Period: 730.39 days

	Submissions	Comments
Total	1000	24716
Rate (per day)	1.37	33.80
Unique Redditors	571	3006
Combined Score	83968	106679

Top Submitters' Top Submissions

1. 3488 points, 47 submissions: Adwai1h
   
   1. One of the Dream Machines growing up. Lucky to experience it. (131 points, 12 comments)
   2. I was 5 years old when Dhoom came out, now 17 years later I finally got to ride the Hayabusa:) (125 points, 20 comments)
   3. :) (119 points, 27 comments)
   4. Night Ride - Honda XR250 & RE Continental GT 650 (112 points, 19 comments)
   5. mY bEaSt (111 points, 40 comments)
   6. This Sub's Favourite Bike (107 points, 13 comments)
   7. Hi Bangalore:) - RE GT650 (103 points, 10 comments)
   8. Pictured: Man escaping responsibilities riding off in the night. (101 points, 13 comments)
   9. Fine! I did it, CB350, You guys wouldn't stay quiet so I rented one. (94 points, 22 comments)
   10. rain rain go away 😪 (93 points, 23 comments)
2. 2017 points, 16 submissions: avi7611
   
   1. Booked my Triumph Street Triple R 2022 carbon black on my 23rd birthday. It’s a dream come true 😀. Please bless my bike with your eyes (231 points, 60 comments)
   2. I don’t care if you call this bike ugly, This is one of the best looking for me. Triumph Street triple R (231 points, 85 comments)
   3. You can’t ignore these beauties. Every inch of these bikes are pure delicacy. (175 points, 43 comments)
   4. Enjoy this affordable beauty Continental GT 650 (164 points, 20 comments)
   5. Best Ducati panigale wrap I’ve seen. (154 points, 17 comments)
   6. A sunset ride POV on my Street Triple R 🌅 (140 points, 22 comments)
   7. Everytime i get off my bike I can’t keep myself from looking it back and admire for 2 mins. (139 points, 13 comments)
   8. And we are finally here bros 2022 STREET TRIPLE R - One of the naughtiest thing i own (138 points, 26 comments)
   9. There’s no Doubt that this is one of the most beautiful bike ever made. Daytona 675 (131 points, 13 comments)
   10. The photos i used to dream are now the photos i click by my hands. I hope everyone get their dream bike soon :) (121 points, 4 comments)
3. 1223 points, 21 submissions: jaymanshere18
   
   1. A sunset on the trails Hero Xpulse 200 (105 points, 8 comments)
   2. My dad chasing me, then me chasing him. 🥵🥵 Hero Xpulse 200 Stock vs Hero Karizma built for rally use. (96 points, 8 comments)
   3. It's a beautiful life. :) (84 points, 8 comments)
   4. Bought myself the Alpinestars SM8! India. (83 points, 28 comments)
   5. Hi, I am an artist who races rallies for fun. Currently, I'm preparing for my 5th rally on my third bike, and the one I like the most - the Hero Xpulse BS4 (Carb); I also ride trails and do off road centric tours. This post is inspired by u/arcaneformula and would love to talk to y'all - AMA! (70 points, 39 comments)
   6. Somewhere under the same sun, a couple weekends ago. Hero Xpulse 200, NCR. (67 points, 9 comments)
   7. Successfully finished the SJOBA Rally 2022. The rally was a big learning for me, the second day I couldn’t even focus on the track because of a tired mind. Felt defeated knowing I only rode 30% of my capabilities. Picked myself back up and saw some retribution on the last day. (67 points, 15 comments)
   8. Kisouma and I are ready to race the SJOBA Rally 2022! Wish us luck. ⚡️ (63 points, 4 comments)
   9. some photos from this year’s SJOBA Rally. Hero Xpulse 200. (54 points, 6 comments)
   10. I recently shot a commercial for a small company, this is a little edit I made from that footage. Hero Xpulse 200. (53 points, 10 comments)
4. 889 points, 9 submissions: SnooPeripherals2168
   
   1. Honda Rune (213 points, 34 comments)
   2. Indian FTR1200, stuff of dreams. (152 points, 47 comments)
   3. Zx12R that i checked out for a friend (116 points, 21 comments)
   4. Absolutely gorgeous (99 points, 20 comments)
   5. My favourite livery by Honda (85 points, 16 comments)
   6. Race preped Daytona! (81 points, 8 comments)
   7. from the archives (60 points, 2 comments)
   8. Gone but never forgotten. (42 points, 8 comments)
   9. Fun little package from Ducati (41 points, 0 comments)
5. 864 points, 12 submissions: Terryted
   
   1. finally found some time to wash few of the bikes .. (138 points, 33 comments)
   2. Came across a childhood photo of me thought I’d share it . That’s a old Yamaha V-Star by the way . (132 points, 27 comments)
   3. Africa twin ft cat on the thar ✌🏻 (87 points, 14 comments)
   4. Took some styling cues from the game 😂 .. Yamaha R6 hands down one of my fav bikes to ride on BIC(Buddh International Circuit) (77 points, 19 comments)
   5. Took the RD for a ride after a really long time . She still gives me goosebumps.❤️ (74 points, 14 comments)
   6. They say that weekends usually go by really fast i kid you not this weekend is fast!! at the California superbikes school. MMRT (72 points, 10 comments)
   7. Cb 650 ❤️ (56 points, 19 comments)
   8. Chapter 3 of California Superbikes School This time with the FZ6n (55 points, 4 comments)
   9. Fun Sunday ride - ft street 750 , interceptor and Honda shadow (52 points, 9 comments)
   10. It's raining two strokes😅 💨Yamaha RD350 , Yezdi Roadking (43 points, 1 comment)
6. 764 points, 15 submissions: Top_Coast_8709
   
   1. Yes we exist (85 points, 27 comments)
   2. Whenever I feel depressed I take her out and head to a Chai spot outside town. Works better than therapy ❤️ (73 points, 7 comments)
   3. Heading to the beach to celebrate 10k kms with her ❤️ (57 points, 12 comments)
   4. 10k completed with bae 🤝 enjoyed every second of it (56 points, 8 comments)
   5. They didn’t give us a duke 200 adventure so tried to make do with what i got 🥲 (53 points, 15 comments)
   6. Does this qualify as an hour glass figure? (50 points, 18 comments)
   7. New Skin for Smaug (49 points, 6 comments)
   8. Whatchu lookin at? (47 points, 8 comments)
   9. Celebrating 2 year anniversary with my baby ❤️ She was my first, one that I earned after a lot of grind. I still remember those countless YT videos of deliveries and reviews of the duke. Throughout college life I drooled over owning this beast. I still can’t believe this became a reality ❤️ (45 points, 7 comments)
   10. Completed two awesome years with my first self owned machine :’) what a blast its been (44 points, 13 comments)
7. 763 points, 8 submissions: gaurav_kumrawat
   
   1. Ride for today ;) (226 points, 25 comments)
   2. 11000kms in 5 months with this beast, loving it so far. AMA (126 points, 40 comments)
   3. Making the most of out weekend :) (90 points, 8 comments)
   4. 6000Kms on it, AMA (83 points, 29 comments)
   5. Surprised by how effortlessly it does 160 kmph and really stable too. (66 points, 13 comments)
   6. A day spent well (62 points, 30 comments)
   7. Love riding this bike (61 points, 10 comments)
   8. Weekend Ride with this single cylinder beast. (49 points, 8 comments)
8. 723 points, 10 submissions: octanekarnige
   
   1. Six years and over a lakh kilometres later. (155 points, 39 comments)
   2. The Best Bang For Buck I've Experienced (149 points, 41 comments)
   3. Saving an old workhorse from the scrapyard. My hand built lockdown project. Mod list in comment section! (80 points, 22 comments)
   4. Travelled from Delhi to Banglore for a trackday at Aruani Grid. The R15V4 is the perfect tool to hone your skills. (62 points, 20 comments)
   5. Picked up the Rally Edition. Genuinely impressed with the suspension setup after calibration to my weight. Can't wait to fiddle around with this and bolt on some performance parts. (61 points, 9 comments)
   6. Soaking in the sun. (48 points, 6 comments)
   7. The Old Gurgaon Experience 💀 (44 points, 6 comments)
   8. RC × RC × RC (43 points, 5 comments)
   9. 3 Months & 5000 kilometres later. AMA (41 points, 26 comments)
   10. One of Yamah's lesser appreciated gems. Been my workhorse for over 6 pleasurable years. (40 points, 9 comments)
9. 660 points, 9 submissions: Manyyack
   
   1. Office Friends gifted me these :') (131 points, 36 comments)
   2. Ride to Pondicherry. Can't explain how much I love this bike. P.S Ignore the wind noise. (129 points, 31 comments)
   3. Next : 8008 (77 points, 13 comments)
   4. Mornings like this. Free advice : Do not underestimate the weather and leave your Winter Jacket at home. Same video from Pondicherry ride. Was completely foggy and poor visibility till 7 AM. (75 points, 44 comments)
   5. The Topper and the Backbencher of the sub on way to Pondicherry (57 points, 11 comments)
   6. Completed 1K KM on this! Absolutely in love with it. AMA if you want. (52 points, 70 comments)
   7. I bought this Beauty today. (52 points, 15 comments)
   8. POV : You develop a crush on someone most hated and love them despite all of their shortcomings and flaws. (44 points, 23 comments)
   9. Shots from recent Ooty Trip. What a bike it is, absolutely love it ! (43 points, 19 comments)
10. 557 points, 4 submissions: ChumbaWambah
    
    1. TVS Ronin Scrambler mod by TVS at Moto Soul event, Goa (217 points, 45 comments)
    2. TN Patrol Cops official vehicle of choice. The Gixxer SF. (154 points, 25 comments)
    3. The about to be globally unveiled Harley-Davidson X350 (131 points, 80 comments)
    4. Le BMW G310 GS's first service invoice for your perusal (55 points, 53 comments)

Top Commenters

1. Adwai1h (1768 points, 542 comments)
2. Why_when_where (976 points, 78 comments)
3. Born_Night_8797 (879 points, 109 comments)
4. vitviki (771 points, 166 comments)
5. ilurkilearntoo (771 points, 141 comments)
6. DrazeGamer (732 points, 136 comments)
7. KingsmanVishnu (719 points, 139 comments)
8. ittybittypitykitty (560 points, 52 comments)
9. Apeeksiht (543 points, 59 comments)
10. Manishimself (538 points, 68 comments)

Top Submissions

1. Going to get some dhaniya akira style. by DUST_2196 (461 points, 68 comments)
2. Anatomy of a “Chapri” (from Biturbo Media YouTube) by deleted (417 points, 109 comments)
3. We believe in Activa Supremacy. by itsmerachit (369 points, 28 comments)
4. Dominar, RR310 owners.. relatable? by matthrwmurdock (356 points, 72 comments)
5. My Ride to College by Beginning-Wolf-2864 (330 points, 51 comments)
6. I bought my first bike today! ♥️ by SummaOruAccount (322 points, 82 comments)
7. Bike for sale. Some scratches. Serious buyers only by adblr (305 points, 37 comments)
8. Had to stop and record an extremely important milestone. by KedPd (298 points, 42 comments)
9. Had no clue where I was headed but this was definitely something worth getting down and capturing on the phone. Absolutely surreal experience... by TheDarkKnight04 (295 points, 27 comments)
10. GT650 on the beautiful roads of A & N Islands by Rackjack26 (290 points, 48 comments)

Top Comments

1. 148 points: ittybittypitykitty's comment in Why do people name their bikes?
2. 145 points: DrazeGamer's comment in The bike will be locked inside for about a month, any measures i should keep in mind before leaving it ?
3. 130 points: EvilMorty_x-137's comment in Sold my Ninja to buy aYamaha Aerox. AMA
4. 122 points: PranavBhosale's comment in Meeting up with u/me_is_dumb_dumb from this sub reddit for weekend ride!
5. 121 points: Why_when_where's comment in your opinion on the E20 launch? you in the right mind would ruin the expensive engines with this adulterated fuel?
6. 115 points: Pam_Schrute's comment in Hey guys, I want some recommendations for a good bike for 2.5L or less. I'm a college student and going to take Loan to buy it. I mostly prefer those relaxed cruisers, I love the way it feels. Any type of bike rec is welcome. thanks in advance
7. 112 points: shim_niyi's comment in Anatomy of a “Chapri” (from Biturbo Media YouTube)
8. 107 points: witty_sperm's comment in what a beautiful sight!
9. 106 points: InitiativeTrue9583's comment in Dreams vs finance dilemma
10. 106 points: almighty_dev's comment in Got duke 200 as my first bike , gotta embrace the inner chapri ig🤷‍♂️

Generated with BBoe's Subreddit Stats

This is a summary of Digital Daily #15 (March 26th). Detailed are events that happen after the POV comp leading up to the POV ceremony. Please no spoilers beyond this digital daily in the comments.
Pre-Digital Daily: Kuzie nominated Santina and Hope. The winner of the POV is Hope.
TL;DR:
Will Kuzie make a big move this week? Or do what Ty wants… Digital Daily #15 kicks off in the HOH room, where Kuzie speaks with POV winner Hope. Kuzie asks him questions so she can figure out who her replacement nominee will be; assuming Hope uses the veto on himself, the replacement nominee will sit next to Santina. During this convo, Hope confirms to Kuzie that he was the 4th vote to keep Roberto in the house. Later, we learn from an unhappy Daniel in a talk with Anika that Zach is Kuzie’s likely replacement nominee and target. Anika wants the replacement nominee to be Ty, as she sees Ty as the glue that keeps the guys alliance together. Later, Hope confesses his 4th vote secret to Renee. Meanwhile, Anika approaches Kuzie with an attempt at getting Ty on the block in stead of Zach. Kuzie reveals that Ty thinks of Anika as disposable. Anika fails to get Kuzie to consider Ty as a target, as Kuzie only gives reasons to target Zach. Later, Ty approaches Kuzie to hear her plan; they become frustrated with each other, as Ty desperately wants Zach, and to a lesser extent, Dan, to stay off the block, but those are Kuzie’s main options right now. They talk in circles but neither budge. After this discussion, Ty goes to Hope with the idea of Hope using the veto on Santina, not himself. Ty then tells Zach of his possible nomination, which rattles him while he’s trying to work out.
Going into detail…
0:00:07 - HOH - Kuzie Speaks with the POV Winner
Kuzie asks Hope what his thoughts are on Renee. Hope: “she’s very trustworthy.” Kuzie asks if Hope is close with Shanaya. Hope says in every conversation he’s had with her, they are close, but it’s never been game-related. Kuzie: “so Shanaya would not be horrible to get out, but don’t touch Renee.” Kuzie says she likes Renee, but she wonders why 2 people have put her on the block already; what did the other HOHs see? Kuzie: “then I’m looking at Dan and I’m saying ‘this guy has absolutely no plans for me in his life.’” Kuzie says the sensible thing for her would be to backdoor Dan this week. Hope: “between you and me, about the whole JM situation: I wish Ty never saved Anika off the block. Because I feel like JM could have done a lot of big in this game. I wish he stayed.” Hope thanks Kuzie for putting him on the block because his POV win yesterday is motivating him to win another comp. Ty literally barges in without knocking. Kuzie apparently gives him a face because he walks right back out. Hope also won $5,000 in the comp. Hope asks Kuzie if she trusts Daniel/Anika. Kuzie trusts that they are genuine, but she’s not sure how hard they will play. Hope calls Daniel a real one: “outside of here, I want to be friends with him.” Kuzie trusts that Jonathan is a good person. Hope: “I don’t know how he is going to survive in this game.” Hope says he (Hope) is with Kuzie from now on; he says again that this POV win has given him a new purpose in the house. Hope: “whatever move you make, I’m with you 100%.” Hope about his vote for Roberto: “you know the truth about that obviously.” Kuzie: “yeah.” Hope: “I couldn’t tell anyone.” Hope says he could tell that Kuzie knew when she said she “didn’t care” who voted and they shared a look. Hope says he changed his vote last second. Kuzie: “spilt milk.” Zach barges in (without knocking); Hope motions for him to stay and that they are done talking. Zach asks Hope when he wants to lift. Hope leaves and Zach stays with Kuzie.
0:11:16 - Parlour - Anika & Daniel React to Kuzie’s Plans
Anika tells Daniel why she thinks Ty should be the next target: without Ty, Santina/Zach won’t work together; Ty also has influence on Claudia. Daniel says Ty has to go, but Kuzie would never do it: “there’s no fighting it anymore, it’s gonna be Zach.” Daniel says he will not vote Zach out over Santina, even if it destroys his chance at alliances. Daniel says if they get rid of Zach and keep Ty, they (Daniel/Anika) are still gonna be the targets since Ty won’t come after Claudia and her friends. Anika says Ty would go after Renee and Shanaya. Daniel asks how she knows. Anika says because Ty knows Renee is close with Claudia, so he wants Renee to leave before they get closer. Anika remembers to tell Daniel about a conversation she had with Ty last night: Anika says Ty approached her about why she was feeling stressed, and started asking game questions. Anika responded: “you know what Ty, I can’t trust you enough right now to tell you that” and added that Ty is always talking game with Santina and Zach, not her. Anika stresses that Ty is the person that connects that big alliance. Daniel says he had a relationship with Santina, but then she blew them up as a group, and now they are keeping her? Anika says it’s about perspective. Daniel: “I get it, I get it.” Daniel says he is upset at Santina because her pitch to get rid of Zach was that she doesn’t like what Zach is doing with Daniel: “I’m a grown ass man. Everyone needs to stop protecting me.” Daniel says on a game-level, he’s pissed. Daniel reveals that he is conflicted about the information Santina told him; either Santina is 100% lying or Zach can’t be trusted at all. Daniel says the house is going to be so boring (without Zach). Daniel says he just needs a day of misery, and Anika leaves.
0:19:36 - Purple Bedroom - Talk Later?
Anika joins Hope/Renee in the bedroom. Daniel enters momentarily then leaves. Renee leaves, and before Hope exits he tells Anika they need to have some one-on-one time. Anika agrees.
0:22:10 - Hot Tub - Socializing
Daniel joins Shanaya/Claudia/Zach outside.
0:22:39 - Library - Hope Confesses to Renee
Hope/Renee continue to talk about Hope’s age. [honestly I’m getting bored of his “what age am I??” talk]. They play pool and focus on the game for a while. Then Hope says he is just going to play an honest game. Hope: “I feel like you know me.” Renee says she has a pretty good understanding of who he is. Hope: “so I guess you know the truth about that 4th vote…” Renee: “was it Zach?” Hope: “…” Renee: “it was you?” Hope says it was a pity vote. Renee: “oh, well at least you’re honest about it.” Renee asks if Zach/Ty know. Hope says yes. Renee asks if the 3rd vote was Vanessa. Hope says no, he doesn’t think so [it was]. Renee asks if the guys were mad when Hope told them how he voted. Hope says he just explained that it was his friend: “I’m not good at lying.” Renee says Hope cannot give a pity vote moving forward, starting this week with whatever Kuzie wants to do.
0:32:31 - HOH - Anika Tries to Sway Kuzie
Anika approaches Kuzie about nominating Ty instead of Zach. Kuzie says one of her reasons for wanting to get rid of Zach is “not that I want to weaken Daniel,” but it would make Daniel a better ally for them since he won’t be on the fence. Anika tells Kuzie about her conversation with Ty last night; Ty tried to get Anika information from Anika and Anika went off on him about not being able to trust him. Anika says Ty said he stopped talking game with Santina after week 1; Kuzie says that’s not true. Anika goes on to say that Ty said Anika was so smart and he wants to work with her etc. Kuzie: “Anika. He has said your name to me. He said if he gets HOH you are going on the block.” Kuzie tries to reassure Anika by saying that if those 3-4 people (Zach’s side) want to target the 5-6 leftovers, they would target Kuzie first. Kuzie says she told Ty straight up that she doesn’t care if her nominating Dan will hurt Ty’s numbers. Dan enters to listen to Kuzie’s music while he does cardio. Anika looks annoyed. Dan goes to the bathroom area and Kuzie/Anika continue whispering. Anika says that if Ty stays, he will control that side by being the glue. Kuzie asks Anika to look at the game morally. Kuzie says Zach angers her, Ty scares her. She would happily lose to Ty, not Zach. Anika asks if Kuzie told Ty about nominating Zach at the upcoming POV ceremony. Kuzie says no. Kuzie adds that Zach has been telling Renee “you’re lucky you have a pretty face.” Kuzie asks what kind of a stupid comment is that. Anika says Ty will come after herself though. Kuzie says Ty will target Renee and Kuzie before Anika. Kuzie says Zach is grimy. Kuzie says people have been telling her that Ty will be against her after this move. Anika brings up what Kuzie revealed earlier: “Ty really suggested to you my name? Like as a pawn or the target?” Kuzie says as a pawn. Kuzie: “like you’re not a target but you’re disposable to him.” Jonathan enters for a minute then he leaves. Anika whispers that Hope needs to go too; also Kuzie should also be careful of Renee. Kuzie repeats herself about Zach playing a dirty game. Anika agrees that Zach can go this week but Ty has to go soon. Kuzie agrees to that. Anika says once Zach and Ty are gone, it will be an even playing field for everyone. Kuzie says if they come to her and threaten her about not having any physical players on her side, she doesn’t care; Jonathan is a physical player, and if Kuzie can talk to Santina well enough, she could be on her side. Anika advises Kuzie not to tell anyone about her plan to nominate Zach. Anika leaves the room.
0:54:52 - Living Room - Ty Wants to Talk
Kuzie leaves the HOH room. Ty sees her leaving and tells her to get her “ass back in there.” He wants to talk with her. Kuzie says she is making her rounds so she will get Ty when she comes back to the room. They split up. Ty whispers to Santina that he will tell her what they (Ty/Kuzie) talk about later.
0:56:54 - Hot Tub - Comp Talk
Renee/Claudia/Ty/Daniel hang out outside. Small talk about the HOH comp and previous comps.
1:01:24 - Backyard - Working Out
Shanaya/Anika work out in the backyard while Zach/Hope hang out nearby. They talk about about working out. Dan is also working out in the backyard. Anika helps Shanaya with her lifting form. Hope whispers to Zach that early in the game he told Anika that he would keep Vanessa around because she cooks. Ever since then, Anika has been cooking big breakfasts. Hope laughs.
1:17:15 - HOH - Kuzie & Ty Debate
Kuzie and Ty meet to talk. Kuzie says she is a calm person until she gets irritated. Ty says they are the same person. Kuzie says Zach is trying to make her feel stupid; in no world can anyone convince Kuzie that taking out Renee is a good HOH move. Kuzie declares that Renee will not be going on the block. Kuzie says at this point, she is looking at Dan or Zach as the replacement nominee. Kuzie says Kuzie/Ty can protect each other, not each other’s people; Kuzie will always vouch for Ty, but she can’t promise she will protect Zach just because they are friends. Kuzie mentions she was talking to Daniel last night, and Daniel burst into tears at the thought of Zach going on the block. Kuzie asks Ty to put his game into mind, and ask himself if he would make a weak move like Renee during his HOH week. Ty says everyone is expecting Renee to go up because she is an easy option since she’s been up twice. Ty defends Zach for pushing the Renee idea because everyone was thinking it anyway. Ty warns that if she puts Dan up, Kuzie will lose Zach. Ty tries to float the idea of evicting Hope instead, but Kuzie reminds him Hope isn’t eligible since he got POV (assuming he uses it on himself). Ty says he would consider voting Dan out if he was on the block, he wouldn’t consider voting out Zach. Kuzie says if she decides to nominate Zach, she will have the numbers with or without Ty’s vote. Ty says it’s too early to get Zach out. Ty argues that you don’t have to make big moves on an HOH to make big moves in the house. Talking in circles, Ty is desperate to change Kuzie’s mind about Zach or Dan. Kuzie doesn’t budge. Ty says Renee is an indirect threat to Kuzie. Kuzie: “I’m not going for indirect, I’m going for direct. I’m going for direct threats.” Ty tries to scare Kuzie by asking what happens if she nominates Dan, Santina gets evicted, and then Dan becomes HOH next week? Kuzie: “let’s not focus on Dan, let’s focus on Zach.” Ty: “obviously I’m closer to Zach, so I’m not gonna offer him up to you.” Ty asks his question again. Kuzie says “then that’s okay.” Kuzie adds that she didn’t come here to hide. Kuzie: “if this was your HOH, you wouldn’t consider half the things you are saying.” Kuzie says Ty is the biggest player in the game but she won’t come after him because he is straight-forward; Dan gives Kuzie nothing, and Zach gives her lies. Kuzie says as smart as Ty thinks Zach is, she promises she can think that same way and be an asset to Ty. Ty asks if Kuzie wants to go to the end with a bunch of weak players. Kuzie says everyone doesn’t know everything about everyone in the house; some people might think Ty is playing a “weak game” if they don’t know what he has done. They have a moment of loud frustration; Ty tries to twist Kuzie’s words but she doesn’t allow it. Ty asks Kuzie to keep her calm with him. Kuzie says Renee isn’t connected to any guys in the house, so Kuzie can possibly “work” Renee down the line. Ty says Kuzie shouldn’t nominate Dan then since he is connected to Shanaya, by that logic. Kuzie: “don’t bring that in here. We aren’t talking about Dan.” Ty accuses Kuzie of not being real right now. Kuzie gets frustrated: “Ty. We’re not talking about Dan right now. I’m talking about a theory about Renee. Don’t twist that into talking about why I shouldn’t nominate Dan.” Ty: “you’re getting defensive.” Kuzie: “yeah I am, because it’s not time to bring up Dan.” Dan walks in and offers to clean Kuzie’s bathroom [worst possible timing lol, they are both pissed]. Kuzie asks for some more time alone with Ty and he leaves. Ty apologizes for cutting Kuzie off. Kuzie says Renee isn’t connected to any guys. Ty: “what about Hope.” Kuzie: “it’s not romantic.” Ty insists that doesn’t matter. Kuzie insists Renee is “workable”. Ty: “okay Kuzie…” Kuzie says still has a day to think about it, but the Renee thing is probably not gonna happen. Ty: “alright Kuzie…” Kuzie: “but I have my own game to play so you can’t get angry—” Ty: “I’m not angry!” [he definitely is, trying to play cool] Ty says its a bulls—t move if the reasoning is to “not follow someone else”. Kuzie says if it’s a bulls—t move then that’s what it’s gonna be. Ty says he is getting frustrated because he is seeing certain things that don’t align with their team; he sees Kuzie on his team and this decision doesn’t add up, at least not right now. Ty says Shanaya is a girl that gets infatuated with someone and then acts a fool, but Claudia is clearly not like that [really?]. Kuzie says if she puts her trust in Shanaya, Kuzie will get burned in the end because Shanaya will choose Dan. Ty says Claudia thinks of Renee as disposable. More talk about Dan/Shanaya/Renee. Eventually Kuzie brings it back to her decision: “I can promise you, but I can’t promise your friends. So you might hate me…” Ty says Daniel/Anika are disposable but he would want to target Shanaya/Renee before them.
2:00:40 - Backyard - Father Talk
Zach and Hope discuss the relationship between parents and their children. Hope says he isn’t close with his father.
2:03:31 - Pink Bedroom - This Isn’t Over
Ty makes his bed. He whispers: “you’re not about to f—k up my game, believe that.” He goes searching for Kuzie. Daniel says she went to the DR.
2:05:12 - Pantry - Pantry Hug
Ty finds Claudia in the pantry. They hug. Claudia asks how his talk with Kuzie was. Ty: “we’ll see.” Renee enters and Ty leaves.
2:05:43 - Kitchen - Ty Plans to Plan
Ty tells Dan that they are going to have to figure something out, and that they will chat later.
2:06:46 - Purple Bedroom - Bedroom Stuff
Dan gets dressed in the bedroom.
2:07:02 - Backyard - Ty’s Brilliant Plan for Hope
Ty just told something to Zach/Hope about what Kuzie said. Zach: “I knew it. I knew it.” Ty says he has to talk to Hope later, so Zach leaves to let them talk now. Ty asks when Hope “wants to go home”. Hope says he wants to stick around as long as possible to be a shield for the group when it matters the most. Ty says he might need Hope to do something crazy this week: use the veto on Santina (leaving Hope himself on the block). Ty says he will tell him if he gets the numbers to keep him safe. Ty: “I’m not gonna make the decision until I know.” Hope agrees. Zach returns to the area.
2:09:29 - Backyard - Ty Warns Zach
Ty and Zach walk away. Ty tells Zach that Zach made things worse for himself by talking to Kuzie last night. Ty says Kuzie was distraught with the way Zach was talking to her. Zach is shocked that he came off as aggressive. Ty tells him that Kuzie is considering nominating Dan or Zach. Zach: “me?!” Ty: “I already told her ‘you’re not f—king putting up Zach’.” Ty says Kuzie isn’t even considering Renee. Ty says worst-case scenario is that Dan goes up. Ty: “I might need to get Hope to use the veto on Santina.” Zach, still in shock: “she’s that mad at me?” Ty advises him to apologize to Kuzie for being aggressive in a natural setting; he shouldn’t approach her or it will look obvious that Ty told him. Zach continues working out with Hope. He whispers: “f—k man, is that the end of my game…?” And that’s a wrap for Digital Daily #15!

So ever since I updated to torch 2 I get this start:
Installing requirements for Web UI
If submitting an issue on github, please provide the full startup log for debugging purposes.
Initializing Dreambooth
Dreambooth revision: 3324b6ab7fa661cf7d6b5ef186227dc5e8ad1878
Successfully installed google-auth-oauthlib-0.4.6 requests-2.28.2 transformers-4.26.1
Does your project take forever to startup?
Repetitive dependency installation may be the reason.
Automatic1111's base project sets strict requirements on outdated dependencies.
If an extension is using a newer version, the dependency is uninstalled and reinstalled twice every startup.
[+] xformers version 0.0.18.dev489 installed.
[+] torch version 2.0.0+cu118 installed.
[+] torchvision version 0.15.1+cu118 installed.
[+] accelerate version 0.17.1 installed.
[+] diffusers version 0.14.0 installed.
[+] transformers version 4.26.1 installed.
[+] bitsandbytes version 0.35.4 installed.
Launching Web UI with arguments: --xformers
D:\ai\stable-diffusion-webui\venv\lib\site-packages\pkg_resources\__init__.py:123: PkgResourcesDeprecationWarning: llow is an invalid version and will not be supported in a future release
warnings.warn(
D:\ai\stable-diffusion-webui\venv\lib\site-packages\torchvision\transforms\functional_tensor.py:5: UserWarning: The torchvision.transforms.functional_tensor module is deprecated in 0.15 and will be **removed in 0.17**. Please don't rely on it. You probably just need to use APIs in torchvision.transforms.functional or in torchvision.transforms.v2.functional.
warnings.warn(
Loading weights [e6415c4892] from D:\ai\stable-diffusion-webui\models\Stable-diffusion\realisticVisionV20_v20.safetensors
Creating model from config: D:\ai\stable-diffusion-webui\configs\v1-inference.yaml
LatentDiffusion: Running in eps-prediction mode
DiffusionWrapper has 859.52 M params.
Applying xformers cross attention optimization.
Textual inversion embeddings loaded(0):
Model loaded in 4.2s (load weights from disk: 0.5s, create model: 0.4s, apply weights to model: 0.6s, apply half(): 0.8s, move model to device: 0.7s, load textual inversion embeddings: 1.1s).
CUDA SETUP: Loading binary D:\ai\stable-diffusion-webui\venv\lib\site-packages\bitsandbytes\libbitsandbytes_cudaall.dll...
​
​
Soooo... What i Obviously tryed is to fix so that SD req versions and dreambooth req versions are the same.. I've done that but even so it takes forever to start as it says, it's probably uninstalling and reinstalling everything on boot but I don't know why because I've matched all the version in those files.
​
To the second part, the bold part of things being out of date, any clue what to do with that?
" llow is an invalid version and will not be supported in a future release"
Then the second part there with Torch vision, what's up with that?
Any takers? Everything is running ok.. It's just worrysome because I jsut did a fresh install of SD to get away from error messages and this came at me straight from the start..
​
Thanks very much for any inisght..

I think it's funny that we're all -myself included- having a big struggle where to put "Deism" in the grand spectrum of religious and philosophical affiliations, what identifying as a Deist implies concerning our idea or description of God and what makes it unique compared to others. I want to say a couple of things based on my reading in the last 4 years.
In some conversations I come across remarks like "this is the Christian idea of God, Deism does not propose such and such". I don't think any of us are an authority on what Deism "requires" but it's certainly easily conflated with cultural atheism in the name of distinguishing it from religiosity. Also naturalist pantheism being labeled as Deism seems commonplace just because it's anti-Biblical.
To summarize my personal understanding of it, Deism is nothing more or less than Philosophical Monotheism (stripped of divine mission or intervention):
The idea that the universe (nature, time, space, matter, energy, laws of physics and motion) has an absolute literal beginning before which there was nothing, there was no 'before', but there was the Creator only, and the Creator (the transcendent but personal and intelligent being that is above and beyond the confinements of the universe, the only self-existent/uncaused entity) is responsible for the emergence of the universe.
We're talking about the "emergence" of time and space itself, which is incomprehensible to our minds, but logically provable with the Uncaused Cause argument which states that the chain of causality can not go back forever in an infinite regress, and the arrow of time must have been fired at some point or else it would never have reached this very moment. (Another argument, called the ontological argument, states that the Highest Idea Conceivable can not possibly not exist as in that case we wouldn't have been able to conceive its idea in the first place.)
Many variants of opposition to this stance is a gigantic consensus of a plethora of theistic and atheistic religions that have dominated much of history really, which all believe in unoriginated, eternal, self-existent universe. This point is important. I included atheism in 'religions' to the surprise of some because from the deistic pov it is considered illogical hence superstitious.
From the widespread ancient creation myths of the earliest civilizations to modern atheism, to name a few, in the Babylonian Enuma Elish, Hindu Vedas, Aristotelian cosmology, Hebrew Bible (specifically the Book of Genesis), and the Qur'an (verse 11:7 etc.) (also the recent quantum theories alternative to the Big Bang); the uncontested idea was eternal cosmos.
The cosmos, the interwoven fabric of time and space, had existed since forever, going back to an eternal past without a beginning, ever been filled with chaotic primordial oceans that is the essence of matter (and of the age of agricultural settlements), and one day a Demiurge (Craftsman) with his pantheon who are all inhabitants here decide to bring shape, form, and order to this disordered watery realm. He uses this pre-existing matter, water, to sculpt a habitat called by the ancients "heaven and earth", a dome shaped planet with a stretched flat ground and hemispheric cover. Just like he will sculpt Adam from mud later. The reason the sky is blue is because there are waters above just like upon the earth, but confined behind a solid transparent platform held up by invisible columns. When the oceans were originally split in two, that's how the sky and the earth were distinguished. There are actual resting places of the sun and the moon in the far off edges of the world, and geographic locations in direct exposure to them. The stars are stations of heavenly beings. The highest layer of the sky above the clouds houses the Heavenly Court, the pantheon of divine royalty who established themselves there after the creation was done, reigning over the earth, managing natural affairs.
This is the Biblical and more or less all of the ancient cosmology (Mormons and earth flatters got it right). In short, although there is a mighty royal figure responsible for crafting the dome-planet earth and bringing order to anarchy, the "universe" (time and space) that encapsulates it have no mention of being originated out of nothing here. Contrary to popular belief, the Genesis never claimed or was interested in any creator or creation of nature, it merely gave a mythological account of how the observable world earned its current shape and state. It didn't say that the "heaven and earth" was the entire universe or spacetime spectrum itself; or that matter(waters), the raw material of the world, needed to be created by a higher power.
Rather, the Demiurge and his minions had been living in space for quite some time, spending their days not knowing what to do with all the watery chaos, until one day they begin a construction that takes 6 working days plus 1 resting day.
It's the Scholastic and Kalam philosophy that first proposed an absolute origin for nature/spacetime and attributed Supreme qualities to the non-anthropomorphic higher power responsible for it. Later, 17-18th century Enlightenment thinkers divorced this Creator from scriptural religion altogether. But rationalist philosophy that developed even among scriptural scholars had ever been contra-Biblical which is why they had been debating how to reconcile reason and revelation for centuries since Thomas Aquinas and before.
In short, Monotheism in this modern sense emerged with philosophy articulated among clerical circles and developed further by Enlightenment Deism by being stripped of mythological aspects.
It is important to have the right idea about what organized religion (Judaism, Christianity, Islam) really is to distinguish it from Deism. With their scriptural tenet of eternal cosmos, a pantheon of multiple divine figureheads or demi-gods called angels or triune persons, anthropomorphic/material chief deity, deified priest-kings called prophets; they are surviving remnants of "Monolatristic Henotheism" -a hardened, centralized, more coercive form of Polytheism- rather than Monotheism.
Sure, they are a unique brand that put much more emphasis on the head of the pantheon, and obsessively iconoclastic (except when their holy sites and symbols are concerned that is), but that's pretty much it. That is why it's called Monolatrism, and to our surprise, the Babylonian cult of Marduk was just as much Monolatristic that we might as well call it Monotheistic by the prevailing understanding of this term. (Marduk was named the Creator of the heaven and earth, and the King of the gods whose will is only subordinate to his.)
Modern urban religious societies do not realize how rationalized and modernized their outlook on God actually is, like an unlabeled de facto Deism, compared to scriptural orthodoxy they conveniently ignore. Today, the legit religious lifestyle is preserved by extreme traditionalists on the peripheries, not the usual Church going aunt, not even conservative politicians. Groups like Mormons and Muslim Salafis advocate for literalist interpretations of fundamental texts, cleansed of apologetic metaphors and obscurations, which reveal the texts' true cosmology and view of divine hierarchy.
Between soft paganism (scattered and tolerant) and hard paganism (centralized and coercive), the three big heavenly religions fall under the latter category, but their modern adherents are closer to Deism in their view and way of life than either.
That is not to say this anti-Monotheistic religiosity rooted way before the three big doesn't continue to poison our thoughts and behavior. Although ritual worship is allegedly only dedicated to a chief deity, we have lesser divine beings and holy spirits venerated with just as much piety, temples and shrines to make Communion with said divine powers, offerings to please them, priests to confess our sins to and intervene on our behalf, and countless other pagan superstition dedicated to the skies and royal Morgan Freeman up there. Muslims still pray towards a cube that houses a black meteorite (representing a moon deity) five times a day. Religious societies still vaguely 'divinize' charismatic politicians as chosen saviours for swearing by the holy book and promising unity and protection of their traditional values.
The believer's heart is not alone in a spiritual relationship with a singular Divine authority who is stripped of all human faults, alone in Its presence without involvement of self-appointed intermediaries, nor is his/her mind satisfied about belief since established theology isn't interested in reducing Divinity to oneness from all the additions and extensions and inventions justified under labels like 'only intercessors' or 'persons/faces of the one and the same essence'.
Rather the establishment is interested in apologizing for the inerrancy of its book, reconcilation of doctrinal inconsistencies, or indisputability of its leaders, like a one-party dictatorship ideology. You could say, it values paranormality over spirituality, religiosity over faith, if that makes sense. So the anti-logical mystery of triune godhead, divine offspring or genealogy, or finite mortals receiving literal historical words from an infinite and transcendent entity, or angels (malak=mighty one) being blatantly disguised remnants of Canaanite/Greek/Arab pantheon ... all pass as inconsistencies of Monotheism in need of explanation while they really have Polytheistic mentality and tradition going millenias back. "Divine Decree Manifest" on paper and in human language was invented by pagans and so was divinely ordained rulers. What did a Jewish Messiah do or believe different than Hammurabi exactly?
Opening the door to divine mission or intervention has always been about making a church, a spiritual demagogue, look infallible and indispensable, not about sincerely understanding or loving or exalting the Divine. My issue is, why should we refrain from having God in our lives and minds just because of those who exploit Its name?
When it comes to creating and designing nature, these religions have no concept of nature or inviolable natural laws to begin with. When it comes to Omnipotence, Jehovah or Father or Allah are anything but, as they need constant assistance and collaboration of Angels (Mighty Ones) (let's just call them Gods already) to be able to manage cosmic affairs. Each Angel/God is entrusted by The God (Allah in Arabic is literally Al-Ilah) with governance of a particular natural/cosmic function like weather, soil, fertility, death, guidance, judgment in afterlife etc. When it comes to Omnibenevolence, you don't need to be reminded that the scriptures have zero concern of proving their god's goodness with all the atrocious militaristic commandments and even sending humanity to earth as a punishment! Adam and Eve's banishment can be interpreted as Misotheistic (hatred of God and depiction of God as cruel) even --- he is not portrayed as loving or merciful in any way, but perhaps as a necessary evil or benevolent tyrant. As a Deist I would much rather considering being here as a blessing of the Creator rather than punishment by a satanic deity. Or what about being All-Just? Having my sins atoned for with the sacrifice of someone else instead of my remorse and change is not fair. Not to mention that an All-Powerful Being should not be able to be born or killed. Worship of mortals flesh and blood is not worship of God.
But all these attributes - Creation, Omnipotence, Omnibenevolence etc. - are so culturally wed to the rhetoric of organized religion, it's as if one has to defend every dogma and tenet of these religions the moment they take a step into the realm of Monotheism. (And quickly it turns into a cultural dog fight between theists and atheists, false dichotomies between creationism and evolutionism and other things. Someone want to tell atheists they still have the same cosmology -a universe without a beginning- as Sumerians and Mormons, and that the biological evolutionary laws indicate intelligent design with no reference to Christianity, or that the Watchmaker they're trying to discredit is not even found in the scriptures?) This among others if you ask me is the greatest burden and confusion caused by organized religion and part of the reason Deists struggle to define themselves or pinpoint their position in relation to others.
Organized religions do not only spread so many lies and paradoxes, but blend the truth with superstition and cause the truth to be discredited among their nonsenses like a jewel lost in a bag of coal.
TL;DR, from my pov, Deism is simply belief -whether it be a rational conclusion or heartfelt knowledge- in One Supreme God, Starter of the universe (and its independent order), Moral Authority, while denying the existence of other divine entities or supernatural forces of any kind as well as divine intervention - miracles, revelations, vicegerents/spokespersons. This does not mean God has to be impersonal, disinterested, spiritually insignificant, morally indifferent, and most certainly not that It is nature or a part of nature (Creator =/= creation).
Superstition consists of rejecting reason, mystifying creatures, mythologizing natural phenomena, deifying human beings and human-like images.
Let's be confident in saying that the flaw of religious institutions has never been proposing a Supreme Creator, but on the contrary, 1. undermining It, and 2. speaking from Its mouth to deify themselves, their own ideas.

Context: I’m a 20(F) and I was working with my bf 18(M) we had previous experience working at food-related services so our job was dishwashing and general cleaning.
The first 2 months were fine, we were learning the ropes of the location, where to get more cleaning supplies, where to get mops and brooms, and where to throw out the trash. The work wasn’t inherently hard but it was stressful especially when we had rushed and we worked from 4 pm-12 am The Dishroom also had ventilation issues and was dusty so we would sometimes come home itchy.
It was alright for the most part until I got a tailbone injury but still needed to work to pay for rent.
Around the 2-month mark, I started noticing small things, coworkers going missing for large chunks of time, first 30 minutes, then an hour, then an hour and thirty.
Normally I wouldn’t care as long as it doesn’t affect me or actively make my job harder, but over time it did, I would find that I and my bf would be the only one in the Dishroom and we would be struggling to get the dishes that the cooks and chefs needed, it didn’t help that the manager would come in ask where everyone else was and I didn’t have an answer so he’d get mad.
Coupled with the tailbone pain and feeling overwhelmed I started to get more irritated by my co-workers, it felt like they could just go off where ever and I was supposed to deal with whatever mess they left behind.
This went on for about 5 more months until I decided to leave, having to deal with constant rushes with no support from people who were supposed to be helping us got really irritating, they wouldn’t communicate what they were doing, and the only options were on lunch, cleaning, in the bathroom or on a smoke break.
Lunch lasts for 30 minutes and a break lasts for 15 and we only get one of those every 5 hours.
But when they did show up they would either have no dishes or a cart (we would put dishes on carts then bring them to the dish room, then once they were washed they would be carted off to dry storage and stored away.) after an hour. Keep in mind during all of this me and my bf are doing dishes non-stop.
I even asked where one of them was to the manager but he didn’t know either. And I would look for them when I had the chance and they weren’t in any of the usual spots.
So I just it more frustrated especially when they would pop in the Dishroom and there was stuff that needed to be done but they would just walk back out. Today was my last day since I can’t deal with this anymore I and my bf were talking to a new co-worker about where our coworker was and I explained to them that they often disappear and how today was our last day and then my lazy coworker walks in and hears, then he is mad the rest of the day at me for telling them that, he even complained about me to some of the cooks (WHILE WE WERE CLEANING OUT THE MACHINE TAKING OUT THE TRASH AND CLEANING THE ROOM)
Anyways I’m going to door dash from now on, I don’t want to come home with aching back pain every day just so I can be taken advantage of by a lazy coworkes. just hope he can deal with the workload now that we're gone.
Edit, Minor spelling mistakes are fixed, also my only regret now IG is that I'm not putting in 2 weeks but then again the only person to remotely care about the job was one of my co-workers who were the less prominent hider.

Super Long Post! But this is a rather huge update that includes GitRepos.
I cover a lot of this stuff in my video found here - https://youtu.be/IxMLU15dUGw (It's like an hour long and goes over a lot of the stuff said here, before they even released this info. They even use some of the same stuff as evidence.)
Discord Link to info - To see the update in it's origional format. https://discord.com/channels/988365908009447485/988662112454836234/1090510064609140867
Full list of assets purchased to make Dark & Darker: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/16DjiRitUa_R3IkelPNKW0Q8F-H1KFuWXTxxw2q0SCQo/edit#gid=0
Git logs for the first year of development. The earliest entries start at the bottom of the document. It is a little embarrassing showing all our development mistakes and bugs but we believe that is further proof that Dark and Darker was built from the ground up. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qyRk3zyIMuwTOvL3E8zchxw9hiukpKWC/view?usp=sharing
- Although our company was officially founded in October 2021, our development logs go back to September 2021. This can be explained by our company history below.
​
- A bit of background history regarding IRONMACE. Several of our founding members started work as a development team starting in September 2021. The members worked for more than a month in a shabby jiujitsu gym without pay using our own personal PCs as a test of our resolve and teamwork, and also because we had no investors. Once we realized that our members could form the foundations of a viable company, the company was formally founded in late October 2021. The original funds were quickly exhausted and IRONMACE almost went bankrupt as we were unable to acquire investors. Luckily members rallied together and collected funds from over twenty friends and families to bankroll the company for another couple months. This was also quickly exhausted and IRONMACE relied on outsourcing work unrelated to game development to help it survive another month. It was only through grueling meetings and countless, countless, countless rejections that IRONMACE was finally able to find brave VCs willing to fund the studio in 2022. The studio made it point to accept as little money as possible to stay hungry and motivated to get to the current point.
​
1. Our Korean Response to the takedown claim - From Iron Mace
We are Iron Mace, a game developer in Korea developing the PC game Dark & Darker. Through this document, we will deal with the Digital Millennium Copyright Act Take Down Notice (DMCA Take Down Notice) filed against us by Nexon Korea Co., Ltd. (hereinafter referred to as “Nexon”), and our position on allegations of copyright infringement and leakage of trade secrets.
Through its own investigation, Nexon said, "Dark and Darker appears to have been developed by copying and stealing trade secrets and copyrighted information owned by Nexon." said. We want to make it clear that this claim is baseless. Our company, Iron Mace, has never owned or used Nexon's copyrighted materials or trade secrets.
Nexon belatedly registered the copyright related to the P3 project in February 2023, more than six months after Dark and Darker was released, and is claiming copyright infringement against it. The first point of their claim is that one of our members (then director, hereinafter A) illegally moved important assets to a private server “without permission”.
Our response to the above claim is as follows.
Due to the mandatory remote work policy implemented by Nexon in response to the COVID-19 pandemic, A received written approval from Nexon executives to use an external personal server to improve the team's work efficiency from 2020 to 2021. While developing using a personal server for about a year, A asked if it was okay to continue using the personal server. The head of the senior organization responded to the question by telling them to refrain from using private servers. A has agreed to discontinue use of the private server. Instead, we received an exception from the company to work in the office, circumventing the current remote work policy, in order to keep the team working efficiently.
In order to stop using the personal server, A moved the connected system and started deleting trade secret files, but the immediate hurdles (a kind of mid-term evaluation process in the game industry, and if the results are not good, the project may be suspended) , the migration of development systems to internal servers was not a quick and thorough process. As a result, some auto-upload scripts related to the build system were left running. And buildings around the office are closed due to corona expansion, so I can no longer go to work, etc. A made a mistake of using the personal server again without re-approval due to the anxiety of reduced work efficiency and the burden of meeting the schedule and achieving the goal.
At that time, all computers in Nexon's company were monitored using the endpoint solution, so the use of personal servers subject to approval and re-approval was known to Nexon during several months of development. However, during that period, A did not receive a single warning from the security team, and when answering to the head of the higher organization to refrain from using the server, he received an answer saying, 'It's a bit ambiguous to say that it's official/no', so he made a wrong decision. that was hit
A suffered the shock of his previous project being shut down in 2020, and several other projects within Nexon were canceled around the same time. A had doubts about the release along with various circumstances that could only be seen as lack of development support. Later, due to an incident, his trust with his boss was broken, and in June 2021, he finally decided to leave Nexon.
A revealed to members of the development team he had worked with for a long time that he would be leaving the company soon. He cited a lack of support for development as the reason for his departure, and further doubts about whether he would ever be able to launch the project. He also said he welcomes those who would like to join us for the next try. He's likely pushing for a project in a similar genre to the P3 project, but he's made it clear that everything needs to be developed from scratch. The above fact was also proven in the course of investigating a separate individual lawsuit filed by Nexon against A in the testimony collected by the police.
Immediately after Nexon's executives learned of A's plan to resign, their attitude suddenly changed to find A's fault, without any effort to amicably resolve the situation. He then sent an internal audit team to accuse him of stealing files, even though he knew the private server had been used for work for months. Seeing efforts to find out the fault somehow in this way rather than solving it through dialogue, the relationship of trust with the company was completely broken, and A consulted with a lawyer and said that since there are personal information on the personal server, there is no obligation to submit it to the company. After hearing the conclusion, instead of submitting my private server, I completely deleted everything in it.
A was fired due to a claim interpreted differently from his intention, and around August 2021, civil/criminal charges and lawsuits were filed against his house and other assets with omnidirectional seizure and pressure, and several seizures and searches were conducted. has been done up to A's personal case is still ongoing, and claims that he stole or misappropriated these files have yet to be substantiated. He actively cooperated with police investigations every time. Our company was also seized and searched several times during this investigation, but we responded to the investigation with the utmost cooperation in order to prove our innocence. If Nexon's trade secrets were really stolen or misappropriated, nine out of the more than 20 P3 project team members would not have risked joining Iron Mace.
The second issue in the DMCA notice filed by Nexon is the claim that Iron Mace CEO Terence Park abused the suspect's stolen trade secrets and copyrighted material to develop Dark & Darker for his own and Iron Mace's benefit. Our response to this claim is below.
The company's CEO makes it clear that no stolen trade secrets or copyrighted material were used to develop Dark & Darker. Indeed, Terrence Park has repeatedly stressed to his team that in order to maintain the company's vision and branding, third-party trade secrets must not exist by mistake and must be developed from scratch.
Subsequently, in the DMCA notice, Nexon claims that the only way to come up with an idea similar to the P3 project is theft, and as a basis, it claims that the P3 project has never been disclosed to a third party during this period. However, this claim can be proven unequivocally false. Nexon unveiled the P3 in a media showcase in August 2021, and has since written about it in numerous blogs and articles:
https://www.gematsu.com/2021/08/nexon-showcases-12-new-games-project-magnum-project-hp-mabinogi-mobile-more
https://pdf.irpocket.com/C3659/GbYe/dYzj/ICN2.pdf
https://www.donga.com/news/It/article/all/20210805/108384593/1
Nexon also claims in its DMCA notice that no other game has the same "concept, genre, and plot" as P3, claiming to have created an entirely new concept. But none of the P3 concepts are entirely new. A game already on the market called Expedition Agartha is a similar game in the three categories already stated.
Since then, Iron Mace has claimed without evidence that it is impossible to make a test version of Dark & Darker in just 10 months of founding without using Nexon's trade secrets. Our response to this claim is as follows.
The fact that a big game company like Nexon can't develop games this fast doesn't mean that other studios, big and small, can't develop at that speed.
Iron Mace's rapid pace of development was possible for the following reasons.
Iron Mace began development with 18 people, significantly more than the initial P3 team of about 11 people. The percentage of dual programmers doubled to 3 and 6, respectively.
We used as many 3D game objects as possible, purchased from the Asset Store, which account for most of the cost and time required for game development.
Also, with the permission of the artists, it was developed with a focus on game design and programming.
The server code did not exist because there were no server programmers on the P3 project team. However, Iron Mace was developed by employing senior-level server programmers from the beginning to create a stable server architecture.
Fortunately, we have evidence that clearly shows how we developed the game quickly and efficiently, and we will be making it public soon.
We'll soon publish a list of purchased assets used in Dark & Darker development, proving that almost all 3D assets were purchased from the Unreal Marketplace.
And we have tons of videos to see what major milestone builds look like, from early internal playtests to more recent tests. These videos will also be coming online soon, showing you how to quickly and efficiently develop the game from scratch.
Finally, for verification from a technical point of view, we will soon release the Git log and its file list, which is the development history from the first log in the Git repository to the work on the self-developed anti-cheat module. This is a log over a period of about a year or so. This will allow other developers to easily check our progress and check for stolen code or assets. In addition, since the P3 project was written while learning because none of the programmers had any experience using Unreal Engine at the time of the project, using the code and assets of the P3 project as a reference is a dark and darker project.
It wouldn't have helped you in your progress.
In the DMCA notice, Nexon compared and analyzed files from the Dark & Darker and P3 Projects and said, "The number of files with the same name is too many to be a coincidence." claims. And it claims to have found more than 2,338 files with the same name. Our response to this claim is as follows.
They attached the remaining 1,032 resources to Exhibit D, excluding files generated by using the same game engine. Of these, 950 files were either assets purchased from Unreal's Marketplace or files from plugins. The remaining 82 files (41 to be exact, because two files are created with the same file name) also have the same name because of the general concept and official naming convention recommended in the process of developing a typical first-person fantasy game. (See naming conventions and examples below)
Rules for Writing Unreal Engine Official Names
https://docs.unrealengine.com/5.0/en/recommended-asset-naming-conventions-in-unreal-engine-projects/
example)
Blueprint (BP_) + Arrow => BP_Arrow (Exhibit D 33p)
Material (M_) + Base (Base) => M_Base (Exhibit D 35p)
If Nexon agrees to provide the file, it is suggested to compare and analyze the actual contents of the files with the same name through a third party. We have provided a list of sources for all “same-named” resources listed by Nexon.
In addition, the DMCA notice claims that the two games' character designs, worldviews, and core gameplay are similar. In response to the above claim, we'd like to say that both games borrow settings from very traditional fantasy worlds. None of this is original, and the similarities to the pointed character classes and use of torches can be found in countless other fantasy games. Both games belong to the classic fantasy dungeon exploration genre, and the similarities can be explained.
In addition, Nexon claims that "Iron Mace purchased graphic assets, including character concept art, from the Unreal Marketplace, but the assets purchased from the Unreal Marketplace and Dark & Darker's assets look different, and there are many similarities with those of P3. ” claims. Our position on the claim is as follows.
Most of the 3D assets were purchased from the Unreal Marketplace, but most of the 2D graphic elements, including concept art and UI, were created in-house. The character concept artwork that Nexon claims similarities to is a reflection of a very traditional fantasy setting. In addition, the concept artwork of the two games was created by the same person, so the painting style is also similar. Soon, our concept artist will organize and disclose that the character concept of Dark & Darker does not infringe on the concept of P3. Through this document, Google image search shows artwork of other popular fantasy concepts, and Dark & Darker's concept art follows the general fantasy world, so it looks similar, but I want to prove that I did not infringe P3's copyright. .
The DMCA notice states that the two games' core concepts, genres, and storylines are so similar that "I am convinced that Iron Mace may have used Nexon's trade secrets to create Dark & Darker." Again, Dark & Darker's concept and settings are all largely inspired by traditional and popular fantasy RPG games. The gameplay of adventurers digging through dungeons full of monsters and treasure in search of riches is so common and common that it could be widely applied in many other fantasy games as well.
Just for fun, we asked ChatGPT to explain the definition of a typical PVP dungeon exploration game, and we got the following response.
----------------------------------Content from ChatGPT------------- ----------------------
In this PvP dungeon crawl game, players compete against each other in dangerous and mysterious dungeons filled with traps, puzzles, and monsters.
Players choose their character from several classes, each with unique abilities and playstyles. They need to explore dungeons, defeat monsters, and solve puzzles to advance deeper.
But besides fighting monsters, players also have to face each other in intense PvP battles. They can attack other players to steal loot or gain an advantage, but you have to be careful not to be suddenly attacked by enemy players.
In the meantime, players can collect loot, weapons, and magic items to help them in their missions. They can also trade items with other players or buy and sell them at NPC shops.
Gameplay requires strategic decision-making, and players must decide whether to focus on attacking other players or progressing through the dungeon. They must manage their limited resources carefully, including weapons, spells, and stamina.
The ultimate goal of the game is to reach the deepest dungeon's floor and defeat the final boss. You should be able to beat other players while doing all of this. The game offers an exciting and competitive experience for players who enjoy both PvE and PvP gameplay.
-------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------
Finally, the common characteristics of the two games announced in Exhibit E are generally shared characteristics that can also be found in many other similar games.
Judging from the information presented, it would be difficult for Nexon itself to believe that Iron Mace infringed on the copyright of the P3 project. And Nexon does not provide evidence that Iron Mace used Nexon's trade secrets to make Dark & Darker, only circumstantial inferences.
Finally, Nexon is accusing Iron Mace of violating Valve's SSA and SOCR, preventing us from delivering our games to fans on the world's largest PC gaming platform. We want Nexon to stop making baseless claims.
In order to resolve issues quickly and definitively, we are willing to provide source code, produced assets, and design documentation for comparison between the two companies. We ask Nexon to make a positive impact on gamers and gaming communities around the world by actively working on resolving issues between the two companies.
That's all of that document. Translated by google.
----------------------------------------------------
2. Concept Artist response:
Rebuttal to claims of character design similarity
Hello, this is Dark & Darker's concept artist.
Through this document, we would like to refute the allegation that the concept of P3 was stolen from Dark & Darker.
Nexon claims that Dark & Darker was developed using P3's assets, and claims to be suspicious because of their visual similarity. The contents below are intended to refute this and explain what parts we focused on in class design and why the claim that the results are similar is not valid.
Dark & Darker's classes are made up of classes commonly handled in Dungeons and Dragons and medieval fantasy games influenced by it, and aim for familiar classic fantasy concepts.
Therefore, it cannot be seen that it has the distinctive features of Dark & Darker in appearance or design.
Dark & Darker worked on the class concept based on the following three concerns.
What are the most familiar classes in the memories of classic fantasy fans?
What design can you accept without hesitation even if you are not a fan of classic fantasy?
What is the range that can be expressed with the assets you own (purchased assets)?
P3 and Dark & Darker have the same concept artist (i.e., because I worked on both), the way the characters are portrayed or the painting style may feel similar, but there are significant differences in detailed composition such as costumes.
The following will refute the claim that the classes of P3 and Dark & Darker are similar by comparing each class.
​
Class Comparison 1: Barbarian
When I started thinking about Dark & Darker's Barbarian, I initially tried to work with a barbaric warrior feel like Conan the Barbarian (movie). However, I had to use the purchased armor assets in common, so I had no choice but to switch to the current Nordic Viking feel.
To elaborate more, even if I drew concept art, I did not have enough time to create assets for it, so I changed the direction of the concept art according to the assets.
Images in document.
​
Figure 1: A draft of a Dark and Darker Barbarian that was scrapped in the works.
Images in document.
​
Figure 2: Barbarian used for loading image after drafting
Images in document.
Figure 3 below is various concept art of the barbarian that I referenced during work in this regard. Based on this, we focused on creating a barbarian that fits the worldview of Dark & Darker, and designing it so that there is no particular problem when using equipment of other classes in common.
​
Figure 3: Concept designs by other artists
Image in document.
​
Nexon is claiming that P3's Barbarian and Dark & Darker's Barbarian are similar.
As explained earlier, Dark & Darker's Barbarian was created based on works from common fantasy worlds, and furthermore, those used in various games.
​
​
Figure 4: P3 and the Barbarian in Dark & Darker
Image in document.
​
Even in the details, of course, there are differences. P3's barbarian is more colorful than Dark & Darker's barbarian, such as horns, Nordic patterns of armor, beard shape, and cape, and the style is mixed. The shape of the helmet may look similar by adopting the design of the actual German helmet (Yelmo de Gjermundbu), but the detailed design is completely different.
​
Class Comparison 2: Fighter
Image in document.
Dark & Darker's fighter is a class specialized in melee attacks wearing typical medieval knight armor. The items in Figure 5 below are reference materials when designing fighters, and are also popularly used, heavy armored warriors specializing in melee attacks.
Through the items in Figure 6, you can see what process the current fighter design came out through
​
Figure 5: Concept designs by other artists
Image in document.
​
Figure 6: Fighter used for loading image after drafting
Image in document.
​
Figure 7: P3's Tanker and Dark & Darker's Fighter
Image in document.
​
Nexon claims that P3's 'Tanker' and Dark & Darker's 'Fighter' were produced in a similar form. However, as you can see from the picture in Figure 7, except for the open helmet, everything is different, including the appearance, armor design, weapon design, bag, and props.
The figure wearing an open helmet is just a type of expression commonly used to show a character's face because it is obscured.
Class Comparison 3: Ranger
In games and movies set in the Middle Ages, rangers were often depicted wearing hoods, and purchased assets also included hoods. The costumes depicted in the Dark & Darker illustration were designed with reference to the asset costumes you own.
​
Figure 8: Appearance by referring to the clothing on the left and the hood on the right
Image in document.
​
Figure 9: Ranger used for loading image after cyan
Image in document.
​
Figure 10: Concept designs by other artists
Image in document.
​
Figure 11: P3 and Dark & Darker's Ranger
Image in document.
​
Dark & Darker's Ranger has borrowed the overall color from common designs to keep the sensibility of the old fantasy intact. Also, in order to express the concept of a hunter who fights while hiding in the dark, the use of colors was limited and designed with low saturation.
As you can see by comparing the P3 and Dark & Darker's Ranger illustrations, they are not the same except that they wear hoods and have bows.
​
Class Comparison 4: Wizard
The design that became the basis of the Dark and Darker Wizard is Gandalf from ‘The Lord of the Rings’, and it is the most easily recognizable image of a wizard.
​
Figure 12: Concept designs by other artists
Image in document.
​
Figure 13: Wizard of Dark and Darker with P3
Image in document.
​
Like the image of the other classes described earlier, Dark & Darker's Wizard expressed a more traditional and classic wizard than P3's Wizard. Wearing a long and cumbersome robe for an adventurer's appearance, it was produced with the intention of taking the form of an old man who is old but wise and still capable of fighting.
Class Comparison 5: Log
Likewise, in the case of logs, other than wearing a hood, the P3 and Dark & Darker logs have different components such as weapons and costumes.
In the case of the rogue, we tried to embody the real thief's play, rather than simply wielding a fast weapon such as a dagger (it is actually possible to steal while playing), and for this purpose, the weapon was highlighted at the beginning, and finally It is made in the form of emphasizing the money bag held in the hand.
Rather, in the case of Rogue, the design was made to approach the essence of a thief more than a thief generally seen.
​
Figure 14: Initial log cyan
Image in document.
​
Figure 15: Concept designs by other artists
Image in document.
​
Figure 16: P3's Thief and Dark & Darker's Rogue
Image in document.
Like the images of other classes described above, P3’s ‘thief’ and Dark & Darker’s ‘rogue’ have different design goals.
Class Comparison 6: Cleric
In general, the class called Cleric is often designed with the Templar Knights as a motif. Dark and darker clerics also adopted a design with a tunic wrapped around chainmail to match this popular design. Also, like other classes, it had to be created based on the assets you have, so I designed it with reference to the assets below.
​
Figure 17: Polyphoria's assets referencing clothing design
Image in document.
​
​
Figure 18: Concept designs by other artists
Image in document.
​
Figure 19: P3 and Dark & Darker's Cleric
Image in document.
​
From that point of view, if you compare P3 and Dark & Darker's clerics, you can see that there are many differences in armor, costumes, and patterns.
​
Conclusion: P3 and Dark & Darker are different.
​
In this way, the design of the classes expressed in Dark & Darker is only the result of selecting the ones that are most suitable for Dark & Darker among one of the character designs that have appeared in various fantasy games that have been dealt with for decades, and are not designed by stealing P3's trade secrets. didn't
In conclusion, the allegation of theft is only a phenomenon that arises from the fact that the concepts of the two projects are oriented toward a medieval fantasy worldview. We, the development team of Iron Mace, focused on the direction of the game we were aiming for, designed and expressed it accordingly, and revealed that the game was not made by taking the parts that were produced in P3 as it is.

My name is Kyle and I first was exposed to pornography when I was only 9 years old at the time I was under the impression “that all men did it” and “it's masculine to have sex” so “it must be fine” I continued to watch for 3 more years before I started to really have a issue with it the real bad issue started when I was 13 by that time I was using pornography 3 times a day and was having a struggle to get free though I tried all the methods and knew it was a sin I couldn't quit doing it but I stuffed it through and got clean for about a year and when I was 15 I relapsed and the addiction came back worse than ever before I started to tell lies about weather or not I was watching porn and felt the guilt after I was done watching it fast forward to 2022 I was 20 years old and started to make a change in my life and moved to seek a better life and a better job that what I had before I have now done all things and feel blessed for the things that I've achieved through Christ but despite trying to get free from the spirit of porn I can't become free what has helped everybody else in this group get and stay free from porn?

29.03.23: Strength Endurance
5 ROUNDS. NO REST BETWEEN EXERCISE. 120s BETWEEN ROUNDS.
Total Training Time: 52:43
Double KB Complex ⬇️ +2x24kg Kettlebells
10 Double KB Skier Swings
10 Double KB Cleans
10 Double KB Jerks
10 Double KB OH/Rack Split Squats
X5 - 200 total reps
Finisher: ⬇️ +32/28kg Kettlebells
3 Offset Clean & Strict Press
X8 EMOM - 24 total reps
2 Pump Burpees - Bodyweight
100 Burpees, 200 Pushups
Parallel Bar Dips +32kg Kettlebell-PR Volume🥳
28 total reps
Jump Rope - 1 pound rope - High Intensity
6:10 minutes total
Verses for today:
For the kingdom of heaven is like unto a man that is an householder, which went out early in the morning to hire labourers into his vineyard. And when he had agreed with the labourers for a penny a day, he sent them into his vineyard. And he went out about the third hour, and saw others standing idle in the marketplace, and said unto them; Go ye also into the vineyard, and whatsoever is right I will give you. And they went their way. Again he went out about the sixth and ninth hour, and did likewise. And about the eleventh hour he went out, and found others standing idle, and saith unto them, Why stand ye here all the day idle? They say unto him, Because no man hath hired us. He saith unto them, Go ye also into the vineyard; and whatsoever is right, that shall ye receive. So when even was come, the Lord of the vineyard saith unto his steward, Call the labourers, and give them their hire, beginning from the last unto the first. And when they came that were hired about the eleventh hour, they received every man a penny. But when the first came, they supposed that they should have received more; and they likewise received every man a penny. And when they had received it, they murmured against the goodman of the house, saying, These last have wrought but one hour, and thou hast made them equal unto us, which have borne the burden and heat of the day. But he answered one of them, and said, Friend, I do thee no wrong: didst not thou agree with me for a penny? Take that thine is, and go thy way: I will give unto this last, even as unto thee. Is it not lawful for me to do what I will with mine own? Is thine eye evil, because I am good? So the last shall be first, and the first last: for many be called, but few chosen. And Jesus going up to Jerusalem took the twelve disciples apart in the way, and said unto them, Behold, we go up to Jerusalem; and the Son of man shall be betrayed unto the chief priests and unto the scribes, and they shall condemn him to death, and shall deliver him to the Gentiles to mock, and to scourge, and to crucify him: and the third day he shall rise again.
Matthew 20:1‭-‬19 KJV
The Lord's Prayer
Our Father, who art in heaven. Hallowed be thy name. Thy Kingdom come, Thy Will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven. Give us this day, our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses. As we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us, not into temptation. But deliver us from evil. For Thine is the Kingdom, the Power and the Glory. Forever and ever. In Jesus Christ's Holy name I pray.
Amen.
Father, help me put on the Full Armor of God & protect me & my family from the wiles of the evil one.
Halleluyah!

No more posts after this. More of a reminder to myself than anything.
I just can't believe things ended up this way. They did all of this, and when I'm dead they'll still be blaming my corpse. It's to be expected, we blame men for everything, even for the male suicide rate. How we treat men is never the issue. Men need some solid martyrs for the problems men face. Not stupid little shits like Elliot Rodgers.
I really don't want to die, but I'm prepared to go down defending myself from this oppression. I feel like I'm going to die... I don't feel safe. Just can't shake the feeling. My birthday is in a couple weeks. Will I get to see it? What does it even matter if everyone who knows is already gone and there's no one to celebrate with?
I hate seeing happy people. So blissfully unaware of all the evil in the world, the evil right under their noses. They get to go to their home, their families, their kids... Work on their career, their projects, their hobbies... And all of that has been stolen from me.
I especially hate seeing happy attractive women. Handed everything in life on a silver platter. People bending over backward to make them happy. Never facing the consequences of what they do.
I don't think most women even know what love is. Treated like princesses their entire life, taught that men are disposable pawns. Why would you expect them to know what love really feels like. It's not surprising they're never satisfied. But hey, why take responsibility when you can blame the rise of single moms on men as well. I'm sure it's just anecdotal that every absent father I've met wishes he was allowed to see his kids. And almost every single mom I know left the father of her kids for superficial reasons. That's probably why women are 'abused' so much. Easy to play victim instead of whore.
The most proactive feminist I've ever met. Lives off of alimony from her husband she divorced almost 10 years ago.
Speaking of never facing consequences it reminds me... They buried that Study UoM did on federal sentencing gender disparities. Those that spout racial justice. Let me remind you that the disparity for a black man in prison is 6x greater for being a man than for being black. Women are let off much more often and face almost half the sentence a man does for the exact. same. crime.
Fuck this world and all the shit people in it. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. I'm ready to stop suffering for womens sins.

Guys! its long but please read my story! to start off I was about 9.5 weeks pregnant, and after many weeks of back and forth i decided to go forth with an abortion. For background on myself i am a diagnosed hypochondriac and to say i have health anxiety is a complete understatement. (i literally went to the ER 35 times in one year) I cant even properly explain to you the amount of panic, fear, crying, and sleepless nights i had up to this.... and it was all for nothing!!!! the day of my appt I went with the intention of having a surgical abortion, I got to the appt, got right up on the table and right before she was about to administer sedation i backed out. Thats how bad my anxiety is, I couldn't even bear the thought of sedation. I opted for medical that day at the appointment. I was panicking even getting my rh shot, googling side effects and losing my ever loving mind. I took the first pill. That day i came home and rested. I noticed i was mildly lightheaded. I spent the ENTIRE night on this thread, other threads, reading absolute horror stories. I was in sheer panic. more than terrified. eventually I Went to bed, (well tried anyways I didnt really sleep). I woke up with the intention of taking the second set of pills at 145 pm. But you guessed it, I couldn't do it. I was so intensely scared it stopped me from taking them for hours. Around 545 pm, I wiped and there was blood. a moderate ammount, i panicked because I hadnt even taken the second set of pills yet, why was i bleeding? Called my clinic and they said its not common, but my body had started the process after recognizing the first pill stopped the growth, and to continue on with the second pills to be safe. I proceeded to cry and panic, and then Eventually I forced myself at 645 pm. (the sheer anxiety was so bad as i remembered all the stories i read) While these dissolved i walked outside on my property as that eases my anxiety. I pictured myself in agony , puking, begging for help etc. the absolute worst. I was also nervous because i was a bit further along and thought that meant more pain, more blood. more of everything bad. Not even before the 30 mins were up, The cramps started. Id say about 710 pm. at 715 i swallowed the pills, i did notice they didnt fully disolve however i believe thats okay? took two tylenol and an advil right then and there. they were in my lower back mostly at first. the bleeding started right away as well but was fairly light-moderate at this point. I came inside and braced myself, i will say they intensified quick. i found that pacing and walking eased my pain rather than standing or sitting still. I would say the cramps got to about a 6.5/10 at their peak. this lasted about an hour.(nothing i couldnt handle, it didnt even bring me to tears) i breathed, and held a heating pad on my lower abdomen. this helped. I found the cramps to be similar to when you have a poo cramp thats very bad. i didnt find it came in waves,it was more constant for me. eventually i had an urge to push like i had to poo on the toilet , however nothing came out. the bleeding was still nothing heavy yet. (sitting on the toilet helped the pain a great deal as well) while i was here i noticed my body started to shake similar to when you have a panic attack this literally only lasted about three minutes. I will add i was SO scared of the nausea and i quite literally experienced none. I also didnt eat prior to this from my nerves and had tylenol and advil in my system. I stood back up, went into my room and felt a rush accompanied by a dull ache in my actual vagina near the opening, ran to the toilet and passed two large clots with a great deal of blood. when i tell you i had INSTANT relief im not kidding. the pain literally disappeared. vanished. The bleeding did intesify at this point and is much heavier than a period. after this i was hungry, layed down , ate some soup drank some gatorade and watched a movie with literally zero pain. I will say that every 15-20 mins i did feel a gush and would pass clots. this lasted about two hours maybe if that. its 1250 am now, i have had one cramp about every 30 mins sometimes accompanied by rushes of blood but its not even noticeable really.3/10. my bleeding has already started to lessen and is equivalent to a regular period. ive changed my pad about three times in six hours. and some of thise i didnt even "need" to. one syomtom i didnt expect is i am having a decent ammount of gas. i can feel it rumbling in my belly but isnt painful. i am belching a lot though. I took one tylenol about an hour ago just incase but i could have done without it! The cramps im experiencing are similar to your period, and come in waves but last about two seconds. I come to you eating chips and dip on my couch extremly relieved and happy. I cant even believe that was IT. IF YOU ARE SCARED TRUST ME I UNDERSTAND! i have literally never been more scared to do something in my life and almost backed out not caring of the consequences. i panicked for 24 hours straight. i really sid not think i could dogiven my health anxiey and what i expected the oain to be like. insoent HOURS googling aall the ways i could die. I literally anticipated an exorcism. Not even close!! heres my advvice and takeaways, 1. be with someone you trust. I did this with my grandma who has been my biggest supporter my whole life and her calmness helped me. 2. HEAT PAD OR HOT WATER BOTTLE!! this helped so much! 3. if you dont want to lay down and cant sit still, don't. I know everyone says rest but walking actually eased my pain immensely!! 4. sitting on the toilet helps. I don't know why. 5. Control your breathing, dont let yourself get heightened as that actually sends more signals to your brain that something is wrong and can increase pain. 6. I aslo talked to my aunt and friend on the phone during the worst of the cramps, this distracted me. Alrhough there were points where I wasnt able to talk, feeling like someone was there helped. 7. dont anticipate the worst. I know its scary. I know all the awful stories are terrifying, but take me as an example... A walking stress ball of health anxiety... with a low pain tomerance and im FINE. completely unscathed with zero complications (so far) and literally zero pain six hours in. YOU CAN DO THIS!!! 8. If you feel like taking the pain meds you are prescribed (i was prescribed t 3's would help you- take them. I only didnt because again my anxiety is heightened when i feel high or sedated etc, if that doesnt bother you take them!!! 9. rotate tylenol and advil. 10. lastly, go with the motions. it will be okay. its temporary. This will be a memory one day. No pain lasts forever. You got this!!!!

I'm a North Korean defector who escaped back in 2009. My mother couldn't afford a C-section so she tried to cut my body out herself but couldn't handle the pain so only part of my head stuck out of her side for the first 3 years of my life. I never got an ounce of food until I was 12 years old. I was told Kim Jong II could read our thoughts at all times so we had to make sure our thoughts were 'pure. My father once thought about escaping but the Secret Police came to torture him and sent him to a re-education camp. I never saw him again. I first went to school when I was 14 and all we did was worship Kim Jong I like he was a god from morning to afternoon. We were never allowed to sleep for more than 4 hours and 15 minutes a day (this is because Kim Il Sung was born 4/15). When I went to university, we had to memorize every word Kim lI Sung ever spoke from birth. If we messed up, we'd be sent to labor camp (10 years for every misspoken word). Not only did we not have electricity, there was no sunlight in North Korea either. Unlike the rest of the world, we only got 30 minutes of sunlight a day (we lived in pitch darkness).

I used to think success was driving down a beach-front highway having to choose between breathing in the new car smell from your convertible, or putting the top down for some salt air.
1 week ago, I had neither of those choices and today the very thought of beach air and new car smell makes me fucking sick.
Before I get into this, let me be clear: this is not a confession of guilt for anything I’ve done. I never wanted all this shit. From the very start it was only about one thing: Getting my son, James a birthday present.
I wasn’t even trying to get him the BEST or the BIGGEST or the most EXPENSIVE birthday present. Just
A present. The present I set out to get.
But instead...
I went to the 7/11 on Santa Monica and bought a MegaMillions lotto ticket.
My name is Daniel Baxter, and this is the day I thought I won the lottery.
​
April 8, 2022 – 2:03AM
It’s 2 o’clock in the morning and I’m at the Hollywood Casino. I’ve got every penny to my name spread across the craps table and some dickhead on his bachelor party holds the dice of fate in his clammy little hands.
My last 3 meals have been from discarded room service trays at LAX Hilton, my truck doesn’t start without a prayer and the tires have been leaking air for the last month which is fine because now I know the location of every free air filling station in LA County.
If I’d paid my phone bill, it’d be buzzing a crater in my leg from my ex, Lenora, asking if I’d picked up our son’s birthday gift with the $200 she gave me.
“Gave me” isn’t quite the right term. She handed it to me with a scowl then told me “if you gamble this shit you’ll never fucking see him again.” Things had been tense lately.
But none of that matters because this guy’s been hot and it’s with his help that I’ve turned that 200 hundred into almost 3 grand. The only question is; are the rhythms with me or not?
Maybe you call it God. Maybe you call it Karma or the natural vibe of the earth or mercury or whatever. When the rhythms are on, everything goes your way. You crush your yearly review at work and get the raise you’re after or you’re at some party and you’ve got everyone eating outta the palm of your hand.
Most things are math. Craps is math. Poker is math. Phone bills are math. Divorce rates are math and if I keep having to eat off of room service trays, the likelihood of me waking up with diarrhea is math.
It’s all just probability. But when the rhythms are on, the probability doesn’t matter. You could take a 1 and a million shot back-to-back and hit it twice. That’s what the rhythm can do for you.
Summer of 2018 I was up over 2 million. I couldn’t lose a hand of blackjack, I couldn’t crap out if I tried, I couldn’t say the wrong thing to Lenora and every time I walked into the room my son, James, would light up like a fucking lantern.
It used to be me and Lenora at the tables. The place was always open, the food is fine and the drinks are free. If we weren’t at the tables we were in the lounge talking Black Jack strategy or in the bar talking game theory or hanging out at the slots like a couple’a mice pressing a button and waiting for the cheese to pop out.
Sometimes it’s nice to be a mouse. I’ve got rats in my house. They don’t pay rent or go food shopping. All they have to do is avoid eating a piece of death cheese or poison and honestly that’s not too far off from how I live anyways.
When we had James, things changed though. As Lenora put it “risking your son’s dinner isn’t chasing something it’s chasing nothing.” And I guess the 45-minute commute to the Hollywood wasn’t a valuable use of her time. Lots of people commute to work even longer. When I was working at Goldman, I commuted an hour and a half each way from Connecticut. Granted I was on a train but the point is we all commute to work.
It was nice having her here. It was nice seeing James with a smile. It was nice to check my bank account and feel a life raft around me, rather than a black hole forming in my bellybutton.
But the rhythms shifted.
Now it’s just me here next to Lenny with the beard, Jackie with the cigar and Jonie who’s been serving drinks here so long her face should be on the highway billboards. After Lenora broke it off with me she got together with Kelton who works for a hedge fund which (for the record) is still gambling. He’s just doing it with other people’s money.
James’ 9th birthday is three days away. He wants an iPad and soon as I cash out, I’ll be able to pick one up, maybe kick some back to Lenora and spread some cash around to the litany of people I’m on the hook to.
I’m one big night away from wiping it all out. I just need one hit. One night of pure rhythm... and I’ll be back.
The shooter shakes the dice in his hand then tosses ‘em. I watch them clack on the table walls below me, but before they even settle on the pass line, I can already feel the star implode in my stomach.
In a flash, my hard work is raked away by some new guy named Carl with a moustache and not a single ounce of sympathy.
The party’s at Lenora (and Kelton’s) which was fine because honestly, I didn’t just have rats.
The rats came in chasing the cockroaches but when a bunch of them got into my Cadbury Mini Egg stash and died under the living room floor, a pack of fleas picked the carcass clean before making their way into the carpet above. So, yeah...at the moment I have fleas, cockroaches and rats. I had a bug bomb guy coming in a couple days but things were gonna be a little itchy until then.
It's three days until the party. I’ve got no gift and if I show up without that 200 bucks I may never see my kid again.
​
April 8, 2022 – 6:32AM
There’s only so much you can do on a security guard’s salary and being paid $12 an hour to guard millions of dollars in Mercedes automobiles is hilarious. What am I supposed to do if some guy comes in to steal a car? Lay my life on the line and hope my out-of-pocket HMO covers bullet wounds?
I don’t even have dental. I got a root canal that needed to be recapped 10 minutes after it was put in.
I’ve been on Mr. Jenkins about a raise but he keeps telling me “we gotta sell more cars, Davey,” as if I’m the one selling cars. I’m a fucking security guard what the hell’s that gotta do with me? Last I checked it was my job to keep cars on the lot and getting them off was yours.
Jenkins owns every car dealer on Van Nuys. Maybe you’ve seen his ads on TV where he slides into frame wearing a suit while riding a surfboard just to say “COME ON DOWN!” He can afford to buy a surfboard for tv ad that has no mention of surfing or aquatic sports of any kind but he can’t pay me an extra $3 an hour so I can re-introduce cold foods to my diet.
I spend most of my shift eyeing the mint green on onyx black SLS convertible they keep in the lobby. It’s flashy but it’s got a nut sack under the hood so you know you could back it up if you went toe-to-toe with some clown at a red light. Sometimes I just stare at it but I never touch it. I only wanna touch it when it’s mine. Which it would be...
Maybe I could steal it and sell it to get the iPad and some other shit. I know all the codes but then again I wouldn’t need the whole car. The thing costs half a mill. Maybe I could lift a rear-view mirror. Who would notice? Then again with the way the rhythm’s set I’d probably bump into the fucking FBI on the way out.
I’ve been doing my best to get things together but the cards aren’t falling my way and there’s not much you can really do about that. I’ve been going to the Hollywood for 15 years so I know I’m due for a run.
Me and Lenny talking about this all the time at the lounge. Sometimes you’re on the downbeat and sometimes you’re on the upbeat. Lately I feel like it’s been all downs but the thing about being a father though, is that you’re not the only one on that ride.
It used to be that I could take a few down weeks or months even. Sleep in the car, call the landlord and talk them out of breaking down the door but when you got a kid everything changes. You suffer, he suffers. Lately Lenora’s been paying for that but you see she keeps a tally. She says she doesn’t but she does.
Every time she has to pay for something she looks at me like I’m the biggest piece of shit then says “It’s ok, David.” Which it really isn’t.
The fees and stuff aren’t the real problem. It’s being able to take James out and take care of him. She wants to take that away from me and honestly I don’t blame her.
Last week my card got declined trying to pay for ice cream. James had already eaten half of his and the lady made us give it back. He didn’t talk to me the whole way home then 2 days later Lenora told me James didn’t really like spending time with me anymore. A week after that she filed for sole custody and told me they were thinking about moving to Chicago. Who the fuck would want to live there? It’s cold as fuck and the people are assholes.
​
April 8, 2022 – 12:20PM
I do pickups for a porta-john company on the side. It’s just temporary. I don’t clean the shit I just spray down the units and suck out cans and shit with a wet-vac before this guy named Pete sticks a hose in the back and drains the whole thing out.
I’m always surprised by what people put on the walls of a john. Usually it’s just drawings like hearts and shit but sometimes the rhythm finds you there too. One time I spotted a phone number Sharpied on a toilet seat but it was missing 1 number. 8 digits. Kinda like 4 roulette numbers right?
I took em to the Hollywood and won 5 grand on one roll! Hasn’t worked again for me yet... but that’s the thing about it man.
But today I’m cleaning out a row of johns after some music festival which by the way is far and away the worst clean ups to get. Sure you see these kids all cleaned up online in some tweed outfit or some shit but you should see the shit that comes out of these kids. It’s like paving tar with glitter and red bull cans.
I look down in the last john I’m hosing down and I see something. Peaking out of the mounds I see: a $20 bill.
I stared at it for a second but I could hear Pete coming down the line about to suck it into oblivion. I never seen cash in the john before. Sometimes you hear a coin clank through the hose but a 20 bill just staring you right in the face?
I did what any man would do. I grabbed it and when I pulled my hand out I was half expecting it to be missing a layer of skin.
Later I’m sitting in the truck staring at this 20 bucks thinking “why would this come to me?” There had to be a reason. It wasn’t just on the floor of some john. It was in the last john after the nastiest event at a time when all I needed was one shot.
It was the rhythm.
But having to do that for just $20 didn’t add up. There had to have been a greater purpose and you know what they say about money. You don’t let it sleep. You wanna get that money out and get it working.
Craps kicked my teeth in this morning and you can’t do shit with 20 bucks on a blackjack table. I had to think bigger.
Then I’m driving home from work and I see the 7/11. Powerball was at 2.11 BILLION. The biggest in history. If you got all 6 numbers right you got the whole chicken. If you got 5 you got just shy of 8 million bucks. Boom.
I had my usual numbers but this wasn’t a usual day. I told the cashier to give me “all randoms today.” 10 slips at $2 each.
That night I sat down on my couch waiting for the Powerball to come on tv... then I blacked out.
The next thing I knew I was staring at 6 numbers lit up on my tv screen: 08, 07, 14, 29, 40, 16
And on my slip: 08, 07, 14, 29, 40, 22
I had 5 out of 6 numbers. I’d just won 8 million dollars
​
April 9, 2022 – 9:01AM
I’m standing in line at the California Lottery Offices. It’s not some huge expansive place. It’s a shitty little line up of people with various ailments trying to dispute their $5 winning ticket.
My mind is racing. Who do I pay back first? Do they give me the cash here? Is it in a duffel bag? When do I have to hold that big ass check? Do I wear a mask? I saw a guy do it in a scream mask once to maintain his anonymity. Honestly it might be nice to be seen. Not only has everyone seen me as a piece of shit forever but also I haven’t exactly kept a detailed list of everyone I owe money to.
It’d be good for people to just hit me up, I can cut a check and tell them “thanks for your patience.” Maybe I’d even give them a little off the top as a tip.
The guy a the counter basically spat in my face; “It’s gotta be reviewed. Takes 2-5 days. We’ll email you a link to collect any winnings.” It was like I just accused him of something. No congratulations or anything which at first, I was pissed about but then I realized that clearly I wasn’t the first asshole who thought they won the lottery.
Except I really did. 2-5 days was nothing. I’d been living in the shit for years I could do another few days.
Stepping outside, everything looked the same. The air wasn’t purer or the sunlight any more sunlightier and I still had to fill up my tires at the Shell on Cahuenga. There’s something about being rich without actually having any appearance of being rich.
That secret alone is like having a bomb in your pocket. People treat you regular, they smile and make conversation but deep down you think...if I pulled this out I could kill you with it.
But when people do think you have money, the more of it they give you.
I rolled in the doors of the Hollywood like I always did. Lenny called me a bullshitter, Jackie barely even put her cigarette down and Jonie didn’t even bring me a drink because I didn’t actually have any money on the table. I didn’t even have money in my pocket. I’d spent it all on the Megamillions and I hadn’t eaten since perusing the halls for leftover room service the night before.
Then news hit. My face was on every TV in the place. “Local man wins 8 million dollar jackpot.”
I checked my phone to see if it was blowing up, then remembered I still hadn’t paid the bill in months. So I was good there.
​
April 9, 2022 – 11:11AM
If you’ve ever been on a casino floor you know that it’s never silent. But I swear to God if you were on the floor when that news hit, you could’ve heard the rats eating my Mini Eggs 20 miles away. Everyone’s eyes were trained on me. For a second I even felt all the security cams shift over in my direction.
I couldn’t stand being on the floor with nothing to play with so Lenny set me up with his guy who got me a little walking around money. Japanese guy who I met in a Burger King across the street. Weird dude. Not sure what his name was.
I didn’t wanna go too nuts so I just took out a small loan. 50k at 20 points. I thought about it for a second then realized I didn’t really give a shit about the interest. 10 grand to me in a week doesn’t mean nearly as much as 50 does now. It’s just value proposition. It would have been stupid NOT to take out the loan honestly.
Walking into the casino with 50 grand in my pocket and slamming it down on the table feels a lot like taking out your dick at an orgy only when your dick comes out it’s a 60 foot cigarette boat with flames painted on the side.
But then I learned what I remembered years ago. Losing money and gaining money at that point meant almost nothing.
So losing 2 grand a hand wasn’t such a big deal because I could be making 5 on the next. That’s why I needed a little more when I lost the full 50.
Another 100k or so at another 20 points should do the trick.
It didn’t take long to realize that both winning and losing money meant almost nothing to me. So I ventured out.
A tailored suit for me (ready in 2-3 days on a rush).
An iPad for James with all the bells and whistles.
6 dozen roses sent to Lenora’s house signed “your secret admirer.” just to fuck with Kelton.
A watch for me, Lenny and Jodie.
Some special cigar Jackie had always been eyeing.
New pairs of Nikes for all of us.
And a limousine to my dentist’s office.
I paid in cash for the cap replacement, they gave me some pills and told me not to mix them with alcohol but honestly I was a little distracted by the old molar cap sitting on the table. I had an idea.
“Are you gonna just throw that away?” I asked her.
By now I realized I didn’t have a phone to receive my winnings via email. So, I stopped a guy in the lobby and paid him 2 grand cash for his before popping a few pills and slugging some champagne in the limo.
There was barely enough time to sit back and relax. I had a lifetime of debt and yearning for shit to burn through.
We made it to the Mercedes dealership but the pain killers kicked in and I could barely feel my hands as they ran across the SLS’s mint green paint. Bummer.
Jenkins sauntered over asking if I was working today and all I remember saying was “I want it.” He scrunched his eyebrows in confusion, so I put the remaining cash I had down on the table and said it again. “I WANT IT.”
They ran my credit (which was dog shit. Didn’t matter) and I looked Jenkins in his fat little face again and said “I don’t give a fuck.” He sold it to me, financed at 25 percent interest. Then when he went to fetch my paperwork and keys I took a shit on his desk, shoved the molar cap and a $20 bill in it before using his jacket to wipe my ass. Felt right. Don’t really know why.
I had walked into the CA lottery offices at 9am to start the review process on my ticket’s authenticity.
By 11am, I was watching news break from the Hollywood Casino.
By 10pm I had accrued more debt than a small country.
I hadn’t received a dime from the lotto.
And I needed more walking around money.
​
April 10, 11, 12 – who the fuck knows what time
The next few days were a blur but there are a few things I’ll never forget.
Quitting my job.
Hiring the limo for the week.
Trying to shit after 3 days of having nothing but fast food, champagne and pain killers.
Fielding questions at the party from Kelton’s asshole friends who told me “lotto rich isn’t real rich.”
And the heat of my house burning to the ground as James and I stood there watching with a can of gas in our hands.
He didn’t even want the iPad.
The rhythms were sliding back. James had that smile plastered back in his face and even Lenora was happy to see me.
​
April 16, 7:35AM
“Dear Mr. Baxter. Congratulations! You’ve successfully matched FOUR of six winning numbers. Below please find a link to collect your winnings of $10,000.”
I read it over and over again. Over and over and over.
When I called the offices an nice woman on the phone informed me that due to a printing malfunction the ticket had appeared to show the number 8 when in fact it was a 6.
They even managed to maintain a sense of excitement. I mean why wouldn’t they? They think I just won $10,000. They had no idea I’d bought a car I couldn’t afford, burned my house down, taken a shit on my boss’ desk, maxed out 3 new credit cards and borrowed a inordinate amount of money from people at a borderline illegal interest rate.
The limo company took my ride away and with no home I’ve spent the last 2 days parked on the Pacific Coast Highway, sleeping in the brand new Mercedes I can’t afford, in a suit I shouldn’t have bought, showering in the YMCA down the street, and eating 2-day-old coconut shrimp.
All of a sudden I’m fucked again. But as I stare out at the Pacific, my phone dings. It’s an alert from the Chase banking app. My lotto winnings of $10,000 have just hit my account and the only question is...
Are the rhythms with me or not?

As I stated in my first post, my wife started a surprise 52-book challenge for me this year. This means I read a randomly selected book that she has wrapped based on a number generator. Here are the second set of eight random books I got, and my little mini-reviews.
9. The Last Song - This book started off a little slow for me, but I love a book that can make me cry. This book achieved that. I love the slow build and the character growth just in a short amount of time. I loved the fathedaughter relationship throughout the story. It made me wish that my father and I could have repaired our relationship. Spoiler ahead, if you don’t want one of the main points ruined, skip this. Then you add the death of her father and losing my father in early 2022 it really drove the point home. This was my first experience with Nicholas Sparks. I’m excited to read more of his books. I was not expecting to have enjoyed the book as much as I did but ended up giving this book a 10 out of 10. The second perfect score of 2023.
10. A Dirty Job - Ever wonder what it would be like to be the Grim Reaper? A Dirty Job allows you get to explore this through the eyes of a new father who just lost his wife. One of my biggest coping mechanisms growing up was humor, so I love a good book that includes a lot of humor and when it makes me actually makes me laugh out loud, then you know it covers the humor category. One thing about this book is it’s not for the faint of heart. Christopher Moore has a hell of a mind and he doesn’t hold back in the graphic nature of his writing. If that doesn’t bother you and you enjoy a funny but engaging story, try giving this one a go. I gave this book an 8 out of 10.
11. Black Cake - Damn. That is all I want to say about how amazing this book is. It follows Byron and Benny as they learn about their family history. Honestly, this is another book that I think everyone should pick up. I don’t want to spoil a single thing about it, just read it. I gave this book a 10 out of 10. The third perfect score of 2023.
12. Fairy Tale - A modern retelling of a few fairy tales tied into one. Stephen King really captures the essence of telling a fairy tale. This is not his typical style of books and that is what I liked about it. It follows a young man as he discovers an additional world and his journey through the adventure of the world. It gave me modern The Chronicles of Naria vibes, but more towards an adult audience. The characters and his ability to build a universe are really what brought this book to life. If you are a fan of his writing style and world-building, this is definitely a good book to read. If you are more of a fan of his horror style, this might be a pass. I loved it and gave this book an 8 out of 10.
13. Matched - Matched is very similar to the idea behind The Giver. I prefer this, though The Giver is a classic. This one had (in my opinion) a more interesting lead character. I wasn’t fully drawn into the story but enjoyed it enough to want to know how it will continue to progress. I enjoyed the characters, though none of them really stood out, and the development of the main character throughout the story. As I said, I wasn’t completely drawn in, but as the story continued to progress, I could see myself liking it quite a bit. I gave this book a 6 out of 10.
14. The Notebook - Everyone said I was going to love this book, and it’s no surprise that I loved it. It’s a classic (yes, I know it was published in 1996) love story. The characters are beautifully written; the story is sad but lovely, and the plot draws you in. I feel as if I’m the last woman on earth to read this book, but I’m certainly glad that I picked it up. After giving The Last Song a perfect score, I was extremely excited to draw another Nicholas Sparks book. I thought that The Last Song was a better read (more personal for me) but both books deserve top scores. I also gave this one a 10 out of 10. The fourth perfect score in 2023.
15. The Selection - I started this book knowing that I was going to absolutely not like it. I have a friend who she and I have very similar reading tastes and she doesn’t like the series at all. However, was pleasantly surprised by how much I actually enjoyed the main character. I don’t like how the story ended and don’t like how she ended up treating the main (or secondary depending on how you look at it) love interest, but all in all, I really like the story. I think it will continue to get better and better as I read the rest of the eight books. Also, I feel that if the story doesn’t go the way I want it to go, then I’m going to be very disappointed in it as a whole, but I still have hope. I gave this one a 7 out of 10.
16. Once Upon a Broken Heart - I freaking love this story. It’s got everything you could want. A deeply flawed main character, a few little twists and turns along the way, a weird relationship, and rooting for the “villain”. “Villian” in quotation marks, because you really don’t know who the villain truly is in the story. I love the main character and how the story develops and can’t wait to continue the next book and will pick up the last book as soon as it comes out later this year. I gave this book a 9 out of 10.
17. Beast - Review coming in the next set of books.
​
Did ya miss my first post? Here are the reviews for books 1-12:
1. Twilight - I didn't think I would enjoy this one, as I have already seen the movies, but it pleasantly surprised me. Yes, it's a little childish, and as of the standard vampire reads, I prefer the Sookie Stackhouse stories, but it was good. I'm interested in reading the rest of the story and will start them after I finish the 52 books and the Sweep Series. I gave this book a 7 out of 10.
2. All Grown Up - I did not know what it was about when I bought this book. I only picked it up because it is a Book of the Month book (and I collect them). However, this was an excellent read. It follows a regular woman and her life. It's not perfect, but it's hers. I love the way the story plays out and the person the story follows. I highly recommend this book to everyone that just wants a different read. This book is a must-read, and I gave it a 10 out of 10.
3 . Emerald City - Another random thrift book find. It was one of the last books I bought in 2022. Trigger warning up front, this book talks about suicide. It follows a young woman who has reached her limits in life and tries to take her own life, only to be saved by her nosey neighbor. She has a story after that moment and what it takes to rebuild her life. It was a tough read for me (as my brother commented suicide and all I could think about was how I wished a nosey neighbor had saved him). Though it was a tough read, it was definitely a good one, and I would recommend it to anyone who can get past the trigger warning. I gave this book an 8 out of 10.
4. All the Light We Cannot See - I've learned something over the last few years. I'm the type of girl that loves Historical Fiction. Some of my favorite books in the past few years have fallen into this category. All the Light We Cannot See is another wonderfully written story. It follows multiple characters as they progress through World War II. I could say so much more about this story, but I don't want to spoil it. If you like historical fiction, read this book. I gave it an 8 out of 10.
5. Lightlark - This one hooked me from the very beginning. The book begins with these two lines: Isla Crown often fell through puddles of stars and into faraway places. Always without permission—and seemingly on the worst occasions. Honestly, it had me intrigued, and that never went away. I wanted to know what was happening throughout the entire story. I loved the main character, Isla. She is a flawed but determined individual, which I can easily relate to. My biggest issue with this book is that as of finishing it, there is no expected release date for the sequel. This is another book that I would say is a must-read if you like young adult fantasy with twists and turns. I gave this one 9 out of 10.
6. Stalking Jack the Ripper - This is part whodunit, part classic criminology story. Everyone knows the story of Jack the Ripper, but this is a twist on that story with a dash of feminism and a nice little twist. Again it had me from the very beginning, "I placed my thumb and forefinger on the icy flesh, spreading it taut above the breastbone as Uncle had showed me." This story was so good that I devoured it in a single day. Normally read multiple books, at the same time, ‌to adjust for my low attention span, but I could not put this down. I spent eight hours on a gloomy Sunday reading this entire book and I wouldn’t change a thing. I can’t wait to read the rest of this series and probably would have already finished them all if I wanted to read through the rest of the surprise books. This one almost made me put a pause on that just to read more. I again would say it’s a must-read. I also gave this one a 9 out of 10.
7. The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue - I dislike talking badly about books. As a lesbian, I thought this book would be right up my alley with its LGBTQ themes. Plus, it came highly recommended by the internet, and usually, they are not wrong. However, I found this book hard to connect to. The main character is a self-indulgent ass and though he grows tremendously during the book, I couldn’t help but not like his character. He was very self-centered and put his friends and family at risk for his own selfish needs. I, however, can’t wait for the next book in this series, as it follows the main character's sister. The development of that character in the book is something I like. She was always blunt and to the point, never allowing her circumstances to hold her back. I do not recommend this book, but it is very popular on the internet. I gave this book a 4 out of 10 and felt that was generous.
8. And I Darken - I don’t know what to say about this book. I can’t tell if I liked it or not… I simply think I need to keep reading the series to judge the book. It was not what I was expecting. I liked most of the characters; the plot had a few twists and turns, and the story was appealing, all things I like, but I don’t know. I guess I felt like it could have been better, and I expect it to get better as the series progresses. It was really picking up at the end of the story and building into something I thought would work. It has two more books in the series and I hope the sequel continues to build upon the final few chapters and add to the world. I gave this a 6 out of 10.

The further we get from S14, the more I realize I love it. It is far and away my favorite post-S6 season. What's more, I even enjoyed it as it aired (!), and didn't have to learn to love it after the fact (as many of us did with S7 and S11). Why was S14 so great? Let's dive in.
(Also- I'm going to compare S14 to S15 a lot, b/c S15 is in my recent memory. This is not a S15 diss post!!! I have *moderately* enjoyed S15. It is better than S13 at least).
Possible reasons:

• Very strong cast that was edited well. I'd like to break down the idea of a "strong cast" a bit further. A "strong cast" doesn't just mean queens that are good drag queens or good at drag race. It means queens that are compelling characters to watch on drag race as a TV show. What are the characteristics that contribute to that?

1. Strong personality in werkroom/on stage, or being a good narratogiving good confessional (ex. Katya, Gia Gunn, Bianca Del Rio)
2. Edited to have coherent narrative that involves conflict and/or growth- either internal, with the show, or with another contestant (ex. Adore, Laganja, Gottmik)
3. Provide unique and/or emotionally compelling drag in segments of the show that allow queens to have individual creative authority (ex. Anetra's lip syncs, BendelaCreme's Snatch Games, Symone's runway package, Willow's talent show performance)
4. Provide stellar but standard performances in run of the mill challenges on the show (ex. Courtney's Rusical performance, Loosey's Joan Rivers Snatch Game, Bianca's roast set)
5. Deliver "so bad it's good" challenge performances, (ex. LalaRi's Bag Ball look, Kahmora Hall's acting challenge performance, Sugar and Spice's Snatch Games)

Let's compare a few season to see how queens stack up according to these characteristics. If a queen only somewhat fulfilled a characteristic, I put it in parentheses ().
​

Season 14	Season 6	Season 15
June Jumbalaya (1), 2	Magnolia 1	Irene (1)
Alyssa Hunter (3)	Kelly 5	Poppy
Kornbread 1, 2, 3	Vivacious 1, 3	Sugar 2, (3), 5
Orion (2)	April 3	Amethyst 3
Maddy (1), 2, 3	Gia 1, 2	Robin
Kerri 1, 3	Milk 1, 2, 3, (4)	Aura (1)
Jasmine 2, 3	Laganja 1, 2, (4)	Jax 3
Jorgeous (1), 3	Trinity 2, 3, (4)	Spice (1), 2, (3), 5
Deja, 1, 4	Joslyn 1, 2, 3, 4, 5	Malaysia (2)
Daya 1, 2, 3, 4	Bendela 1, 2, 3, (4)	Marcia 2, 3, (4)
Bosco 1, 2, 3, 4	Darienne 1, 2, 4	Salina 1, (2), (5)
Angeria 1, (3), 4	Courtney 1, 2, (3), 4	Loosey (1), 2, 4, (5)
Lady Camden 1, 2, 3, 4	Adore 1,2, 3, 4	Luxx 1, 2, 4
Willow 1, (2), 3, 4	Bianca 1, 2, 3, 4	Mistress 1, 2, 4
		Anetra 1, 2, 3, 4
		Sasha 1, 3, 4

​
Looking at S14 and S6 as compared to S15, a big difference we can see is that the early outs have multiple characteristics to their names, especially the number 1. characteristic- a big personality. Of course, S15 suffers *a lot* in this regard from its giant cast and shortened run time.
Another thing that S14 and S6 share is that most queens have the 3. characteristic- they showcase drag perspectives or performances that feel unique on Drag Race. Ex. Alyssa and April both have very strong and interesting runway packages. Kornbread delivered a stellar talent show performance. Vivacious, with her background in the NYC club kid scene, was a style of queen we hadn't seen on drag race before. This is another place that S15 really suffers- we just haven't seen most of the queens do anything really uniquely interesting this season. The only exceptions to that have been Anetra, Sasha, and Jax's lipsyncs, Marcia and Anetra's talent show performances, Sasha's first acting challenge, and, dare I say it... Amethyst's snatch game as Tan Mom (that one might be a personal preference lol).
Lastly, with S6 and S15, we can see that almost all of the late-out/finalist girlies have most of the characteristics. On S15, Anetra is the only one that does. I definitely think this a reason why she is so popular in the fandom right now. I also think this shows why Sasha has gotten less popular in the fandom as the season has gone on- she hasn't had any sort of narrative arc (characteristic 2) on the show. Even though Willow didn't have conflict with other girls or with herself on the show, in her confessionals, she presented the meta-narrative of having conflict with the show itself- she had to play the long game and gradually acclimate the judges and the show to the weirder and more interesting parts of her drag. Bianca, though she had a similar competitive arc (dominating the competition) and character archetype (statesman of drag, too big for the show) to Sasha, had a much stronger narrative arc- she had lots of conflict with the younger girls on the season, and gradually had to learn to care for them and not present herself as a stone cold b*tch. Sasha is amazing, and fully realized, and not afraid to be stupid from the get-go, and... not that interesting of a Drag Race character.
​

• This is more cut and dry- S14 had a lot of great lip syncs, from a lot of different queens, to multiple types of songs. (Again, contrast this to S15- we've had good lip syncs, but they've all been similar high energy pop numbers, delivered by the same 3 queens).

1. Deja in "Fallin'"
2. Jasmine in "Sugar Mama" (this was the only valid use of the floor hump move (Sorry, Anetra))
3. Lady Camden in "One Way or Another"
4. Jasmine and Jorgeous in "Something's Got a Hold on Me"
5. Camden in "Don't Let Go"

​

• Unique challenges, good performances from the cast in standard challenges, and challenges that manage to reference and make fun of the lore of the show without becoming entirely recursive.
• Unique challenges

1. Lip Sync Lalaparuza (since this is the first time we saw it in a non-all-stars season, with actual stakes attached to it)

• Good performances in "standard" challenges

1. "Menzeses" (this was the panel hosting challenge)
2. 60s Girl Groups
3. Moulin Ru: the Rusical
4. The Ross Matthews Roast (I'm not sure we've had such a large group of good roast performances since S5)

• Good "reference but not recursive" challenges

1. "She's a Super Tease"- allowed queens to poke fun at previous character archetypes and drama on the show, gave queens individual creative power to decide how they wanted to do it
2. "Save a Queen"- brought back queens that the audience could already connect with, let current queens interact with them and build commercials that played with and made fun of the moments they were known for on their original seasons.
3. "Daytona Winds"- made fun of the way the show's acting challenges had become somewhat earnest affairs in overracting that had moved away from the show's original premise of acting challenge as parody

Note: "Daytona Winds 2" in S15 is a great example of a Drag Race challenge that is *too* recursive.
​

• The judges, especially RuPaul, like this group of queens. There are a lot of queens this season that are confident onstage and in front of the judges (Willow, Bosco, Camden, Angeria, Deja, Daya, Kerri, Kornbread, Jorgeous), and this enables the judges to be more comfortable and playful with the contestants. For example, contrast S14's "Who murdered Snatch Game" scene to like... *all* of the judging on UK3. Completely different vibes, and S14's is eminently more enjoyable to watch. (For what it's worth, S14 is also relatively devoid of queen archetypes that Ru doesn't like, I'll get into that later though).

​

• S14 definitely *does* have pacing issues, but there are very few individual episodes that I don't care for. I don't care about the first ball, or the opening talent show episodes, but that's about it. As for queens not going home... the twist to bring back the first eliminated queens is redeemed by what a great character Daya makes herself into. The episodes where no one goes home, while stalling the momentum of the season, are individually some of the best episodes in the season, with various redeeming qualities (Daytona Wind, Menzeses, Snatch Game, Moulin Rouge). I think S14's competitive tension, much like S6, suffers the most in the last couple episodes- by the Ross Matthews Roast, the frontrunners (Willow, Camden) and finalists (Angeria, Bosco, Daya) are set. The major character arcs of the season have concluded. We don't lose much by losing Deja and Jorgeous. What remaining competitive tension might be salvaged in "Catwalk"- will Daya become a frontrunner? which of the top 5 will be eliminated?- is completely neutered by throwing another win to Camden and allowing a top 5. Bad job editors. That said, the top queens and their performances still make these episodes fun.

​

• The top 5 queens, for the most part, are strong characters, good performers, do interesting drag, and are edited well on the show, and the top 3 did things that were completely novel to the show.

​
Angeria is the only one who suffers here. Her competitive narrative on the show doesn't really progress beyond the first few episodes. She emerges as an early frontrunner and...that's about it. She's fun in confessionals, but she has a pretty laidback personality, so she doesn't get into fights with other girls and build her narrative that way. Her drag persona (backwoods glamorous pageant queen who has a bit of a silly edge) is fairly well-realized, familiar on the show, and established early on in the season. We don't learn anything new about Angeria after the first few episodes. She's a good enough performer to stay in the top for most of the season, but she's not quite canny enough to channel her own style or personality through the Drag Race challenges in ways that would make her stand out, beyond her initial talent show performance. The dichotomy between pageant glamour and a silly personality *is* interesting, but the show's not really interested in exploring that. On the runway, her aesthetic is top of the line pageant drag. It's good and lands on the side of "expensive and elegant" pageant-wear over "expensive and tacky" pageant-wear... but it is pageant-wear and we've seen it before. I don't know if Angie would be a great pitch for All Stars, and I don't know that her WtW would go outside the pageant-queen high-kick/strut box, but I would love to see her on a DragCon panel or a podcast.
Bosco's greatest virtue to the season is as a narrator- whether in challenges (Menzeses, Roast), confessionals, or on the main stage with the judges. Bosco's also not afraid to narrate her own inner turmoil (it is her brand of comedy), which is fantastic, given that her latter season arc has her ping-ponging between top and bottom placements in an ever more fragile metal state. Does her competitive narrative ever really have legs after the Rusical? Nope. Camden absolutely kneecaps her. And a standout Roast performance can only redeem so many bra and panty sets. But do I care? Nope. Bosco still makes the journey fun for us. What's more, we don't get many burlesque queens on the show that make it far, so while the bra and panty sets were repetitive unto Bosco, they still felt more interesting to me than a lot of Deja's takes that ranged in the "this popular drag designer made this for me and 20 other queens, but the other 19 paid more for it" and "Jiggly might have worn this on S4" styles, or the back half of Angeria's pageant closet. Even when Bosco's fashion was bad, it was interesting. That short short little wig? I still don't know how I feel about it. The last episode's crylon Judy Jetson space hooker hunger games mom, *with* the short short little wig? Nothing has ever been so delightfully crunchy. Bosco will be an absolute blast on all stars, the bras and panties will be ever more expensive, and she'll come a lovely 3rd alternate ala Jujubee.
Daya- rarely in recent seasons have we gotten a good villain storyline, even more rarely did the villain become an antihero, and never until Daya did we get a queen that battled back from: first bootness, a family connection to an earlier season queen the judges considered "superlative," and the producers' disinterest in her and dismissal as a filler queen. The fandom loves Daya and rightfully so. Daya showed in spite of all of that that she could produce great TV and be a great drag race queen. I would also count Daya's aesthetic eye as second only to Willow's this season (babydoll dresses aside. we all have our weaknesses.) Daya delivered several standout looks that took a defined aesthetic and gave it a distinctly Daya twist (chaps look, KISS look, catwalk video, final runway). I have no complaints with Daya, only with the producers' treatment of her. They continued to do her dirty! Her narrative would've been better served by a final win in "Catwalk," which in turn with her finale performance, should've propelled her to the final 2 over Camden. That aside, can't wait to see what she'll do on All Stars. Will she win? I have complete faith in Daya. I have 0% faith in the editors. Look for a weird joint-style win ala Trinity and Monet in All Stars 4.
​
Willow- there is no doubt to me that Willow ran S14 just as much as Symone ran S13 or Sasha is running S15, but it wasn't smothering in the way that 13 or 15 felt. Granted, Willow had better, more interesting competition. But Willow was also super savvy. She didn't need all the screentime or talk from competitors in the world to make it clear that she was a winner, not when she put her screentime to such good use. Though Willow was comparatively quiet and laidback, she was never boring. (Her edit was a *little* boring. Just a steady upward trajectory. But sue me for liking a bitch who knows she's in her top era!). She was great in confessional, with a sense of humor- blunt, morbid, and a bit smug- not often seen on drag race. In drag, she showed that she could be a great drag race queen (Super Tease, Menzezes, ball challenges, Daytona Winds), great at fitting her own aesthetic into drag race challenge roles (Green Fairy in Moulin Ru, 60s Girl Groups), and most importantly, an interesting queen outside of drag race.
Any time that Willow was able to deliver her own signature drag on the show, she was doing something completely unique to what we've seen on Drag Race. Let's go through the highlights:

• Talent show performance: Willow's talent show performance is visceral in a great way- digging into spaghetti with bare hands, tossing it in the bath, tossing the toaster and then herself in the bath- these are all actions that evoke very strong emotions- gluttony, disgust, horror, fear- specifically as they connect to the body and physical sensation. These are not emotions the Drag Race (vs. Dragula) generally draws on. Disgust appears on drag race occasionally, but typically in cheap jokes that are pretty played out (ex. feigning disgust at the scent of a vagina). And for a show that is based around the malleability of the body, Drag Race is remarkably squeamish about bodily sensations beyond sexual arousal (ex. feigning an orgasm is always ok, but making a fart joke or wearing a dress with period blood is not). However, there's a good reason that drag outside of Drag Race is often interested in evoking negative emotions. Emotions like disgust, shame, horror, and fear are strong enough to produce bodily sensations, often the same ones that lust or love produce. The body and its nervous system are great at crossing wires, so this means that these negative emotions do often become sexual referents in the form of kink. Willow doesn't draw on that sexual association in her talent show beyond the aesthetic juxtaposition of a hot girl in a bikini shoving her face with pasta, but...
• She gets into it a bit more in her lyrics for "Bad Boy Baby"- "His body is splattered on the asphalt/Yeah but it's kind of hot/Like he dropped a hot bowl of spaghetti." The lyrics explicitly intertwine the emotion of lust with the body, gore, horror, and disgust.
• A couple of Willow's runways also play towards the emotions associated with kink, in a way we haven't seen on the show before. Again, for a show that plays a lot with sexual presentation and attraction, Drag Race doesn't give much due to fetish beyond the very mainstream themes of leather, latex, bondage, and whips. I'd really argue that these themes are so mainstream as to have become largely divorced outside of explicit BDSM settings from their invoked emotional referents- fear, pain, anticipation, helplessness- that provoke bodily sensation. Willow's latex hair wedgie Matrix outfit (wow what a combo of words), and hobble panty dress for the Heart On runway are fresh takes on kink on the show.
• A *lot* of Willow's runway presentation deals with bodily distortion and the separation of the body from a cohesive whole into its component parts (ex. the latex wedgie with disembodied hands to hold her hair, spring runway with head trapped in a house, 2nd ball challenge outfit with crazy long arms, Donatella lips on frills runway, all 3 finale outfits- intro catwalk, I hate people, final lipsync). And yet again, Drag Race has historically been willing to play with bodily proportion and distortion... but only in the hyper-feminine direction of more hips and tits, and played out plastic surgery jokes.

All this to say is a was a lot of fun to see Willow turn drag race tropes on their heads. And Willow's just really good. She's an underrated winner. I wouldn't want to see her on Drag Race again, or work the world. She's way too cool for the Drag Race brand. She would be cool even if she never did drag again. I will very happily go see anything she independently produces.
​
I've saved Camden for last, because if you thought this post was already way too long, watch me write another 5000 words about drag race and its relationship with male drag. But before I get into all that, let's talk about Camden as a drag race character.
If Daya is the girl production hated, Camden is the girl they loved. I love a hidden frontrunner storyline, and production did a great job with Camden's. Once her edit picked up steam in Daytona Winds, it didn't slow down again. Camden was the girl that got to gradually steamroll the other frontrunners (Daya- Daytona Winds, Catwalk (however dubious), Bosco- Lalaparuza, Moulin Ru), only to face defeat at the hands of her final competitor, Willow, at the finale. Where Willow found success at shaping her challenge roles to fit her already well-defined drag aesthetic, Camden was the rare contestant who successfully expanded her drag repertoire to fit the challenges.
Camden also benefitted from being an archetype we haven't seen much of on Drag Race. You could call her a theatre queen, but that's not really true to her personality or her edit. Off-Broadway queens on the show are generally edited to have an off-putting sense of delusion, desperation, and self-seriousness. Camden, with the confidence that came from actually having performed professionally for years, was none of these things. I read her as a better-realized and more interesting variety of Shuga Cain's or Gottmik's archetype- a queen that turned to drag for personal reasons after already achieving professional success in a separate sphere, fell absolutely in love with drag, and was still figuring out how their personality and performance translated between their in and out of drag selves. Camden had the *large* benefit over Shuga and Gottmik of entering drag with: - classical dance training and performance experience, - a much more interesting set of aesthetic references, -amateur acting and comedy experience. Camden was having just as much fun as Shuga at figuring out who she could be in drag, but she and the edit were much better at letting us know about it- like Bosco, she was great at narrating herself, which made for a really fun journey from week to week with her.
Her aesthetic and performance choices were also hilariously chaotic throughout the season. In situations where she had creative control, she might choose to: -repeatedly reference Bunheads (I cannot emphasize enough how much this was a choice), or she might completely rock a 90s London underground raver look and performance, or she might show up in very expensive Frozen cosplay, or she might provide the look of the night as a crystallized porcelain ballerina, or she might show up in a cotton candy meets Flintstones outfit of Salina-Estitties-bad proportions (love u Salina <3), or she might show up as a slutty horse, carriage, bridle, and all... the list goes on and I don't want it to end!
I also appreciate the level of commitment Camden displayed towards her more questionable choices; when Michelle advised against a joke about yelling into Ross's asshole for the roast, Camden made it longer for her set. When Camden showed up to the finale and started off with a questionable choice- pony play outfit of dubious proportions- she continued making questionable choices all the way through the final lipsync performance!
And for all that we learned about Camden's drag on S14, I feel there's still more to unpack. Rarely is Drag Race this good for a queen. I cannot wait to see Camden on All Stars. Will she win? She will make it to the finals. She will make it to the final lip sync. But I cannot tell you if she will give an incredible and captivating lip sync performance or if she'll choose to make another bunheads reference. Only time will tell.
Now to unpack the most interesting things Camden did on S14, and why they were cool to see on Drag Race. This is actually a bit similar to Willow- both Willow and Camden at their best work in similar ways against the way that Drag Race generally chooses to frame the nexus of sexuality, gender, and attraction.
The vast majority of gendered drag presentation that we see on drag race runs very femme, and by virtue of that, we see a lot of interpretations of female sexuality. It's usually straightforward- glamorous, sexy, and it's subversive mostly in the fact that it's a queer reclamation of female sexualities as seen by the male gaze. I would say this is a true even of the femme dom portrayals that we see on Drag Race (ex. Jaida in Madonna rusical)- it's a pretty mainstream and straight idea of what a femme dom is supposed to be. Less frequently we see straight or queer female sexualities centered in a women's gaze (ex Joey Jay <3). Rarely do we see hard butch, nongendered, or androgynous presentations- to the point that it *really* starts to stand out when we do (ex. Mo Heart's butch queen on UK vs the world, Victoria Scone's genderbend on Canada vs. the world, Raja's androgynous looks on All Winners).
Notice that these are all runway examples that I've cited. We really don't see looks that range past mild butch in challenges (Snatch Game excepted). Queens may be interested in exploring all this, but drag race as a production and the judges are not. As for masculine presenting drag, it's even more rare. Queens may go in boy drag for challenges, but almost never on the runway. This is key.
When queens are in boy drag in challenges (rare SG examples excepted), they are:

• playing male characters with no sexual presentation (ex. boy characters in the S15 Rusical, Alaska's pee-wee herman drag on S5 in the children's show skit)
• playing heterosexual male characters that depict hetero male sexuality as a completely hokey premise and joke (ex. mini challenges throughout the years, TMZ reporters room in comedy sketch in all stars 5)
• playing a "neutered" gay or effeminate man with no effective sexual potential when presented out of female drag (ex. Sasha in S15 Rusical)

Most often when the show needs to display masculine-presenting sexuality for a challenge, they use a pit crew member or an outside actor (ex. Leland in Moulin Ru, Danny Trejo in Daytona Winds 2). (Leslie Jordan is a lovely exception to this by virtue of being Leslie Jordan). Even here, these men are rarely presenting queer male sexuality. They are almost always playing it straight. (For more on the drag queen/gogo boy dichotomy, see How to be Gay, there's some paragraphs on this somewhere in there.)
To explain why drag race does this, Sasha's performance in the latest Rusical is key. As an effeminate man on the drag race stage (that's the label we'll use for Carl since he *is* straight(?) married to female Preacher Teacher- she's kinda more butch than him tho), Carl has no sexual power or potential in his male drag. Carl's frumpy clothes and Sasha's performance illustrate this pretty well. For the effeminate or queer man on drag race to unlock his sexual potential, he must put on femme-presenting drag. See: Carl in the final number once transformed into Ethel Sperman.
This is why we don't see masculine-presenting drag on the runway, especially drag that reads as queer masculine. The runway, being a *pure presentation of aesthetics and form,* is the most direct embodiment of the transcendence that drag allows for the long-shamed "feminine" aspects of queer male sexuality to their glorification and empowerment when presented in the male-as-female drag form.
(Note: there is a lot to unpack with the term "feminine" and its relation to queer male sexuality. I'll keep it short here and say that when I say "feminine" in this context, I'm referring specifically to the aspects of weakness/sexual submission that are often implied in the term, and become shameful or transgressive when juxtaposed with traditional ideas of male sexualities).
I think for Rupaul on the show, especially in the earlier seasons, the link between the shame of queer male sexuality and the transcendence of that sexual shame that could only be reached through glamorous, regal, sexual, feminine drag was really really strong. There is a reason the first 3 winners of the show all fit that ideal. I think that goes a *long* way towards explaining:

• why Ru had problems with trans queens being on the show (Ru's perspective: what is drag doing for you if you've already embraced and accepted the feminine pieces of you in a very visible way/ are you still doing drag if you're not achieving this specific variety of emotional catharsis through it)
• why Ru and the judges reacted so badly to Alaska's male drag on S5 and Milk's "werkroom Ru" on S6 (male drag can't be drag b/c feminine transformation and its emotional underpinnings are essential to my idea of what drag is)

At the time, these all seemed like things that undermined the central thesis of the show. This also explains:

• why Ru can't connect with mentally well-adjusted queens (why do drag if you aren't trying to solve your personal problems with it/you've already come to terms with your femininity)
• why Run can't connect with "theatre queens" (you're coming to drag from a professional angle instead of a personal angle, so i don't find your drag emotionally compelling)

Also! Who's the queen we see in male drag in challenges on the show the most? It's Ru! RuPaul! (ex. acting scenes on S6 final challenge, RudePaul on S10, court room reporter on All Winners). RuPaul doesn't go in drag on the show to play characters other than RuPaul the Glamazon, and he expects contestants to treat their drag the same.
Also!Also! There is clear reasoning for why Ru would feel this way about drag- the gay culture of the 90s and 00's was *so* different to today, and before drag race and the efforts of a lot of advocacy, there was a much larger stigma in the gay community towards feminine men, trans women, and drag queens. If you want to hear more about this I think Bianca or Courtney talk about it together on a podcast somewhere.
Drag race and RuPaul's allowance towards all these things has gradually changed thanks to awesome queens being on the show and fans wanting better for queens, but the effects of that viewpoint on the show are still really strong. So it's fun to Camden work against these ideas on S14.
To me, Camden's big standout moment is as Freddie Mercury on the runway and the "One Way or Another" lip sync. Camden's usual drag, as much as she goes towards any aesthetic, is very femme, Spice Girls-sexy. I don't find it particularly compelling, and I don't feel that she's adding much femininity or sexuality as compared to her character on drag race out of drag.
Freddie Mercury is different. Camden plays Freddie on the runway and in the lip sync very sexually. It is unequivocally a performance of powerful queer male sexuality. We really have not seen that on drag race before, especially on the runway. What's even better is how much fun Camden is having with it. You can really see the joy as she performs. She's having fun and feels more powerful in this queer male drag than her usual femme drag- and that in itself is incredibly empowering.
(Camden feeling more powerful in male drag works for the same reason that "Joey Jay is gay" does. Joey says as much in her lyrics, but there's a truth to it that goes beyond that. Like Camden, Joey is gay and femme enough already out of drag that her drag transformation might actually reveal more masculine or dominant aspects or her personality. If for a typical queen, drag goes something like "he's so gay she's straight," for Joey it goes "he's so gay she's masc.")
The same is true of Camden's other standout performances during the season. In the Lalaparuza, she has to lip sync against Bosco, the sexiest queen of the season, while not dressed in her super femme-presenting drag. As Camden puts it "how am I supposed to lip sync to this super soulful song dressed as Sonic the Hedgehog's bitch girlfriend?" But she makes the choice to perform the song sexually in spite of that, and she does it really well, to the point that the show has other contestants comment on it. See: Daya "I'm so hot for Camden right now." For Camden that feels like another really emotionally strong moment.
The last piece of this narrative is Camden's performance in Moulin Ru as the androgynous cabaret host. Although the character's dress and physical presentation is androgynous, Camden brings a queer masculine-coded sexuality to her performance that feels like a continuation of her discovery as Freddie Mercury. And like with Freddie, she performs the role very successfully and has a ton of fun doing it.
What's even better is just to see all these performances get rewarded by the judges on Drag Race. I really don't know how they would've been received on earlier seasons. But I'm glad we have them now, and I'm glad that queens continue to push Drag Race to expand its aesthetic bubble.
This concludes my thesis.

As someone raised Christian even going to a private christian university for undergrad I was always told that my sexual feelings were sinful. I was told that i was acting lustful because I had urges that were normal. I was even put on probation in college and almost kicked out because the school found pornographic material on my OneDrive(i saved something to it by accident). But even after apologizing profusely and trying my hardest to get “help” the urges didn’t go away. What it did do was send me down a shame spiral where I felt I wasn’t good enough and all I ever would be was this lustful sinner in the eyes of God. So I indulged more than I should’ve and that kept me running back to the church. After leaving the church I realized that that was the point. They wanted me to feel evil to my core and what better way to keep me feeling that way than to make something that is natural and affects almost every person especially teenagers sinful. So instead of me, learning about sex and porn the correct way and developing a healthier relationship with it. My brain has tied this shame to it that somehow makes it more addictive. I am aware now that porn isn’t the problem it’s my relationship with it that is. It’s been tainted by shame and guilt. And now I can’t watch it without locking myself in my house for days to not let anyone see me in my shame. I’m currently working through this issue now trying to find different methods so I can have a healthy sex life that includes masturbation. Also finding ethical porn. But God I’m upset that I have to undo all this teaching that said to not trust my body or hate my urges.
TLDR; Porn isn’t bad Shame and Guilt about it are. Trust your body and your medical professionals.

Bumping “Angeles” by Elliott Smith rn. We’re in the Los after all.
​
FBE World Tag Team Champion Capital STEEZ vs FBE Junior Heavyweight Champion Misery
Getting the block hot in the Grand Olympic Auditorium was a true Clash of the Champions, Capital STEEZ and Misery channelling their inner Ricky Steamboat vs Ric Flair as the greatest FBE World Tag Team Champion in history put on an intense fight with the woman rapidly approaching the longest reign as FBE Junior Heavyweight Champion! As seesaw of a battle as you’d ever see, King Capital and the Mis lived up to the hype and more, displaying exactly why they’ve held their respective titles for as long as they have whilst showing off that they can do just as much of a jam-up job under Pure Rules too, two Shining Light League favourites from B and D Block respectively tearing the house down. With the last such potential Semi Final preview seeing Misery’s Death to Juniors stablemate Joshua Epps pick up the win, she was determined to make that 2 for 2. Tangling with an all-time great was no easy feat, but in the end it was indeed Misery picking up her career’s biggest win yet!
Misery (8) def. Capital STEEZ (7)
​
A Block: Mr. Calcote Miller [2] vs Paddy Murphy [0]
Despite carrying the burdens of heartbreak on his back after Michael Kalamity lived up to his surname, cruelly ending the fan-favourite Sham-Rock N’ Scot Connection, a determined Paddy Murphy headed into Blitz tonight looking to complete the Journey To The Centre Of The First Win all the same to kick off a different tournament campaign the right way. Mr. Calcote Miller with the strongest standing of A Block currently, sitting on top with an uncontested 2 points, he had everything to lose here, the pressure on him immense to maintain his standing above the rest. And yet, he appeared to handle it rather well, not cracking despite the climbing temperatures. Unfortunately for him, Murphy’s been starved for too long of his moment, firing on all cylinders here to show he’s not as 2nd Rate as it may have originally been thought, producing an unstoppable performance to lead him to his first win in FBE!
Paddy Murphy [2] (10) def. Mr. Calcote Miller [2] (4)
​
C Block: Ripley [2] vs Travis Broski [0]
Since the final night of the Carnage Tour, the world’s been frothing at the mouth for a chance to see the Ripple in Time and the Undercity Underdog get in there with each other again, their tantalising draw leaving more to be wanted. Lucky for everyone, fate did its job, pairing them up here in the Shining Light League’s C Block for another certified banger no matter how you spin it. Ripley boasting the upper hand with two points to his name thus far, Travis Broski was left fighting from underneath for a chance to redeem his own first night performance, which worked perfectly in his favour, at his best in circumstances like these. That being said, he still had a mountain of a fight to summit, a landslide headed his way courtesy of The RISE member, though Travis managed to pull Ripley in its way instead to kickstart his own comeback in this tournament!
Travis Broski [2] (9) def. Ripley [2] (5)
​
PROVINCE (FBE Television Champion T.M Imran & Erick Koeman) vs The Ark (Cactus Mike & FBE World Tag Team Champion Code Blue)
With a nostalgic episode of Wide World Of Sports preceding tonight’s show, featuring The Ark man himself Code Blue, the excitement for this one was only further launched through the roof, the Pasadena Paralyser set to stand across the ring from his former PRIMETIME partner for the first time since Mayflower Mayhem 2021! At very different points in their respective careers now, T.M Imran running ship with PROVINCE, deep in his second FBE Television Championship reign, Flying Dutchman by his side, and Code Blue… running boat with The Ark, amid the greatest FBE World Tag Team Championship reign in company history, Cactus “Ark Ark Ark” Mike by his side, there wasn’t a shadow of a doubt in anyone’s mind that these lot were at their very best when they tangled under Pure Rules.
Mike soon set to challenge Imran for his title, a big focus was placed on those two as they got familiar with each other’s body of work in order to strategise effectively for the pay day, whilst incorporating sound tag team wrestling on both ends, Blue brandishing his obvious unparalleled experience, and Koeman yet again proving himself to be a valuable glue like he was back in WarGames. Whilst the champion end definitely brought it, it wasn’t to be their night, The Ark gaining the New Hardcore Legend some key momentum!
The Ark (Cactus Mike & Code Blue) (11) def. PROVINCE (T.M Imran & Erick Koeman) (4)
​
C Block: EED [0] vs Mark Steel [0]
Neither of these two men strangers to high-profile tournaments, EED involved in the crowning of the very-first FBE World Heavyweight Champion and the Shining Light League’s own predecessor, the E1 Climax, and Mark Steel a member of last year’s stacked Punish & Crush and Heyman Classic line-ups, they channelled the many lessons they’d picked up along the way here, wrestling efficiently so as to not burn themselves out yet still slamming down on their respective gas pedals enough to drive to victory. EED on the lighter schedule, he was the fresher of the two here, though found himself less conditioned to take shots the way Peak Performance was, steeling his way through the Notorious’s offence to give the OG a surprise. Nevertheless, the most accomplished man in his Block by miles, EED didn’t let it get to him, continuing to push on, though he’d have another thing coming when Mark scored one of the biggest upsets of his career, knocking off the legend to secure two points!
Mark Steel [2] def. EED [0] (NS)
​
A Block: FBE Pure Champion Dr. Logan Wright [1] vs Arslan Malik [0]
With the A Block leader stunned earlier in the night, Dr. Logan Wright was presented with the perfect opportunity to capitalise and launch himself into first place after a gruelling opening match, though Arslan Malik would not make that easy, knowing what beating the FBE Pure Champion would mean for his career, delivering in prime “Ass-Kicker” form. The Doctor got stabby like it were an XPW show, wanting to inject Malik with the right dose to knock him out for the 3-count, whilst Arslan did his best to avoid the needle and score the winning shot of his own, Malik’s blows just as sharp as Logan’s. In a war of two very different forms of sedation, it was the man with the medical license that eventually won out, the FBE Pure Champion remaining afloat as the tides rose him to 3 points and block leader!
Dr. Logan Wright [3] (12) def. Arslan Malik [0] (3)
​
Non-Title/British Rounds: FBE World Heavyweight Champion Inferno vs Joshua Epps
The long-awaited third instalment to the budding saga between Inferno and Joshua Epps came to a head right here in what’s been dubbed “The Wager in the Aether”, FBE World Heavyweight Champion and God’s Greatest Athlete out to prove who the undisputed better man is between them. A traditional 15-minutes on the clock, though split into three 5-minute rounds with a 20 second break between each, Blitz witnessed its first-ever and hopefully far from last British Rounds match in the holy grounds of Rocky Balboa vs Apollo Creed, its two competitors primed to show what pure wrestling is all about.
Epps one of the biggest success stories on Season 2 of Blitz thus far, it was clear just why with him putting on another masterclass on his end, wowing the onlooking judges with a perfect hybrid of catch wrestling and powerhouse bidness that wouldn’t look out of place at all on an episode of World of Sport 6 decades ago. Inferno answered with Marty Jones and Billy Robinson inspired techniques, paying homage to some of the men that’ve influenced his very British style of working, whilst remaining every bit of a cocky bastard as he could be in between, the Gatekeeper of Pure Rules working that mission statement to bring down any new blood that tries to size him up on his domain. Ultimately, three closely-fought, superb rounds resulted in the judges leaning their scorecards in Baba Blitz’s favour, Inferno staying on top of his home turf!
Round One: Inferno (9) def. Joshua Epps (4)
Round Two: Inferno (9) def. Joshua Epps (4)
Round Three: Inferno (8) def. Joshua Epps (5)
​
​
A Block Standings:

Place	Competitor	Points	Record
1	Dr. Logan Wright (c)	3	1-1-0
2	Paddy Murphy	2	1-0-0
2	Mr. Calcote Miller	2	1-0-1
4	Jay Castle	1	0-1-0
5	Arslan Malik	0	0-0-2

​
C Block Standings:

Place	Competitor	Points	Record
1	John LaGuardia	2	1-0-0
1	Travis Broski	2	1-0-1
1	Ripley	2	1-0-1
1	Mark Steel	2	1-0-1
5	EED	0	0-0-1

​
Three fabulous nights down, but still many more to go. Interesting results are starting to break through here in the tournament as the last of the competitors begin to assume their spots in their respective Blocks, so stay tuned for next week as we see all 20 wrestlers officially be brought into play! Until then, keep wrestling the good wrestling, and pure rules.

Was there ever a period in Israelite history characterized by a great diversity of Jewish groups and Jewish teachers using their own version of the Hebrew Bible, their own books of Moses, prophets, writings etc.? Did this phenomenon ever exist to such an extent we can actually speak of Judaisms in the precanonical period in the same way Bart Ehrman speaks of Christianities?

I've done so much bad in my life. I think that's why I'm hurting so much now. I've always been an 'atheist' but also always had a burning jealousy for religious people. I envy the relationship they have with Jesus and God. I envy them always knowing theyre loved and believing that life goes on after death. I envy the values and traditions. I just felt like I couldn't fit in. Wasn't pretty enough or loveable enough. I've only ever been abused and rejected. I don't know how to truly believe, as much as I want to. Lately, all I can think about is God and the comfort and love that people claim he has for everyone. I want to be part of it. I don't know where to start besides reading the Bible. I've done so much bad, how will I know when I've been forgiven? Or if I can? I'm worried my body is ruined from tattoos and pre marital sex and all the other things I did. I want to have a relationship with God and live my life how he wants

Like Roymus99, I currently have the XR Elite, Quest Pro, Quest 2, and HP Reverb G2 Valve Index sharing my VR space.
I got my XRE around 11am and took a half day off to enjoy being able to finally have something that can replace my ageing Index with wired PCVR 7 hours later, I can't believe how garbage this thing is. It's embarrassingly bad. (I can't discount that it sounds like about half of you doing reviews so far have had super smooth experiences. Which, to me, only serves to highlight how awful the XRE is when the experience is so wildly inconsistent among early adopters.)
Unless shit suddenly gets real simple this evening, this fucker is probably going back to HTC tomorrow. I'm so, so, so very disappointed.

1. It's been 7 hours, and I STILL haven't been able to connect it for PCVR - it can't do the ONE thing I needed it to do...replace my Valve Index. I've gone through so many iterations of stuff to try I've lost track...but right now?
   
   • Vive Streaming Hub open on the PC.
   • USB-C connected. Headset paired by QR code
   • Note: Getting that far took 2 hours to figure out. There's a frame presented in your view that you would THINK is where the QR should go just like in every other QR code-recognizing UI element in the last 10 years. Nope. Get Closer. Bigger. No. Closer than that. No, still closer! It FINALLY registered when the XRE was 7" from my monitor, filled my ENTIRE view and the QR-code framing UI element was easily a good 2' behind my monitor. The QR was reasily 2x the size of the 'framing' bracket by the time it actually recognized it.)
   • Put the XRE on, connect it to the computer that it paired to.
   • Vive Streaming Hub says "Vive Business Streaming App Not Found" in red.
   • Search in the Vive Store for 'streami' to get any and all apps for streaming. 2 show up, neither one is the Vive Business Streaming App.
   • Find the Vive Business Streaming App manually in the store. There is no INSTALL, only NOTIFY ME - so, pick that. Receive an email 2 minutes later - "Thank you for your interest in the Vive Business Streaming App".
   • At this point, I have no clue how to connect this thing to SteamVR via USB. I'm stumped.
   • "Just download and install VIVE Streaming on your PC, then connect your VIVE XR Elite. It's that simple." "The Test Results Say...That Was A Lie!"
   • I the last hour, I did finally get it to connect to SteamVR - but not using the USB cable...it defaulted to wifi and I had no say in the matter. WTH!
2. I found the hand tracking is frighteningly bad.
   
   • It randomly decides to alternate between Scroll Up And Down and Click. With terrible accuracy, at that. To the point that I'm legitimately scared to have the Store open, lest I make an accidental $20 random game purchase.
   • When it is a little bit stable, the slightest motion of my hand to click something frequently moves my 'click' off the UI element I'm trying to click. Consistently. I do not have this issue with Hand Tracking on either the Quest 2 or the Quest Pro.
   • When setting a boundary with hand tracking, I was just spinning a simple circle in my office chair in the middle of the room, holding my hand in one place, and the hand tracking lost its freaking MIND and drew a square box that extended about 20'/9m out over my driveway, 15' above the ground, then re-centered me.
   • Getting recentered meant that the Menu was now 15' away, and there's no intuitive locomotion in the Home Space with hand tracking
3. The controllers feel like supersized versions of the cheapest Amazon-Knockoff controllers you get with one of those $20 "Insert your Cellphone for the Google Cardboard Experience" HMDs.
   
   • Quest2 Controller with KiwiDesigns "extended knuckles" cover, AA battery, and silicone ring protector: 245g
   • Valve Index Knuckle Controller: 193g
   • Quest Pro Controller: 168g
   • XR Elite Controller: 145g - in addition to being 15% lighter than the next lightest controller and 41% lighter than the beefed up and protected Quest2 controller, it feels very plastic-y and hollow, and the plastic feels brittle. If you're concerned about dropping your Knuckles because you might break an internal switch - imagine being concerned about breaking the tracking ring right off your controller...
   • Fortunately the controllers are so ridiculously light (compared to the others that all feel substantial with a nice comfortable heft) that you should probably have time to reach up and kick on the pass-through then still have plenty of time to go get a drink, help your kids with their homework, wander back into the room and gently catch it with a free hand as before it reaches the ground after slowly drifting down to the floor slower than a week old helium balloon.
   • Oh, yeah. I just noticed that (unlike the Quest 2) the controllers don't even stand flat when you set them on their rings! There's an intentional round tab on one side, and they rock back and forth on it. WHYYYYyyyy?
   • Once I got SteamVR up and working (by wifi, not wired), one of the controllers was way off. 45 degrees or more. Consistently. /sigh
4. It's actually not especially comfortable.
   
   • Despite having pancake lenses and an adjustable diopter, the sweet spot is fucking TINY, so I have to crank the knob on the back down to mash my face into the gasket to have enough grip hold the damn thing in place. Like, WAY more than the other three HMDs I have. By a LOT.
   • The manual slider for IPD won't stay set at 70 like the Index or Quest Pro. It keeps getting pushed back toward center (down to about 66) and this gives me a huge headache pretty quickly.
   • The fan noise. Holy jesus fuuuck the fan noise. Know how challenging games spin up your GPU fans to turbine level? Yeah, quite a bit like that, but on your face.
   • No normal headphone jack, and I didn't see a USB to Headphone adapter in the box, so you're stuck listening to that fan noise no matter what.

It's been a very long day fighting with this stupid thing...I'm beat, and SO disappointed.

I ask this as someone only somewhat familiar with the character and Wodehouse. I was talking with my pastor about how using the question "What would Jesus do?" as a guide for living one's life is not realistic. No one can completely emulate Jesus (he being capable of miracles, literally) and that perhaps a different example would be more appropriate for people.
My pastor likes to ask himself, "What would David do?" but I suggested "What would Jeeves do?"... only half comically, because I was half serious in my suggestion. I think there are worse guidelines for how to live one's life than "What would Jeeves" do.
To my pleasant surprise, my pastor had actually read Wodehouse, and he said that Jeeves was occasionally selfish, and used as an example Jeeve's interference with Bertie getting married on more than one occasion. His claim was that Jeeves did not want the competition for the attention of someone else. I, however, was under the impression that Jeeves interferered with Bertie's potential marriages out of concern that it was not a good match, not out of personal selfishness but again, I am not very well versed about the character, so I am asking:
Was Jeeves ever selfish? In general, and in the example of him interfering with Bertie's proposed marriages?