Can bearded dragons eat banana peels

Jerry and the Apocalypse: Part 60

2023.03.30 20:27 MjolnirPants Jerry and the Apocalypse: Part 60

Part 59
Lieutenant General Marcus Stanley, United States Army
Marcus stomped into the TOC. One of the gods was already there, the naked black woman. He racked his brain for a second to remember her name.
"Vintress, right?" he asked as he approached her, leaning over a folding table with a map spread out on it. Little glowing figures moved slowly about it; fist-sized knots of tentacles, and little pinpricks with arms and legs. The red-glowing ones, including the primordials themselves, were moving forward, while the green-glowing figures moved back.
"Yes, General," Vintress said.
"What's going on?" he asked.
"The primordials have rallied. They are pushing us hard, regaining ground we had taken back. I am observing now, to see their strategy, and seek a weakness."
"Anything jumping out yet?"
"No," Vintress said, and Marcus could hear her grinding her teeth. "They have become inexplicably smarter. And tougher. We have yet to kill one today."
"Let's hope that it disorganizes them as much as usual, then," Marcus said, though he doubted that would be the case. Not for any specific reason, it was just that that was the sort of thing that often changed when plans went sideways.
"We will soon find out," Vintress said. "Look."
Marcus followed her pointing finger to a gold-glowing figure. Marcus squinted, then put on his reading glasses and leaned over the map. It was the honor god, the one who'd tried to stop the vigilante and gotten his hand chopped off for his troubles.
"Tyndale, is it?" Marcus asked.
"Tysrane," Vintress corrected. "Yes," Marcus said. "Sorry, I've always been bad with names."
"Names are both trivial and deeply personal," Vintress said. Marcus glanced at her, meeting her eyes without sweeping her nude form with practiced ease.
"My name, Vintress, it literally means 'huntress' in a long lost language of a tribe I once favored. I adopted it to reflect my position when I acquired my domain. Prior to that, my name was Clisenryr. Do you know what that means?"
"I do not," Marcus said, playing along.
"It meant 'the angry one'."
Marcus eyed her with a blank expression, wondering where she was going.
"I do so enjoy watching this," she said, turning her eyes back to the map. Marcus followed her gaze just in time to see Tysrane turn into a streak that passed through one of the primordials. The creature exploded, and a hush fell over everyone in the TOC who wasn't glued to another screen or desk. Two seconds passed, and then the sound hit them.
A muted, basso crack echoed through the air. The loose fabric of the tent fluttered and Marcus felt the table and ground shaking for just an instant.
Marcus watched as the tiny, glowing primordial rained down around the battlefield as chunks, the largest chunk still in place, deflating and tumbling away.
"Heh," he said. "Rolling away like a booger on a greased pan."
Vintress squinted at him. "Is that a common idiom among your people?" she asked. Marcus laughed out loud. "No, it's just what came to mind when I saw it."
"Good," Vintress said. "It would raise disturbing questions if it was." Marcus couldn't help but agree with that one.
"They're not faltering," he said after a moment. The red enemies were still assaulting the green positions.
"Your men are holding their own," Vintress said. Marcus nodded. "Damn straight. Those are most experienced warfighters, and each position has at least one Spec Ops boy in it. Most have half an A-team. They're going to be punching well above their weight, and that, my friend, is indeed a common idiom."
"Yes, since we left you to your own devices, you have been consistently performing well above our own expectations of you."
Her tone was off. It sounded almost worried. Marcus eyed the goddess for a moment, letting his eyes slip down from her face to take in the set of her shoulders, her pose, the tension in her chest and stomach. There was a lot going on in her head. She was afraid, and not just of this new push by the primordials.
Marcus reached into his pocket and grabbed the heavily-encrypted phone there. It was a Blackberry, based on a model more than two decades old, but full of modern guts, including a tiny transmitter with about fifteen miles of range. His thumb brushed the built in keypad, finding and pressing buttons by feel.
Command Sergeant Major Eric Hale, 5th Special Forces Group
Hale stomped his way from one fighting position to the next, the incoming hail of spines apparently balking at the terrifying expression on his grizzled face, and refusing to come anywhere near him.
At least, that was the impression he hoped to give the men watching him. The truth was, his butthole was puckered so goddamn tight you couldn't pound a needle in it with a jackhammer.
He got to the forward-most position, two M2HBs, one of which was crewed only by two dead bodies, their helmets shattered by the spines.
"They're shooting back, sarge!" the assistant gunner said as he crouched down and pulled the bodies away from the gun.
"Yeah, the enemy tends to do that," Hale said with practiced nonchalance. He checked the gun, made sure it was in working order, then cleared the barrel with a two-round squeeze before settling down into a shooting position. He looked at the assistant gunner's nametape.
"Martinez, you're gonna have to assist both of us, right?"
Martinez checked the ammo in Hale's gun, then in the other.
"Pace your shots to Jeff," he said, hooking a thumb at his buddy on the other gun. "You've got about twice as much ammo left in the can as him. I'll keep you reloaded."
Hale nodded and aimed down the sites. He began to return some hate back to the senders, tearing apart spider crabs and shambling zombies with every round. He didn't notice the encrypted phone in his pocket buzzing.
Both gunners concentrated on the spider crabs, who were the ones who'd learned to shoot back. They spat the spines out of their mouths in short bursts. Their aim was shit, but there was enough of them that it didn't matter.
Hale emptied his can and let Martinez fit a new one. "Only one more can, Sarge," Martinez said. "And Jeff's up next." Hale nodded and focused on killing the spider crabs.
The ammo didn't last nearly as long as he'd have liked. He ran dry and unhooked the can. "That's it," he said as he folded up the bipod and grabbed the heavy gun by the carry handle.
"As soon as you're out, I want you to fall back to the rally point and rearm. Sergeant Lewis will show you where to set up, next. Huah?"
"Huah!" Martinez shouted as Jeff ran dry. Martinez quickly got his cans swapped and Jeff resumed shooting. Hale turned and began to make his way back. The rain of spines seemed to have actually gotten worse.
He threw the notion of striking an intimidating figure to the wind and hustled back to the rally point, dropping the weapon off at the stack. First Sergeant Lewis walked up.
"Lewis," Hale said. "Send two guys up to FP Echo to pick up a couple bodies, then try to find someone to man this gun."
"I'll do what I can, Top," Lewis said. "Lot of losses today."
"Relatively," Hale pointed out. From what he'd seen, they were standing at about one and a half percent casualties, and that included the wounded, who were being treated magically and sent back within hours of coming off the line.
"Yeah, but you know that still affects morale," Lewis pointed out.
Hale nodded and reached in his pocket to check his phone. "Shit," he swore as he saw the message.
"Can I help?" Lewis asked. Hale thought about it, then turned the screen to let him read it.
Gods r scared of us, might turn. b prpred
"Shit," Lewis said.
"Spread the word," Hale told him with a sigh. "I can't imagine a worse time to get this news, so naturally, this is when it happens. Get someone down to the clinic to get our boys rushed through and get the docs out and into the MASH tents. Have word sent back to camp to get everybody out of those standing-doorway rooms and into barracks tents. I was everyone in their battle rattle and carrying their weapon, and I mean everyone. Cooks, techs, logi boys... Every fucking one."
"Right," Lewis said with a nod. "Anything else?"
"Yeah, pray this is just the General being paranoid."
"Pray to who?" Lewis asked.
"Good fucking point," Hale said, clapping him on the shoulder. "Go on, I gotta go find the Colonel."
Hale stomped off towards the HQ tent as Lewis jogged away. He found Colonel Stanislaw leaning over a radio console with headphones on.
"...that's right, Major. We're splitting out from the magic fuckers. One second, my Top's here now." The Colonel covered his mouthpiece with one hand and slipped one of the speakers off his ears.
"Did you see the General's message?" Stanislaw asked. Hale nodded. "I sent Lewis to get our people out of their facilities and get everyone armed."
"Good. I'll issue orders to the officers to let you and Lewis lead the way. But right now, I need to discuss strategy. Let me wrap this up."
"Major," he said, unhanding the mic. "Major, I've put Top and Sergeant Lewis in charge of the prep. Spread word to the officers to defer to them on this. Yes, that's right. Damn straight, they are. Good. Report back to me in, let's say, ninety minutes. Good. Stanislaw out."
He pulled the headphones off. "Walk with me, Top."
Hale fell into step beside the Colonel and they walked out of the camp. When they'd gotten far enough away, they stopped.
"What are your initial thoughts?" the Colonel asked.
Hale frowned. "Not good, sir. They can do all kinds of tricky shit with their magic that we can't counter. From what I hear, we can strike back, but it won't be easy. With over twenty of them still here, I don't think there's enough of us to stand."
"We don't really have a choice," Stanislaw said. "We can't let these primordials get past us, or the whole world is done for."
"Then I say we concentrate everything right around the FHQ, sir. We'll have the docs set up at the aid station, have the men break down a couple of the tents. Motor pool and cavalry staging is going to be a bitch to move on short notice, but we'll get it done."
"I know you will. I need to go find Major Danvers, work out placement for the cavalry if we have to fall back. Go ahead and get started prepping."
"Yes, sir," Hale said, snapping the Colonel a salute. Stanislaw saluted back, and Hale jogged off. As he approached the HQ, a humvee pulled up and two men climbed out. Hale recognized the General's bodyguards right away. Both were large, bearded men in DADPAT, with backwards-turned baseball hats and gucci-ed out M4s. They emerged and began prowling around the area before one of them clicked his radio, said something and then walked over to Hale.
"Eric," he said as he approached.
"Hey, Jim," Hale replied. "Colonel just ran off to talk to Danvers about cavalry placement in case this emergency happens."
Jim nodded. "Fucked up shit," he said. Hale nodded back. General Stanley stepped out of the vehicle, spotted Hale and walked over. Hale came to attention and saluted. Stanley saluted back casually, "As you were, Sergeant. Did you see my message?"
"I did, sir, as did the Colonel. Preparations are already under way. If you need to talk to the Colonel, he's on his way to Major Danvers as we speak."
"I'm actually here to talk to you, Top," Stanley said. "I've got a job for you."
"Whatever you need, sir. I should inform you that the Colonel has asked me to oversee the transfer of equipment and personnel from the allied facilities to our own and the consolidation of our forces here."
"I'll step in to handle that personally, Eric. You remember a fellow named Bill Martin?"
Hale nodded. Bill and he had served together. He know Bill was a solid soldier and a holy terror in close quarters.
"Well, Bill's one of the executives at the DCM Group. I want you to take Jim and Mac with you, head back earthside and get with him. Tell him about our concern here and find out what kinds of resources they can spare. I've got six million budgeted for expenses, and I'll drop every dime of it on them if they can provide enough support to help us survive a two-front war out here.
"After you're done with that, I want you to go see the man himself and explain the situation to him. You tell him I said the following, verbatim. 'Sir, if this shit goes down and we don't throw everything we have at it in one big mass, right off the bat, I do not think we will survive'. You tell him those exact words, and that I mean it. I've already called in an appointment for you at three PM local time. Don't worry about getting there on time, just make sure you get it all done."
"Sir, yes, sir," Hale said, snapping another salute. Though he could barely believe it, the pucker factor was even higher than it had been walking out to that gun position.
Stanley saluted back, far more crisply than usual. He turned to his bodyguard. "You heard me, Jim," Jim nodded and stepped over next to Hale. "Ready when you are, Top."
Nate, the General's other bodyguard, wandered over. "We set?" he asked. Hale and Jim both nodded.
"Take my transport," Stanley said. "And get back here as soon as you're done."
They climbed into the Humvee and took off.
Bill Martin, President of Physical Security, Divine Crisis Management Group
Bill looked up as the door opened to reveal Julie. She looked haggard and run down.
"You look amazing," he said as soon as the door closed. He made sure his voice sounded sincere. Julie smiled and walked right over to sit on his lap and lay her head on his shoulder.
"Thank you," she said. "I feel like I'm being torn in a million directions. And I just got more bad news."
"What's that?"
"Jerry's gone radio silent. I got in touch with Michelle Vasquez, and she told me he's run off to kill the goddess who took his family."
"Shit," Bill muttered. He waited a beat before adding. "I can't really blame him, though."
"Except he was supposed to be tracking down the escapees," Julie said.
"The man's lost his family. He's wild with grief, right now. And truth be told, if he manages to kill her, that's not exactly a bad thing."
Julie lifted her head to meet Bill's eyes. "Are you defending a revenge quest?" she deadpanned.
"No, just pointing out that this one is advantageous. It's liable to produce a more positive outcome than him returning the escapees."
Julie sighed. Everybody was turning on her over the issue of Jerry. And then she sighed again, because Bill was still Bill.
"I'm gonna lock that door," she said. "Because I need to unwind."
Bill frowned in confusion. "What are you going to-" he stopped as the light came on in his eyes, making Julie smirk. "Ahh, I get it. What the hell, I mean, you're the boss, right?"
Julie stood and locked the door, then turned towards Bill and began unbuttoning her shirt. "I used to never understand people who got a thrill out of risking getting caught," she said as she peeled her shirt off and reached back to unhook her bra.
"But I think I'm starting to get it. It's the relief of getting away with it," she said, dropping her bra on the floor. Bill stared in fascination, the sight of her stripping easily the most alluring thing he'd ever seen. She unzipped the side of her skirt and then peeled it off to reveal a set of garters and a hard-on.
"You uh," Bill said, the words difficult to find as his mind focused on the imagery. "You planned for this.. Uh, this morning?"
Julie smiled and walked back to him, loosening his tie. "I stopped wearing underwear when we started dating," she said as she pulled it out of his collar. Bill put his hands on her hips and leaned forward to kiss her ribs, just below the solar plexus, where it always made her gasp.
Her gasp came at the same instant that Bill recognized the sound of someone pounding on the door.
"Shit!' he cursed. He looked around for a second, shooting to his feet. "Get under the desk, quick!"
Julie crawled under the desk and Bill moved to the door, kicking her discarded clothes behind a potted plant. Right as he opened the door, he cursed himself for not kicking them to her.
Three men immediately walked in, pressing past him. Two were in DADPAT and armed, the third in a set of ACUs with a CSM's stripes. Bill blinked as he recognized the Sergeant.
"Eric? Eric Hale?" he asked.
Eric stuck out his hand. "Hey Bill, been a long time." Bill shook his hands. "Yeah, it has. Who are your friends?"
"General Stanley's bodyguards. Jim and Nate. They're solid."
Bill held out a hand to each, who shook it with a respectful nod.
"So what brings you here?" Bill asked. He stepped over to his desk and sat down behind it, careful not to trod on Julie. She immediately slid a hand up his inner thigh and he struggled to maintain his composure. Eric took a seat while the two bodyguards stood.
"I need to hire as much magical muscle as I can for six million dollars, as fast as possible."
Bill frowned. Julie let go of him. "What for?"
Eric glanced around meaningfully. Bill nodded at the door, which one of the bodyguards closed, then he pressed his fingers to the rune inscribed on the right corner of his desk.
"Total privacy," he said.
"We have reason to believe the gods may turn on us," Eric stated.
"Holy shit," Bill said.
"Hell of an understatement," one of the bodyguards rumbled. Bill thought it was Jim. "You must have been a ranger."
"I was," Bill confirmed. "Shit, we're spread pretty thin right now. Wizards are mostly out levitating ruined buildings and healing injured people. This is some serious shit, though."
"Don't ask me why, I don't know. But Stanley's behind this, and I trust the old man's judgement."
Bill nodded. He remembered Stanley back when he was a full-bird Colonel. He'd been a solid, brilliant and trustworthy officer back then.
"I'll start making calls. I've got to hold some back, but I think I can round up about a hundred or so for you. You want extra shooters?"
"With magic guns?"
"Magic guns, armor, uniforms, gear... The works."
"Yes, very much."
"I can get you eighty before you leave the office. Another hundred and sixty in a couple of hours, and two hundred more by tomorrow."
Eric nodded. "How much?" he asked.
"Not a dime!" Julie said from under the desk. The three visitors all jumped. Bill rolled his chair back as Julie stood. Despite her state of undress (and Bill was relieved to see that she wasn't aiming any anatomy around any more) and the bags under her eyes, she managed to project a regal, businesslike air.
"We'll work up a bill after the fact for expenses," Julie clarified. "And we'll present it to the feds. I know the General's budget was to be used for supplies. If the gods are turning on us, they'll need to spend that money. And before you three go, you can all head down to the armory and get geared up. There's a quartermaster who can tell you how it all works."
"Thank you, Ma'am," Eric said, standing up and carefully keeping his eyes on Julie's face.
"Thanks," Jim added.
"Awesome, sir," Nate said. The room went quiet as Bill narrowed his eyes at the bodyguard. Eric turned to glare at him as well, and Jim shook his head slowly. Nate frowned in confusion, then his eyes widened.
"My apologies, Ma'am," he said quickly. "I just... I don't... I mean, I didn't mean anything by it. I'm cool with, I mean, it's none of my business, I don't-"
"Enough," Bill snapped. "Slip of the tongue. You're good. Just go get geared up. There will be a team waiting for you in the lobby in thirty minutes."
He turned to his computer and began to type quickly, issuing the orders to assemble as many as they could. He pointedly did not meet Nate's eyes, because he didn't want to lose his temper.
Julie ushered them out.
"I'm really sorry, Ma'am, I swear I didn't mean anything..." Nate stammered as they left. Julie patted his shoulder and closed the door, turning back to Bill.
"Orders are sent," Bill said. Julie gave him a funny look, which Bill couldn't interpret. He decided to assume the worst.
"He started apologizing and making excuses before I could even figure out how best to threaten him-" Bill started to say defensively, but Julie threw her head back and laughed.
After a moment, Bill's face cracked into a smile and he joined her.
"Well, that was ironic," Julie managed to wheeze as she walked back and began to unbutton Bill's shirt. "But since we got caught anyways... Hehe, we might as well enjoy it."
submitted by MjolnirPants to JerryandtheGoddesses [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 20:15 a15minutestory [WP] You are a student in the most prestigious magic academy in the kingdom. No one knows how you got in, sure you have amazing magic potential, but you’re “magic blind” meaning you can only feel the presence of magic and not see any magic. [Part 67]

Life, for most, was a series of ups and downs. You fail your test but then your mom makes your favorite dish for dinner. You lose the big game for your team, but then you make a major breakthrough in the spell you've been practicing for weeks. You drop your ice cream, but find some cash in your pocket you didn't remember leaving there.
The girl you've been fawning over for weeks tickles your tonsils with her tongue, but then you're cut in half and enslaved by your nation's mortal enemy.
Yeah, my life was different, there was no doubt about that at all. But the lowest lows made even the slightest highs feel so much higher. Something as simple as eating a hot meal was the height of life when you had been living on crackers, stale bread, and nearly century-old dried meat.
We failed to notice that everyone in the restaurant was staring at us as we wolfed down plate after plate. The juices; the flavors; the tenderness of the meat; the softness of the hot bread smothered in butter. I couldn't stop smiling as I ate.
"You gotta try this," Tovin said breathlessly between bites as he passed me a bowl containing what looked like some kind of wet, shredded, colorful salad. I swallowed the big bite of steak I had been chewing and quickly put a spoonful of the mystery dish in my mouth. It was heaven on earth.
"Holy smokes, what is this?" I asked.
"I think it's the coleslaw, give it back," he said, pulling the bowl right out of my hand. I turned and looked at the dumbfounded waiter standing next to our table, and smiled. "More coleslaw, please! And ribs, I'm outta ribs! And a refill on... what was this called?"
He stared wide-eyed at my plate and then shook his head as though clearing his mind. "Uhh, I believe you were having the peach lemonade, sir."
"That!" I pointed my fork at him before turning back to the assortment of delicacies splayed out before me. I wasn't sure if it was because I hadn't had a proper meal in weeks, or if it was just that the empire knew how to eat, but it was the best food I had ever tasted in my life.
"So good," Tovin said in such a way that I had to check and make sure he wasn't crying.
After eating all that we wanted and all that we could, the two of us just sat slouched in our chairs with bulging stomachs. I lifted my hand shakily toward the last rib on my plate, but let it fall to my side as I closed my eyes and accepted defeat. The will was there but the room in my stomach wasn't.
"My goodness, sirs," said the waiter. "You hunters sure can eat."
I looked up at him with a satisfied grin, "Hard work always makes a meal so much better. Know what I'm saying?"
"Can't argue with that," said the waiter as he folded his hands. "But... if I may, could I politely ask you to pay your bill? I mean no offense, but you and your friend have a..." he cleared his throat. "Musk about you."
I looked at Tovin and then at myself, and then at all the empty tables around us. We were still covered in the calraven's dried wing gunk. I had to have gone completely nose-blind to it. Now the faces everyone had been making at us made a lot more sense. I looked down to see that it had been flaking off of us and onto the restaurant floor.
"Oh man, I'm so sorry," I apologized.
"No!" said the man, holding his hands out. "It was an honor to serve the hunters keeping our cities safe, don't take me the wrong way. It would be our pleasure to serve you again, but it's about to be 5'o clock and our dinner rush will be starting soon."
I suddenly remembered something I had completely forgotten. I looked up at the man, "Excuse me, do you have a pencil?"
"Certainly," he answered, pulling one from his apron and setting it down on the checkered tablecloth. "Your bill will be 22 octims."
"That's so much," Tovin groaned, not bothering to lift his head or open his eyes. He wasn't wrong, but we had ordered almost everything on the menu. I wasn't completely certain I could walk correctly when it was time to leave. I pulled out the envelope and handed him 25 octims.
"Keep the change," I said, Tovin groaning quietly in tacit disapproval.
"Th-thank you!" said the waiter with a wide grin.
"In return, I'm keeping the pencil," I added, smiling back.
x - - x - - x - - ★ - - x - - x - - x
It didn't take long for us to find an inn. Bronzegirder was full of them, as it was apparently a booming industrial hub rife with people traveling on business. We decided to book one room with two separate bedrooms to save a bit of money. It came out to 9 octims a night, which when you factored in food, meant we only had a little over a week's worth of cash if we spent conservatively. I didn't know how long it was going to take me to find Atlas and Axle, but I couldn't see it happening that soon. We would likely have to hunt again; that or find a steady job that paid the bills.
It was a humble inn compared to some of the others we had seen. I really wanted to stay in one of the nicer ones, but Tovin wasn't having it. He said the less we had to go out and make money, the better, and I couldn't come up with a good enough argument to push back. While Tovin took a shower, I took an eraser to everything Fena had written to me in the notebook. I left a little bit of her message so as to avoid suspicion, and decided I'd write back later tonight before bed.
After his shower, he realized that he only had dirty clothes to change into and we were reminded that we needed to go shopping. I rinsed off and the two of us made our way back down to the lobby and out into town. It had gotten considerably darker since we had checked in, and the chill winds blew against my cold hair, sending shivers down my spine. We pulled our hoods up and hit the market.
The first shop we landed at was a big success. We bought a warm hat for Tovin's head, which was only just now growing back a thin layer of hair. We found some sheepskin flight jackets with wool collars that rode high against the back of our necks. Tovin begrudgingly accepted them as the best option both for warmth and for hiding our slave tattoos, but for me, I also thought they looked really, really cool.
We bought some leather gloves that matched the jackets, along with new undergarments and sleep attire. We bagged some Diesillian snacks and drinks, as well as a refill of cigarettes for Tovin before heading back to the room. We were both exhausted, and I was more excited about a bed than I ever had been. Back in the room, we sat on the floor and tried the different candies and snacks as we discussed our next plan of action.
"Let's stay here for a little while," Tovin advised, sitting under the open window with his cigarette in hand. "This place is huge. The odds of them finding us here quickly are slim."
"I agree," I said as I popped one of the candies in my mouth. "I'm not going to say I like it here, but it sure beats being on the run."
"We're still on the run," he warned. "Don't misunderstand that. We should also probably pick new aliases. DuPonte has the wrong ones, but Gilliam is pretty similar to William."
"Yeah, but we're not on the run, run. Y'know, being chased through the night, sleeping in abandoned shacks, and stowing away in train cars. I know they're still looking for us, but how are they ever gonna catch us now?"
He folded his arms and dropped his eyes. Smoke billowed from his mouth as he sat in quiet contemplation. "It would be a mistake to underestimate our enemy," he said finally. "We need to start going by new names. I'm Wallace, and you're Geoffrey, got that?"
"I don't want to be Geoffrey, you be Geoffrey," I said playfully as I passed him a bag of candies. "Here, try these. They're called jelly beans, they're pretty good."
He dug his hand into the bag, fished one out, and popped it into his mouth. "Fine," he said. "You can be Wallace then, and I'll be Geoffrey. You need to help me remember that, you understand?"
"Yeah, I got it," I assured him.
"I said I heard you, Jeez," I said dismissively as I picked up the dark beverage I had been eyeing. It was labeled Root Beer and it generated a golden fizz at the top when disturbed. I couldn't wait to taste it. Tovin reached over and gently lowered my hand. I looked up to find him staring at me intensely.
"Gill," he repeated. "Stop. Just stop it, alright? I know what you're doing. I might be slipping, but I'm not dumb, deaf, and blind just yet. While I appreciate the act, or at least where it's coming from, I know you're just as scared as I am. I'm not a child; and while I may not be able to preserve what remains of my dignity for very much longer, I would ask for your respect until that time comes."
I had somehow underestimated the smartest man I had ever known– again. I didn't know the extent of his condition. Based on our interactions, I figured that he had no memory of the times when he regressed. I assumed that he didn't fully understand how bad his lapses had gotten, but it seemed he did. Worse yet, I knew how he felt about sympathy. The way I was acting had to have felt like the biggest insult to him, and even so, he wasn't reacting with anger.
He just wanted to be heard.
"Earlier today in the woods," he said, lifting his arm and tapping his cigarette against the window sill. "I can't remember the details. I don't know how you did that monster in, how I ended up unconscious, or anything about how we got back to the city. But I do remember how I felt."
He traced the floorboards with his eyes and placed his arms on his knees as he looked for the words. "... I felt useless; helpless like a terrified child. At one point, I felt like I didn't deserve to be alive." He looked up at me. "It was like I was swimming in a dream; like I was watching my own actions from over my shoulder. I came back to consciousness for a brief moment and contemplated shoving that rifle in my mouth."
"Shut up," he waved at me dismissively, drawing tendrils of smoke in the air with the end of his cigarette. "I don't need your pep talk," he huffed. "I'm past it." He rested his head against the wall behind him. "I just want you to know that this whole thing is getting harder for me. It's like there are two people fighting for control of the wheel, and when I'm not steering, I'm in a sleeplike state. My thoughts play out in front of me like I'm having some kind of fever dream. They smear and melt like watercolor giving me brief glimpses of reality through a window I can't reach or jump through."
I stared at him with concern. We shared a brief moment of eye contact before he closed his eyes and exhaled smoke. "It's not looking good for me, Gill. I just wanted you to know before I went to bed," he said, getting to his feet. "That if I go to sleep tonight for the last time..."
"Hang on," I interrupted. "There's something you should know. I reached out to that friend of mine back home. He's already working on a way to fix you."
His face brightened. "Y-yeah?" he smiled. "Gill, why didn't you say anything?"
I picked up the bottle and used the opener we had purchased with it to pry the lid off. "There was never a good time," I shrugged. "It's been a long, long day."
"Well, what else did he say?" he asked, taking a step forward.
"... Just, y'know," I trailed off. "Hang in there."
He sucked his lips in and looked down at the floor. He knew I was holding back. I was more worried about putting him through information overload than anything else. There was a lot he didn't know; too much, in fact.
"Tovin, just trust me. You'll know everything soon," I assured him. "All of it. As soon as you get your memories back."
"You really think your friend is that incredible?" he asked without looking up.
I smiled knowingly. "I do."
I took a swig of the beverage and spat it back out all of my legs. It almost splashed his legs and he quickly scrambled away. He looked at me with apparent disgust.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?" he yelled.
"It's like medicine," I grimaced. "I don't think this is even a drink!"
x - - x - - x - - ☾ - - x - - x - - x
That night, as Tovin slept, I wrote down the events of the day. As I jotted it all down, I began having new revelations. Tovin seemed to be at his best after resting. In the morning when we got off the train, he seemed alright. However, as the day drew on, he became less and less like himself. I should have known something was up the moment he wandered off without me. Then he was acting like a literal child up to our confrontation with the calraven. He had even mistakenly called me dad, perhaps reliving a buried memory of a hunt with his father.
But when his rifle exploded and he lost consciousness, he was back to himself when he woke up. He seemed to hold strong through dinner up until he went to bed. I wondered what it was about sleeping that restored at least a portion of his working mind.
Then there was the stranger, referred to only once as "Deac." There was no mistaking the magic that glowed in his body, but what was that other energy? I couldn't see it, but for the fact that it danced with and often overtook his magic essence. There were two energies tangled up together inside of him, and they seemed to be at odds with one another. And then there was the Diesel Devil sitting at the back of the cave.
The two of them definitely knew one another on a familiar level. They had been sent together to investigate Eluviel, but why, and from where? She definitely didn't seem happy to see them, but could that have been because she felt I was threatened by them? A splinter-sprite, he called her. A piece of her consciousness that she had shed just before she was subdued.
I wondered why she'd chosen me. Was it because I could see her while others couldn't? Or maybe I was just secretly really, really awesome, like a main character in a novel. I sat under the electric light and smiled at the idea of being someone worthy of tales. Someone like Tovin or Atlas with a bright destiny. But was revenge really such a noble pursuit? The yearning to return home and lift some heads off of shoulders didn't seem like any sort of heroic journey. After I penned the events of the day as best as I could, I got to work answering everyone individually.
Tovin. Be nice to Gill. He's doing his best with what he's got. Instead of being pissed at him, be pissed at the headmasters in question for what they've done to him. I hope everything I wrote above helps in some way, but I'm still running around out here with a lot of questions. Any luck with the spell for your counterpart? As you;ve read, he's getting worse. I need that miracle cure sooner than later. Thanks for your help.
I could already hear him in my head. "I'm working as fast I can you ingrate," or something like that. I laughed under my breath as I thought about what a dick he was. It was pressure, pride, and maintaining appearances that warped his personality so much. Out here in the Diesel as a nobody with nothing to prove, he was so much more agreeable. His inner-Tovin showed through now and again, but I wondered what would happen if he suddenly got all his memories back. Would he be a more chilled-out version of his ENU counterpart, or would he be even more high-strung?
Gill. I hope you read the annotation I scribbled in the margins about not reading the whole journal entry. I forgot you had asked me not to talk about the Galgalim before I had already written it all down. If you skipped right to this response as I hoped, then don't go back and read any of that. There were major revelations about what she is and why she's here.
I knew he wouldn't be able to resist after reading that. I needed his curiosity to overpower his fear. It was possible, I figured, that I could undo some of the damage Vega had done. I just needed to remind Gill of who he was.
I know it's weird putting your trust in me, but if there's anyone you can trust, it's yourself. I'm 99% sure Tovin would back me up on that, haha. And yeah, I remember Fena boasting about the importance of keeping a diary. We love that girl, but we hate to write, am I write?
I hoped he would find my pun funny. He was me, so he would at least smile at it, I was sure.
Even now my hand is aching something fierce, I want to go to bed more than anything. You know how long its been since I've slept in a bed? This mattress feels like heaven under me right now, you got no idea. And is Tovin still threatening to kill you? I thought we had gotten a little closer than that. I can't believe Axle was expelled. You're right, that means you're probably next. Keep your head down, man. Thanks for cooperating with me. If you had changed the summoning signature for the tome, I would have died today... and yesterday too, actually. I'm getting actual combat experience out here. It's wild knowing you can die at any moment. My hand is kinda cramping and I still have to write Fena back so I'll end it here. Thanks again for hearing me out and staying open-minded about this whole thing.
I set the pencil down and massaged the muscle between my thumb and forefinger. I had a lot to tell. But I wasn't about to roll over and drift off without writing to Fena. I picked the pencil up and readjusted myself before putting my words down.
I'm sorry I asked Gill not to tell you, but something deep down inside of me told me he would do it anyway. I just wanted to touch base with him first before I reached out to the rest of you. And technically, I was the one who showed you the message in the tome, so I didn't actually ever keep a secret from you.
I doodled a little smiley face with his tongue sticking out and then quickly erased it only to find that I couldn't fully get it off the page. There was a big smudge there that made it evident that I'd written and then erased something. I let out a frustrated sigh and drew it again, but somehow worse.
That's a solid theory on Tovin there. Same for Atlas. That could end up coming back to bite Vega in the ass. I promise I'll be safe, but do me a favor and help Tovin with whatever it is he needs. He's working on that spell to untether blocked memories from the mind, and the Tovin with me is getting worse by the day it seems. I don't want to see him get caught and sent back to the camp. He won't cooperate with them and they'll definitely kill him.
Thanks for everything, hun. I miss you more than you could ever know. Promise me you'll stay safe too. I know Vega is trying to find a way to get to you. If he got to Tovin... look just take every precaution you can. I love you. Goodnight.
I closed the book and set it down on my bedside table. I pulled the chain on the light, snuffing it out, then turned over and sank my head into the pillow. It wasn't that late yet– I could hear the hum of Diesel vehicles and even the chatter of the populace outside. I pulled the blankets over myself and closed my eyes. I let the warmth of the bed cradle me as I counted my many blessings, and thanked Hahnahkordia that I had somewhere warm and dry to lay my head.
The room was dimly lit when I opened my eyes again. It was just bright enough that I could read the clock on the wall. It was about 7am. It felt like I had blinked. I thought about getting up, but the blankets were so warm, and the room was cold– I had left the window open all night by accident. What reason did I have to get out of bed anyways? I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep again and repeated this several times until the clock read noon and I started to get hungry.
I rolled out of bed and quickly closed the window. I hurried into the hot embrace of my morning shower and got dressed before knocking on Tovin's door. "Hey, you up? I was thinking of breakfast."
There was no answer. I carefully opened his door to find his bed empty and neatly made. I entered the room fully to find that his backpack was also missing. I figured he had to have gotten hungry first and left without me. That theory fell on its face when I ventured back to my room and found a note placed on the side table.
You can sleep all day if you want. I'm going down to the gun range at the hunters' office. I won't be shown up by you again.
I set the note down and began to worry. I didn't like the idea of him going out by himself. What if he were to suddenly backslide mentally while out in Diesel territory alone? I could see a scenario where he'd forget his alias or that he has an incriminating mark on the back of his neck. I got dressed in a hurry and grabbed my backpack before heading out the door. I hurried down the steps and out into the cold wet streets of Bronzegirder.
I made my way north of the crowded city streets and found Alloy street. The bitter winds blew against me as I made my way up the empty road toward the hunters' office. I was starting to regret not buying a warm hat for myself when I bought one for Tovin. I skipped every second step on my way up to the front door and made my way past the reception desk and into the firing range. I heaved a sigh of relief when I found Tovin shooting at targets downrange.
I walked up next to him as he turned his rifle over and grabbed a handful of ammunition from the box sitting on the counter. "Busy morning, Geoffrey?"
"Did you just wake up?" he asked as he began feeding bullets into the tube.
"I figured I didn't have anywhere to be," I shrugged. "I assumed you didn't either. I thought the plan was to get our bonus and ditch this place."
"Yeah, well, I kind of like shooting," he admitted. "Also, we're out of money."
I felt my knees turn to jelly underneath me. "What?" I yelled. "How?"
"Turns out these guns are expensive," he said as he pulled the hammer back and lifted the rifle to his shoulder. "You left ours out in the woods. They charged us for them."
I stammered for entirely too long before wiping both hands over my face and collecting myself. "... How much we got left?"
"We owe," he answered, firing his gun. "They charged us for the uniforms, and then a fee to clean the gunk off of them. Also, I bought us a pair of rain ponchos, they're cheaper here." He motioned to a couple of folded-up ponchos hanging over the wooden divider.
I stammered for a little longer. This was becoming more expensive than it was worth. We would have to hunt another monster today. I was hoping to never have to hoof it out there again, and it was even colder today than it was yesterday.
"Calm down," he said, not taking his eyes off the target. "Get your poncho on. I've got a plan."
"A plan?" I asked.
x - - x - - x - - ★ - - x - - x - - x
"The circus?" I said with a hint of anger in my voice as we stood in front of the many tents and attractions. They had set up east of town on the perimeter of the city. Families wandered the fairgrounds. Vendors had set up games and stands with delicious food we couldn't pay for, and I had just remembered I hadn't eaten breakfast.
"I came this way first when I smelled the food," Tovin said, taking a few steps in front of me and turning around. "Then I explored a little bit. And wouldn't you know it– I found an attraction that was offering a cash prize. It just wasn't open yet."
I sighed and hung my head. "You just wanted to come to the carnival," I grumbled.
"100 octims," he said flatly.
I looked up at him and he smiled faintly. "Thought that would get your attention." He reached into his pocket and produced a single red ticket. "This will get us one round."
"One round?" I asked, taking the ticket and inspecting it. It read, "Single Admission ~ 1 Minute."
"There's a stage toward the back with a guy in a cape that you can challenge in hand-to-hand combat," he said, beckoning me to follow as he turned and started into the fair. I hurried after him as he explained. "Here's the kicker though. You don't have to beat him. All you've got to do is hit him."
"Just hit him?" I asked.
"That's what they said. He's supposed to be some kind of master. You strike him just once and we're set for the next several days, and that's after settling our debt."
This plan was a little better than I had given him credit for. Here I had thought he'd gone bananas again, but this could really work.
"You think I can do it?" I asked. "It can't be easy if they're throwing around a hundred octims."
"Here's what I'm thinking," he said, lowering his voice and slowing down to walk next to me. "You use a little bit of that magic– the kind you isolate in your feet to move quickly."
"Are you nuts?" I cast him an incredulous glance. "Did you forget we'd be on stage in Diesel territory?"
"Just use it once quickly to make your swing a little faster," he reasoned. "It's been drizzling all morning. The stage is wet already. If you're quick about it, it won't stand out."
"I don't know," I shook my head. "It's not the worst plan, but it's so risky."
"Riskier than hunting monsters?" he asked.
That was a fair point. Still, the idea of casting in front of everyone made me uneasy. It wasn't like Jetstream was a super common spell, though. Furthermore, the odds were slim that anyone in the crowd had ever even witnessed magic before. The more I thought about it, the more I started to think we could actually pull this off.
"This is the place," said Tovin as we approached a crowd. There was a wooden sign in front that read, The Slippery Salamander! One hit gets you 100 octims! The two of us pushed through the crowd until we came to the stage where a mustached man was swinging like crazy at the aptly named Salamander. He bobbed and weaved effortlessly around every attempted strike until a man in a red and white striped outfit hurried out onto the stage and blew a whistle.
"Time's up!" he called out.
The crowd cheered and applauded as the Salamander turned and took a bow. The world fell out from underneath me. I couldn't believe my eyes.
Writing Prompt Submitted by u/My-Last-Hope
submitted by a15minutestory to A15MinuteMythos [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 20:13 Maryaliceanna I’ve decided that successfully calorie counting is an urban legend made up by lizards

So I used to count calories before I started recovering a year or two ago and from what I can remember around the same time I used to binge eat a lot and feel hungry CONSTANTLY. Now today I thought I’d subject myself to a little daunting (and questionable) experiment where I used a calorie counting app as my food diary for the day and tried to log my calories without much expectation…. When I tell you I got halfway through the day and suddenly broke down out of nowhere in a Starbucks because I was RANDOMLY so stressed and hungry I could fight and eat a fully grown horse!!! (I settled for a stress-eaten banana muffin instead thanks for asking). Now I’m at home and seriously considering topping that off with a balanced meal of an entire pizza. The thing is, I don’t normally count calories and I basically just don’t feel stressed out about food and rarely feel hungry throughout the day (I normally just drink a bunch of matcha until 3pm like a Health God). So I’ve decided that it’s an urban legend and that whoever decided calorie counting would make you lose weight was on mushrooms, because I can’t figure out how other people are tracking their calories and not instantly freaking out and throwing down a whole pizza. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk
submitted by Maryaliceanna to EDAnonymous [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 19:44 _LegioN7_ 34 [M4F] Michigan/Anywhere - Nerdy Guy LF Best Friend!

Hey everyone!
I'm 34, M, Chubby/Dad Bod, 6 Tattoos (I want more!), Bearded and 6'!
We all know how difficult it is when you hit 30+ to meet new people, find friends, and even more than that. Feel free to just message me even if you aren't looking for a relationship! I'd love some conversation throughout the day and to make new friends!

I'm just a nerdy guy looking for his best friend.
Are you looking for that consistent text-until-3am person? Do you like having conversation or knowing that I'll try my best to find something to chat about?
We can talk about British TV, or food. We can talk about your favorite concerts or bands. We can talk about how Mass Effect is the best video game series but the remaster was just okay. We can talk about news, or really anything.
Location isn't a huge deal breaker for me. I'm willing to eventually find someone regardless of the location if something happens.
I'm the kinda dude who will do the dishes if you cook, and help clean the house. I'll mow the lawn (we all know nobody wants too), and fix things.

About Me!

What I'm looking for
I'm all for meeting/hanging out in a video game if you want! Do you want a partner to play a co-op game with? Build something in a game? I'll definitely play!
You're welcome to message/reddit chat!
submitted by _LegioN7_ to R4R30Plus [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 19:37 _LegioN7_ 34 [M4F] Michigan/Anywhere - Nerdy Guy LF WoW Partner?

I'm 34, M, Chubby/Dad Bod, Tattoos, Bearded and 6'!
We all know how difficult it is when you hit 30+ to meet new people, find friends, and even more than that. Feel free to just message me to be friends! I'd love some conversation throughout the day.
I'm just a nerdy guy looking for his best friend.
Are you looking for that consistent text-until-3am person? Do you like having conversation or knowing that I'll try my best to find something to chat about?
We can talk about British TV, or food. We can talk about your favorite concerts or bands. We can talk about how Mass Effect is the best video game series but the remaster was just okay.
Location isn't a huge deal breaker for me. I'm willing to eventually find someone regardless of the location if something happens.

About Me!

What I'm looking for
I'm all for meeting/hanging out in a video game like World of Warcraft, or Fortnite to get to know each other. We can also just chat in Reddit Chat. We can chat on discord once I get to know you!
submitted by _LegioN7_ to r4r [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 19:31 100evo Chances of Shiryu team stealing df powers and zombifying Big mom and Kaido.

No Blackbeard crew appearing in Wano is pretty strange. Even Shanks went to Wano predicting Blackbeard might show up there but BB didn't show up.
My theory is that BB assigned Shiryu for Wano. Shiryu with his invisible power probably stayed low-key waiting the perfect moment to steal defeated Big Mom and Kaido bodies and their devil fruit powers. Moria might be with Shiryu or someone from BB already got Moria's shadow power after killing Moria. So, Shiryu team might zombify Big Mom and Kaido just like Moria did with Oars. Steal Soul Soul fruit and Azure Dragon fruit for BB crew to eat.
This way, BB can get two ex-yonkos bodies and powers at the same time which totally is a crazy easy way for power uping his crew. Wano raid was a perfect chance to steal strongest devil fruits and BB would never let this chance go, in my opinion.
What do you think?
submitted by 100evo to OnePiece [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 19:26 autotldr Fox host calls George Santos a liar to his face when he lies about never having heard of OnlyFans He made a crude joke about Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez having an OnlyFans in 2020. Now he's saying he never heard of the platform.

This is the best tl;dr I could make, original reduced by 48%. (I'm a bot)
In a humiliating moment for the gay New York Republican - if he's capable of feeling shame - a Fox Business host muttered under her breath that she thought Rep. George Santos "Just can't tell the truth" when he said that he only heard of OnlyFans several weeks ago.
Lisa Kennedy Montgomery - who just goes by "Kennedy" - asked Santos, "Is it true that you have an OnlyFans page and you can peel a banana with your feet?" OnlyFans is a content subscription service that's associated with adult content.
Santos started laughing and, instead of just playing the question off as a joke or saying "No," he decided to say that he had never heard of the massively well-known platform until a few weeks ago.
Of course, it's very hard to believe that Santos never heard of OnlyFans until three weeks ago considering he was joking about Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez having an OnlyFans page in early 2020.
"From what I understand, you're interested in AOC's OnlyFans account," Santos joked about the sitting Congresswoman.
On Twitter, people were surprised that Santos would go so far as to claim that he had never heard of OnlyFans and some even suggested that if he's lying about even knowing about the platform, it could be a sign that he's on it.
Summary Source FAQ Feedback Top keywords: OnlyFans#1 Santos#2 heard#3 weeks#4 ago#5
Post found in /politics, /politics, /worldpolitics, /politics, /Investigate_the_GOP, /politicyl and /politicly.
NOTICE: This thread is for discussing the submission topic. Please do not discuss the concept of the autotldr bot here.
submitted by autotldr to autotldr [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 18:46 BanannaAh Finally

Finally found someone willing to trade fruit noti
submitted by BanannaAh to bloxfruits [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 18:43 _Triple_ [STORE] 900+ KNIVES/GLOVES/SKINS, 50.000$+ INVENTORY. M9 Fade, M4 Poseidon, Kara Gamma, BFK Freehand, BFK Bright Water, Spec Gloves Kimono, Nomad Fade, M9 Doppler, Skeleton, BFK B.Steel, AWP Fade, Stiletto Fade, S.Gloves Slingshot, BFK Ultra, Kara Damas, Bayo Lore, Bayo Gamma, Flip Fade & A Lot More

Everything in my inventory is up for trade. The most valuable items are listed here, the rest you can find in My Inventory

Feel free to Add Me or even better send a Trade Offer. Open for any suggestions: upgrades, downgrades / knives, gloves, skins / stickers, patterns, floats.

All Buyouts are listed in cash value.


★ Butterfly Knife Freehand FN #1, B/O: $1867

★ Butterfly Knife Bright Water MW, B/O: $1098

★ Butterfly Knife Blue Steel BS, B/O: $907

★ Butterfly Knife Ultraviolet FT, B/O: $789

★ Butterfly Knife Stained FT, B/O: $695

★ Bayonet Tiger Tooth MW #1, B/O: $888

★ Bayonet Gamma Doppler (Phase 4) FN, B/O: $727

★ Bayonet Doppler (Phase 2) FN, B/O: $608

★ Bayonet Doppler (Phase 1) FN, B/O: $521

★ Bayonet Rust Coat BS, B/O: $253

★ Bayonet Night FT, B/O: $251

★ StatTrak™ Bayonet Lore MW, B/O: $751

★ Karambit Gamma Doppler (Phase 4) FN, B/O: $1343

★ Karambit Damascus Steel FT, B/O: $774

★ Karambit Rust Coat BS, B/O: $537

★ Karambit Boreal Forest FT, B/O: $488

★ M9 Bayonet Fade FN, B/O: $1523

★ M9 Bayonet Fade FN, B/O: $1523

★ M9 Bayonet Doppler (Phase 4) FN, B/O: $1008

★ M9 Bayonet Blue Steel FT, B/O: $534

★ M9 Bayonet Rust Coat BS, B/O: $449

★ Flip Knife Fade FN, B/O: $703

★ Flip Knife Gamma Doppler (Phase 1) MW, B/O: $509

★ Flip Knife Doppler (Phase 1) FN, B/O: $406

★ Flip Knife Freehand FT, B/O: $228

★ StatTrak™ Flip Knife Bright Water FN, B/O: $332

★ Falchion Knife Doppler (Phase 2) FN, B/O: $292

★ Falchion Knife Doppler (Phase 3) FN, B/O: $264

★ Falchion Knife Marble Fade FN, B/O: $258

★ Falchion Knife Bright Water MW, B/O: $133

★ Stiletto Knife Fade FN, B/O: $822

★ Stiletto Knife Slaughter FN, B/O: $569

★ Stiletto Knife Doppler (Phase 1) FN, B/O: $530

★ Stiletto Knife Crimson Web FT, B/O: $396

★ StatTrak™ Stiletto Knife Scorched FT, B/O: $172

★ Gut Knife Doppler (Sapphire) MW #1, B/O: $830

★ Gut Knife Fade FN, B/O: $204

★ Gut Knife Tiger Tooth FN, B/O: $138

★ Gut Knife Bright Water MW, B/O: $104

★ Gut Knife Freehand FT, B/O: $92

★ Gut Knife Urban Masked FT, B/O: $82

★ StatTrak™ Gut Knife Rust Coat BS, B/O: $93

★ Shadow Daggers Fade FN, B/O: $258

★ Shadow Daggers Doppler (Phase 3) FN, B/O: $165

★ Shadow Daggers Blue Steel FT, B/O: $82

★ Shadow Daggers Bright Water FT, B/O: $82

★ Shadow Daggers Blue Steel WW, B/O: $80

★ Shadow Daggers Rust Coat BS, B/O: $74

★ StatTrak™ Shadow Daggers Marble Fade FN, B/O: $186

★ Classic Knife Slaughter MW, B/O: $311

★ StatTrak™ Classic Knife Stained BS, B/O: $163

★ Talon Knife Slaughter MW, B/O: $605

★ Talon Knife Scorched MW, B/O: $290

★ Ursus Knife Marble Fade FN, B/O: $405

★ Ursus Knife Night Stripe MW, B/O: $162

★ Paracord Knife Stained WW, B/O: $125

★ Paracord Knife Forest DDPAT FT, B/O: $97

★ Paracord Knife Safari Mesh FT, B/O: $96

★ Navaja Knife Safari Mesh FT, B/O: $71

★ Navaja Knife Scorched WW, B/O: $71

★ Nomad Knife Fade FN, B/O: $1015

★ Skeleton Knife, B/O: $909

★ Bowie Knife Boreal Forest MW, B/O: $106

★ Survival Knife Forest DDPAT FT, B/O: $97


★ Driver Gloves Crimson Weave FT, B/O: $335

★ Driver Gloves King Snake BS, B/O: $270

★ Driver Gloves Lunar Weave WW, B/O: $113

★ Driver Gloves Overtake WW, B/O: $88

★ Driver Gloves Overtake BS, B/O: $67

★ Moto Gloves Transport MW, B/O: $171

★ Moto Gloves Polygon BS, B/O: $137

★ Moto Gloves Transport WW, B/O: $71

★ Moto Gloves 3rd Commando Company BS, B/O: $62

★ Specialist Gloves Crimson Kimono WW, B/O: $1027

★ Specialist Gloves Tiger Strike FT, B/O: $654

★ Specialist Gloves Mogul FT, B/O: $295

★ Specialist Gloves Lt. Commander FT, B/O: $277

★ Specialist Gloves Crimson Web FT, B/O: $275

★ Sport Gloves Slingshot FT, B/O: $796

★ Sport Gloves Amphibious BS #2, B/O: $699

★ Sport Gloves Omega FT, B/O: $656

★ Broken Fang Gloves Unhinged BS, B/O: $60


AK-47 Case Hardened BS, B/O: $130

AK-47 Bloodsport MW, B/O: $79

AK-47 Fuel Injector BS, B/O: $76

AK-47 Fuel Injector BS, B/O: $76

AK-47 Bloodsport FT, B/O: $70

AK-47 Neon Rider MW, B/O: $60

AWP Fade FN, B/O: $864


AWP Containment Breach FT, B/O: $69

AWP Containment Breach FT, B/O: $69

AWP Wildfire FT, B/O: $59

AWP Chromatic Aberration FN, B/O: $59

StatTrak™ AWP Hyper Beast FT, B/O: $65

StatTrak™ AWP Hyper Beast FT, B/O: $65

Desert Eagle Blaze FN, B/O: $565

Desert Eagle Blaze FN, B/O: $565

Desert Eagle Printstream FN, B/O: $155

Desert Eagle Cobalt Disruption FN, B/O: $58

M4A1-S Icarus Fell FN, B/O: $414

M4A1-S Printstream MW, B/O: $204

M4A1-S Printstream MW, B/O: $204

M4A4 Poseidon FN, B/O: $1402

M4A4 The Emperor FN, B/O: $152

M4A4 Asiimov WW, B/O: $97

USP-S Kill Confirmed MW, B/O: $65

USP-S Printstream FT, B/O: $69

StatTrak™ USP-S Kill Confirmed FT, B/O: $123

StatTrak™ USP-S Neo-Noir FN, B/O: $106

AUG Flame Jörmungandr FN, B/O: $218

P2000 Ocean Foam FN, B/O: $139

Souvenir SSG 08 Death Strike MW, B/O: $81

CZ75-Auto Emerald Quartz MW, B/O: $61

Trade Offer Link - Steam Profile Link - My Inventory

Knives - Bowie Knife, Butterfly Knife, Falchion Knife, Flip Knife, Gut Knife, Huntsman Knife, M9 Bayonet, Bayonet, Karambit, Shadow Daggers, Stiletto Knife, Ursus Knife, Navaja Knife, Talon Knife, Classic Knife, Paracord Knife, Survival Knife, Nomad Knife, Skeleton Knife, Patterns - Gamma Doppler, Doppler (Phase 1, Phase 2, Phase 3, Phase 4, Black Pearl, Sapphire, Ruby, Emerald), Crimson Web, Lore, Fade, Ultraviolet, Night, Marble Fade (Fire & Ice, Fake FI), Case Hardened (Blue Gem), Autotronic, Slaughter, Black Laminate, Tiger Tooth, Boreal Forest, Scorched, Blue Steel, Vanilla, Damascus Steel, Forest DDPAT, Urban Masked, Freehand, Stained, Bright Water, Safari Mesh, Rust Coat, Gloves - Bloodhound Gloves (Charred, Snakebite, Guerrilla, Bronzed), Driver Gloves (Snow Leopard, King Snake, Crimson Weave, Imperial Plaid, Black Tie, Lunar Weave, Diamondback, Rezan the Red, Overtake, Queen Jaguar, Convoy, Racing Green), Hand Wraps (Cobalt Skulls, CAUTION!, Overprint, Slaughter, Leather, Giraffe, Badlands, Spruce DDPAT, Arboreal, Constrictor, Desert Shamagh, Duct Tape), Moto Gloves (Spearmint, POW!, Cool Mint, Smoke Out, Finish Line, Polygon, Blood Pressure, Turtle, Boom!, Eclipse, 3rd Commando Company, Transport), Specialist Gloves (Crimson Kimono, Tiger Strike, Emerald Web, Field Agent, Marble Fade, Fade, Foundation, Lt. Commander, Crimson Web, Mogul, Forest DDPAT, Buckshot), Sport Gloves (Pandora's Box, Superconductor, Hedge Maze, Vice, Amphibious, Slingshot, Omega, Arid, Big Game, Nocts, Scarlet Shamagh, Bronze Morph), Hydra Gloves (Case Hardened, Emerald, Rattler, Mangrove), Broken Fang Gloves (Jade, Yellow-banded, Unhinged, Needle Point), Pistols - P2000 (Wicked Sick, Ocean Foam, Fire Element, Amber Fade, Corticera, Chainmail, Imperial Dragon, Obsidian, Scorpion, Handgun, Acid Etched), USP-S (Printstream, Kill Confirmed, Whiteout, Road Rash, Owergrowth, The Traitor, Neo-Noir, Dark Water, Orion, Blueprint, Stainless, Caiman, Serum, Monster Mashup, Royal Blue, Ancient Visions, Cortex, Orange Anolis, Ticket To Hell, Black Lotus, Cyrex, Check Engine, Guardian, Purple DDPAT, Torque, Blood Tiger, Flashback, Business Class, Pathfinder, Para Green), Lead Conduit, Glock-18 (Umbral Rabbit, Fade, Candy Apple, Bullet Queen, Synth Leaf, Neo-Noir, Nuclear Garden, Dragon Tatto, Reactor, Pink DDPAT, Twilight Galaxy, Sand Dune, Groundwater, Blue Fissure, Snack Attack, Water Elemental, Brass, Wasteland Rebel, Vogue, Franklin, Royal Legion, Gamma Doppler, Weasel, Steel Disruption, Ironwork, Grinder, High Beam, Moonrise, Oxide Blaze, Bunsen Burner, Clear Polymer, Bunsen Burner, Night), P250 (Re.built, Nuclear Threat, Modern Hunter, Splash, Whiteout, Vino Primo, Mehndi, Asiimov, Visions, Undertow, Cartel, See Ya Later, Gunsmoke, Splash, Digital Architect, Muertos, Red Rock, Bengal Tiger, Crimson Kimono, Wingshot, Metallic DDPAT, Hive, Dark Filigree, Mint Kimono), Five-Seven (Neon Kimono, Berries And Cherries, Fall Hazard, Crimson Blossom, Hyper Beast, Nitro, Fairy Tale, Case Hardened, Copper Galaxy, Angry Mob, Monkey Business, Fowl Play, Anodized Gunmetal, Hot Shot, Retrobution, Boost Protocol), CZ75-Auto (Chalice, Crimson Web, Emerald Quartz, The Fuschia is Now, Nitro, Xiangliu, Yellow Jacket, Victoria, Poison Dart, Syndicate, Eco, Hexane, Pole, Tigris), Tec-9 (Rebel, Terrace, Nuclear Threat, Hades, Rust Leaf, Decimator, Blast From, Orange Murano, Toxic, Fuel Injector, Remote Control, Bamboo Forest, Isaac, Avalanche, Brother, Re-Entry, Blue Titanium, Bamboozle), R8 Revolver (Banana Cannon, Fade, Blaze, Crimson Web, Liama Cannon, Crazy 8, Reboot, Canal Spray, Night, Amber Fade), Desert Eagle (Blaze, Hand Cannon, Fennec Fox, Sunset Storm, Emerald Jörmungandr, Pilot, Hypnotic, Golden Koi, Printstream, Cobalt Disruption, Code Red, Ocean Drive, Midnight Storm, Kumicho Dragon, Crimson Web, Heirloom, Night Heist, Mecha Industries, Night, Conspiracy, Trigger Discipline, Naga, Directive, Light Rail), Dual Berettas (Flora Carnivora, Duelist, Cobra Strike, Black Limba, Emerald, Hemoglobin, Twin Turbo, Marina, Melondrama, Pyre, Retribution, Briar, Dezastre, Royal Consorts, Urban Shock, Dualing Dragons, Panther, Balance), Rifles - Galil (Aqua Terrace, Winter Forest, Chatterbox, Sugar Rush, Pheonix Blacklight, CAUTION!, Orange DDPAT, Cerberus, Dusk Ruins, Eco, Chromatic Aberration, Stone Cold, Tuxedo, Sandstorm, Shattered, Urban Rubble, Rocket Pop, Kami, Crimson Tsunami, Connexion), SCAR-20 (Fragments, Brass, Cyrex, Palm, Splash Jam, Cardiac, Emerald, Crimson Web, Magna Carta, Stone Mosaico, Bloodsport, Enforcer), AWP (Duality, Gungnir, Dragon Lore, Prince, Medusa, Desert Hydra, Fade, Lightning Strike, Oni Taiji, Silk Tiger, Graphite, Chromatic Aberration, Asiimov, Snake Camo, Boom, Containment Breach, Wildfire, Redline, Electric Hive, Hyper Beast, Neo-Noir, Man-o'-war, Pink DDPAT, Corticera, Sun in Leo, Elite Build, Fever Dream, Atheris, Mortis, PAW, Exoskeleton, Worm God, POP AWP, Phobos, Acheron, Pit Viper, Capillary, Safari Mesh), AK-47 (Head Shot, Wild Lotus, Gold Arabesque, X-Ray, Fire Serpent, Hydroponic, Panthera Onca, Case Hardened, Vulcan, Jet Set, Fuel Injector, Bloodsport, Nightwish, First Class, Neon Rider, Asiimov, Red Laminate, Aquamarine Revenge, The Empress, Wasteland Rebel, Jaguar, Black Laminate, Leet Museo, Neon Revolution, Redline, Frontside Misty, Predator, Legion of Anubis, Point Disarray, Orbit Mk01, Blue Laminate, Green Laminate, Emerald Pinstripe, Cartel, Phantom Disruptor, Jungle Spray, Safety Net, Rat Rod, Baroque Purple, Slate, Elite Build, Uncharted, Safari Mesh), FAMAS (Sundown, Prime Conspiracy, Afterimage, Commemoration, Dark Water, Spitfire, Pulse, Eye of Athena, Meltdown, Rapid Eye Move, Roll Cage, Styx, Mecha Industrie, Djinn, ZX Spectron, Valence, Neural Net, Night Borre, Hexne), M4A4 (Temukau, Howl, Poseidon, Asiimov, Daybreak, Hellfire, Zirka, Red DDPAT, Radiation Hazard, Modern Hunter, The Emperor, The Coalition, Bullet Rain, Cyber Security, X-Ray, Dark Blossom, Buzz Kill, In Living Color, Neo-Noir, Desolate Space, 龍王 (Dragon King), Royal Paladin, The Battlestar, Global Offensive, Tooth Fairy, Desert-Strike, Griffin, Evil Daimyo, Spider Lily, Converter), M4A1-S (Emphorosaur-S, Welcome to the Jungle, Imminent Danger, Knight, Hot Rod, Icarus Fell, Blue Phosphor, Printstream, Master Piece, Dark Water, Golden Coil, Bright Water, Player Two, Atomic Alloy, Guardian, Chantico's Fire, Hyper Beast, Mecha Industries, Cyrex, Control Panel, Moss Quartz, Nightmare, Decimator, Leaded Glass, Basilisk, Blood Tiger, Briefing, Night Terror, Nitro, VariCamo, Flashback), SG 553 (Cyberforce, Hazard Pay, Bulldozer, Integrale, Dragon Tech, Ultraviolet, Colony IV, Hypnotic, Cyrex, Candy Apple, Barricade, Pulse), SSG 08 (Death Strike, Sea Calico, Blood in the Water, Orange Filigree, Dragonfire, Big Iron, Bloodshot, Detour, Turbo Peek, Red Stone), AUG (Akihabara Accept, Flame Jörmungandr, Hot Rod, Midnight Lily, Sand Storm, Carved Jade, Wings, Anodized Navy, Death by Puppy, Torque, Bengal Tiger, Chameleon, Fleet Flock, Random Access, Momentum, Syd Mead, Stymphalian, Arctic Wolf, Aristocrat, Navy Murano), G3SG1 (Chronos, Violet Murano, Flux, Demeter, Orange Kimono, The Executioner, Green Apple, Arctic Polar Camo, Contractor), SMGs - P90 (Neoqueen, Astral Jörmungandr, Run and Hide, Emerald Dragon, Cold Blooded, Death by Kitty, Baroque Red, Vent Rush, Blind Spot, Asiimov, Trigon, Sunset Lily, Death Grip, Leather, Nostalgia, Fallout Warning, Tiger Pit, Schermatic, Virus, Shapewood, Glacier Mesh, Shallow Grave, Chopper, Desert Warfare), MAC-10 (Sakkaku, Hot Snakes, Copper Borre, Red Filigree, Gold Brick, Graven, Case Hardened, Stalker, Amber Fade, Neon Rider, Tatter, Curse, Propaganda, Nuclear Garden, Disco Tech, Toybox, Heat, Indigo), UMP-45 (Wild Child, Fade, Blaze, Day Lily, Minotaur's Labyrinth, Crime Scene, Caramel, Bone Pile, Momentum, Primal Saber), MP7 (Teal Blossom, Fade, Nemesis, Whiteout, Asterion, Bloosport, Abyssal Apparition, Full Stop, Special Delivery, Neon Ply, Asterion, Ocean Foam, Powercore, Scorched, Impire), PP-Bizon (Modern Hunter, Rust Coat, Forest Leaves, Antique, High Roller, Blue Streak, Seabird, Judgement of Anubis, Bamboo Print, Embargo, Chemical Green, Coblat Halftone, Fuel Rod, Photic Zone, Irradiated Alert, Carbon Fiber), MP9 (Featherweight, Wild Lily, Pandora's Box, Stained Glass, Bulldozer, Dark Age, Hot Rod, Hypnotic, Hydra, Rose Iron, Music Box, Setting Sun, Food Chain, Airlock, Mount Fuji, Starlight Protector, Ruby Poison Dart, Deadly Poison), MP5-SD (Liquidation, Oxide Oasis, Phosphor, Nitro, Agent, Autumn Twilly), Shotguns, Machineguns - Sawed-Off (Kiss♥Love, First Class, Orange DDPAT, Rust Coat, The Kraken, Devourer, Mosaico, Wasteland Princess, Bamboo Shadow, Copper, Serenity, Limelight, Apocalypto), XM1014 (Frost Borre, Ancient Lore, Red Leather, Elegant Vines, Banana Leaf, Jungle, Urban Perforated, Grassland, Blaze Orange, Heaven Guard, VariCamo Blue, Entombed, XOXO, Seasons, Tranquility, Bone Machine, Incinegator, Teclu Burner, Black Tie, Zombie Offensive, Watchdog), Nova (Baroque Orange, Hyper Beast, Green Apple, Antique, Modern Hunter, Walnut, Forest Leaves, Graphite, Blaze Orange, Rising Skull, Tempest, Bloomstick, Interlock, Quick Sand, Moon in Libra, Clean Polymer, Red Quartz, Toy Soldier), MAG-7 (Insomnia, Cinqueda, Counter Terrace, Prism Terrace, Memento, Chainmail, Hazard, Justice, Bulldozer, Silver, Core Breach, Firestarter, Praetorian, Heat, Hard Water, Monster Call, BI83 Spectrum, SWAG-7), M249 (Humidor, Shipping Forecast, Blizzard Marbleized, Downtown, Jungle DDPAT, Nebula Crusader, Impact Drill, Emerald Poison Dart), Negev (Mjölnir, Anodized Navy, Palm, Power Loader, Bratatat, CaliCamo, Phoenix Stencil, Infrastructure, Boroque Sand), Wear - Factory New (FN), Minimal Wear (MW), Field-Tested (FT), Well-Worn (WW), Battle-Scarred (BS), Stickers Holo/Foil/Gold - Katowice 2014, Krakow 2017, Howling Dawn, Katowice 2015, Crown, London 2018, Cologne 2014, Boston 2018, Atlanta 2017, Cluj-Napoca 2015, DreamHack 2014, King on the Field, Harp of War, Winged Difuser, Cologne 2016, Cologne 2015, MLG Columbus 2016, Katowice 2019, Berlin 2019, RMR 2020, Stockholm 2021, Antwerp 2022, Swag Foil, Flammable foil, Others - Souvenirs, Agents, Pins, Passes, Gifts, Music Kits, Cases, Keys, Capsules, Packages, Patches

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submitted by _Triple_ to GlobalOffensiveTrade [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 18:40 I-just-do-stuff An apple a day keeps the doctor away was a construct of the US medical industry to trick people into eating unhealthy food

They tell people that they can do all unhealthy things and so long as they eat a single apple they will be fine, this causes more illness and more demand for the medical services. (They chose to make it about apples rather than bananas because big apple was willing to pay big medical the most)
submitted by I-just-do-stuff to LowStakesConspiracies [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 18:38 Mother-Technician715 4 pets in two weeks?

Don’t really understand my nmoms obsession for new pets. She recently got THREE baby bearded dragons that she has never had before, got a cage for a gecko she will soon get and bought a 500$ pure bred cat? Now she treats these animals better than any of her ( 5 ) kids. One of them being 9 years old. All of these pets and cages are easily over 2,000$ combined and let’s not forget she doesn’t work and now we can’t pay the bills. Don’t worry though, the animals have the best and latests supplies and cages!! (She will most likely get bored of them in a few months) and she also has 3 dogs and 1 other cat on top of this. I feel like I’m drowning. She doesn’t take care of the cat shit on the floor but will decorate her new gecko cage. Helpppp. :,(
submitted by Mother-Technician715 to raisedbynarcissists [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 18:25 Inverse_sky The (Mis)adventures of the RE Sims, Part 1- Meeting (and Beating) the Neighbours

(Warning: image heavy)
I thought this would be chaotic when I set out to do it, but I was not prepared for this much havoc. But I'm getting ahead of myself.
Since I got so many great suggestions for characters to use I decided to split them into two households, each consisting of five characters. We'll just be looking at the first one today, and I'll hopefully post about the second one over the weekend or early next week.
The first household of RE Sims consists of... (drumroll)

No, I couldn't get them all to stand in a straight line.
Phoenix Wright, Misfortune, Dr. Eggman, Sonic and Biffalo Bub! I do apologise that I suck at making Sims, so they might not look exactly like their RE counterparts. That is their lovely house in the background, the best I could buy for not a lot of Simoleons.
While everyone looked around for the first time, Phoenix seemingly had a bright idea as you can see above. What this idea was remains to be seen. Misfortune and Eggman got talking, and Bub immediately, and I mean immediately- as in the first thing he did as a new Sim with his autonomy- insulted Sonic's family. They then got into a... tense discussion.
I'm no expert in Simlish, but I don't think you need to be to figure out what this means
Phoenix wanders off to check out the house as Misfortune and Eggman continue chatting.
I have no idea what Eggman is telling Misfortune here... but they seem to be getting along. Phoenix is already done with today and wants to go to bed, it seems.
I've chucked a load of beds upstairs- 3 normal ones and a bunk bed, so we'll see who goes for what later- and all of them go to look at them. When they get upstairs, the adults all get very angry when they inspect the bunk beds- I guess adults don't like bunk beds? Misfortune likes them, though, so at least someone appreciates them. Before they can pass judgement on the rest of the sleeping situation, however, the neighbours arrive to welcome them to the town. Phoenix, Misfortune and Bub go to greet them.
Misfortune and Phoenix have a lovely conversation about...lakes, or something... with one of the neighbours, while Bub goes and says hi to one of the other ones. And by say hi, I mean he very quickly gets into a shouting match.
At least the guys in the back are having a nice time?
But if Bub, Phoenix and Misfortune are down here, doesn't that mean that the two left upstairs are...oh no... Sonic and Eggman.
Although, it turns out that Sonic and the Egg are actually having a pleasant conversation! From the interaction names, Eggman is complaining about good people to Sonic, who is seemingly agreeing with him like 'Good people? Yeah, they suuuck, right?' Before I can watch any more of this conversation, I get the following notification and dramatic scene
You've know each other for FIVE MINUTES
Bub has made mortal enemies with the next door neighbours (which he's pretty happy about, since he's Mean Spirited) and before you know it...
That poor woman standing awkwardly in the background, like 'oh no, our neighbour is a violent sociopath'
Not the best 'welcome to the neighbourhood', perhaps. The neighbours leave without any further drama, and our Sims continue with their day. Misfortune, rather surprisingly, decides to take up fishing, while Bub goes to troll on the forums using the computer, and Eggman and Sonic get into another conversation, this time where Eggman tells Sonic all about his evil plot (smart move there, bud). Phoenix goes upstairs to talk to himself in the mirror, presumably because it's the only way he can be sure of intelligent conversation. A couple of hours pass without much incident, and the housemates start to get hungry. Sonic bravely starts to do the most dangerous thing a Sim could ever do -cook. Eggman and Bub go upstairs to lie on the beds, while Phoenix... seems to be having a hard day, as he comes downstairs, looks at the armchair and immediately breaks down sobbing.
Look, I know it's not the fanciest armchair in the world, but there's no need for that.
Misfortune is still fishing. She's been fishing for about 4 hours now, and she hasn't caught anything, which might be something to do with the fact that she's fishing in what is essentially a large puddle outside the house.
Err, good luck with that.
Sonic has managed to cook what I'm told is mac and cheese, and the game has some scathing remarks as to its quality
It is quite impressive to go that wrong with mac and cheese, it has to be said
Sonic nonetheless eats half of his sorry effort and then immediately has to go and throw up in the bathroom. Phoenix is also making questionable dietary choices, as he opts for the 'Brain Freeze a La Mode' meal- which if you don't know, has a non-insignificant chance of turning Sims into zombies. Rather boringly, he's fine afterwards. Bub finds the remains of Sonic's stomach turning, incinerated, appalling attempt at mac and cheese and proves that he has no standards whatsoever by licking out the bowl. I wouldn't expect anything else from someone who calls Reese's Pieces 'Peanut Boogers'
Misfortune, by the way, is still fishing.
Eggman decides to order a pizza for himself, but then apparently immediately forgets about this and tries to cook Mac and Cheese. Let's say he's trying to prove he can beat Sonic at cooking, to prove that he's smarter than him (since Tails isn't around for him to match wits with). Bub watches the Kids channel on TV, while Phoenix is continuing his attempt to never have to talk to anyone in his house and is instead chatting to people online. Misfortune continues fishing. It seems like nothing will stop her.
Eggman's pizza arrives, and Bub takes delivery of it, leaves it outside and tries to start a fight with the pizza delivery guy. Aside from that, all seems to be going swimmingly, until...
Don't look so pleased with yourself, Eggman. You've managed to set MAC AND CHEESE on fire. It's not an accomplishment.
We weren't going to get this far without a good ol' cooking fire, were we? Everyone runs to the fire for the express purpose of panicking about it, which a rational mind would say is also possible outside where they are much less likely to get killed by the fire, but the point is moot.
The pizza delivery guy also ran in to panic at the fire.No, I don't know why.
Sonic turns out to be the saviour of the day, and puts out the fire relatively quickly. I guess running after Eggman and cleaning up the disasters he makes is kind of his thing. The good news is that the fire seemed to be the only thing powerful enough to stop Misfortune fishing. And uh, do you remember that I said Misfortune and Eggman were getting along well earlier? Well, forget that, because apparently he wants to, err...
Eggman wants this to be The Day That She Dies, apparently
At this point the firefighter heroically runs through the door, ready to save our hapless Sims from the clutches of the fatal flames- and then stands there awkwardly for a bit since Sonic's already sorted it out. Misfortune goes upstairs to check the beds for monsters (I want to say she's on the lookout for Mr Voice), and is happy to declare them all monster-free. She even gets a positive moodlet from this.
Anyhoo, the day's drama aside, it's now time for bed. I've chosen the Sims everyday clothes, but left their sleepwear up to fate. Bub and Phoenix, and to some extent Misfortune, have shockingly appropriate attire, but the other two... less so. Bub takes the top bunk bed-like we were expecting anything else- and Eggman the bottom bunk. The rest pick one of the normal beds.
That pizza guy is still here, by the by. I think he might have decided to move in.
They sleep without issue, mostly because all the issues are caused by the people who are currently asleep. The next morning, Bub goes to see if there are any reactions to his trolling on the forums (there aren't, as it turns out), Eggman has an Evil Shower (yes, that is what the interaction is actually called for Evil Sims), and Misfortune has her first day at school! Good luck, Misfortune, however contradictory that sentence is. Sonic works out using the TV, 'cause he gotta go fast.
Phoenix is, I think, sad about the fact that he's not a lawyer anymore or something as he gets some more of the Might-Turn-You-Into-A-Zombie ice cream and eats it on the toilet while in his dressing gown.
I'm sure we've all had days like this
And Bub, having learnt nothing from Sonic and Eggman's blunders in cooking yesterday, attempts to cook himself some breakfast, which the game optimistically calls 'waffles'.
Well, I think that's a good a place as any to leave things for now. Hope you enjoyed a day in the life of this wacky group. I certainly had fun watching them (although less fun trying to coax the game into working again when it tripped on its own spaghetti coding and crashed- ahh, Sims 3, never change )
If you want me to do any more posts with these guys, let me know! I'm going to do the other household as soon as is feasible.
Beard Salute! OOOGGHHH
submitted by Inverse_sky to RandomEncounters [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 18:02 lennoxious How do you guys deal with dysphoria?

I don't know how everyone does it. I see people talking about how they have to wait for surgery casually like it's not eating away at them.
Is there something wrong with me? Is my dysphoria not supposed be this bad? All I think about is my body and how it's not fair everyone else doesn't think about it all day or have to spend thousands.
Is there any pill taken to releive dysphoria? I don't think I have depression or chemical imbalance, I just react as someone would if they were put in a nightmare body.
Nobody really understands and asks what is so hard about waiting.
Even when I get top surgery I'll be reminded of dysphoria everyday by seeing the stretch marks and scars.
I'm afraid I'll wake up after surgery and still have no will to go on because of how unfair it is I had to work so hard for something everyone else is born with.
I don't like doing anything besides sleeping because that's the only time I don't know I'm in my body. What if I still don't like doing anything after surgery??
Currently i just shower with the lights off and my binder on for dysphoria. I changed my name and lisence. I use minoxidil on my beard. What else can I even do so Im not miserable??
Edit: I go to therapy, I see my friends, I am in theatre, and I've tried many coping skills. I just can't seem to distract myself as anytime I do something, I'm doing it inside of my body. All I seem to enjoy is sleeping.
submitted by lennoxious to ftm [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 18:01 PlasmaPoint Some speculations about the worldbuilding of Lumar

So i been keeping note about theories and speculations i find probable in Tress's planet. Since there's a spoiler stream tomorrow, i guess no better times to put this out there
  1. The source of the spores sea seething is likely to be from the zephyr spore interact with deep underground water, the resulting air got trapped underground, then rising through a massive network of carvens to every spore seas. These carverns likely filled with water originally before the spore consumed them.
  2. The planet still have a functional water cycle, rain still fall, animals still have access to water without desert-like adaptation (seagull, seriously, what do they eat?) so the aethers, after depleted the planet original oceans, somehow stopped siphoning away water in larger scale, or ...
  3. The primal elements result from the spores consuming water can still be breakdown futher to extract water again. In a sense, the moon aethers don't actually siphon water away from the planet, they turn water into less accessible forms.
  4. The ecosystem Xisis the dragon researching likely evolved around this task, different sea would have different creatures specialize in breaking down water for the primal element of that sea. May be some elements would be easier to be breakdown into water than others (plant) and some harder (crystal) but the total sum of all the elements gave back as much water as they originally consumed, (or nearly as much).
  5. The migration of these water-extracting creatures through the seas might be a part of the water cycle and how there are still rain at all in Lumar
  6. It's likely that Lumar only have one big source of water vapor for the paths of rain fall to be that predictable. The Crimson Sea likely gain it butterfly effect type of randomness in rain fall from being as far as possible from that water vapor source (the other side of the planet).
  7. If the spore act like water, then water act somewhat like lava in our world - only flowing underground and interact with the sea explosively. so that water vapor source is like a hot spring supervolcano? If there were water-extracting creatures on Lumar, they would migrate here carrying water from across the seas back to this hot spring, like a irl salmon return to a river to spawn.
  8. We don't see any mention of sea level changing, even near one of the Lunargree like Tress's island. So it's safe to assume that the spore sea stopped consuming land a long time ago and people already living with the spores sea for at least 300 year and up to thousand of years. This mean something on the planet are consuming as much spores as the moons drop them.
If i could ask Bradon a question tomorrow, i probably would ask about the 8 one, what's cosuming the spores? Hope this help you came up with something to ask as well or just generally excited about the book again
submitted by PlasmaPoint to Cosmere [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 18:00 RangerFrank Deathworld Commando: Reborn-Vol.6 SS- A King's Guarantee. Part.2

CoverVol.1PreviousNextMapsWiki+DiscordRoyal RoadWebNovelTapasKo-FiFandom/wiki

This is Part.2, please read Part.1 here.

“Tell me, Bishop, why are you suddenly interested in all of this? Why is Cerila here lying in bed?” I asked.
“Kaladin asked me to help her reach the level of a War God. I was testing her when I started to piece things together. But a deaf Beastmen woman trained by a Grandmaster light mage straight from the Holy Kingdom…things are starting to make sense,” Bishop said more to himself than me.
So he knocked her out…this man…what if he angered Kaladin? Ah, I suppose Kaladin isn’t so close-minded…hopefully.
He turned his intense eyes to me. “I request your help, old friend. I ask that you train Cerila on your own time. Her magic is amazing, and she is quite creative. I believe she can learn a thing or two from you. I would also request that Jessica, if she is feeling better, speak with Cerila as well. After that, I shall make moves on my own.”
I see. This is Bishop speaking to me, not King Maxwell. He must be earnest now if he is asking for my wife and me. It’s not every day I see this side of him.
I raised an eyebrow at him. “You are awfully adamant about this. Can I ask you why?”
The king smirked slightly, but his eyes were smiling a great deal. “It’s rather simple. I owe Kaladin a lot as a father and a man. He saved my family and my daughters not once but twice. I need to fulfill the first quest he’s given me, or I’ll never be able to rest easy. Helping him from the shadows can only accomplish so much and doing it alone would be a waste. I must guarantee her success.”
I shook my head. Sometimes I even forgot Bishop’s true nature. The man wasn’t just a genius on the battlefield but off of it as well. He hid behind this persona of being a meathead despite being a calm and collected person. After all, history may see that his wife was the one that spurred him into her plans, but it was actually the other way around.
Queen Maxwell was undoubtedly intelligent and crafty, but Bishop’s skills and natural charisma changed the minds of the people, nobles, and generals alike. He was the one that led the army into the city for an ambush and quickly surpassed the Brax nobility. He even lurked in the shadows, hiding behind the visage of his wife to complete his goals.
The man is quite cunning. And far from the babbling idiot, he portrays himself to be sometimes.
“And besides, I’m quite interested in this woman now,” Bishop added.
“I think she should be afraid, but I’ll agree to help. Jessica is another matter. I don’t see her being ready for anything physical for some time,” I told him.
Bishop nodded. “I understand, but I don’t need her physical prowess this time around. I’m hoping for Jessica to accomplish something only a woman can do. It will take some time, I imagine. How is she these days? I haven’t spoken to her in some time.”
I just chuckled. “You know how it is. She is getting more ravenous by the day. Trying to eat for two is quite taxing.”
“Isn't that the truth? They get so moody as well,” the king muttered.
Huh? Why did you phrase it like that?
My eyes widened as I looked at him. “Wait, don’t tell me!”
Bishop just smiled at me once more and put a finger to his lips.
Good day everyone. I hope you have all had a wonderful week. I've very much enjoyed my break, but I'm already ready to get back into the swing of things. And we are going to start a bit early with Vol.6 recap :D
To start, thanks to those of you who took the to fill out the survey in a meaningful way. I'm happy to say that 99% of the people that filled out the survey did so with good intentions. Also, the information I got from it was beneficial, and everything is on the up and up.(Regarding Ko-Fi and general operations)
As for that 1%...well, you probably know who you are and what you did. It would have been best if you perhaps at least waited for more people to fill it out not to make it so obvious :)
Also, huge thanks to uncannybook581 for helping me compile all the data into more digestible information.
So let's get into it?
General Story-
Here is the first bit of general story stuff. Things are somewhat balanced for the most part. Vol.6 was full of significant events, so there was a lot to choose from.
Also, the average for Vol.6 on a scale from 1-10 was a nine, so Vol.6 was well received overall, according to the survey.
Personally, I think this split is pretty good, and it's what I wanted. Obviously, the more significant events got more votes, but that's to be expected, but it's good to see that the more minor events were enjoyed as well. Also, the primary genre for this volume was "Drama," which probably also played a part.
General Kal info-
Let's get into Kaladin some more.
Overall, people are enjoying Kal's progress and the way he is going emotionally. Two hundred fourteen of you who responded believe that Kal should remain the same, while the other 21% want him to use the fame just a bit more. Which is good for me because I agree wholeheartedly with that outcome.
Kal's character isn't the type to want riches and fame. It was never his goal nor a desire for him. I think if Kal started unnecessarily swinging his weight around for minor reasons, that would reflect poorly on the character I've created.
Don't get me wrong that doesn't mean he won't ever use his fame because that would be just as dumb. But, when the time comes, and the situation is appropriate, Kal won't be afraid to utilize that newfound fame/powerank, I promise.
Also, = Vol.6 = Vol.3
I thought this was a fun tidbit. I asked this question oh so long ago after Vol.3, and it brings a smile to my face to see things are still going in the right direction.
Kal Power Level-
So, it appears that many of you want to see a more powerful Kaladin. And I can understand that.
Kal is in a weird spot right now. He's stronger than most of the people around him in a one-on-one fight to the death, but those who are in the top percent of the world's power are still giving him a hard time.
I like it. I know that might not be the answer you are looking for, but Kal's strength has come a long way from the kid who passed out just making a small gust of wind behind his house. Also, I don't see myself giving Kal too many schools of magic. He's already at a high number for this world, and he has hardly mastered what he has. So giving him more right now would be too much.
Also, giving him some arbitrary power boost isn't in the cards. To be honest, I think the only "plotty" power I gave him was the Dragon eye, and that probably wouldn't help in a life-or-death fight against, say, King Maxwell.
We also have yet to see Kal fully go out against a powerful humanoid who is in that top-tier strength of the world. Sure, he's sparred with his dad, Cerila, Syvlia, and Professor Garrison, but there is a huge difference between a spar and an actual fight. In all those fights, Kal never had the intention to kill his opponent, which is a massive difference and can easily skew results, as it should, in my opinion.
I've been pretty consistent on Kal's stronger magic being dangerous not only to his enemies but to him, after all. It wouldn't make much sense for him to go around and start plasma bolting Cerila in a duel just because he wanted to win, now would it?
Although I hope you don't think that will be the case forever. Things would be boring if Kal never fought a strong enemy of that caliber. So we will be seeing something soonish in the story. Also, we are going to soldify the powerscale for the most part in Vol.7.
Also, things would be boring if Kal just stayed where he was, never able to deal with some of these severe threats himself. We will see some training and development on multiple fronts (magic/equipment) in making Kaladin "stronger." And we are going to see that in Vol.7.
Will he achieve the Dragon Emperor level of power that many of you wanted? Who knows :) I guess we will have to read and find out.
This brings me to a question some of you asked, "Why does Kal's power level seem to be all over the place." And the answer is, "What were his intentions and the circumstances of him going into the fight?"
If he was fighting, say, Tsarra, he's not going to drop blue plasma fire on her head and attempt to kill her. Nor is he going to engage in that brutal close-quarters combat and break her bones (Unless that was the goal of the fight, which would be weird). Kal going into a spar with Tsasrra should be different than Kal going into battle with The Chapter of Despair. The motives are different, and so should the outcome.
It's the reason he lost to Cerila for the first time. He went into the battle nonchalantly, with no intentions of taking it seriously. And in return, he lost(Although there was more to that, to be fair.)
Same with Sylvia and the fight at the ranch. They both got heated, the goal shifted, Kal got too serious, and he put Sylvia in a bad position. The goal changed briefly, and so did the outcome.
Kal Politics/Luminar-
And now, onto this part. This was also interesting, especially the second question, since for a long time, it was deadlocked at 50-50. Like, actually, at 50-50 even with 200+ responses.
But, judging by the third question, most of you want him to interject somewhat into Luminar's politics, even if it is just a little bit.
In the coming chapters and volumes, if this survey is to go off of anything, I think most of you will be happy about the future of Kal's involvement with Luminar and its politics.
There will be a little of that in Vol.7, but we can look forward to it later on. After all, we have 3 siblings who can take the throne. Kal's gotta handle that somehow :)
Kal & Mila-
This one surprised me a bit. I would have thought that many of you would have wanted to keep Mila out of the fight. Although thinking about it, I did put in "protect herself" which is an obvious want.
Of course, Kaladin would want Mila to be able to protect herself. That has been drilled into Kaladin for a long time. Even his parents were like that, so it makes sense that he would want to do the same.
But I also feel that he would be hesitant at the same time, even if it were slightly illogical...huh...
Well, I suppose we will have to wait and see. She is a bit too young to be training so hard anyway.
And for the 12 who strongly dislike Mila, you truly are the worst :'( How could you hate this face? What's wrong with you, huh? You probably kick kittens or something, you psycho.
Kal & His Past
So, we are mostly in agreement on this section. I also think Kal's reveal to Sylvia was important and a good thing that needed to happen. It did a lot for both of them and their relationship, which was the goal.
As for the reveal of his past to more people and the open responses, most of you wanted something along the lines of "some event needs to happen for him to share more." What those events were depended on the response, but it boiled down to much the same thing.
And I agree. I think Kal going off and telling people about his past for no good reason would probably be a net negative thing overall. Some external factors or forces would have to make him do so.
And that is also in regard to his parents.
I think him telling Sylvia versus him telling his parents are similar yet vastly different things. I mean, look at it this way.
The relationship someone has with their mother or father is entirely different from their spouse, right? Sure, there are overlapping things like love, being a family, seeing them succeed in life, and wanting to be with them, amongst other things, but the things a mother does for a son or daughter are different from what a husband would do for a wife.
Just imagine if the child who was your pride and joy, the little creature that you thought was half of you with the love of your life, and the little monster that you changed its poopy pants for years turned out to be a grown man—a killing machine from another world at that who lived an entirely different life before coming out of you.
I think that revelation of that fact would be different for a mother or father than, say, a girlfriend or boyfriend. And the ramifications would also be different. So I think Kal should be 10x more afraid to tell his mother about his past than Cerila.
At least, in my opinion, that is. What happens in the story remains to be seen.
Kal, Love, Relationships, & Harems-
The section I'm sure many of you have been waiting for. This is probably going to take a while, and I hope that I can call my points across. I've been going over this section and my eventual response in my head for weeks... let's just hope it writes out as good or better than what I've been thinking.
\Throw out any idea of forcing someone into a relationship for this section—no slave harems or making people do anything against their will. That's an entirely different subject matter and has nothing to do with what I am writing or will write.*
So, I got a question in the Q&A section I thought I would start with. "What makes a harem, a harem to you?"
I am of the orange response, mostly. I don't believe that a small group of people entering into a mutual relationship is automatically a harem. Multiple people vying for one person's affection also does not equal a harem in my eyes. Not all polyamorous relationships are a harem.
Basically, I only used harem because it is the most frequently used term to describe something like this. Although, I believe that term to be wrong in most cases and only really applies to anime esq harems that are over the top.
And before we delve deeper, I want to thank all of you who came into these questions to actually give me proper feedback, constructive criticism, and advice. Those of you who did so, even if you believe this to be a personal negative aspect of the story or don't care either way, are fantastic people. Thanks for putting the time into some of those open responses.
And to those of you who just left one-word sentences or some gibberish in the open responses, you missed the point and the opportunity.
And to those of you specifically who are sending me meaningless threats of "I'll leave or drop the story if you do XYZ" with no actual substance, I find you to be obnoxious. Please slither back into whatever dark hole you crawled out from. Your opinions mean nothing to me, and they won't sway my vision of this story in the slightest. If I had given in to people like you, I would have stopped writing this story in Vol.2.
This is my story. It always has been and always will be. So I'll tell it how I want to.
Now... let's talk about it.
According to the survey, things mainly seemed split. 99, no, 73, yes, and 106, no opinon. Now, depending on what side of the fence you sit on, you might think that 106 no opinion is more toward your side. But it seems a lot of those 106 people left similar responses in the open section (I think). I'm choosing to think of those 106 no opinions as "Certain things need to happen, and they need to happen well," instead of, "I don't care at all."
A lot of your concerns were the same,
"Sylvia wouldn't allow it."
"Cerila and Sylvia do not mesh at all right now. Them being romantic together makes no sense."
"A group of women "fighting" over one character is bad."
"As the characters are, them all entering a relationship together makes no sense."
"The partners should all be equally considered and not just be shallow prizes for Kaladin."
"Things should be thought out and developed."
"It needs proper build-up and a real connection between the different characters."
"They should behave like ordinary people and make realistic choices."
"Kaladin is currently not fit to have dozens of women in a harem."
"Having an obscene amount of partners in a relationship is typically bad and becomes cumbersome in the story. Diverting attention from what matters as it tries to get all the "partners" a piece."
Although these are primarily boiled-down versions of your responses, you get the gist. And to these concerns/remarks, I wholeheartedly agree with you, 100%. These are spot on and how I also feel, and I recognize all of this.
For those of you who said it was "impossible regardless" or "is too much of a suspension of disbelief," I disagree. Is a polyamorous relationship less likely to succeed than a monogamous one? Yeah, most definitely. Not that monogamous marriage is all that successful and the end all be all in the first place, but I do recognize these things. I also don't think it requires any more suspension of disbelief than is what is needed to believe in a reborn supersoldier in a fantasy world as an elf that slays dragons.
But hey, that's my humble opinion.
Anyway, to those above concerns, I once again agree. As things are now, Sylvia and "insert any character" would never be able to enter a relationship together with Kaladin as a package. If I forced it, it would be disingenuous to the characters I created and would be wrong. And there is no reason to pretend otherwise,
Sylvia is the number 1 candidate to be with Kaladin right now.
It would also be just as bad if Kaladin suddenly flipped the story on its head and started telling Sylvia to allow him to have a bunch of women or even to begin seeking out other women under Sylvia's nose or directly in her face. That's not Kaladin. That's not the character I created, so it won't be like that in this story.
Regardless, instead of telling you what I'm going to do. Let me tell you what I'm not going to do.
As I've said before, Kaladin is not going to suddenly become a playboy and start collecting women just because they showed interest in him. It took him this long to openly and purposely flirt with Sylvia in chapter 150, and it was the equivalent of "You as pretty as da moon." For him to go from that to banging any woman that showed interest in him would be wild, and it won't be happening, ever.
I said this once before, truly loving Kaladin should be hard. Sure, on the outside, being interested in Kaladin makes complete sense. He has money, power, prestige, a pedigree, looks, and a decent enough personality to tie it all together loosely. However, genuinely loving him would be challenging the second you peer through his cracks and see him for who he really is.
Just look at what happened to Ren. I'd say her feelings got crushed the second she saw him for who he was underneath the mask (literally, heh). Even if they did bounce back, saying they were the same as before would be hard.
Also, for example, Sylvia and Cerila having a single heart-to-heart conversation and just being like, "Oh yeah, I guess this is okay. Let's do it." Won't be happening. If it were to happen, far more things would have to go down in the story. And that includes any character being with Kaladin.
My track record of deep emotional issues in this story has been relatively successful, or so I think. I don't think I've done any character injustice so far regarding a serious "Drama" orientated matter. Things have been slow, and I've built a solid, somewhat realistic foundation for many of these characters, and I have 0 intentions of breaking them now. Just look at Kaladin. If a small half-assed conversation were enough to set him right, things would have been over a long time ago, right?
Basically, what I'm saying is, trust me and the process. I don't think I've let you down yet, and I don't intend to do so ever.
Also, for those of you who left questions about the current stance on Kal's relationship with Sylvia, I thought I gave a pretty good indicator in chapter 150. But maybe I missed the mark?
What I thought I did was Kal set a wall in front of Cerila with conditions for both of them that needed to be met to move forward in any capacity. Many of those conditions were realistic, would be challenging to accomplish, and there were no hollow guarantees of some fantasy outcome. That Kal openly accepted his feelings for Sylvia and will be progressing forward, even if it's awkward and a bit slow.
That's what I thought I did, but once again, maybe I missed that mark for some of you. Either way, you will see a marked difference in their relationship in Vol. 7, a big enough difference to go, "Oh, I see things really are changing."
As for anyone else, we will have to wait and see how things develop.
Whew, hopefully, I got everything. Now that that is done, let me give a few more quick reminders.
Graphic, written out in detail, sex in this story won't be happening ever, no exceptions. Things, if/when they ever do occur, will be fade to black 100% of the time.
Basically, what you are going to get is what you've got now. At this point, thinly/scantly dressed characters or omissions to an appearance of a character in that kind of situation are as spicy as it gets.
Also, just because Vol.5/6 had lots of romance and drama doesn't mean that every single volume is going to be like this. I've got a lot in the tank, and that being the focus 24/7 isn't the goal. Although, don't get me wrong, Drama was always a primary genre of this story, and it won't be going anywhere.
Volume 7 & The Story-
So, yeah, Vol.7 is gonna be fun, hopefully. Action is coming and all that :) But we have to get there first, so there is some usual volume build-up, but I swear it will be worth it! And the fighting tournament should be fun with a bit of...well, yeah. No spoilers for that.
Honestly, the best way to look at the story right now is to think of Vol.6 as the end of the story's first half. And maybe seeing chapters like 143ish as the new prologue.
So that leads me to some Q&A questions I got regarding the story-
Q: How long is this story?
A: We are halfway through it.
Q: So does that mean there are 6 or 7 more volumes left?
A: I honestly have no idea. I know that sounds dumb, but it's the truth. There was a point in my head that I thought Volume 4&5 was the same volume. So telling you that there is going to be "x amount of volumes" at this point would be a lie because I don't know how long it's going to take me to get to the end.
Q: Is there an end to this story? To Kaladin's journey?
A: Yes, 100% there is an end, and I will make it come to life even if everyone leaves me. This story will not last forever or for ten thousand chapters. This will also not be an open-ended ending either because I'm not too fond of those in 99% of cases.
Q: Why don't you know about your own ending? Why can't you give us a guess?
A: Because if I give you a guess and I'm under, you will be disappointed for no reason. And if I overestimate, you might think things are going on too long. So I hope you know that I have the destinations for this story in my head. I'm just writing the journey :)
Q: Will we see Squeaks again?
A: Yes, in this volume, actually :) (Only spoiler you are getting from me)
Oh, and here is Vol.7's cover
What I've Been Up To & The Future Plans.
Keep this section rather short, hopefully.
One, I thank all of you who are concerned about my health. I know recently I've been saying I've been going to the doctor a lot lately, but I swear nothing is going on.
I'm in good health and just went over my biannual blood results—nothing of note or to be concerned of. I got glasses for driving at night and for far distances. That's a recent problem, I guess. But that's all my fault since I spend most of my life watching a screen. My up-close vison is still amazing and doesn't affect my writing at all.
As for the plans, I wanted to let you know about some behind-the-scenes things.
For one, I'm looking for a professional developmental editor(Whole nine yards of editing, not just a line editor), so if anyone out there knows one or is one, hit me up.
Before I think about getting a webcomic going up, I decided to solidify Volume 1's content and get it fully edited and published because it makes no sense to adapt a comic on content that isn't finalized.
And yes, I do plan on going back to all the old volumes and doing just that. Add more content/chapters, get artwork, and all that jazz.
Also, if you are or know a voice actonarrator and are interested in doing an audiobook, also hit me up.
I have some plans for all this. I think I'm going to go through with it in the summer. Things are looking good, and I'm looking forward to it.
Also, the second story... I've been slacking on this a bit. I intended to finish it last month, but things happened...oops.
As of writing this, I'm 75% done with both of the starts, and I'm almost ready to get people to pre-read them. We shall see how that goes.
I also figured I would give a notice of some breaks I'll be taking in the coming months, especially during summer. I'll be taking about a week off in June and maybe 1-2 weeks off in July. So I figured I would just warn you now and remind you again when it comes around.

Finish the Q&A here.


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2023.03.30 17:55 RangerFrank Deathworld Commando: Reborn-Vol.6 SS- A King's Guarantee. Part.1

CoverVol.1PreviousNextMapsWiki+DiscordRoyal RoadWebNovelTapasKo-FiFandom/wiki
Remember, the end of the volume recap is coming; make sure you check that out. She's a big one.
And yes, I know I'm splitting these chapters weirdly. It's because the recap is just that big.
King Maxwell’s POV
Mmm…yes…today is another good day. The soreness in my arms just won’t go away. What a wonderful feeling. Me? Sore? It’s been years…that man is truly something. My only regret is that I didn’t get to meet him sooner.
“Ah, Your Majesty, are you injured? You keep nursing your arm as if you are in pain…” Arbra asked hesitantly.
I just chuckled at her concern. “There is nothing to worry about, Arbra! It’s a good pain that your magic would only take away from me!”
Arbra bowed deeply. “I’m so sorry, Your Majesty, I had no idea!” she shouted. “Please for—”
Sigh…this is also why I like Kaladin so much. I feel as if he doesn’t care that I’m the king and treats me like a comrade. Well, he wants to, but whatever sense of formality he has keeps getting in the way. It’s been too long since I’ve been around those kinds of people. I wish he would just forget that I was a ruler.
Arbra looked up at me with teary eyes. “H—have I offended you?”
I gave the poor girl a pat on the shoulder. “Why are you crying, Arbra? Raise your head. People might think that I abuse you or something. I’m simply just thinking about this and that. Pay no mind to me.”
Arbra’s smile returned as she wiped her eyes with her sleeve. Sometimes people like her could be so burdensome, but she’s a good soul and a trusted healer. If I could call old man Paine, I’d like nothing more, but I could hardly do that for such a personal reason.
I just wonder when she is coming…you know, come to think of it, I never did ask Kaladin if it was Sylvia.
I just assumed it would be her, after all. Her strength has been recorded more than once. She felled a Troll with ease and can even train with Kaladin on equal footing. Plus, she was some kind of ancient Vampire that could survive even the strike of a Dragon? If somebody was on the verge of being a War God, it had to be her, right?
“I already know she is a War God. She has the aptitude. She is just missing…something. And sadly, I don’t know what that something is.”
What an exciting thing to say to someone. It almost sounded like a hopeful parent that was full of themselves. A person should be very aware if they are a War God or not. At a young age, the differences might not be noticeable, but they should become evident over time. But since it was Kaladin that said that, I had to believe the man’s intuition.
“Your Majesty, may I ask why you have retrieved me so suddenly? Are you expecting another fight…”Arba asked meekly.
“Ah, I suppose I did abruptly rip you from your duties. But it seems you already answered your own question!” I laughed. “I’m here on a personal favor from a friend!”
She gave me a blank look. “Huh? Friend?”
I slapped her on the shoulder a few times and nodded while I looked out at the courtyard. “Yes! A friend! Haha!”
Now then…oh? Who—oh…it’s her? Huh… interesting.
Breathtaking long muscular legs that strode through the halls, hair as white as the freshest snow, and a face straight out of a painting. I’d only seen her from a distance but she was truly a beautiful woman. To think Kaladin could surround himself with such beauties and remain unaffected. He’s as strong-willed as they came.
My daughters are nothing to scoff at, but they need to get their heads out of the mud! Haha!
“Yo! Ah…damn…Celia!?” I yelled. “That’s your name, right?! Come!”
Damn, I should have read her file more. I didn’t think much about it, and my concerns have lied elsewhere recently.

“It appears she is ignoring you, Your Majesty,” Abra commented as the woman continued to walk down the hall.
“Well, that’s rude,” I muttered as I picked a clump of snow up and reared back. “Haha! This should grab her attention!” I yelled as I tossed the snowball.
“It appears she dodged your attack, Your Majesty,” Abra stated.
“Thanks, Abra. I appreciate the narration,” I mumbled.
She dodged at the last moment, and what’s with that disgusted look on her face? And wait—wait! Why is she walking away?!
“Now, I can’t stand for that!” I yelled as I took off toward her.
Once again, she flicked around at the last moment and batted my arm away. It seemed her instincts were pretty good, but that’s to be expected from a Beastmen.
I intended on testing her today anyway, so let’s find out what Kaladin sees in this girl!
“Show me what you got!” I chuckled.
Of course, I had no intentions of going all out. I just planned on picking up the pace a bit. I wonder if that sword was just for decoration!
I put a little more oomph into the next series of attacks, and she unsheathed her sword and deftly parried and blocked my attacks. Her speed was pretty good, and she had no trouble reading my simple attacks, so let’s go a step further!
Let’s see some footwork!
I stepped into her aggressively and started swinging with more precision, randomizing my punches as I forced her onto her back foot. She gave a short slice at my exposed ribs, and I coated the strike zone in crystal. I had purposely left myself open to see if she would capitalize, and she did just that.
I jumped back and crossed my arms, and went into deep thought. I had to examine her in a more favorable light now. She was indeed skilled as she was beautiful. Her footwork and blade skills were well-honed. Not perfect by any means, but far better than most.
My only critique at this moment was that she seemed too practiced. One could swing a sword under instruction all day for eternity, but if they never put that practice into any worthwhile experience, it would amount to nothing but eye candy. Even so, saying she was entirely without experience wasn’t right either…mmm…
And there was something off about it all. Her swings and her stance didn't seem to match her weapon choice. She was using a typical iron sword, but her movements and stance indicated she was used to something a bit heftier.
Does this mean there is an imbalance in her skills, practice, and experience? Or is she perhaps holding back? Mhm…I wonder if she is using a weapon that’s not her primary one. Only people who want to hide their power do that. Is that why Kaladin sees she has the aptitude but isn’t able to apply them
No…more testing is needed before I can come to a decision. I’m getting pumped already! Haha!
“To think I’d be this serious! All you young ones are impressive these days!” I said with a laugh.
The girl looked at me like I was a strange creature. Suddenly a black stone tablet materialized from thin air, and she started writing on it.
the tablet read, the lettering glowing a faint blue light.
I could feel my jaw drop. “Who am I?” I asked in utter disbelief.
The Beastmen nodded her head, her confused look not disappearing. I tapped my head to make sure my crown was still there. “There is a crown on my head! I’m the king! What is there to be confused about?”
A flash of understanding crossed her face as she started writing on the tablet with her finger.

I heard somebody gasping and looked back at Abra, who was white as a sheet and wholly mortified. I guess she must have read the tablet and had quite the shock. But me…I couldn’t contain my laughter.
“That’s a new one! To think you would insult me directly to my face! You are, without a doubt, a friend of Kaladin’s!” I yelled into the afternoon air.
But wait a moment…that collar…is she his friend? Have I been rude and insulted his fiance or…mhm…questions to be answered, I’m sure.
“Now that you’ve connected the dots, it’s time for a true test! I’ll be getting serious, so prepare yourself, Cela!” I shouted as I bounded toward her.
She gave me a slightly miffed look before the tablet disappeared, and her sword blocked my first strike. But now, I would test her strength. Beastmen weren’t just known for their heightened senses and speed but also for their strength! I can already tell Kaladin has trained her just by looking at her body!
I brought both my fists up and sent them down with the full intention of crushing her with pure strength. Before, I hadn't been putting much effort into my strikes, but now every blow from me would come at a cost if it connected. The only way to see someone’s true worth was to put them in danger!
“Oh! As strong as you are beautiful!” I yelled in excitement, hoping to get a reaction out of her.
But she didn’t even react to my words as she blocked my double power strike with the strength befitting a War God candidate. I wonder if she was perhaps what the Beastmen called a Child of The Hunt? A rare individual amongst their race. Even though I don’t quite understand the qualifications for what makes a Beastmen a Child of The Hunt, I know they are supposed to be quite strong.
I mean, her mana enhancement was where it needed to be! No doubts about it—
Huh? A spell core?
I couldn’t help but marvel at the feeling of a spell core suddenly being formed in front of me. Its instantaneous formation from her feet was nothing short of pure talent and skill. And she did that all while maintaining her mana enhancement, not so much as faltering even an inch.
I let the spell hit my chest, which was covered in my crystal, and broke away from our little grapple. Tiny ice spears floated around her, and she aimed her sword at me. I just laughed, which probably made her angry, judging by her expression.
She was just like Kaladin, and they were just like those taught in the Holy Kingdom of Arotal. That ability to cast magic and form spell cores without a drop in mana enhancement was a talent many high-ranking officials from that country possessed.
It took me almost a decade to unlearn my habits and learn their technique, and even then, I could only copy it. I don’t mean to brag, but I was a cut above the rest. I tried to teach their technique to all three of my children, but none of them could learn it. Even Bowen was unable to perform the technique.
To be honest, it was a technique only those who possessed talent and were brought up with it could learn. I thought Kaladin was simply a genius of that caliber, but now I’ve seen a pattern.
Who trained those two? Alanis was not capable of using that technique either, so does that mean it was The Lightning Witch? Ah…I’m just so excited.
I burst forward and crushed down the spells that were thrown at me. Most of them I ignored, allowing them to break harmlessly against my body. It was slightly annoying that she wasn’t putting more strength into her spells. If she could manifest them this quickly, I expected the power to be more!
I guess I just need to show her how serious I am.
I increased my speed suddenly and arrived in front of her. Her amber-orange eyes went wide. She managed to block my fists, but this entire time I had only used them. She tried to react, but she was too slow for me. My kick landed on her quad with a meaty smack followed by a loud crack. She buckled to the floor and yelped in pain. I had broken her leg.
A flurry of ice spikes came at me, and I retreated instead of finishing her off. I wasn’t done testing her yet. I was far too curious to end things so soon.
“Arbra! Heal her leg!” I ordered.
Arbra scurried off from the side, mumbling apologies to her as a golden light left her hands and infused the injury. Celia looked to be in quite a bit of pain, but a moment of confusion appeared in her eyes only to disappear. She stood on her freshly healed leg without a lick of hesitation.
So an injury like that is nothing to her? Sure, she reacted to the pain, but that’s only natural. To stand right back up after having your leg healed isn’t normal. It appears her will was quite tempered. And those eyes…
Her eyes blazed with a cold fury that wasn’t there before. She dropped her sword into a low guard, a position that was more suited for a long or even a great sword, and I felt a powerful spell core being formed.
A gust of wind blasted me, and a blizzard suddenly appeared around me. The cold wind whipped at my exposed skin, and I could feel minor cuts on my face.
Finally, show me what Kaladin sees in you!
I swatted down an incoming spell core only to be momentarily covered in water. I hadn’t expected her to be able to use water magic while maintaining this silent blizzard, which was another odd phenomenon. Only for my surprise to grow as I felt a powerful wind arrow approaching me.
It cut through the blizzard and had enough power to rip a limb off, but I batted it away. I was buffeted by powerful spell after spell, and I couldn’t contain my laughter. I thought the speed at which she formed her spells was at least the skill of a Master mage, but to think she could use three schools of magic to this proficiency. Of course, she may just be a Grandmaster mage, but I felt that something was off.
I decided I was done gauging those spells and burst through the blizzard right at her. She had positioned herself behind me using her magic as cover and near silent steps. Beastmen were also tricky ones. They seemed to be able to disappear from most people’s senses when they wanted to.
But not mine.
I punched forward and expected a look of surprise, but Celia was more than ready for me. I was greeted by two large ice spikes aiming for my legs and a sword aiming to cut my head off my shoulders. I kicked one of the spikes down and used its debris against her, sending chunks of ice magic into her face, only for those chunks to melt into harmless water that splattered against her face.
Amazing, she was maintaining control over her spells the entire time while also striking at me. Truly fantastic, I thought as I slipped under her swing.
I punched her underneath the leather breastplate and grabbed Celia by the belt, and gave her a good toss into the wall, just like ol’ Kaladin. But unlike Kaladin, I was ready to end things here, or…so I thought.
Amazing. Truly amazing. I’m actually feeling the need to preserve my life. How long has it been?
I felt dozens of spell cores form around me, and the puddle I stood in turned into a creeping frost that threatened to consume me. Dozens of ice spears formed from the snow left by the blizzard, and I watched as a wall of ice formed only for the girl to use it to bounce rebound off of and aim straight for me once more.
She had completely changed the battlefield to suit her, something very few mages could do, let alone at the level she showed. And it appeared she even led me by the nose. How far ahead did she plan all of this? Did she anticipate these things the moment she used the blizzard to distract me and morph the battlefield?
But I also understood what Kaladin meant when he said she had the “aptitude.” Why she felt so close yet so far, she had all these well-honed skills and even put them into practical use. And despite having the upper hand on me.
It just wasn’t enough.
I forced mana into my body at a much greater rate and felt the familiar feeling of my crystals enveloping me. Her spells crashed against me, but I remained steadfast as I moved forward. Her eyes widened again in surprise, and it was the last thing I saw before I grabbed her by the face and sent her face down into the snowy soil with a loud boom.
I turned my head slowly. “Arbra, heal her,” I ordered.
Arbra slowly nodded her head like she was in a daze. “I’ll be gone for a while. I have an old friend to find. Please see to it that she is comfortable.”
Bowen Taurus’s POV
I gave the door a solid knock and announced myself. “I have arrived as you requested, Your Majesty.”
“Good! Hurry up and come in, old friend!” the king bellowed.
Sigh…would it kill him to uphold a little bit of digni—huh?
“Cerila? Why…why is she here? Why is she unconscious?”
The king smacked his fist into a meaty palm. “Ah! Her name was Cerila! That’s why she was annoyed with me!” he said with a chuckle. But he puffed his lips out at me. “And unconscious? Why are you assuming that? Maybe she is just sleeping.”
I just sighed and shook my head. “The girl may be deaf, but your incensive laughter could wake the dead.”
King Maxwell looked at me with an expression of surprise as his head snapped back and forth between the sleeping Cerila and me. “She’s deaf? Like really deaf? No hearing at all?”
“That’s right…please tell me you knew that,” I muttered in disbelief. I could feel a headache coming on.
“That makes so much sense. I thought she was just shy or a mute,” the king mumbled to himself. “Tell me, why hasn’t anyone healed her? She is close to Kaladin, no?”
I walked into the room and sat down in an available chair. “I’ve already spoken with them on the matter. She was born deaf, and not even a Grandmaster light mage could heal her ears. So—Your Majesty?”
Bishop wore a thoughtful expression. His deep blue eyes were wide and searching for something, and I felt my skin start to crawl somewhat when he looked at me. “A Grandmaster light mage, you say…tell me, is that confirmed?” he asked, his voice lacking the friendly tone he typically used.
It’s been a long time since I’ve seen him like this, not since he first started to investigate Kaladin.
“I’ve heard the same thing from three different sources, including Cerila when I spoke with her at great length. I have no reason to believe any of them are lying to me at this point. The girl is completely deaf,” I explained.
King Maxwell rubbed his chin slowly. “So…do we know who trained Kaladin and this girl?”
Wait, I thought he cared more about her deafness…what is this about?
“Kaladin has mentioned to me before that his teacher was his grandfather,” I told him.
The king looked even more surprised at that but quickly shook his head. “That’s impossible. Neither of those old Elves would have come into contact with—”
“That’s because it wasn’t a blood-related grandfather but an adoptive one of sorts. I’ve met him once or twice now. He’s an old Human man at the end of his life. And appears to be quite smart and witty despite his declining age. He often teaches the young ones various skills at my spare home.”
“An old Human man…isn’t Kaladin from Syn’nari?” the king trailed off.
I shot out of my seat. “Wait a moment…a Grandmaster light mage in Syn’nari… are you suggesting their teacher and Grandfather is a remnant of the Holy King invasion force?”
The king smirked and crossed his arms. “It’s not a suggestion. It’s almost a guarantee at this point.”
I ran a hand through my beard. “The old man referred to himself as a doctor, so I never questioned why he considered himself to be one. Even Kaladin’s parents call him Dr. Jacobs. And the man doesn’t seem to be pious or even wear symbols of the faith. I never connected these points because I didn’t think they were relevant.”


submitted by RangerFrank to HFY [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 17:48 Sufficient-Ask9071 Seven months later...

I lost my beloved little dog Lula in August.
I've been crying every day since then, and missing the heck out of her. I had put all of her stuff in the garage as it was too heartbreaking for me to look at it (I burst into tears whenever I went into the garage LOL)
Last week, seven months after her passing, I finally worked up the courage to take care of her things. After 14 years with me (and a lot of family members who loved to spoil her rotten), she had crates and blankets and bowls and toys up the wazoo. SO many toys.
She also loved the attention she got when she wore clothes, doggy hats/sunglasses and headbands.
So I donated all of it to my local No-Kill humane society. I cried the whole time there, and kept reminding myself Lula didn't need these things but someone else would appreciate them. The employee who helped me unload my car was so nice to me about it (as I was crying while donating too LOL) and told me about his recent loss of his Bearded dragon and how he after 6 months was also able to finally let go of her things. I cried the whole way home but I felt a little bit better. I was also able to go into the garage and not cry like a normal person! 🙂
Much to my surprise and delight, yesterday my local news ran a story about Pet of the Week from the humane society, and the little kitty needing a new home was wearing my Lula's hat that I donated! ❤️
I got curious and checked out their website and sure enough, a whole bunch of doggies and kitties were wearing my Lula's clothes/hats and headbands in the photos and they looked SO CUTE! Most of them had my Lula's toys and blankets in the background with them or in their mouths!
I hope my Lula's stuff can help those animals find some loving homes! (cute pictures at pounds/humane societies ALWAYS help pets get adopted quicker!)
I just needed to tell my story. It's been a rough time, as everyone here knows. I still cry and miss her every day but it's a different kind of pain now. I think I'm maybe getting better and working through my grief.
I wanted to remind everyone here that's there's no timeline or rush for grieving your loved ones. And there is a light at the end after a long dark road. We'll always miss them and have them in our hearts.
submitted by Sufficient-Ask9071 to Petloss [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 17:43 flyinghorseduck 120 Insanity Effects

You feel only slight discomfort as your mind begins to slip. Roll a d120 to find out how the insanity affects you.
Roll Result
1 The affected person seems to think they have switched bodies with the first person they see every day.
2 A fear of growing older is instilled in them--and a desperation to never grow feeble. Impatience is formed as a result of the knowledge that with every passing second they are slowly dying, and as such they have a short fuse.
3 The affected has an unnatural obsession with black hair.
4 The afflicted believes they have extra, imaginary appendages, and they try to use whatever extra limb they believe they have, which obviously never works.
5 The afflicted becomes a mild pyromaniac. They have to make a CD 8 Wis check every time they see a fire. On a fail, they try to spread that fire once they are safe to do so.
6 The afflicted character can no longer remember anyone's actual name and refers to everyone by nicknames from now on.
7 The insane person suffers from extreme paranoia and treats ALL creatures as 'hostile.'
8 The person decides to create a massive loot hoard, not unlike ones in a red dragon den. Person will take any gold and valuables they see, by whatever means they see fit, and then take them to their home.
9 The affected is convinced that he/she is a vampire, and will seek out humanoid blood. Also takes 1d4 psychic damage per minute of sun exposure, and believes the image of him/herself in mirrors is an illusion.
10 The character reverses alignment every last day of the month. If they are in any way neutral, throw 1d4. Odd makes evil or chaotic, even makes them good or lawful.
11 The afflicted character verbalizes all of their internal thought processes unless they put a concerted effort into not doing so. While suppressing the verbalization of their thoughts, they have disadvantage on skill checks and saves, cannot cast Concentration spells, and speak in strained and broken sentences.
12 The affected person sincerely believes they can cast the Wish spell at will, and tries to cast it frequently.
13 The affected hears the constant sound of rolling dice.
14 The afflicted believes their body parts have separate personalities and spends most of their time trying to broker peace between them.
15 The afflicted grows to believe their skin is incredibly durable, and refuses to wear armor of any kind.
16 You find a pineapple (or any available fruit) named "Wilson" that speaks for you now.
17 Your character is convinced they are the Chosen One of the first prophecy they hear, and will seek to fulfill their destiny no matter how impossible.
18 The effected develops triskaidekaphobia, an irrational fear of the number 13.
19 The affected, when addressed by name, will paralyze themselves in fear until left completely alone.
20 The afflicted sees everything as being in a slightly different physical place than it actually is. It’s a tiny, almost insignificant different, but It is very noticeable when in direct conversation with them because they never make actual eye contact. They look the smallest bit away.
21 The afflicted grows an interest for poetry, and starts making their own, terrible poems.
22 You start spinning and humming "Twinkle-twinkle" for hours on end.
23 The afflicted is incredibly terrified of the dark because of the unspeakable creatures and horrific sounds that exist there, so they always carry some form of light and are likely to freak if it ever goes out.
24 The character partially loses the sense of hunger. Every 1d20 hours, they have to make a CD 8 Wis check. On a fail, they believe to be extremely hungry, and will do anything they can to get a meal.
25 The person grows extremely afraid of gravity. Even a tiny unevenness makes them pee their pants.
26 You will have an obsession with flipping a gold coin for every decision you make.
27 The character is suddenly attracted to their own image, even though they don't recognize it. They try to talk to themselves in the mirror, fully believing it's a different person, and the love of their life.
28 The afflicted knows, without a doubt, that they are the real, biological parent of someone else (ideally, a PC); and they want to make it up to their child for never having realized this before.
29 The afflicted thinks it's rude to drink or eat in public, and will hide from anyone else before they do one of these things.
30 The affected develops trypophobia.
31 The afflicted believes that their hands and feet have been replaced with spoons.
32 The afflicted person believes he suffers from spontaneous combustion, and whenever there's a talking bit, he has to roll whether he is fine, or spends the entire chat rolling on the floor and screaming.
33 The person believes they are a polymorphed metallic dragon, stuck in human form. They set out to fix their "curse".
34 Your character develops the paranoid delusion that a random party member is always watching them.
35 The afflicted believes to be in a dream, and is constantly trying to wake up. However, they are too afraid to try to commit suicide in order to wake.
36 After taking damage the afflicted behaves as though under the confusion spell the following round.
37 The afflicted is convinced that everyone else is flirting with them somehow, and they are apalled at how libido-driven everyone seems to be. Ironically, they become terrible at hitting on people.
38 The afflicted does not think they exist anymore and does not believe people can notice, perceive, or interact with them. When spoken to or observed, they don’t believe it—others must be interacting with something nearby. It’s just a coincidence! Physical touch of any type is ignored, and if physically moved or hurt, the afflicted believes they must be hallucinating or having a vivid dream.
39 The afflicted fears law enforcement as they believe that there is a manhunt underway to capture them and convict them of a crime they did not commit.
40 Character develops a compulsion for feeding any creature it sees, with whatever is at hand.
41 The afflicted believes that they know someone of great importance (ideally, someone the PCs are needing to meet/encounteetc.), but they cannot ever lead anyone to this person. They are happy to speak about them, provide insights about this person, and even regale others of stories that involved the two together. However, they can never disclose the physical location of the person or lead others to the person because if they do, they believe they will break their end of some bargain and something terrible will occur.
42 The afflicted character becomes dangerously gullible. Every time they are told a lie roll a d20. On a natural 1 they believe the lie to the point where it is impossible to convince them it is not true.
43 The afflicted character is convinced that they have a beautiful singing voice and often will break into song, much to the chagrin of those around them.
44 The effected hears the voice of their grandmother (or similar familial character) occasionally telling them to kill people.
45 The PC can see and hear other NPC(s) interacting with them sometimes, only they are actually hallucinations. The PC is unaware that they are hallucinations to start out, but may learn that later.
46 The afflicted is plagued by night terrors that comprise of all the ways the afflicted might die that next day. Paranoid to the point of hysteria, they do everything with incredible fear and caution, often mumbling about the many ways whatever they're doing might kill them.
47 The afflicted suddenly "remembers" they are a double agent, meant to strike down whoever the party is working for, and their party members are part of the scheme, just don't remember it.
48 The afflicted becomes overly critical against the party members, and mocks and insults them even for the slightest mistake.
49 The afflicted thinks that party members are close relatives (father, mother, brother etc.)
50 The afflicted has developed a pitiful version of photographic/eidetic memory where they only clearly remember things when in near-death situations, so they actively seek lethal or painful experiences in order to use their incredible recollection abilities.
51 The effected suddenly overcomes an addiction or other character flaw, then suffers a violent outburst 1d4 days later.
52 When you sleep, you dream of a lake of fire. It's the same dream every night. You know it exists somewhere in the world. When you wake, you can feel it pulling you, calling to you. You do everything in your power to travel to this lake. DM decides how far away it is. You know it's the right lake when you get there. Once you arrive, you find it to be very much so not on fire. Take 3d10 psychic damage as you struggle to reconcile this, and the madness ends.
53 Whenever you meet a new character, roll 1d8: 01: You see everything they do in a negative light; 2: You feel compelled to steal from this person, regardless ofthe circumstances. This effect then transfers to them, and they feel compelled to steal from you. It will not transfer again after this; 3: You see the character as being extremely ugly. Make a WIS save. On a failed save, you have disadvantage on all rolls related to anything other than that character, as you're too focused on them; 4:You feel extremely apathetic towards them. You don't care about anything that happens to them, or what they do; 5: You feel compelled to protect the character at all costs, through whatever means you feel will be most effective; 6: you find the character extremely attractive, regardless of their appearance or your sexuality; 7: The character is now your new "best friend". You cannot help but find similarities between the two of you, and you care a great deal about them as a person, as well as their opinion of you. Any compliments or gifts you receive from them are elating, and any insults they give deal 2d4 emotional damage, which heals over 1d6 hours; 8: You feel no special way towards this character.
54 Afflicted develops an uncontrollable fear of water, including ice and bottled water. He may even let himself die of thirst.
55 The effected doesn't feel safe alone, and will panic unless accompanied by another character.
56 The afflicted character believes the next stranger they meet to be a blood relative of theirs. Roll a d20 to see how close of a relative, 20 being an identical twin.
57 The effected develops a pathological hate of ducks.
58 Your character is convinced they are a Lycanthrope, and will seek out a cure. On a full moon, they will shed their clothes and try to bite people. If your character IS a Lycanthrope, they believe they aren't.
59 Character becomes extremely sadistic. Deaths elicit the most laughter - the gorier, the more happiness is achieved.
60 The afflicted finds everything to be absolutely delicious.
61 The afflicted fears catching bad luck. They believe bad luck is contageous through touch and avoid touching others.
62 The afflicted has realized that fate rules everything and nothing is not predestined. They are incredibly melancholic and fatalistic, and they must be driven and prodded into action to do anything other than sigh and accept their fate.
63 The character believes they have an angel on one shoulder, and a demon on the other. Both of which represent a side of their consciousness, and gives their respective advices. The character doesn't know which is which.
64 The person believes to be aging backwards, and getting progressively younger, They mistake signs of senescence for signs of youth.
65 The effected suffers from autocannabalism, and finds the taste of their own flesh more delicious than anything else.
66 Your character will occasionally 'speak to camera', do voiceover narration for events currently occurring, and sometimes speak their thoughts aloud, exactly as though they are a character on a TV show... they believe the Gods are watching their adventures for entertainment.
67 The afflicted has a dream, in which they see their own death, in a rather specific way. The DM decides what the dream is like, so it is exactly like a situation the party will go through. The afflicted then recognizes the scene, and panics.
68 The effected develops a drinking problem.
69 The afflicted starts thinking selfness is the only way to get home alive, and will always choose what is better for him and not for the whole party. He will always refuse to share things.
70 The afflicted is convinced they hold multiple personalities in their psyche, except all the personalities act exactly the same in every respect and the only difference is that each personalities' name differs by one letter.
71 You start with nightmares of charnel hounds catching you and tearing at your flesh. Upon waking you can still hear them growling and breathing behind you. The symptoms become so severe that you hallucinate being attacked by the hounds and can feel pain (1d6 psychic damage) when they bite.
72 The afflicted start going irrational, talking about his past and commenting everything in weird ways, using terms like madness, darkness, void, etc.
73 The afflicted's sense of time is confused. They speak of the past as if it's in the future and has yet to happen. They speak of the future in past tense. And they have very little grasp of the present moment.
74 The afflicted thinks its power became overwhelming, and hardly ever attacks out of fear of breaking the world.
75 The afflicted believes that all bakers are part of a secret society of assassins. They purchase baked goods at every opportunity to make sure they are in good standing with this dangerous group.
76 The person feels like someone is watching them constantly and cause him/her to shoot out random things in any random direction
77 The afflicted thinks every other creature is more powerful than it, and treats them with either respect or fear.
78 The afflicted finds the most inconvenient things to be absolutely hilarious, bursting into cacophonic laughter at the worst times.
79 Character starts worshipping a deity referred to simply as "The Game Master", who supposedly controls everything about the world, except for the party.
80 The afflicted believes that they have an evil twin somewhere in the world who is plotting their demise. They are suspicious of anyone who looks even remotely similar to themselves.
81 The affected believes that they can talk to their weapon. If the affected does not have a weapon, then they believe themselves to be able to communicate with another party members weapon.
82 The person believes they are getting older way faster than others, and that their physical capacities are decreasing as well.
83 The character develops narcolepsy. Every 1d20 hours, roll a 1d8. If the result is 3 or lower, the character falls asleep for 1 hour, and sleepwalks 1d4 x 20 feet in a random direction at any moment during that hour.
84 Your character begins to feel that their self worth is elevated, almost in a euphoric state as their false confidence causes them to be too confident in their abilities.
85 The person is convinced that the end is near, and there's nothing they can do to stop it. So, they decide to live the rest of their days as hedonistically as possible.
86 The afflicted fears that lying in any way spells their end and have become genuine and honest to a fault. They say whatever is on their mind, though with obvious terror, shame, or hesitation.
87 The maddened individual will feel compelled to spout nonsense in the middle of their sentences.
88 Afflicted character's psyche shatters and dissolves as the character starts losing body functions. Roll 1d20 for each of these conditions: Memory loss; Loss of sight; Loss of taste; Loss of touch sense; Loss of hearing; Speech loss; Motor problems; Schizophrenia. The rolls count as a CD10 Constitution check. In case of a fail, roll 1d8 (or any appropriate dice) to determine how many weeks that effect lasts.
89 The afflicted has memory issues. Whenever he needs to remember something, roll a d4. If the result is a 1, the person forgets everything about it.
90 The afflicted is completely convinced that they have been made god over something incredibly small, specific, and pointless, and they make sure everyone knows about their newfound divinity.
91 The afflicted believes they are infallible. They refuse to believe that they are wrong, instead coming with increasingly improbably explanations as to why they were actually correct.
92 The affected pc adopts the personality of another character, and fully believes that they are that character. Lasts until cured, or the effect wears off.
93 The character now only talks in third person.
94 They must save everyone! When asked "from what", the response is "from evil!" before trying to murder everyone.
95 The afflicted is bipolar. Every 1d20 hours, roll 1d10. If the result is even, the person acts overly friendly. If it's odd, the person tends to be aggressive.
96 The afflicted is convinced they know a lot about subjects they only know a little of, and makes a lot of assumptions to fill their knowledge's holes.
97 The victim, in their madness, cannot comprehend words unless spoken completely backwards.
98 The afflicted has seen the errors of popular belief and have decided to be as counter to the norm as possible. They might refer to everything in opposite terms (like saying “down” for “up), wear clothes backwards or upside-down, or in extreme cases, even do the exact opposite of what they think others desire of them.
99 The effected believes everything to be a conspiracy- this town is run by dopplegängers, the king is a dragon in disguise, the Gods aren't real, etc.
100 The afflicted character believes they can beat anyone in a footrace.
101 The inflicted player is convinced their lives and everything in their world is controlled by giant gods that surround them at all times. The PC will occasionally hear giant boulder size rocks roll somewhere, before something happens
102 The afflicted has made a startling realization: everyday is a different holiday! And they mean to celebrate the holiday with the most passion and fervor ever seen.
103 The character thinks they suddenly changed gender.
104 You believe every full moon you turn into a were-rabbit that craves cheese.
105 The afflicted never lets one of their senses function properly because they falsely believe that they are better without that sense. Their self-imposed handicap has become their good luck charm and security blanket, although it actually makes them worse, so they fight tooth-and-nail to never use whatever sense they have shunned.
106 The afflicted obsessively takes up the ambition of being a writer, and they neurotically write everything down for some ambiguous chronicle that they are always working on.
107 The affected becomes addicted to the first smell that reaches their nose. If they are not able to smell it every 12 hours, they become violent.
108 Character develops "Object is God" disorder: first stage, they hear voices. As they tear about, one voice comes through more strongly than the rest, from a certain direction. Whatever the direction, they wander, until a doll or stuff item is found. The voice they've been hearing, "attaches" itself to the item, and "speaks" through it. The item then MUST be obtained. Finally, any choice the inflicted makes must be made through the toy.
109 You now believe you are the physical incarnate of the deity you have devoted your life to. Alternatively for classes not devoted to a deity, you now believe you are a deity worthy of devotion, gain the ability to cast prestidigitation (poorly) to prove your divinity to those foolish enough to question your power!
110 You realize you are in a game, and everything that makes you the person you are is just a collection of numbers and a few sentences on a sheet of paper.
Initial list built by d100. See it here.
List Contributors: u/Arugall, u/Vilfer, u/PaladinUrsa, u/All-American-Zero, u/realdietmrpibb, u/Silverdragon701, u/AlexDuncan7903, u/Radav919, u/eluuvio, u/DragonBolt101, u/elliottruzicka, u/PoTaToMaN2141, u/KatanaKamikaze, u/CasparGlass, u/Blurhy, u/theclassicuno, u/AlDaruma, u/Psychogent30, u/MysticMeow, u/Hwga_lurker_tw, u/faux_glove, u/SeaworthyMango, u/Tskcool, u/caciuccoecostine, u/RecycledEternity, u/Gabrielckc, u/CorrectJeans, NeoBlue42, u/jacobhackman5, u/Blurhy, u/Polinthos_Returned, u/Terence_McKenna, u/FlyingHorseduck
submitted by flyinghorseduck to d120Lists [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 17:28 SalivatingMoron Reptile vets in RI?

Hello all, can anyone recommend a good vet for reptiles in RI. Many places say they treat reptiles, but it's hard to know how good they are at it. Specifically for a bearded dragon. Thank you!
submitted by SalivatingMoron to RhodeIsland [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 17:27 No-Count3834 Saw show is coming up this Saturday by me. Has anyone done the VIP meet and greet?

I’ve seen David before in 2002, and it was a great show! Pretty much a standing room area, and an indie rock band opened. Been a big fan since the Mr.Show days with him and Bob.
I’m thinking of going to the Saturday night show here in Nola by me last min. Tickets are fare at $40, but saw they have decent priced VIP/Meet and Greet tickets. Has anyone done this before? What was the experience?
The info reads:
“Priority Seating! Hang out, chat, mingle, and scat backstage with David and all of his hilarious puppets. Eat all of his green room snacks. Take his beer. Regale David with tales of being mistaken for him, take pics, and/or pose for erotic velvet paintings with him. You can even secretly pluck one of his lucky beard hairs and take it home with you and perhaps it will grant you a wish! Take a post-show shower with him and his puppets and all the other VIPers. The sky's the limit!”
submitted by No-Count3834 to davidcross [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 17:12 RobJHayes Self Published Fantasy Releases – April 2023

Self Published Fantasy Releases – April 2023
You can find the original post complete with all the shiny covers here.
If you would like to be kept up to date with the upcoming lists, please subscribe to my newsletter by clicking this link. I don’t send out letters too often, pretty much once a month when this list goes out… and occasionally if I release a book or something.
As always, this is not a comprehensive list, but only includes all the books I have heard about so far.
If you have a fantasy novel you are self publishing in April or beyond, let me know by filling out THIS FORM, and I shall add it to the page. There are but 3 requirements:
1) It must be a self published fantasy novel.
2) It must have a Goodreads page.
3) It must have a cover.

1st April – The Rascor Plains (Immortal Great Souls #2) by Phil Tucker

Scorio thought victory was within his grasp. He had bested the Final Gauntlet and overcome the treachery of Chancellor Praximar. But the Rascor Plains are full of peril, and his quest for truth has only just begun.
With his friends scattered and his reputation in tatters, Scorio must navigate a web of intrigue that stretches from the powerful House Hydra and the Fiery Shoals to the mysterious forces that govern the Plains. He will face foes both human and inhuman, and confront the darkest secrets of his world.
Beware the fiends, for they hunger for your soul. Beware your allies, for they may break your heart. And beware Scorio, for he will stop at nothing to uncover the truth.

1st April – The System Apocalyse Short Story ANTHOLOGY #2 by Various Authors

Dashing tales of heroics and everyday life abound in the second System Apocalypse short story anthology. Competing alien and human settlements clash, and a simple party planner is caught between in After Party. A New York trashman and his friend fight off loan sharks and exploit the System for gain, finding treasure among others garbage in Completely Trashed and a prisoner must decide between his humanity and humanity itself in WWMRD?
With over ten stories from exciting new voices and a few veterans of the universe, the second anthology highlights the lives and struggles of humanity’s best and worst years after System advent.
The second System Apocalypse short story anthology takes place between books 4 and 6 and covers years two to six during that period.

2nd April – Sul: From Gold to Iron and Rust (Sulaai #1) by Jacqui Davis & Katy Grierson

Epic Fantasy
A king destined to rule. A priest determined to protect his land. A demon out to Create chaos. A princess with her eyes on the throne.
When a demon murders the regent, young King Elmes leaves his island palace and sails north to conquer a frozen wilderness rich in resources his people have squandered –and of course, hunt down the demon. Elmes has no doubt he’ll prevail. After all, he is great like his ancestors.
But the land is already home to half-wild barbarians led by an immortal priest, who are used to weather more savage than any warrior. With a court losing confidence and a wife set on keeping the crown no matter whose head it sits on, the decisions at home prove the greater danger.
With mounting threats on all sides, Elmes wins his empire, but his arrogance leaves him cursed and trapped in the north. Without his armies, his magic, or even his own name, Elmes must face his selfishness and irresponsibility to preserve what truly matters: his young son’s life.

4th April – The Ruptured Sky (Gardens of War & Wasteland #1) by Jessica A. McMinn

Epic Fantasy, Grimdark, Sword & Sorcery
A dead goddess. A broken sky. A world wasted by magic.
Princess Amikharlia wants one thing in life: control of her own fate.
On the eve of her wedding, Amika flees her homeland, seeking the truth behind the mysterious magical abilities she’d kept hidden since childhood.
Taking up the life of a demon huntress, Amika uncovers a madman’s prophecy that would have her revive an ancient goddess—and destroy the world in the process.
Will Amika become a pawn in another man’s game or continue her fight against destiny’s shackles?
As a dark and dangerous power begins to rise, she must make her choice soon.
But is laying the world to waste truly the way to save it?

4th April – The Captain (The Last Horizon #1) by Will Wight

Science Fantasy
“To survive in this galaxy, you need a wand in one hand and a gun in the other.”
On a little-known planet, Archmage Varic Vallenar casts a grand spell to empower himself with the magical abilities of his alternate selves. The ritual works too well, granting Varic not only the magic but also the memories from six lives.
Including their gruesome deaths.
Now, Varic has power greater than any wizard in galactic history, but he knows that won’t be enough. The enemies he faced in those alternate lives were apocalyptic in scale. Terrors of technology and magic. Nothing that he, or anyone, can defeat.
Sun-eating extra-dimensional insects, shadowy secret organizations, genetically enhanced alien super-soldiers, ruthless mega-corporations, and hordes of cyborg undead all lurk in the darkest corners of the galaxy, and Varic knows that any of them can become a world-ending threat at any moment.
All these are beyond any wizard, no matter how many spells he’s mastered or how many interstellar warships he’s rallied to his cause. Hopeless, Varic finds himself trying to preserve what little he can from the coming doom.
Until he hears rumors of a mythical starship, an invincible vessel of heroes made to do battle against galactic threats.
A ship called The Last Horizon.

14th April – Gates of Hope (Aulirean Gates #1) by J E Hannaford

Epic Fantasy
The Watcher shattered the Gates.
Now hope must arise from the shards.
Darin and Suriin enter the Black Palace of the So’Dal, at a time when monstrous Edgelands creatures return to the skies over Caldera. After exhibiting magical traits thought lost, Darin is drawn into a secret society charged with keeping the Watcher’s secrets. Now he must balance learning to control his magic, caring for Star, his new companion, and finding a way to sustain the Howlers’ power for long enough to protect Caldera from the predatory creatures of the Edgelands.
Before she arrived at the Black Palace Suriin broke the ancient rules of the So’Dal to save the life of the person she loves the most. As her search for a cure delves deeper under the mountain, is there any price she won’t pay?
On the outer moon of Tebein, Elissa’s newly awakened magic will endanger her home and family. Now she must race to find help for those she leaves behind as she escapes those who want her, and all those like her, dead.
One wrong decision by any of them could return legends to life and end five hundred cycles of peace. Will they find the solutions they need in time?

15th April – The Captain (Battle Brothers #2) by Casey Hollingshead

Grimdark, Sword & Sorcery
“You wish to talk rumors? Where would I even begin? I have heard of direwolves, lindwurms, dragons, nachzehrers, webknechts, and a wiederganger at the hip of a black clad cultist. Hells, I once received a tale that the trees themselves came alive and skewered men dead with branches shaped like spears! Richter, please, the laity love to talk about all the ghouls and ghosts these woods hold, but until you see it with your own eyes…”
Now captain of a struggling mercenary company, Richter von Dagentear takes on a dangerous brigand known as Kantorek, ‘the King of Dragons.’ But bandits and thieves are not all that roam the forests. With a witch hunter’s hat atop his head and a sellsword’s blade at his hip, Richter must recruit and equip a ragtag group of fighters to not only complete contracts, but survive what evils lurk beyond the trees.

20th April – Twice Upon a Name ANTHOLOGY (Tales of Mix Ups and Mistaken Identities) by Various Authors

Double the name and double the magic, mystery, and mayhem
Once upon a time, a fairy tale name generator issued a challenge to a group of authors. Volume Two of these quirky stories brings double trouble.
In this clean YA anthology, spy on thieves discovering their princely identities, accompany villains seeking redemption along with accident-prone geese, and rejoice in the reunion of siblings separated at birth. Side with twins split between good and evil, giggle over mistaken identities, and discover the secrets of royal doppelgängers. When fates are intertwined by a namesake, mayhem and mischief are sure to follow.
Venture into this collection of adventurous stories by award-winning and up-and-coming authors and see if what happens once . . . happens twice!
Pssst…some characters from Once Upon A Name might make a comeback, but the two sets and all stories in them can be read as standalones.

25th April – Spire Climbers (Titan Hoppers #2) by Rob J. Hayes

Progression/Cultivation, Science Fantasy
Even Titans Can Bleed.
Iro and Emil have opened their first Gates, unlocked new talents, and proved the fleet’s Hoppers aren’t stalled. Despite leaving the rank of trainee, they find their training is just beginning.
Thrown into a new squad with an explosive Mage, a cursed Surveyor, and a Vanguard with shady motives, Iro and Emil will delve deeper into the titan than ever before. There are bizarre things in the depths; pitch black oceans, nests of swarming monsters, and Spires that rip through the hull of the titan.
But what purpose do the Spires serve and can Iro and Emil reach the top in time?

28th April – The Shadow Gate (Dragon Spirits #2) by L.L. MacRae

Epic Fantasy
Opening the shadow gate is the only way Fenn’s memories can be restored—and with them, his life and family.
It could also destroy the world.
Guided by dragon spirit Hassen and manipulated by the Myr, Fenn fights the corruption spreading through Tassar—and himself—in an attempt to find his family. Separated from his allies and unable to trust even his own mind, the arduous journey takes its toll.
Far from home and reunited with her sister, Calidra battles to keep her loved ones safe. But when the fickle loyalties of dragon spirits shifts, and darkness lurks around every corner, running from her fears is no longer an option.
And in the far south, consequences of the past catch up with those fighting for their freedom.

28th April – Elder Epoch (Gunmetal Gods #3) by Zamil Akhtar

Epic Fantasy, Grimdark
The protector of the land is dead.
A blood plague infests the soil and sea, eldritch angels vie for dominion over hearts and souls, and holy war boils between four gunpowder empires.
The line between truth and falsehood, the righteous and the wicked, hope and annihilation is buried deep beneath blood-soaked sand.
Space for more...
submitted by RobJHayes to Fantasy [link] [comments]

2023.03.30 17:03 OstrichBurgers I'm sure this isn't an original idea but I wish rocket grunts had more variety in their speech

So last night walking my dog, I encountered a grunt and it was a fire type grunt and I got to thinking that some of the things that the grunts say in order for the player to discern which type they are are either lame or lazy. Like the fire one, "Do you know how hot fire Pokemon breath can get?" I personally think is lazy, there's no character, especially compared to, for example, the ghost one "" which is a cool throwback to the mediums from the mainline games.
I'd like to see more variety in that identifying phrase a grunt says in their dialogue before the battle begins;

Do you know how hot fire Pokemon breath can get?
Prepare to get burnt!
Ready to catch this smoke?
I'm burning for a fight!

These waters are treacherous!
I'm gunna wash you away!
We're gonna rain on your parade!

Don't tangle with us!
Check out these razor sharp leaves!

Go, my super bug pokemon!
Careful around the pincers!
Prepare to be swarmed!

You're no match for my iron will!
I've got buns of steel!

Battle against my flying type Pokemon!
Ready to take flight?
Take to the skies!

You think this buff physique is just for show?
I've been training just for this...

Let's rock and roll!
Kick rocks, bud!
I'm going to ruin you!

You're gonna be frozen in your tracks!
Chill out! I just want to talk..

Are you scared of psychics that use unseen power?
I forsee... your defeat!
I can tell your every move!

ke... ke... ke... ke...
Boo! Did you get scared?
Don't turn around...
I'll show you something to be scared of!

Get ready to be shocked!
Fully charged and ready for battle!

Check out my cute pokemon!
I've always been told I'm quite charming...

Coiled and ready to strike!
You're looking a little sickly.
Do you feel a tickle in your throat?

ROAR.. How'd that sound?

You'll be defeated into the ground!
You're gonna eat dirt!
Your sandcastle looks terrible!

Wherever there is light, there is also darkness.
From the shadows, I come!
I lurk in the shadows, ready to fight!

Normal does not mean weak.
There's nothing normal about these Pokemon!
Normal?! I'll show you normal...
submitted by OstrichBurgers to TheSilphRoad [link] [comments]