, made about 30 contacts, had a ball. I wasn't playing to win, though I did use the opportunity to refresh and hone some of my rusty skills.
The next day I spent much too long converting my log into something that the contest organiser asked for. I also discovered that there was a duplicate entry in my log, not something which I'd expect with only so few contacts, but a reflection on the tool I was using to create my log.
I started writing down what I learnt from the experience, operating from my own shack, documenting what worked and what didn't.
I commented on several things relevant to me, but to give you a flavour, my operator position is terrible because I'm logging on my main computer and the radio is side-on when I'm facing the computer. The sun was shining directly into my eyes when facing the computer. Holding a microphone I didn't have hands-free, I still don't have an auto-keyer to save my voice, my foot pedal didn't work and my data interface was on loan to another amateur.
As I said, these things are specific to me.
Logging was worse.
It didn't quite bring me to tears, but as the contest went on, it became a problem. I started to write down what was wrong with the tool I was using with a view to submitting patches to fix it when I realised that it wasn't actually built as a contesting logging tool, so I stopped and instead started writing a new list, one that describes what a good contesting tool looks like. It builds on a decade of using different tools and participating in contests in all manner of different situations, from special portable event activations, through to the annual top-tier contests run from a purpose built contest station and everything in between.
So, what does the ideal contesting tool look like, for me?
It needs to be cross platform, as-in, I should be able to use it on whatever computer I have access to, my Linux workstation, a Macintosh Laptop, an Android phone or tablet and while I'm at it, Windows and iOS and I think it should be able to run on a Raspberry Pi. In other words, there shouldn't be a situation where you cannot run the tool because you have some random combination of operating system or CPU that the developer doesn't support.
It must be open source. By that I mean, the code should be available to the entire community. There are too many stories of great tools dying or being held hostage by individuals or small groups. The tool should continue to exist and be usable regardless of the participation of the original developer. Users should be able to fix things, add functionality, change themes, whatever.
You should be able to customise it because not every contest needs the same information. For example, the John Moyle Memorial Field Day, a contest run every year during March in Australia requires that VHF and UHF contacts record the maidenhead locator, a four or six character message that designates the location of the station. This is used to calculate distance between two stations and award points accordingly. Such a requirement isn't needed in most other contests.
Some contests are considered friendly contests, like the Remembrance Day contest in August. It's common to exchange your name, details about your station and have a chat. You'd be unpopular if you used that approach for the Oceania DX, the CQ World Wide or the CQ WPX contests. In other words, some fields are expected for some contests, but not for others.
The tool needs to be able to show if a contact is valid by whatever means the rules for a particular contest decide. It needs to automatically log the time, keep track of previous entries and know about the super check partial list to validate partial callsigns.
The user needs to be able to use either a keyboard or mouse, or both, to do all the common contesting data entry. No dependency on crazy keyboard shortcuts, no requirement to click the mouse to make an entry, in other words, the tool needs to be able to get out of the way of the contester.
I think it needs to have a plug-in system to accommodate different rules and it needs to be able to export data in whatever format the contest organiser expects.
You should be able to use it without needing to be connected to the internet during the contest, it should be easy to update and have the ability to keep a station log for all the contacts ever made.
It would be great if it could also import existing logs so you can start to consolidate older logs.
Having spent quite some time looking for such a tool and failing, I've come to the conclusion that there's only one thing for it, I'm going to have to write my own tool and it would be great if you could help by sharing your opinion on the matter.
At this point I'm looking for suggestions on what you think is needed for a great contesting tool. I realise that for some, pen and paper is sufficient, and I'm not trying to dissuade you from using that, I've used it myself on more than one occasion, rather, I'm asking if you can think of things that it should do out of the box, things that are basic functionality that you would like to see as part of the design.
You can find the project on my vk6flab GitHub page, comment on Reddit, or you can drop me an email,
[email protected].
Look forward to hearing from you.
I'm Onno VK6FLAB
TL;DR This is the transcript of the weekly 'Foundations of Amateur Radio' podcast - for other episodes, see
http://vk6flab.com/ submitted by
vk6flab to
amateurradio [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 01:54 Marvelhawkeye483 Need some help with dealing with a friend of mine
This is a bit of a cry for help and a venting post, so will appreciate any help here.
To start, I have 3 male friends/coworkers who I am very close to who are also gamers. I find myself really lucky as I have known them for over 4 years and we never had any moments where things were inappropriate, in fact they have been very good at calling out problems in gaming, toxic males and oversexualasation of female characters. Each of us have their own set of favourite games, and sometimes our tastes not always match, but we get on with it and treat others with respect. This post is about one of them, I will just call him James to make things easier. Not sure if it is relevant, but all of them are older then me but James is not the oldest.
Me and James have a lot of games in common. Both of us enjoy and occasionally are playing coop or talking about games we are excited about. James is very considerate about having diversity in games and having girl gamers and LGBTQ+ community to be treated fairly and equally, which is honestly great to see. However, recently, it feels like he is going a bit overboard.
Now let me explain what I mean. Occasionally when we talk about games I share some facts about games or studios especially if those are specific to my country. Like to take Metro games as example I was mentioning how English Voice over and subtitles have not been translated correctly in some parts and a lot of side content kinda goes "missing" because of it and have also mentioned some references that you might not be aware of if you are not from Slavic country. However after I have shared something with James, James immediately says that he will check with his friend (who is also his ex who has transitioned) as they are a part of Discord channel and will ask, so I am just like wtf why you need to ask your friend about something I have told you that I know because I am literally a native speaker and from the country? Like James is not only doing it to me, but to others too and we are all lost at how to react as it sounds absolutely ridiculous at some times. Like other friends was sharing tips how to play a game he has been playing for decades and got exactly the same answer?
Any idea how to address it without sounding like an asshole?
submitted by
Marvelhawkeye483 to
GirlGamers [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 01:49 Sudden_Share_3965 TRT for months and nothing has improved in my life (read it all)
First and foremost this is not a TRT diss just read it all.
I’m 23, got on TRT months ago, first 2 months were terrible for me mentally, after I upped my dose to 100mg split 50 mg twice a week started feeling better and felt motivated and and more energy.
The problem is the one thing that has not left me is my anxiety, it’s like no matter what my anxiety stops me from doing anything, from going outside to working out too hard because I’m afraid of something happening to me. I’m always anxious it just seems to overpower anything.
I understand that TRT is not a cure all but my T was always below normal and yes there could’ve been improvements before hopping on but I’m mainly speaking on the anxiety portion of it ruling my life no matter what I seem to do. I want to solve my anxiety problems so I can move on with my life.
My anxiety has literally kept me inside and just afraid to do things for years now and I think getting on T is what made me realize I really need to get my shit together, and I’m wondering if I should start taking an SSRI or something because I’m at my tipping point.
Can anybody advise me on what I should do and if it’s a common thing for people on TRT to be on those kinds of drugs because I’m losing all hope.
Tl;dr Started trt months ago in hopes of being able to overcome anxiety but anxiety lingers and stops me from being able to live a life. Always been a bit a hypochondriac, agoraphobic, obsessive individual and wondering if I should get on anxiety meds
submitted by
Sudden_Share_3965 to
Testosterone [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 01:39 kurahador Need help to fixing DS3 button-going-crazy problem
So...my ds3 suddenly hits with one of those common button problem. Looked up youtube for a fix and it sure seems easy enough.
But when I opened my ds3, it looks like this:
https://i.imgur.com/9U7xld9.jpg https://i.imgur.com/C82dWDR.jpg The inside is totally different than those shown on youtube. I did try implementing similar solution by putting some electrical tape to bump up the ribbon cable contact, but it doesn't seem to work.
https://i.imgur.com/oWpezrz.jpg Any idea?
And before you asked, yes this is an original controller as I got it from buying a new 12GB PS3+2 controllers years ago.
submitted by
kurahador to
PS3 [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 01:37 Major_Action_8307 Revolutionary Dealer Training Review-Online Poker Dealer School Taught By Professional Poker Dealer.
| https://dealer-training.com/?hop=mpjjint 🃏 Introducing the Revolutionary Professional Poker Dealing Course: Deal Your Way to Success 🃏 Picture this: you're at a poker table, the stakes are high, and the tension is palpable. The players are focused, their eyes scanning their opponents, searching for any sign of weakness. Amidst this electrifying atmosphere, the dealer is the calm, cool, and collected epicenter of the action. The dealer holds the key to the game, and with the Professional Poker Dealing Course, you too can be that essential cog in the poker machine. ❓ What is the product, and what problem does it solve? ❓ The Professional Poker Dealing Course is an online training program designed to teach aspiring poker dealers how to master the art of dealing poker games like a true pro. With the high costs and inconvenience of attending land-based poker dealing schools, this innovative course is a cost-effective and accessible solution for those looking to break into the world of professional poker dealing. 👥 Who is the product for, and what benefits will they get from using it? 👥 This course is for anyone who wants to become a skilled poker dealer, whether for a poker league, a casino, or even just for fun with friends. Not only will you learn how to deal poker professionally, but you'll also gain valuable insight into the game, improve your own poker skills, and potentially even earn some extra income. Click Here for Instant Access to the Professional Poker Dealing Course 🔑 What are the product's key features, and how do they work? 🔑 Taught by veteran Bellagio poker dealer Tami D., the Professional Poker Dealing Course offers comprehensive training in dealing popular games like Texas Hold'em, Omaha, and 7 Card Stud. Through a series of easy-to-follow, expertly crafted videos, you'll learn the techniques, etiquette, and strategies required to become a top-notch dealer. 🆚 How does the product compare to similar products on the market? 🆚 Unlike expensive, land-based poker dealing schools, our online course is not only more cost-effective but also offers the convenience of learning at your own pace, from the comfort of your home. Plus, you'll be learning from a pro with real-world experience at one of the most prestigious poker venues in the world - the Bellagio. 📈 What are the pros and cons of using the product? 📈 Pros: - Affordable and accessible
- Taught by a seasoned professional
- Learn at your own pace
- Improve your poker skills and knowledge
- Potential for earning extra income
Cons: - Requires self-discipline and motivation to complete the course
- May not offer as much hands-on practice as a land-based school
🙋♂️ Have you used the product yourself, and if so, what was your experience with it? 🙋♂️ As the co-founder of the Atlanta Poker Club and creator of Dealer Training, I can personally attest to the effectiveness of this course. Our dealers have become some of the best in the business, and it has set our club apart from the competition. 🗣️ What are other users saying about the product, and are there any common issues or complaints? 🗣️ Sarah, a satisfied course participant, shares her love for the gambling world and how the course has helped her earn extra income. The testimonials speak for themselves - people are thrilled with their newfound skills and the opportunities they've unlocked as a result. 💰 What is the product's price point, and is it a good value for the cost? 💰 The Professional Poker Dealing Course is a fraction of the cost of traditional land-based poker dealing schools. Considering the comprehensive training, expert instruction, and the potential for earnings, it is an excellent value for the cost. 🎁 Are there any special promotions or discounts currently available for the product? 🎁 While we cannot disclose specific promotions or discounts here, we encourage you to visit the website to discover any current offers or deals that may be available. Don't miss out on the opportunity to join the ranks of professional poker dealers at an even better price! 🔗 Time to Ace Your Poker Dealing Skills: Click the Link Below for Instant Access! 🔗 Now that you know all about the Professional Poker Dealing Course, it's time to take the plunge and start your journey towards becoming a pro dealer. Click the link below to gain instant access to the course and begin mastering the art of poker dealing today! Click Here for Instant Access to the Professional Poker Dealing Course submitted by Major_Action_8307 to realproductreviewz [link] [comments] |
2023.03.25 01:35 datavortex Connecting 011D Evo Distro Plate to Radiators
| I am currently in the middle of my first watercooling build and I have a quandry. I'm using all EK parts for my loop. In particular for this issue, I have an EK-Quantum Reflection² PC-O11D EVO D5 PWM D-RGB inside my Lian Li 011D Evo. I have it set up "chimney style", with an intake EK-Quantum Surface P360M on the bottom, and the same radiator on the top for exhaust. My problem is I can't figure out how to connect the distro plate to the radiators. Distro plate with a Quantum Torque Micro Rotary 90° and the bottom radiator with a Quantum Torque HDC 14 fitting which doesn't quite align. I seem to have a couple of problems: - The connections seem to be "off" by a few millimeters, with the radiator connections more toward the rear (where "rear" means the long end of the case, farthest from the large glass pane) compared to the designated connections on the distro plate. I thought getting a distro plate meant that I wouldn't have this kind of problem, but it seems like I do. I'm not sure if this is expected, the result of poor manufacturing tolerances, or what. It seems like perhaps I could solve this with a Quantum Torque Rotary Offset 3 fitting, but it seems like that might be a tight fit. Which brings me to...
- The distance here it very small, and I'm not sure the best way to bridge this gap. I think I read that others have done this sort of connection using fittings only and no tubing. If I were to use my EK Loop Hard Tube 14mm, it would be just a few millimeters in length, which seems particularly challenging. And I have absolutely no idea how I would screw all of this in given the 90° difference and lack of clearance, that seems impossible? I bought some EK-Quantum Torque Push-In Adapter M 14 fittings, which are listed as "Compatible distribution plates: EK-Quantum Reflection² Series", but they seem like they are too big to "push directly into the distro plate without screwing" as the EK website suggests. Even if they did I'm not sure how I would do it given the tight fit for the radiator.
This is confounding because I thought by sticking with EK and the Quantum Reflection² Series stuff designed for my case, and following EK's own loop configurator, that this stuff would just work. Anyone who has used this (fairly common, I think) setup, how did you solve this dilemma? Did you even encounter problem #1 at all? Did I make some obvious newbie error? Thanks for your suggestions. submitted by datavortex to EKWB [link] [comments] |
2023.03.25 01:28 KasElGatto [USA-NY] [H] PayPal, Dreamcast Console and Games Lot, Games for Switch, Wii U, Wii, Xbox, GB Manuals, SNES (X-Men, Mystical Ninja), Famicom (Dragon Quest 1-4), Super Famicom (Final Fight 2, Super SF II & Turbo, Goemon), [W]PayPal, CIB 3DS Games
[USA-NY] [H] PayPal, Dreamcast Console and Games Lot, Games for Switch, Wii U, Wii, Xbox, GB Manuals, SNES (X-Men, Mystical Ninja), Famicom (Dragon Quest 1-4), Super Famicom (Final Fight 2, Super SF II & Turbo, Goemon), [W]PayPal, CIB 3DS Games
https://imgur.com/a/Fr1yrNR https://imgur.com/a/4jRPr1X?s=sms Hi,
I am only selling through PayPal friends, family, trusted, etc… I have many confirmed transactions on here.
I’m happy to provide pics for any items and detailed condition descriptions
If it’s not listed here, it’s sold. Don’t base it on the pictures.
Shipping is free over $25, or $4 per item.
There is always room for negotiation, prices are based on market value, but there is wiggle room especially if you buy more than one game.
Also looking for various CIB 3DS Games, too many to list. Let me know what you have
***
Sega DreamCast Lot $199 + exact price of priority shipping to where you are. Also willing to do local pickup in NYC area.
https://imgur.com/a/rI7aEGs Dreamcast Console with two controllers (one official, one third party), power cord and VGA hookup, (I do not have rgb hookups as the VGA looked the best on my HDMI TV)
Memory Card
Soul Calibur and Resident Evil: Code Veronica (Jewel Cases are not in good condition)
Soul Calibur Manual and case art are in good condition, disc is in good condition with minor cosmetic scratches. Works great.
Resident Evil: Code Veronica manual and case art in good condition. Discs are in ok condition with some scratches. Disc 1 only boots after putting disc 2 in first, for some reason and even then it won’t read past the opening cinematic. (I have researched this and it seems that it is a common problem with some games like Sonic Adventures where the Dreamcast lens has issues reading the discs, regardless of condition) Cosmetically it should be able to be read and Soul Calibur, disc 2 as well as many games I used to have all boot up with zero issues, so it must be that problem.
***
Nintendo Game Boy (loose)
Fortress of Fear $13
Tiny Toons: Wacky Sports $10
NBA All Star $5
Wave Race $10
GB/GBC/GBA instruction booklets: (take all instruction booklets for $65 shipped)
https://imgur.com/a/FqEV0NJ GB:
Alleyway $5
BurgerTime Deluxe $17
Donkey Kong Land $7
Four Player Adapter $7
Golf $5
Motocross Maniacs $5
Pac-Man $7
Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back $10
GBC
Super Mario Bros. Deluxe $5
GBA
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles $7
***
Switch
Cogen Sword of Rewind (Japanese edition with English, New and Sealed) $28
***
Famicom
Hino Tori (Phoenix) (CIB) $37 (Famicom Game)
Dragon Quest (CIB) $40
Dragon Quest II (CIB) $30
Dragon Quest III (CIB) $20
Dragon Quest IV (CIB) $20
Or buy all 4 Dragon Quest games for $99 shipped
***
Super Famicom, SNES/Super Nintendo (cartridges only)
https://imgur.com/a/Fr1yrNR Donkey Kong Country 2 (Super Famicom) $8
Donkey Kong Country 3 (Super Famicom) $8
Final Fight II (Super Famicom) $15
Ganbare Goemon 2, Ganbare Goemon 3, Ganbare Goemon Kirakira Dochu (the 3 games for $29)
The Legend of Mystical Ninja $58
The Magical Quest Starring Mickey Mouse (Pal Version) $8
Super Ghouls N Ghosts (Super Famicom) $12
Torneko No Daiboken (Dragon Quest IV Spin-Off) $15
Street Fighter II (Super Famicom) $8
Street Fighter II Turbo (Super Famicom) $12
Super Street Fighter II (Super Famicom) $12
X-Men Mutant Apocalypse $23
***
Wii
Lost in Blue Shipwrecked (CIB) $9
***
Wii U
Splatoon (CIB, some dents in cover art) $8
Super Mario 3D World (Case and manual only, no disc) $8
***
XBOX/XBOX 360 Games Lot $19 for all three
https://imgur.com/a/NTgXz4R
Max Payne
Splinter Cell
Assassin’s Creed
***
Soundtracks:
Rabi-Ribi LRG $10
***
Pre-order bonus/My Nintendo goodies: (Take all of them for $25 shipped)
https://imgur.com/a/NTgXz4R
Pokémon Piplup Phone Holder (New) My Nintendo $9
Super Mario 3D World Phone and Tech Badge (New) $7
Super Smash Bros. Ultimate Coin (New and sealed) $12
Thanks for looking!
submitted by
KasElGatto to
GameSale [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 01:18 Here2Unpack Sexual Trauma with no source, please help.
15 (M) I created this account specifically to explore this, please don't mind the 'new' feel.
SEVERE WARNING, This post is VERY triggering and contains multiple sexually traumatic events, including CSA
I'm about to turn Sixteen in less than a month. I consider myself to be on the Asexual spectrum, my romantic orientation is unclear. I have two partners, both Males, I'm very happy with them.
I've had a difficult relationship with sex all my life. I've bounced from being sex repulsed to being completely and utterly sex obsessed over and over again. I have no idea why I am the way I am or what's wrong with me. I'm hoping maybe posting here could help.
There are many strange things about me that don't add up. I have stray trauma responses that don't seem to be attached to any sort of memorable trauma at all. I'm diagnosed with PTSD as well as a plethora of other disorders, but have no recollection of a traumatic event that would've kickstarted all of this. I would reasonably call myself sexually disturbed. For as long as I could remember i've been fixated with sex and erotica, All the way back since I was seven years old. I had unrestricted internet access (always a good start to a story i know) And as such fell down some rabbit holes.
By the age of 11 I was already delving into BDSM concepts, and by fourteen started developing what's now a moderately inconvenient masturbation and sex addiction. At twelve I started sexually engaging with my fifteen year old long distance girlfriend at the time. I've snuck sex toys into my house and spend most of my time engaging in some sort of sexual activity. It's bad. And I don't enjoy it. I've tried stopping, i've never gotten further than two days. I've been described as 'hypersexual' by several people, and I feel that it's accurate. I've heard hypersexuality is common in response to sexual trauma, which makes me all the more suspicious.
Since I was little, I would have VIOLENTLY emotional reactions to even hearing the word 'rape'. Any stories of S/A would invoke violent urges, emotions, to the point of triggering some sort of hypomanic episode(s).
I've been vigilant around everyone my entire life, and defensively hostile at a moment's notice. I get especially aggressive when small children are in the area. I will keep an eye on children in public places and scan to see if anyone is following or getting too close. I don't know why I do this, It's just my first instinct.
I've had multiple different nightmares about being raped before. They occur in places I'm familiar with, however, they don't seem like flashbacks. They're all wrong, the world it occurs in isn't realistic, and the perpetrator isn't someone I recognize.
Its unsettling and nonsensical. I have all these responses that point to a sexual assault that doesn't exist in my memories. My brother is completely sex repulsed, always has been. I don't have a father, And I don't see my mother doing anything like that. There's no candidates for a possible rape.
I can only recall one sexually traumatic instance that happened last year, but this all has been going on for a long time. I witnessed a child S/A and it fully awakened what is now my diagnosed OCD.
This part will get a little gross, Trigger Warning for BDSM, Particularly CNC.
I mentioned earlier that I was involved with BDSM early as well, and that's only gotten worse. I feel awful about it. I can only get aroused when I imagine being the 'victim' or receiving end of sexual aggression, and have engaged in dangerous behavior as a result. Using sex toys without lube, purchasing toys that are far too big and going past the point of obvious bodily damage, improper cleaning, the list goes on.
As well as unsafe online sexual behavior, I've received predatory DMs before and have had to actively resist engaging with them despite it being pretty fucking obvious why I shouldn't. I feel incredibly ashamed of a part of me liking the attention. I've had to step away from and delete various accounts to resist posting porn of myself online. The only reason i've really stopped is my loyalty to my partners, otherwise who knows what i'd actually be doing.
I have pretty bad pelvic and lower joint damage, as well as skin damage from abrasions and bruising, it's becoming a bigger and bigger problem. I feel violated almost by my own self. It hurts. I feel disgusting, I am disgusting. I don't know what's wrong with me, but something definitely IS wrong with me. It's gross. so gross. It makes me angry and confused, and sad.
I've only slightly opened up to my partners about my obsession with CNC. I trust them both with my life. I'm terrified of hurting them, especially sexually, so I keep most of my sexual needs and wants tightly locked away.
I'm very distressed. I need help but I don't know what I even need help with. I'm afraid of actively putting myself in a predatory and sexually dangerous situation, I want and need to control this. I need help.
I feel hopeless, and shameful. Even if the fantasies center around me being the victim it goes so incredibly strong against my morals that it makes me want to rip myself apart. I feel like I deserve treatment no better than an actual rapist. If I do get assaulted it'd probably be a result of this stupid horrible behavior, if anything. I'm well aware my mindset is severely dangerous, But i feel genuinely that if I were to get assaulted I'd 100% deserve it. I'm horrified of potentially liking it and wanting more.
To anyone who read this whole thing, I apologize profusely. Mods, feel free to take this down if you need to. Thank you.
submitted by
Here2Unpack to
sexualassault [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 01:14 ChrisDWrites STARLIGHT (The Z Team Book 2) Chapter 31: On the Hunt
Read
THE Z TEAM: Book 1 on
Amazon in ebook/print/Unlimited here.
Reading Links:
Royal Road ScribbleHub Book 1 Sample Start Book 2 Start Previous ***
Supervisor Durio arrived at the
Mounteque sixty-eight minutes after Carnen gave Kemp his ultimatum.
The delay wasn’t Kemp’s fault. She requested an off-the-record debriefing using their cover identity as Ministry of Security agents, the same method she’d first contacted him. Durio agreed and approved a priority docking request at a private airlock reserved for admins and VIPs. He wiped the evidence and then came aboard the ship later than promised.
Carnen got the feeling that was done on purpose but brushed it aside. Durio was in for a surprise if he thought power games would have an effect on the operative teams.
Eptus greeted the supervisor. His pretentious expression broadcast his noble lineage. He offered an excuse but no apology. “I was delayed by bickering captains about to ram each other over who was ahead in the docking queue.”
“I understand, supervisor. Please, follow me,” Eptus said in a measured voice which meant he thought Durio’s answer was bullshit.
While Eptus escorted the supervisor aboard, Warden team waited in the main bay, the cam stream from the interrogation compartment on a display. The converted interior hold now contained a bare table and a chair on either side.
Carnen watched Kemp as she worked on her datapad. She’d shared the intelligence file on Durio while they waited for the Mounteque to dock. Stevson sat in a chair and rested his feet on top of a container, eager to watch what should be an interesting debriefing.
“Durio's from one of the minor noble houses,” Carnen said to Kemp. “According to this report, they have wealth and prestige, but no hope of ever competing for the Imperatrix seat. But that changes if the charter passes and the old guard is phased out. How did you get him to do something that benefitted his political enemy?”
Kemp offered him a self-assured smile. “There is no greater motivation than one’s own beliefs.”
On the display, Eptus led Durio into the interrogation compartment. The operations supervisor stepped inside, walking in the proper posture and measured gait of his noble lineage. He took in the bare room with an air of displeasure, as if it were beneath his presence.
“Please, have a seat,” Eptus said. Durio sat on the table’s far side, Eptus sitting across from him.
“We appreciate your willingness to expedite our request,” Eptus said.
“I would hope so. I put my career on the line in doing what was asked of me to protect the Provenance. I thought you would’ve rushed away from here after retrieving the,” he paused, lowering his voice like he was whispering a secret, “agitators. They cause a commotion wherever they appear, riling up the commoners with their fiery rhetoric.”
“Here’s the problem, Supervisor,” Eptus said. “They weren’t in the container you instructed us to collect.” He opened an image of the container’s interior on the table display.
Durio peered down at it. If he faked a confused expression, he did a fine job of selling it. “A waste recycler? I don’t understand. I saw the transfer pod go into that container. The singers were in it.”
“How can you be certain it was them?”
“Because three female Pree exited Zellis’s theater via the maintenance tunnels and rode a transport pod to whose destination was a reserved luxury suite. It’s not channel science, Supervisor. I watched them board the pod, set it for a maintenance appointment, and locked it down. Here is the proof.” He squinted, sharing a vid to the display. Cam footage of the singers entering the pod. Warden team saw it too, a window on their wall display mirroring what was on the table in the room with Eptus and Durio.
Carnen saw no reason why it couldn’t be the singers. The females looked fit and moved with grace.
“If that is them, the Mystery Man wasn’t with them,” Kemp observed.
“Maybe they fired him after the show. I think he screwed up a few times,” Stevson said. Carnen peered at the pilot. He shrugged. “I told you, I like their music. I’ve seen enough media to know that there were a few choreography mistakes.”
Kemp looked down at him over her datapad. “Should I be concerned that your admiration is a conflict of interest?”
Stevson snorted like the question was ridiculous. “Of course not. They don’t pay me. Kosmogenic does.”
“There are only three explanations,” Eptus went on, drawing Carnen’s attention back to the display. “Either you made a mistake, you swapped the container out on purpose, or someone else swapped the container.“
Durio’s face hardened with indignation. “I didn’t make a mistake or try to deceive you. How dare you chastise me after all that I risked in carrying out this scheme—”
“Let him speak,” Kemp said to Eptus over a comm. The Warden team leader sat there and absorbed the verbal barrage from Durio.
Kemp peered down at her datapad, studying something intently before tapping on the device. Carnen noticed Durio begin to struggle to find his words, his face rippling with emotion. His rant sputtered to a halt. He peered around the room as if disassociating from the conversation.
“Supervisor?” Eptus asked after a stretch of silence.
Durio, now calm and collected, reengaged with Eptus. “I did as you asked. There were no mistakes, I assure you. Someone else must have switched the container before you loaded it. We can check the security cams.”
On the display, a new POV loaded; a wide-angle perspective of the berth holding the container with the transfer pod inside. Durio fast-forwarded through the vid. Tugs, ships, and containers zoomed past. He paused when a tug arrived at the berth. He played it at normal speed. The tug removed the container and delivered it to a freighter that had slipped into the top portion of the POV. The tug returned a minute later clutching a different container and placing it in the berth.
“Damn the Spirits! Someone swapped the container,” Durio said.
“We need to know who,” Eptus said.
“Give me a moment,” Durio said, face twitching. “According to the logs, the container you received was the correct one. Obviously, someone altered them.”
“Who could’ve done this?”
“Fraenk, the other operations supervisor. I never would’ve guessed he had the mental capacity to pull it off.” Durio straightened as he thought of something. “Fraenk brought people into operations for a bit. He said they were hauler friends, and he was giving them a tour.”
“We need to talk to this Fraenk. Can you summon him here?”
“He finished a double. He won’t be happy about this.”
“You’re chief supervisor. Why do you care?”
Durio paused as he opened a comm to the other supervisor. “You haven’t met Fraenk.”
***
Fraenk arrived twenty minutes later looking like he’d been roused from a deep sleep. The hulking Manore stopped outside the airlock hatch, waiting for someone to open it.
Eptus and one other Sentinel operative greeted him. “Supervisor Fraenk, thank you for coming. If you’ll follow me,” Eptus said.
Fraenk eyed the ship’s interior with suspicion. “I’m not going anywhere until you tell me what the hell this is about. Where’s Durio? Why aren’t we meeting in Sanctum operations center?”
“This concerns a sensitive Ministry of Security matter that we wish to discuss with you and Supervisor Durio. Come with me, please.”
“Is your translator module working? I said I’m not going anywhere until—“
Carnen stepped into view from the side of the Mounteque’s airlock. “Time to come aboard, supervisor. And don’t even bother with your PD. It’s not going to work.”
Fraenk’s expression flickered with concern as he gazed at Carnen, no doubt confirming his lack of access to the station hub. “What’s a Human doing with the Pree Ministry of Security?”
“I'm here to corral supervisors who don't follow orders.”
Fraenk didn’t move. Carnen drew a stunner. The Manner supervisor saw the deadly serious expression in the operative’s eyes and stepped into the
Mounteque’s airlock.
***
Fraenk sat on the table’s far side in the hot seat where Durio had been a short time ago. Durio was seated in the opposite chair, hands clasped, his expression the scolding glower of a professor who’d caught a student cheating.
Kemp and Stevson observed from the main hold with the rest of Sentinel team, but Carnen picked a front-row seat in the interrogation hold. He had a feeling Fraenk wouldn’t be cooperative based on Durio's opinion. Fraenk had a long career as a hauler and wasn’t some admin stooge who’d never gotten his hands dirty. Durio and even Eptus would only go so far to get the information the ops teams needed. Carnen would take it further when the time came.
Standing at the desk, Eptus placed a datapad with his credentials in front of Fraenk. “I’m Security Supervisor Eptus, team leader for the Ministry of Security.”
Fraenk shrugged, not bothering to look. “This doesn’t mean anything. Can’t validate it without hub access.”
“This will have to do.” Eptus gave Fraenk a chance to read it. When he passed, Eptus lifted the datapad and placed it in a receptacle along the wall.
“What about him?” Fraenk said, nodding at Carnen.
“He’s a contractor serving in a confidential capacity. That is all I can say.”
Fraenk’s visage flickered between anger and fear. He narrowed his eyes at Carnen. “I know a spook when I see one. Let’s get this over with so I can go back to my bunk.”
Fraenk was sharper than Carnen thought. He further doubted Eptus could scare the ops supervisor into talking.
“How long this takes depends on how cooperative you are,” Eptus said. “We know you swapped containers in one of the berths on the C-4 arm and modified the logs to cover it up. We know your friends who you brought into your office asked you to track it down.“
Fraenk gave Eptus a challenging stare. “Show me the proof or stop wasting my time.”
The Sentinel team supervisor returned Fraenk's hardened gaze. “This concerns a vital security matter my team is investigating. I urge you to cooperate.”
“If you help us, I promise to do my best to lessen any punishment that may result from your actions,” Durio added with that air of elitism Carnen found admins tended to have.
Fraenk regarded his counterpart, then let out a deep, cynical laugh. “You’re so full of shit, Durio. You may be the senior ops supervisor, but that doesn’t mean you can boss me around like I’m some level-one tech. Unless you’re filing a formal complaint, you’d better drop this. I’m not saying anything else without a lawyer.”
“I’ll file a complaint if I have to,” Durio threatened.
“No, you won’t, because if you do, there’ll be a Commonwealth Commerce Department investigation per the stipulations in my contract. Which means, if I did supposedly swap the containers, they’ll want to know why, including what was in them.” Fraenk cocked his head at Durio. “Something tells me that you wouldn’t want them to find out.”
“So you admit to knowing what was in the container?” Eptus said, trying to regain control of the conversation.
“I admit nothing. If there are no more stupid questions, then I’m going back to my bunk.”
Carnen stepped away from the hatch to the side of the table, looming over Fraenk. “Let’s cut the shit, Fraenk. You swapped the containers and gave the singers to your hauler friends. We want the name of their ship.”
Durio made a face like he was stupefied that Carnen had said as much. But the chief supervisor failed to understand what was needed to get what they wanted from Fraenk.
At the demand, Fraenk arched his eyebrows innocently. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Carnen repeated the question. Fraenk leaned forward, close enough for Carnen to smell his alcohol-tinged breath. “Oh, I remember now. It was something like Her Royal Majesty’s Go Fuck Yourself.”
Carnen drew his stunner.
Fraenk glanced at it, then back to Carnen. “If you think—“
The operative jabbed the stunner into Fraenk’s chest. The supervisor yelped and pushed back, almost tipping his chair as he cursed. Carnen had set it too low, enough to hurt like hell but not incapacitate.
Durio stood from his chair, a terrified expression on his face. “That was uncalled for!”
Fraenk slowly got to his feet, rising a full head above Carnen. “Why don’t you put your toy down and we’ll see how tough you are?” he sneered.
Carnen deactivated and locked the stunner then tossed it to Eptus. He was caught off guard and almost dropped it.
Over Durio’s protest, Fraenk raised his fists and stepped at Carnen.
The operative was ready for it and threw a kick into the side of Fraenk’s leading thigh, smacking the meaty part and dropping him to his knees. Carnen followed up with a punch to the Manore’s face. Fraenk toppled over backward, crashing to the deck. He groaned clutching his nose. Blood seeped between his fingers.
Carnen kicked Fraenk in the ribs, keeping him down. The operative then climbed onto Fraenk’s back and placed him in a chokehold. “I want the name of the ship.”
Fraenk cursed at Carnen, and he tightened his grip. Eptus shifted but kept quiet. Durio protested. “He’s a supervisor. You cannot do this!”
The operative ignored Durio and squeezed tighter. Fraenk pleaded, his voice barely audible. “
Stardancer.”
Carnen let up a little and said to Durio, “Find that ship.”
The supervisor only mumbled an incoherent response.
“Kemp,” Carnen said, knowing she was watching.
Whatever she did appeared to work. Durio’s head twitched a bit, and his eyes regained focus. Carnen repeated the request. Durio said, “I have it. The freighter
Stardancer was granted a commerce license a short while ago.” He projected the license to the wall display. “It’s scheduled to rendezvous with the ship Honest Day’s Work which is registered to a micro-corporation with a recovery agent license.”
“What’re they doing meeting with bounty hunters?” Stevson asked over their internal ship comm.
“According to the commerce license, the
Honest Day’s Work will transfer a load of recovered assets.”
“I doubt Acculturation leadership is aboard the ship. What's so important for them to risk this transfer?” Carnen said.
“It could be more stolen material. We have no intel on this,” Eptus said.
“Plot it, Stevson,” Carnen said. He stood, leaving Fraenk in an exhausted heap on the deck.
The Tyrcellus map appeared on the table display. A curving intercept vector sliced through the system as Stevson plotted the ship’s course. “Assuming the
Stardancer didn’t fuck around after they retrieved the singers, then they’re at minimum nine hours ahead of us. And assuming they head for a new destination immediately after the transfer, there’s a low chance we can intercept them.”
Carnen said to Durio, “What if we cancel the commerce license? Prevent the transfer?”
Fraenk cackled, having managed to push himself to a seated position. “Go ahead. That’s a Commonwealth-sponsored license. Canceling will raise a red flag at Sanctum and you’ll have Commerce Department goons up in your business.”
“He’s correct,” Durio said.
“Looks like you’re screwed,” Fraenk said. Everyone in the room turned in his direction. He gave them all a bloody smile.
Durio straightened with a fearful snap. “The Administrator is sending a comm request. Excuse me.” He scurried out of the compartment.
Fraenk shifted into his chair, groaning with each movement. Eptus opened a medkit mounted on the wall and passed a clotting wipe to him. Fraenk took it and held it to his nose.
“Show me the details on the Honest Day’s Work,” Carnen said. He stared at the data on the display, searching for a solution.
“My turn to offer you a deal,” Fraenk said. “As much as I want to beat you to a pulp, I’m willing to walk away from this. I want to keep my job, so you know I’ll keep my mouth shut. But if you don’t let me walk out of here right now, the next person the administrator will be talking to is me. If I’m going down, you’re all coming with me.”
Durio returned to the compartment, drawing everyone’s attention. His face was sunken like he’d seen a lost spirit come to terrorize him. Fear seeped into his voice as he spoke. “The administrator informed me that he spoke with Zellis, the owner of the theater. He is unable to contact the singers who performed at his venue and reported them missing. The administrator is very upset about this and wants the matter investigated immediately.”
“It wasn't me,” Fraenk said. He looked to his counterpart. Durio’s face somehow grew grimmer. “You had something to do with that, didn't you? Kidnapping citizens off Commonwealth-sponsored stations? That's bad news, Durio. not with the Commonwealth Diplomatic fleet heading this way. They won't take kindly to sentient rights violations. They're looking for any excuse to go after the Provenance.”
“No! I didn’t do anything wrong!” Durio said, voice cracking. He pointed at Eptus and Carnen. “They made me help them!” He bent at the waist, hands pressed to either side of his head. “I have to leave. I cannot be involved in this any longer.” He rushed to the hatch and slapped the panel, but Carnen had locked it already. Durio spun, coiled with indignation. “Let me out of here, immediately!”
“Kemp, he’s losing it. We can’t leave him here like this,” Carnen said into the inter-team comm.
“I’m working on it,” she answered.
“You’re running out of time.”
“You cannot leave yet, Supervisor,” Eptus said to Durio.
Fraenk grinned at the unfolding disaster. “You better let us go. Durio is screwed, but you spooks can save your asses.”
“Stevson, do we have departure clearance?” Carnen asked.
“Affirmative. It was granted before Supervisor Durio came aboard,” Stevson replied as the hatch opened. Carnen spun around as Durio stormed out. The Warden team leader glared at Eptus, who lowered his head in defeat.
“What the fuck are you doing?” Carnen growled.
“He is of noble lineage. We cannot detain him like this,” Eptus answered.
“Of course, you can. You have authority from the Imperatrix himself.” Carnen stormed into the passageway after Durio. The supervisor made it to the inner airlock hatch. Carnen re-engaged the lock over his PD. Durio slapped his hand repeatedly against the panel. “I demand that you open this hatch immediately!”
Eptus came up behind Carnen. “Let him go.”
Carnen ignored the Sentinel team supervisor. Over the ship comm, he said, “Last chance, Kemp.”
“I need more time to diagnose. Nothing I do works,” she answered.
“Supervisor Durio,” Carnen said in a measured voice. “I’ll open the hatch, but I need your help with one last thing with Fraenk. It will only take a minute, then I promise you’ll be done with us.”
The offer calmed Durio enough to end his fit. He faced Carnen. “One minute,” he said and marched back into the interrogation hold. Carnen followed him in.
“Let’s get this over with. I will not take the fall for whatever has happened here—“
“Wait—“ Eptus said as Carnen drew a palm-sized pistol and shot Durio in the back of the head at less than a meter. His head rocked forward as a bolt of superheated gas encased in an electromagnetic field punched through tissue and bone. The projectile dissipated upon impact, dumping its kinetic and thermal energy into the interior of the supervisor’s skull.
Durio toppled forward and slapped against the deck, mouth slightly agape, eyes lifeless.
The Sentinel team supervisor’s jaw clenched, his nasal slits quivering in rage. “You murdered a Pree of noble lineage!”
“Outside, now,” Carnen said and marched out of the compartment. Eptus followed. Behind Carnen, the rest of Sentinel and Warden teams entered the passageway from the main hold. Carnen faced Eptus. “I neutralized an asset gone haywire. Did you forget our mission?”
Eptus shifted as he wrestled with his emotions. The words came out with an angry bite. “To ensure the success of Project Fidelity in support of the Provenance.” He bristled. “You should’ve consulted with me before taking such drastic action.”
“I did what needed to be done. If you can’t handle that, then you should find another line of work.” Carnen faced Kemp. “Figure out what happened before this happens again.”
“I’ll investigate Supervisor Durio’s deviations,” she said with a bitter edge.
He stared at her a moment longer, then shifted his eyes to Stevson. “Set a course for the coordinates of the cargo exchange. We’ll dump the body en route.”
“The ships will be gone by the time we get there,” Eptus said.
“I’ll message the
Honest Day’s Work. As Stevson said, they’re bounty hunters. Maybe we can work something out,” Carnen said and returned to the interrogation compartment.
Fraenk’s pale face eyed the dead body. With a resigned sigh, he said, “Guess I’m not going anywhere, am I?”
Caren pulled restraints from his belt and placed them on the table. “No, you’re not.”
submitted by
ChrisDWrites to
HFY [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 01:08 lovelypestilence Mental Health Stigma in males
| Hello! Let’s get credentials out of the way. - Bachelors of Pharmaceutical Sciences (4 yrs) - Licensed pharmacist (4 yrs, licensing exam) - Currently earning a PhD (~5 years total) * Simply put, I’m studying differences in the genes that get the drug out of your body with a special focus in mental health (and if you want to get specific, depressive disorders) a.k.a. “pharmacogenomics”. Now that that’s out of the way, here is some *factual* information with references. Suicide Mortality in the United States 2000-2020 “In 2020, suicide was the 12th leading cause of death for all ages in the United States, changing from the 10th leading cause in 2019 due to the emergence of COVID-19 deaths and increases in deaths from chronic liver disease and cirrhosis. As the second leading cause of death in people aged 10–34 and the fifth leading cause in people aged 35–54, suicide is a major contributor to premature mortality.” https://i.redd.it/rbcp2gd41spa1.gif “The suicide rate for males…increased from 2006 through 2018 (22.8%).” “The suicide rate for males was 3–4 times the rate for females during the 2000–2020 period.” “Rates generally increased over the study period for males aged 15–24 and 25–44, although the rate for males aged 15–24 was statistically unchanged after 2017.” https://i.redd.it/ll43r5w61spa1.gif Garnett MF, Curtin SC, Stone DM. Suicide mortality in the United States, 2000–2020. NCHS Data Brief, no 433. Hyattsville, MD: National Center for Health Statistics. 2022. DOI: https://dx.doi.org/10.15620/cdc:114217 A study conducted in Australia which looked at the media portrayal of depression in men: - “In the news articles analyzed, being open about experiencing depression (often referred to as being “out”) was dominantly constructed in a positive way to deal with depression.Talking openly about these problems was often an important step toward recovery from depression (sometimes referred to as being “free”)” o The article gives 2 examples here: one of “coming out” (positive views), and one as “suffering from depression” (negative views) o Scholz B, Crabb S, Wittert GA. “We’ve got to break down the shame”: portrayals of men’s depression. Qual Health Res. 2014. PMID 25212853. A study in 3047 Canadians addressing the stigma toward depression: - Found men had higher stigma scores than women. - Endorsing viral infection as a cause for depression was associated with higher stigma score for women - “Instead, men who reported family or friends as the best help for depression and those who did not know what the best help might be had higher mean stigma scores than others” - “In men, statistical interactions were found between considering weakness of character as a causal factor for depression and being” o “…analysis showed that participants who reported weakness of character as a causal factor had higher stigma scores” - Wang J, Fick G, Adair C, et. al. Gender specific correlates of stigma toward depression in a Canadian general population sample. J Affect Disord. 2007. PMID 17292968. A study in depression literacy in 3047 Canadians: - More than 45% of participants considered people with depression were “unpredictable” - Over 20% thought that people with depression were “dangerous” - Wang J, Lai D. The relationship between mental health literacy, personal contacts and personal stigma against depression. J Affect Disord. 2008. PMID 18261806. A study of 38 men in Canada on discourses of help-seeking in depression: https://preview.redd.it/q6trwkq91spa1.png?width=600&format=png&auto=webp&s=4991bce267addc06e1cd50993e560bd08949c67f https://preview.redd.it/xblc9nq91spa1.png?width=591&format=png&auto=webp&s=e6ae364c59fcc4c94494e1074c57450ca7c93c41 - Johnson JL, Oliffe JL, Kelly MT, et.al. Men’s discourses of help-seeking in the context of depression. Sociol Health Illn. 2012. PMID 21707661. I don't think I have to say anything else, at least to this group. Feel free to use this as fuel Ethan. PS. many of these studies use gender "men" instead of sex "male". Plz don't come for me. submitted by lovelypestilence to h3h3productions [link] [comments] |
2023.03.25 01:06 Thitzitery When will I (20M) find another (20F) "love of life"?
Okay, I've been trying to find ways to put this out somehow, I talked to a friend about but I wanted more pieces of advices. In 2019, my last year in high school, I became friends with this girl (let's call her Marnie). Marnie and I were always into the same things, we had a lot in common, we liked the same artists, movies and eventually books (after she incentivated me to start reading more, now I'm a bookworm because of her). In 2020 with all the COVID sh*t, we barely saw each other, but still we talked every single day. In 2021 when things were starting to get back to normal, we were hanging out together once again, we rewatched all the Studio Ghibli's movies, and got drunk listening to indie songs (yeah, we're lame young hollowheads). But still in 2021 things got a little bit deeper between us and it didn't look like a friendship anymore, we had made out sometimes in the past just fooling around, but now it was more constant and I started confusing my feelings for her (actually I think I always felt like that about her, but refused to accept it). Anyways, we kept this confusing relationship without labeling it, and I never talked about it because I didn't want to hear an eventually "I don't wanna a relationship", though I know we loved each other, at least we said that a lot. The problem was that she hates São Paulo (a Brazilian state), she lived here because her mother lived here and she'd have a better education in school, but deep inside I always knew she'd do anything to go back to Bahia (another state), where she was born and raised, to live with her dad. In 2022 we were already in college, but she passed in a test of a good university in Bahia and didn't think twice, she moved away and eventually started a new life. Today we're not as close as we used to, and I don't think I'll feel anything closer than what I felt for her, I know I'm still young (I'm 20), but it sucks that I can't have that kind of connection with anybody else that I met later. In the end of 2022 I knew she was dating a guy there, and I am fooling around with someone every now and then (she's a friend of ours) but it's superficial. Well, with all that said, I just wanted to know how to feel things like those again.
submitted by
Thitzitery to
relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 01:00 oatmealismyfav More data, more problems
Disclaimer: I'm a 4th year PhD student studying statistics, so I may use too much technical lingo.
Background
On stream today Destiny & guests were discussing the question of: is a small random sample better than a large non-random sample? It turns out there is a peer-reviewed statistics
paper about this! The author even writes:
Which one should I trust more: a 1% survey with 60% response rate or a non-probabilistic dataset covering 80% of the population?
He's interested in actually
quantifying the bias of your statistics under random & non-random sampling schemes. Basically, bias is related to
- (Sample quality) The correlation between the values of interest & whether those values were recorded (actually sampled). For example, suppose you're measuring adult weight but you only sample obese people--the correlation will be high.
- (Sample quantity) The ratio of the percentage of excluded data to the percentage of included data. For example, you sample 100 people out of the 400 students in a high school; 75% are excluded and 25% are included.
- (Overall difficulty) The variance/standard-deviation of the variable you're measuring.
Quality and quantity
In classical statistics when your sample is random, your estimation error is primarily controlled through your sample size--as you collect more data, your estimation error goes down. This should be intuitive.
There's actually a trade-off between sample quality and quantity--we just often don't talk about it because researchers try their best to do random sampling. Once your sample is non-random, you get fucked. Now, your error is largely determined by the
population size (not sample size), which is BAD (because we can't control that unless we redefine our population, which gets into unethical territory). While in a random scheme, doubling your sample size maybe decreased your error by a factor of 2^(-1/2), in the non-random scheme, doubling your sample size hardly reduces your margin of error. Your only real way to reduce error is to sample nearly the entire population...which is hard for obvious reasons. In other words, your error becomes intractable, and the only way to make it tractable is to sample the vast majority of the population (arbitrarily close to 100%). I'll note that "bad quality" isn't hard to achieve--in terms of correlation (which is between -1 and 1, 1 being a perfect positive linear relationship & 0 being no relationship), we're talking about decimals that require scientific notation. As the author says:
For large populations, such as the US eligible voter population, achieving [good quality] for [an] arbitrary sampling rate without probabilistic sampling (equivalent) requires a miracle.
To illustrate the quality-quantity tradeoff, the author introduces the idea of an
effective sample size. Basically:
for some fixed quality (non-random sample) and sample size, what's the equivalent random sample size? You can think of it as how much information you
really have. The author provides the following simulated example: suppose you're sampling from the entire US voting population but your sampling quality (this'll be a measure from 0 to 1) is 0.05, you need to sample HALF OF THE US VOTING POPULATION to get an effect sample size of just 400. In this context, 0.05 is actually pretty high, but this just goes to show that even a
tiny correlation between the sample and inclusion indicator can have a profound impact on the amount of information you really have.
As a side note: with bad quality, your confidence intervals will be wrong, fucking any hope of inference. The author provides a more concrete example using some data from the 2016 election. Given a very generous quality measure, they calculate that the effective sample size of (roughly) all 2016 polls combined was 5% of those sampled; that is, the equivalent random sample is 5% as large as what was collected. This in turn had an impact on the margin of error; specifically, the reported margin of error was MUCH smaller than what it should have been (the MOEs were vastly under-estimated...leading to a surprising election night).
Disclaimer: this is kind of a back of the envelope calculation he does, but it's pretty compelling imo. Overall, even a small reduction in sampling quality can have a profound impact on your effective sample size. Also, it's worth pointing out that in real life we can't ever calculate the correlation between inclusion and the variable...because we don't record people who aren't included. TLDR: having a large non-random sample doesn't necessarily help you & can fuck your inferences. Whipped this up in 30 minutes, so I apologize if it is confusing.
EDIT: as
u/TallPsychologyTV mentioned in the comments, this critique isn't exclusive to Aella. This is a common problem that exists in peer reviewed research as well. I'll note however, smaller studies with some non-random non-response bias aren't hurt as much as studies with huge sample sizes. Your error estimates shouldn't be as biased. Anyway, I'm super blackpilled on all scientific research though; kids, don't do a PhD in statistics, it ruins everything.
submitted by
oatmealismyfav to
Destiny [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 00:33 fanimal16 The Jade Warriors concept
I have concept of team of animal superheroes, called The Jade Warriors, which are actually animals from Chinese Zodiac (plus cat, who is an outcast). Here are their bios:
Raven - Street rat, best friends with Boulder. Can be seen exploring various parts of cities and reading books in libraries, which makes him one of the wisest members of the team. Almost always feels guilty and takes the blame, even if it wasn't his fault. Powers are gravity altering (many people mistake it for telekinesis) and danger sense.
Boulder - Ox who is best friends with Raven. Constantly trains his abilities, fearing that he will be replaced. Rarely shows emotion, but still enjoys little things. Powers are enhanced strength and geokinesis.
Ira - Bengal tigress with a very short temper and a great hatred for lions, will explode (both metaphorically and literally) if you even mention those creatures. Wants to be referred to as "True Queen of the Jungle". Powers are pyrokinesis and roar that can blow away the opposing person.
Sunny - A white rabbit, very kind and willing to help anyone, though can be timid at times. Secretly friends with Umbra, outcast of the group. Does not like being called useless, especially if the offender is Ira or Gale. Powers are healing (cannot revive dead) and photokinesis.
Umbra - Ginger tabby cat whose one half of body is black. Outcast of the group who secretly helps Sunny, in exchange for friendship and acceptance. She is (unintentionally) the reason Raven constantly feels guilt. Powers are umbrakinesis (haha lol), as well as shapeshifting. Her powers are actually curse, and she cannot control them.
Loong - A dragon, who was born as a fish. Just like Sunny, he is very kind individual, serving as a voice of reason, as well as leader. Rarely every loses patience. Best friends with Sunny, since the time he saved her in The Great Race, and friendly rivals with Ira. For some reason, after his transformation, he didn't get full control over weather, like other dragons did, but got them after The Great Race (for those who are confused, he only had the ability to move clouds and cause normal rains, which is why he managed to save village from drought in The Great Race), plus the ability to change his size.
Hyacinth - Indochinese spitting cobra who is very cunning, and most remarkable thing about him is his smug smirk. He has bitter rivalry with Liberty, since he sabotaged her in The Great Race. Expert at trickery. Powers are dematerializing and rematerializing at will, while dematerialized, he cannot be seen, heard or touched, but he still keeps his senses (and also cannot interact with anything material), as well as acid generation and manipulation.
Liberty - Mare that loves showing off, though she is more decent than Gale and Ira. Hates following rules, which gets her in a lot of trouble. Is in a bitter rivalry with Hyacinth, since the sabotage he pulled on her in The Great Race. Powers are enhanced speed and metal manipulation.
Alba - Nubian goat with mother-like tendencies. Has to constantly break fights, especially between Twig and Gale. Also very protective of the group members. Powers are force-field creation and emotion manipulation through hallucinations.
Twig - Macaque which loves having fun and messing with others. Friends with Gale, even though they look more like enemies. Loves wearing human clothing. Powers are swapping held items via teleportation and control over plants.
Gale - Rooster which constantly complains about others' negative qualities. Very prideful, but very deep down, he has golden heart, though no one realizes it, except Loong. Powers are projectile feathers and scrying which can extend to taking over other's body, while leaving his original body in the stasis.
Hope - Optimistic shiba inu which always looks on bright side of the things. This can make her oblivious to problems and unable to read others' emotions correctly. Best friends with Zhu. Powers are generating a lasso made of chi, and enhancing her teammates' abilities.
Zhu - Pig which is confident and commonly snarks at others' stupidity, but tries her best to make others feel like actual part of the team. Best friends with Hope. Powers are time stopping, which lasts about 10 seconds, and imbuing inanimate things with life, giving them free will and actual personality.
So, what do you think?
submitted by
fanimal16 to
Superhero_Ideas [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 00:19 IneptLobster [WTS][US-NJ] WE/Cybergun Desert Eagle ACOG Replica Real Steel Parts Mock Suppressor Magazines 40mm Shower Grenades
(Bump)
So, I have some new items for sale. Fresh in from the depths of my airsoft gear closet.
(Items that include shipping are CONUS only. International shipping is paid by the buyer. Prices are firm. All sales are final.)
With that said...
Buy some stuff!!
EDIT: Updated Timestamp Here
Guns
And the Gear
Item | Info | Pics | Price |
Midwest Industries Drop In Quad Rail | Brand New Real Steel. Rifle Length. Was a stand-in for the KAC M5 on my M16A4 Clone | https://imgur.com/mupoQ3z https://imgur.com/IvRBAOy https://imgur.com/i0E8oDb | $170 $150 Shipped |
CRUSHUNT Replica ACOG | Brand New Fiber Optic, No Tritium, Red Chevron, 4x Magnification | https://imgur.com/Vk6KJDo https://imgur.com/8IRO5Ud https://imgur.com/baYK4vp https://imgur.com/baN5HLf https://imgur.com/tdAedxq https://imgur.com/Z5akFwb | $90 $70 SOLD |
Element Bravo Replica ACOG | Replica RMR, Crosshair Reticle, No Illumination | https://imgur.com/Vk6KJDo https://imgur.com/UpMnbYu https://imgur.com/yIZ79eV https://imgur.com/H4rfKF1 | $60 $50 Shipped |
Vortex Optics StrikeFire II | Mounted on my real AR before I bought an ACOG, Red/Green Dot Version, Real Steel Optic | https://imgur.com/2CG75kf https://imgur.com/w7ZImzE https://imgur.com/1DFxjkh https://imgur.com/SKGFVjf https://imgur.com/7b3zJ9d | $180 $150 Shipped |
Replica Silencerco Osprey .45 | FDE, 16mm positive threading | https://imgur.com/ZXWrnSs https://imgur.com/7ek32fN https://imgur.com/XUXGL66 https://imgur.com/YL4SmLu | $75 $50 Shipped |
Cybergun/VFC FNX Magazine, FDE | Stock, no leaks. I have two. | https://imgur.com/qh4fETT | $35 $30ea Shipped |
40mm MOLLE Pouches | Each holds two 40mm rounds. I have two. | https://imgur.com/Uj9DI6i | $20 $15ea Shipped |
90rnd Shower Grenades 40mm | Each holds 90 bbs. I have six. | https://imgur.com/Uj9DI6i | $25 $20ea Shipped |
submitted by
IneptLobster to
airsoftmarket [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 00:15 mandc1754 Are you familiar with the case of Linda Loaiza, a Venezuelan woman abducted in 2001, that made its way over to the IACHR (Inter-American Comission of Human Rights)?
Back in 2001, Linda Loaiza was a 18 woman that like many other young people in Venezuela moved to Caracas the country's capital to study. She disappeared for a total of 114 days, and was found by the Chacao Police from an appartment in that part of city. When her sister, Ana Secilia, tried to report Linda missing the police dismissed her and said Linda had gone with her boyfriend and therefore she just needed to wait. And even when multiple other attempts were made to report her missing, not even one report was taken by police.
Loiza's case is a prime example how Venezuela's law enforcement fails to protect victims of gendered and domestic violence. Luis Carrera Almoína, the perpetrator, had multiple complaints presented against him by, at least, ten other victims.
By the time she managed to scape on July 19th 2001, Linda Loiza presented multiple injuries ranging from a teared bottom lip, injuries to her ear canal due to the constant beatings she was subjected to, internal bleeding, multiple traumatic brain injuries, a broken jaw and nose, restraint marks on her wrists, legs and legs. She was also malnourished.
It is important to understand that Venezuela's government plays a role in this case. Linda Loaiza wasn't just a victim of the man that abducted, raped and almost killed her. She was victimized by the Venezuelan Justice System and the government, too.
The authorities knew who was the culprit, it took them 53 days to arrest him and when they did he was sent into house arrest. This case went through 97 judges, 16 state attorneys, and the jury candidates were threatened. The trial was only concluded after a 13 day hunger strike.
At trial, the State's attorney accused the victim of being promiscuous and Colombian,Loaiza was forced by that same attorney to sign a affidavit at gunpoint. The worst of her injuries was not exposed at trial, and pictures that showed her alongside Almoína were never shown at trial. Basic, common sense tests like using Luminol were never performed in the crime scene. The State never made an effort to prove that her injuries were the result of the repeated sexual and physical assaults she was a victim of for almost 4 months.
In november of 2018 the Inter-American Court on Human Rights ruled in favor of Loaiza, condemning the multiple violations of her human rights that the Venezuelan State had incurred during the investigation and trial phase in her case. Linda Loaiza, today an attorney herself, while praising the efforts of the IACHR recognizes that an international ruling is useless if the Venezuelan government (today made off of the same group of people than 22 years ago) refuses to even aknowledge it's existence.
Luis Antonio Carrera Almoína was acquited of all charges in 2004, the sentence was changed in 2006 and he was sent to prison for 6 years for several felonies, except sexual assault or rape. In 2008 it was decided that he had completed his sentence and his whereabouts are unknown since then. It is important to mention that Luis Carrera Almoína is the son of Luis Carrera Damas a prominent writer, and at the time that Linda Loaiza was abducted, the Head Dean of an important public university in Venezuela.
Sources:
https://www.nytimes.com/es/2021/03/23/espanol/opinion/linda-loaiza.html https://cejil.org/caso/linda-loaiza-lopez-soto/ https://www.corteidh.or.cdocs/casos/articulos/seriec_362_esp.pdf https://www.bbc.com/mundo/noticias-america-latina-46243965 submitted by
mandc1754 to
TrueCrime [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 00:12 Chameleonpolice Questions from a Pair of Peerless Parents
My wife and I are the parents of two great boys, aged 13 and 6. Between the two of us, we have no friends that have kids, so we struggle to recognize behaviors that may or may not be concerning.
Our 13 year old is likely on the autism spectrum, but if he is, it is very high functioning to the point that it has never caused any functional problems. He does great in school, he has lots of friends, he expresses satisfaction with his relationships. We overhear him talking to them while playing games and he has fun, joke, and laughs. This all seems to vanish any time is around either of us or most other adults. His affect becomes completely flat, answers questions with 4 to 5 words at most, and never elaborates or offers new information to continue a conversation. The way he acts around us makes us feel like he is totally uninterested in us. We've attempted to explore this with him many times, such as whether he's having any problems in school, feeling depressed, etc and he has always told us he isn't having problems. We have an open door policy about coming to us with concerns of any kind. His interactions with his brother are very limited. Little brother has a speech delay and is also on the spectrum, so communication isn't great and almost always leads to conflict. Pretty much the only way he interacts with his little brother is teasing or agitating him intentionally to the point of fights.
We have explained to him that these behaviors hurt our feelings, as it makes us feel rejected, and we of course don't appreciate that his vulnerable little brother is little more than an annoyance to him, but this has yet to change anything. So far we have not issued really any punishments because we worry that it would push him further away, but his disregard for our feelings is reaching a head and causing us a lot of distress.
My main questions are: how common is this in kids? I have two brothers myself but even between fights we would still play with each other and interact. We are considering seeking counseling services for him to determine if some gain could be had from occasional therapy of some kind. I know that kids aren't going to keep their parents as their best friends forever but at this point we feel like we're doing something wrong.
submitted by
Chameleonpolice to
Parenting [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 00:11 Fantastic-Gift349 Update from the last on
July 2005, Science Magazine Article:
https://www.sciencemag.org/site/feature/misc/webfeat/125th/ John Eccles - How The Self Controls Its Brain
Colin McGinn - The Mysterious Flame
Jaegwon Kim - Philosophy of Mind
Wilder Penfield - Mystery of the Mind
Richard Leblanc - The White Paper: Wilder Penfield, the Stream of Consciousness, and the Physiology of Mind
Can functional brain imaging discover consciousness in the brain?
https://www.ingentaconnect.com/content/imp/jcs/2001/00000008/00000003/1089?fbclid=IwAR0S3Ipv4l2VpkKkLZOy-EZVQFta-AxsGioKwh49rxylBW-0yhkTWsgslW8 Jerome Feldman - The neural binding problem(s)
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3538094/ Michael Shermer - “What Is Pseudoscience?” Scientific American, 1 Sept. 2011,
www.scientificamerican.com/article/what-is-pseudoscience/.
Neural Decoding of Visual Imagery During Sleep:
https://science.sciencemag.org/content/340/6132/639 Dreamed Movement Elicits Activation in the Sensorimotor Cortex:
https://www.cell.com/current-biology/fulltext/S0960-9822(11)01031-1 The fusiform face area: a cortical region specialized for the perception of faces:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1857737/ Constraint-induced movement therapy to enhance recovery after stroke:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4361809/ Jeffery Schwartz & Sharon Begley - The Mind and The Brain
Systematic Changes in Cerebral Glucose Metabolic Rate After Successful Behavior Modification Treatment of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/8629886/ Neuroanatomical Aspects of Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy Response in Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. An Evolving Perspective on Brain and Behaviour:
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/9829025/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12495527/ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3579194/ :
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/11549754/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12595193/ Rodolfo Llinas & Patrica Churchland - The Mind-Brain Continuum
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/8423485/ https://www.researchgate.net/publication/282871198_Sight_and_blindness_in_the_same_person_Gating_in_the_visual_system https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24922512/ J. M. Quen - Split Minds/Split Brains: Historical and Current Perspectives
https://pdfs.semanticscholar.org/47ec/decc2ac8073516914dd1eeb2dbf4e7ad9ac3.pdf https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/6678535/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/2760599/ https://journals.lww.com/jonmd/Abstract/1991/03000/Optical_Differences_in_Multiple_Personality.3.aspx https://www.southampton.ac.uk/news/2014/10/07-worlds-largest-near-death-experiences-study.page https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/2333357 https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/6678535/ Can be updated i delete the tags so you'll exactly go through the links Never accuse me of not saying my sources update one
Identification and characterization of diverse coherences in the Fenna–Matthews–Olson complex:
https://www.nature.com/articles/s4155...
Quantum Effects in Biology: Bird Navigation:
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science...
Molecular Vibration-Sensing Component in Human Olfaction:
https://www.pnas.org/content/108/9/3797 How quantum entanglement in DNA synchronizes double-strand breakage by type II restriction endonucleases:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/arti...
Visualizing transient Watson–Crick-like mispairs in DNA and RNA duplexes:
https://www.nature.com/articles/natur...
Quantum Jitters Video:
https://today.duke.edu/2015/03/quantu...
Can quantum probability provide a new direction for cognitive modeling:
https://www.cambridge.org/core/journa...
Quantum Structure in Cognition:
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science...
Is there something quantum-like about the human mental lexicon?
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/arti...
Stuart Hameroff , “Quantum Cognition and Brain Microtubules”
Dr. Stuart Hameroff - Quantum Cognition and Brain Microtubules: • Dr. Stuart Hamero...
Aberrant parenting and delayed offspring development in rats exposed to lithium:
https://www.biologicalpsychiatryjourn...
Matthew Fisher “Quantum Cognition - Theory and Experiment” • Quantum Cognition...
Are we quantum computers, or merely clever robots?
https://www.kitp.ucsb.edu/sites/defau...
Information processing in brain microtubules:
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science...
Live visualizations of single isolated tubulin protein self-assembly via tunneling current:
https://www.nature.com/articles/srep0...
Atomic water channel controlling remarkable properties of a single brain microtubule:
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science...
Deep inside cells, a clue to the mind:
https://www.telegraphindia.com/india/...
Anesthetic Alterations of Collective Terahertz Oscillations in Tubulin Correlate with Clinical Potency:
https://www.nature.com/articles/s4159...
Henry Margenau - The Miracle of Existence
Henry P. Stapp - Mind, Matter, and Quantum Mechanics
Bruce Rosenblum & Fred Kuttner - The Quantum Enigma
Paul Davies & John Gribbin - The Matter Myth
"Change the mind and you change the brain”: effects of cognitive- behavioral therapy on the neural correlates of spider phobia:
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12595...
Jeffery Schwartz - The Mind and the Brain
Donald Hoffman - The Case Against Reality
David Chalmers - The Conscious Mind
Jaegwon Kim - Philosophy of Mind
Frank Jackson - From Metaphysics to Ethics
J. P. Moreland - "Substance Dualism and the Unity of Consciousness" in The Blackwell's Companion to Natural Theology
Robert Koons & George Bealer - The Waning of Materialism
Colin McGinn - The Mysterious Flame
Daniel Dennett - Consciousness Explained
Andrei Linde - Universe, Life, Conscious
Dr. Edward F. Kelly: Consciousness is More Than a Product of Brain Activity
Ian stevenson
https://med.virginia.edu/perceptual-studies/who-we-are/history-of-dops/dr-ian-stevenson/ ir Roger Penrose. Quantum Consciousness Theorist — Co-creator of the Orch OR model of the quantum nature of consciousness and memory.
http://GF2045.com/speakers/ Knighted in 1994 for his contributions to science, Sir Roger Penrose OM FRS, is an English mathematical physicist, mathematician and philosopher.
The extraordinary scope of his work ranges from quantum physics and theories of human consciousness to relativity theory and observations on the structure of the universe. Penrose is internationally renowned for his scientific work in mathematical physics, in particular for his contributions to general relativity and cosmology. His primary interest is in a field of geometry called tesselation, the covering of surfaces with tiles of different shapes.
Among numerous prizes and awards, he received the 1988 Wolf Prize for physics, which he shared with Stephen Hawking for their contribution to our understanding of the universe.
He is the Emeritus Rouse Ball Professor of Mathematics at the Mathematical Institute of the University of Oxford, as well as an Emeritus Fellow of Wadham College.
"There is a current view that consciousness is something which arises from some complicated computation. So we have our computers, and people think that because they can do things amazingly fast, and they can calculate very quickly, and they can play chess extremely well, that they are superior to us even, and it is only some complicated aspect of this computational activity that somehow consciousness arises from that. Now my view is quite different from this. I think there is a lot of computational activity going on in the brain, but this is basically unconscious. So consciousness seems to me to be something quite different."
For more information about the GF2045 congress, please visit
http://www.GF2045.com https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3WXTX0IUaOg This is the paranormal study division /
https://med.virginia.edu/perceptual-studies/our-research/ This is the field girl a evidence of awareness frome doctor burns
https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2023/03/22/1165131907/neuroplasticity-plasticity-glass-half-full-girl is this woman has lost half brain of her left side it showed not to hold her back it made her better and shes perfectly aware angst all odds showing the mind is stronger than most think
This is my study welcome
This part is different someone has passed away and there getting part of my studies mrs holly the teacher that played a big role on who am today rest in peace i hope your in a better place she was the one she will be remembered forever
Near-Death Experiences are intensely vivid and often life-transforming experiences, many of which occur under extreme physiological conditions such as trauma, ceasing of brain activity, deep general anesthesia or cardiac arrest in which no awareness or sensory experiences of any kind should be possible according to the prevailing views in neuroscience. View Dr. Bruce Greyson’s informative personal Website.
A near-death experience, or NDE, is a common pattern of events that many people experience when they are experiencing intense threat, are seriously ill or come close to death. Although NDEs vary from one person to another, they often include such features as the following: feeling very comfortable and free of pain a sensation of leaving the body, sometimes being able to see the physical body while floating above it the mind functioning more clearly and more rapidly than usual a sensation of being drawn into a tunnel or darkness a brilliant light, sometimes at the end of the tunnel a sense of overwhelming peace, well-being, or absolute, unconditional love a sense of having access to unlimited knowledge a “life review,” or recall of important events in the past a preview of future events yet to come encounters with deceased loved ones, or with other beings that may be identified as religious figures While these features are commonly reported, many NDEs differ from this pattern and include other elements. For example, some near-death experiences may be frightening or distressing rather than peaceful. We are interested in hearing about all kinds of near-death and similar experiences, and in studying their effect on persons who have them. Veridical NDEs We are particularly interested in studying NDEs that may bear on the question of whether the mind can function outside the physical body, and on whether we may survive bodily death. One such type of experience is the so-called veridical NDE, in which experiencers acquire verifiable information that they could not have obtained by any normal means. For example, some experiencers report seeing events going on at some distant location, such as another room of the hospital; or an experiencer might meet a deceased loved one who then communicates verifiable information the experiencer had not known. Other kinds of NDEs that may bear on the mind/body question include those in which mental functioning seems to be enhanced despite physiological evidence that the brain is impaired. The causes of NDEs are complex and not fully known. While many medical and psychological explanations have been offered, they remain speculative and often fall short of explaining the entire phenomenon. Participate in Research:
1) Investigating physician barriers to acceptance of near-death experiences-IRB-SBS Protocol #5305 Call for research with physicians who have had a near-death experience. Dr. Marieta Pehlivanova and Dr. Bruce Greyson are recruiting physicians who have had a near-death experience (NDE) for an online study. The purpose of the study is to learn about physicians’ attitudes toward NDEs. These are personal and deeply transformative experiences that patients can experience when they are in a medical crisis or close to death. Patients sometimes report the feeling of leaving their bodies, going through a tunnel, strong positive emotions, and a sense of having a life review, among others. Because of the impact of NDEs on experiencers’ lives, patients sometimes talk about these experiences with their physicians. This research aims to improve these interactions. We are interested in your participation even if you have not had patients who have reported an NDE. Participation in the study will take about 15 minutes of your time and will consist of an anonymous online questionnaire. You are eligible to participate if you are 18 years of age or older, are a physician in any specialty, have had a near-death experience, and are fluent in English. This research project has been approved by the University of Virginia’s Institutional Review Board for the Social Sciences (protocol #530 If you are a physician who has had a near-death experience, are fluent in English, and you are interested in participating in this study, please contact the investigators at
[email protected] and
[email protected] .
2) Near-Death Experiences, IRB-SBS Protocol #3365: Bruce Greyson and Marieta Pehlivanova are conducting ongoing research into NDEs. If you are over age 18, currently healthy, and would like to share a near-death experience of any type with the researchers at the Division of Perceptual Studies, please share your experience via Contact Us. 3) Near-Death Experiences: Comparing Two Scales of Near-Death Experience Features, IRB-SBS Protocol #4885 Call for research participants who have had a near-death experience Dr. Bruce Greyson and Dr. Marieta Pehlivanova at the UVA Division of Perceptual Studies are recruiting individuals who have had a near-death experience (NDE) for an online study. These are personal and transformative experiences that sometimes happen when one is close to death or under the threat of death. This research asks for your opinion about the wording of questionnaires about NDEs and will allow researchers to improve these questionnaires to better reflect the experiences people have. Participation in the study will take up to 20 minutes of your time and will consist of a single online questionnaire. You are eligible to participate if you have had an NDE, are 18 years of age or older, and are fluent in English. You will not be paid for your participation. If you are interested in enrolling in this study, please contact Marieta Pehlivanova for the link to fill out the survey (
[email protected]). Please do not fill out this questionnaire more than once, if you receive it from different sources. Thank you for your support of this important research. Near-death experiencer Anita Moorjani and Dr. Brian Walker
Dr. Bruce Greyson, Anita Moorjani and Dr. Brian Walker visiting DOPS, May 2019 Author and NDE experiencer Anita Moorjani, and her former doctor at the time of her profound NDE, Dr. Brian Walker, visited Dr. Greyson in May of 2019 to exchange rich, thought-provoking ideas around the fascinating topic of near-death experiences. Dr. Brian Walker and Anita recorded an interesting interview while they were visiting us at the UVA Division of Perceptual Studies. We invite you to watch this video of Anita Moorjani and Dr. Brian Walker. Dr. Walker was a witness to Anita’s severely deteriorated medical condition before she had her profound near-death experience. In her best selling book “Dying to Be Me“, Anita writes about the life affirming changes she experienced after her NDE. In the book she describes the events and serious medical illness which led to her profound near-death experience. Near-death experiencers Anita Moorjani and Dr. Authors and near-death experiencers Eben Alexander and Anita Moorjani had complex, medically documented illnesses at the time they experienced their profound, life-altering near-death experiences. Both were gravely ill and their recoveries in both cases astounded and perplexed the attending medical professionals. Eben wrote a best selling book describing his transformative near-death experience and the dire medical circumstances leading up to them. His best selling book is called “Proof of Heaven“. Eben Alexander granted Dr. Greyson permission to review his medical records resulting in Dr. Greyson’s academic analysis of this case which can be seen here (pdf). Anita and Eben attended a meeting of the DOPS researchers to talk about their NDEs. We enjoyed a fascinating discussion with them regarding the many layers of life affirming aftereffects of near-death experiences.
https://www.everystudent.com/features/is-there-a-god.html submitted by
Fantastic-Gift349 to
afterlife [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 00:09 justicebeaver83 Looking for advice
Hi all
Just looking for some advice as a returning player for a recurring theme in my games.
By way of background... I used to absolutely fiend dota at university in 2014-16 at which time i was hovering around 4.5k maining position 5. Job/family etc then happens and i play very infrequently/not at all until last year i found myself with some time off and decided to get back into it. I recalibrate at just under 2k in the crusader bracket so I decide to play mostly mid and carry in order to climb as quickly as possible.
To my surprise this has been alot more difficult than i expected and I have a relatively low win rate (55-60%). Yes there are alot of smurfs in the bracket but this isnt actually what concerns me... The biggest problem seems to be my mid game decision making - the game has changed so much and my game sense is off - my ability to decide when it is safe to show in lane/farm and when we are strong enough to push seems to be completely incorrect.
Some games I am clearly just a better laner than the opponent and this leads to a huge snowball and a win. The games that concern me follow a pattern as follows (as mid or carry):
- I comfortably win my lane and out cs/zone the opponent
- The other lanes are either trading even or often struggling and capitulating
- At around 6-10min one or both of my cores is completely zoned out of lane and starts to jungle. After 10min for some reason in 2k games it is common for the entire team to be completely off map and not in lanes for long periods of time.... ?
- I feel like i am strong because I have dumpstered the lane, so I play too aggressively thinking I am making space for my team and usually die once or twice to ganks/rotations and feed away my advantage
- At this point again my other 2 cores are generally jungling and the other team is also jungling/playing off map making it very hard to safely farm a lane
Historically in this situation I would just ask the supports to play behind me and just barrel down lanes and brute force it given i know i am at least 1 if not 2 items ahead of all the other cores. It seems wierd that some of these games just seem unsalvageable despite a huge laning advantage and I am certain that I am doing something wrong to throw the game. The map is used so inefficiently and there is such a heavy focus on kills that the game just feels 'wrong' to me sometimes.
These are the things I have tried so far
- Farm the safest lane - seems to prompt wierd 3-5 man gank squad attacks in this low bracket - people just run at you as soon as you show lol
- Ward/Farm the enemy jungle - works pretty well, but again it sometimes feels like the enemy mid is just sweeping the jungle looking for you with his god damn panzer division gank squad behind him
- Play ultra safe and focus on not taking risks/preserving my own advantage - this seems to allow the player that I destroyed in lane to emerge from the jungle 10min later with all the items he needs
- Try to just buy early fighting items and clean outplay the other team at a numbers disadvantage (on heroes that can do so like the spirits etc) - this seems to not work that often and games always seem to go late regardless of the situation - plus I dont think i am good enough to pull it off even on 'lower ranked' players
It feels like I have gone from a player with low mechanical skill but decent game sense/strategy to the exact opposite and these types of losses are particularly frustrating where sometimes it feels like I have no good options.
TL:DR... what is the correct play if i (as position 1 or 2) have a solid net worth lead but my other cores are behind and insist on catching up by jungling? Are there heroes that I can play or strategies that I can employ to try to mitigate this situation?
Thanks and appreciate the help
submitted by
justicebeaver83 to
TrueDoTA2 [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 00:04 88Adison22 “Kellon ye3ni Kellon”, but it doesn’t mean all are the same and equal.
I am against the whole political spectrum, and I agree with Kellon ye3ni Kellon as long as it doesn’t make all parties and factions equal, especially when it comes to Hezbollah.
-Walid Jumblatt for example: He’s one of the most corrupt in the country, a very wealthy “feudal lord” type of mafia person, with a tarnished bloody history being a warlord during the civil war.
-Nabih Berri: Jumblatt’s close friend, they share many similarities. Berri is probably the richest “pure politician” in the country, all coming from corruption. Berri takes the country hostage to fulfil Hezbollah’s agenda, like when he closed the parliament for two years because Hezb wanted Aoun as a president. He has a small armed militia that he uses against civilians, May 7th 2008 and Oct 17 protests are examples. His party is one of the most corrupt too.
-Michel Aoun & Bassil: Corrupt to the core, some of the worse politicians the middle east has known. Bassil is a joke in the world of politics, even in a region where corruption is very common, Bassil stands out as a unique clown in the show. A serial liar, a man with no honour or values, he would make a deal with the devil if that granted him some political seat. Tens of billions of $$ of the population savings wasted by their party on failed projects.
-Saad Hariri: another massively corrupt man with a corrupt party, man with no values, no manners no self respect. His father gets killed, he goes on to make deals with the killers, May 7th 2008 happens, few days later he goes to kiss and greet Nasralla after Doha accords. The #2 clown of the show and a serial liar too. His party, just like the FPM, had the Lion’s share of projects given by the government. Wasted billions of our money to enrich themselves. Glad he’s gone but I hope for a day when we bring him back for trials.
-Samir Geagea: presents himself as the saviour of Lebanon and the only one reliable to stand against Hezbollah. Yet he’s no different than Saad Hariri, only difference is level of corruption and wasting public funds. Geagea is a liar, a war criminal, and a person that loves power, just like the rest. If that demanded a deal with Hezbollah and Bassil, he would gladly do it. Most of his party are the same, esp the senior ones. They have no clear vision nor straight values, it was evident بالتعيينات باللجان النيابية. Their whole story is based on opposing Hezbollah, which proves they don’t have much to offer other than empty words.
-Hezbollah on the other hand, is very different. To begin with, they were founded by a foreign entity, the IRGC in the Bekaa valley in the early 1980s. Since their first day, they operated as a foreign brigade of the IRGC, conducting attacks in Kuwait for example, hijacking airplanes in the region, bombing embassies and kidnapping western foreign civilians. Have you wondered why Mustafa Badreddine was detained in Kuwait for many years after being accused of terrorist attacks there? I guess it wasn’t about defending Lebanon from Israel. Hezbollah for instance, is the strongest armed militia in the world, by far. It’s even much more capable than many european armies, they boast huge warfare experience, collected from years of conflicts in southern Lebanon, Beirut, Syria, Iraq, Yemen, Kuwait and even Ukraine recently. They are armed with near 150,000 missiles and thousands of drones from Iran. A state which is in conflict with the majority of the world and been so for decades, one of the most isolated and most sanctioned and hated regimes. It’s beyond my understanding that people would consider Hezbollah equal to other parties in Lebanon. I would need pages to write about what Hezbollah did in Lebanon and abroad, spanning from the Gulf to Europe to Africa and all the way to the Americas. Not to mention corruption, brutal authoritarianism, political assassinations, terrorist attacks abroad, money laundering, global drugs trafficking etc…
We literally got our country destroyed in 2006 after going to a war with Israel to free some imprisoned folks that went later on to die fighting in Syria for Bashar!
Let alone the IQ levels of Nasrallah, we have the worst financial and economical crisis and this genius proposes that we plant potatoes and sell to Iraq and Syria, and other day he figures out the 1kg of onions sells for 80,000 and thinks it’s a great idea to plant onions. Just kill me already
To put it simply: Hariri, Jumblatt, Berri, Bassil, Mikati, Geagea and the rest are mostly a Lebanese issue and problem which is common in many corrupt countries like Lebanon. Hezbollah is a Lebanese, Regional and International problem, and one that is very uncommon in the world’s history.
submitted by
88Adison22 to
lebanon [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 00:03 bcatrek Confused/Disappointed on accessibility options (desktop)
Hi there! Having bought the steam deck recently, I am super thrilled to be able to game on such an excellent hardware! However, I am also keen to use the Firefox browser from time to time in desktop mode.
Fiddling around with the options in desktop mode. however, my eyes start to hurt within minutes.
All font sizes are very small, in menus, in icons, within the browser window, within the settings, windows, et cetera. Button sizes on top of windows, for closing windows, or minimising windows are also small.
And I find the touchscreen to be clunky, as I always need to point slightly above where I want the click to register. Is this a common problem btw?
Anyway, within the settings menu, the font options only seem to apply to text within the settings windows. The button size settings also seem to only apply for the settings windows.
When I change the button sizes for “windows“, it doesn’t change button sizes for the Firefox browser window, for example. As for text underneath icons, I found no way to change text size at all.
Now, I am new to the steam deck and I’m sure I’m missing some functionalities or settings, and I’d be delighted to learn about how to make desktop mode in particular more user friendly.
My eye sight is not what it used to be, a problem many 40-45+ gamers recognise I’m sure.
Is there any tutorials or guides to solve the problems I’m describing? Any quick fix?
Thanks in advance!
submitted by
bcatrek to
SteamDeck [link] [comments]