How to feed your pokemon arceus
Pokémon Legends Arceus
2021.02.26 12:38 are_you_bready Pokémon Legends Arceus
Pokémon Legends Arceus is an Action RPG developed by Game Freak for the Nintendo Switch that released on January 28, 2022. Survey, catch, and research Pokémon in a long-gone era of Sinnoh to complete the region's first Pokédex!
2012.03.12 04:54 Pokémon Legends
This is a subreddit for Pokémon Legends: Arceus and any future titles. Feel free to discuss anything about the game and join in on the hype!!
2022.01.30 04:13 Foil-Head FuckBagin
Bagin is a filthy ripoff artist from Pokemon Legends:Arceus, and this is a place to voice your Bagin hate
2023.03.31 17:03 LocationOk1668 Domain Flipping: A Beginner's Guide to Buying and Selling Domain Names
Domain flipping is the practice of buying and selling domain names for a profit. This business model has been around for many years and has proven to be a lucrative source of income for many entrepreneurs. In this beginner's guide, we will cover everything you need to know about domain flipping, including how to get started, where to find domain names, and how to sell them for a profit.
Getting Started with Domain Flipping
The first step to becoming a successful domain flipper is to educate yourself about the industry. You should start by understanding how domain names work and what makes them valuable. Domain names are essentially the addresses of websites on the internet. They are unique identifiers that allow people to find and access websites online.
The value of a domain name is determined by several factors, including its length, its keywords, its extension, and its age. Short, keyword-rich domain names with popular extensions like .com and .net are typically the most valuable.
Finding Domain Names to Flip
Once you understand what makes a domain name valuable, the next step is to find domain names to flip. There are several ways to do this, including:
- Use a domain name generator tool to come up with ideas
- Check expired domain lists for valuable domain names that are available for purchase
- Monitor domain auctions for opportunities to buy and sell domain names
Selling Domain Names for Profit
After you have acquired a domain name, the next step is to sell it for a profit. There are several ways to do this, including:
- Listing the domain name on a domain marketplace like Sedo or Flippa
- Reaching out to potential buyers directly
- Holding onto the domain name and waiting for its value to increase
Raksmart: Your Partner in Domain Flipping
If you're interested in domain flipping, Raksmart is your partner in the business. Raksmart is a leading domain name registrar and marketplace that offers a wide selection of premium domain names for sale. With Raksmart, you can find the perfect domain name to flip and sell for a profit. Visit their website at https://www.raksmart.com
to get started today.
In conclusion, domain flipping is a profitable business model that requires patience, knowledge, and a bit of luck. By following the tips and strategies outlined in this guide, you can start buying and selling domain names for a profit. And if you need help finding the perfect domain name to flip, Raksmart is here to help.
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2023.03.31 17:03 AutoModerator [Get] The Ecom Wolf Pack – Dropshipping To Branding Course
2023.03.31 17:02 AutoModerator [Get] Dan Wardrope – The Pay Per Lead Agency Blueprint 3.0 – Download Instant Delivery
Get the course here: https://www.genkicourses.com/product/dan-wardrope-the-pay-per-lead-agency-blueprint-3-0/ [Get] Dan Wardrope – The Pay Per Lead Agency Blueprint 3.0 – Download Instant Delivery
📷 The Pay Per Lead Agency Blueprint 3.0
In Just 6 Weeks, We’ll Show You How To Grow And Scale Your Pay Per Lead Agency What You Get in The Pay Per Lead Agency Blueprint 3.0: Week 1 – Lay The Foundations and Get Started First and foremost, we’ll go over your goals for The Pay Per Lead Agency Blueprint as well as some general housekeeping. Please don’t skip the housekeeping! It includes important information about the Mastermind community as well as the weekly Q&A calls. We’ll also go over some “ground rules” for course participation. If you follow these guidelines, you should have no problems. Week 2 – Landing a Client and Know Thy Customer This week is all about selling and understanding your niche/offer. It’s time to get to know your niche and its target audience inside and out. Here are some of the topics we’ll discuss:
- Building your agency website
- LinkedIn and Facebook organic outreach
- Direct mail outreach
- Paid advertising
- Cold email
- Closing the deal and how to get paid
- Knowing your offer
- Customer Avatars and Empathy Maps
- How to gather and assess the market
Week 3 – Building Your Lead Generation Funnels This week will focus on three major topics:
- Lead delivery
Week three also delves into copywriting. As previously stated, this includes writing hooks and longer-form content such as advertorials. Here’s a complete list of the topics we’ll cover:
- Lead gen versus 1-2-1 selling
- Different ways to generate leads with Unbounce
- Spitballing and figuring out your hooks
- Building a quiz
- GTM basics and HotJar
- Our different funnels – dummy car finance campaign
- How to embed a LeadsHook quiz and pull through data to a results page
- Writing an advertorial
- Lead capture and lead distribution
- Privacy Policies, cookies and GDPR
- Unbounce tips and tricks
- Data validation
Week 4 – Paid Advertising and Getting Started It’s now time to start running ads, generating leads, and making money. In this module, we’ll cover:
- Where to start
- Facebook ads
- YouTube ads
- Twitter ads
Week 5 – Advanced Lead Generation This week will be more difficult. We’ll walk you through everything step by step so you can follow along easily. Week 6 – Growing Your Agency This is the course’s final module, and it teaches you how to scale your agency.
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2023.03.31 17:02 Unhappy-Classroom-10 Andrew Tate - Hustler's University E-commerce Course
‣ Andrew Tate's E-commerce Course is one of the best courses to learn Branding, Marketing, Learning how to start E-commerce & Starting your store.
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Contact me on Discord or Reddit https://discord.gg/bwWFCvaGva https://linkr.bio/legittrading
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2023.03.31 17:02 AutoModerator [Daily Showoff Thread] for Clips & Images of TRANSMOGS, (GG) ITEMS, CHARCATER APPERANCES, FLEXES, SKILLS & ACCOMPLISHMENTS
We all like to showoff on occasion, so in this daily reoccurring thread, you can post screenshots
of your Transmogs
, Character Appearance
, and Item Tooltips
as well as videos / clips
of your Flexes, Skills and Accomplishments
in Diablo 4. All such images and clips have to be placed in these threads here
to keep the subreddit and peoples feeds more overseeable and better readable...
... with the only exception
being images/clips that are posted with the intend to give feedback, discussing Balance or making suggestions
. Also join the -> subreddits discord <- where you can also share images of your transmogs, items and skills with others anytime.
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2023.03.31 17:02 TTVHopelessgamer574 Question about Promo card
2023.03.31 17:02 Asleep_Teacher_2817 Credit Card Skins
Hi guys, ask ko lg how was your experience with front CC skins pag ginamit niyo to do transactions in public like groceries, restos, etc. Anyone had an experience where you had to take off the sticker pa?
Nakabili na ako ng sticker for CVC for the back but do i also have to to like cover my signature or something?
Ano ma re recommend niyo na setup?
Can I have it like name ko lg present sa card and naka cover ng sticker yung account number, expiry and CVC? or what can you recommend. Your replies will be much appreciated.
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2023.03.31 17:02 luckluster4 Most mistakenly interchanged functions based on normal understanding
Personally, I think people make mistakes often in categorizing things that fall under the feeling functions.
I know Fe as "discussing" your feelings instead of expressing it, hence it's "extroverted" feeling because you let your emotions out in a form of detailed wording in coversations with others. Fi, on the other hand, is where you actually concretize what you feel as if there is a physical manifestation of your emotions. "Introverted" feeling meaning the understanding of the emotions heavily comes from the individual themselves as if they did their kinder homework enough to provide themselves clear distinctions of every emotion they could ever identify.
Would love to have your takes here, because I'm pretty much confident in the way I type myself based on my approach to everyday life. I was told I could be mistyping myself over the notion that I'm displaying Fi instead of Fe, when I can literally experience how Fi blindspot is like.
Have a great night! View Poll
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2023.03.31 17:01 kiyotaka_07 Ahemdabad social: Meetups/Food/Rants/Pgs/Life --Weekly thread
Hey all! how's it going?
Looking for friends/groups to hangouts/game partner, Event? Activity?(if it's your lucky day, a Date?)
Ask about Food/places near you/Best pizza or Oyo rooms
Any travelling advice? New to ahmedabad ask here.
Went to new place, how was it? rate here.
What's new show you are watching?
Join in conversation about how your neighbours/relatives are dumb..
Rant about your office work..
Have a Fun!!
Note: Most people are unaware of mental health issues, so if you are going through phases, having a breakdown, or simply want to share something, please DM me (I am not a therapist/psychiatrist, nor am I old enough to understand everything, but I will gladly listen:)).
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2023.03.31 17:01 AutoModerator TT's Tea Time
Tamara Tattles community loved nothing more than a good Open Forum or Family meeting! TAMARA herself may have not always felt the same - the moderation of said posts were a trial at times, even if it was an easier post to write! She did enjoy catching up with everyone though.
So, in memory of her and those conversations, what are you up to this weekend? How was your week? Anything you want to talk about that you don't think requires a dedicated post? Well, grab a cup, take a seat, and check in here!
*This will be a recurring post, every week.
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2023.03.31 17:01 invah If you are struggling with understanding and accepting transness
If you are older, or grew up in a strongly Christian or mainstream environment, transness probably came out of the woodwork for you.
I don't think younger people understand how absolutely alien these concepts were for people...unless you were into science fiction. (Shout out
to Riker foreverrrrr.)
I mean, we literally had a movie about trans women and we thought it was about drag queens. Now it's considered wrong for someone to portray a marginalized person in a movie but back then, it was extraordinarily
brave for Patrick Swayze and Wesley Snipes to do those roles
. They are the only ones who could have done it safely because they were the only ones who had the cultural powecachet to do so.
I was able to intellectually accept transness as valid without too much issue, but I wasn't able to accept it emotionally
: I didn't understand it. And to be fair, it is difficult to understand someone else's experience.
But I learned that someone who is trans is someone who often feels they don't quite fit in their bodies, they they aren't integrated. I think cis people experience this when they hit puberty: it can suddenly feel like your body is doing things at
you. You have breasts, and people react to you in a way that has nothing to do with you
exactly. Or you start having erections in public, and you might not even be aroused at all, it could literally just be the fabric of your clothes.
I also learned that someone who is trans is someone who recognizes strongly their gender is not in line with their biological sex. I know many cis people struggle with something similar: they don't feel that they are 'enough' their gender in line with their biological sex. They don't feel feminine enough or masculine enough. (redpillwomen
is, I'm convinced, filled with cis gender women who don't feel 'feminine' enough and so they are trying to access their femininity through a specific relationship model and dynamic.) I did wonder about the science/legal/categorization piece of transness.
But then I remembered that people legally adopt children and create families that are not biological. That we as a society recognize that as a social good and valid
. Parents with children by adoption are no less parents and their children no less their children. Now, are there dumbasses that manage to muck things up? Yes.
So I have certainly seen the cringe-fest, emotionally abusive video of the mother getting their 'trans' child recognized in church for their transness. Narcissists gonna narcissist. (I have no idea if that child was actually
trans but I suspect it didn't really matter to that mother.) Are there some specific issues that we are still working out?
Yes. But those are just 'growing pains' as we 'expand the circle of justice' to include those who have not before been included.
Hopefully this makes sense (and isn't hurtful to anyone).
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2023.03.31 17:01 Secure-Tension-6465 Smh
2023.03.31 17:01 AutoModerator Artist Face-off
How it works: Follow @ _citrus.k on Instagram and DM a link of your latest song release. A vote will be held for people to choose their favourite song, and a winner will be chosen!
The winner will receive free promo on this subreddit and on Instagram!
Make sure to submit in the next 48 hours to be considered. Join our mailing list to make sure you never miss events like this (Click here
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2023.03.31 17:01 AutoModerator Weekly Post - Fitness Friday
How have things been going this week? Any successes? Any failures? This thread is the place to talk about it. And if you're interested in joining the larger workout group, this will start December 1st and continue for a thirty day period. We'll then start a longer Workout Group on January 1st.
This is a great way to get started and learn the basics of fitness!
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2023.03.31 17:01 Monthemod MUST READ: HOW TO HIRE A WRITER AND AVOID GETTING SCAMMED!
READ BELOW TO AVOID GETTING SCAMMED AND FINDING QUALITY FREELANCERS!
1.Use PayPal and select “Goods and Services” to send payments
Use PayPal to pay your freelancer, and select the payment to be for “Goods and services” when sending. Sending it as a Good/Service guarantees a refund incase you get scammed! Sending it as a “Friends/family/gift” offers ZERO protection!
- Pay in milestones
If you need a 4 page research project done for $60. Instead of paying the $60 upfront, ask your writer if you can pay $20 for the first 33% of the project. Once they send you the first 33%, deposit them another $20 for part 2. Repeat until you get to the last stage! This method benefits both freelancers and clients.
- Never reveal ANY personal information
Never reveal your name, birthday, social security, home address, phone number, school or any piece of info that can leave you vulnerable.
- Interview and ask writers questions and request samples before hiring
Ask your writer questions about their knowledge, expertise in your project, experience. Request previous samples of their work and be as thorough when making your selection. As the client, you have the right to due diligence.
- Make sure the model projects you pay for are NOT plagiarized
Copy parts of your project and paste it into google to see if any matching text pops up on any websites. This is one way of checking your project has been originally written. Make sure citations are properly added.
- Use the projects you receive as research guides/models, instead of turning it in as your own work
By purchasing projects and utilizing them as research guides for your own assignments, you benefit in a myriad of ways. Such as having the information/subject manner organized for you to study. As well as having a rough idea on how to start your own project and formatting/building off of the content that's already presented.
It's up to you at the end of the day how you use your purchased projects. But utilizing them in this way is 100% more likely to improve your understanding of the discussion point!
RED FLAGS TO WATCH OUT FOR
- Writers messaging you with broken English, bad punctuation, typo’s, etc.
- Writers asking you to send payments as “Gifts” instead of services.
- Writers asking for more funds without providing the completed work. Or changing the price mid-way (except if you’ve asked for additional writing). - Writers requesting payments through Western Union or Cryptocurrency. As these forms of payments are irreversible/virtually untraceable. - Writers copy and pasting/plagiarizing work
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2023.03.31 17:01 Niquann473 Career Mode Ideas That The Community Will Love
These are some feature, improvement and general idea we will love to see in My player, manager and create a Club career mode. (reuploaded from EA Answer HQ )
- Realist transfers, there is something in the game that makes big club sell top young stars to mid-term team, in one of my save Leverkusen had gravenberch, Ansu fati and rodrygo and Vardy and Immobile always end up at City or Real Madrid and it’s just unrealistic to see. It makes big clubs drop positions within 3 to 4 seasons. And when playing my career where I started at league 2 and worked my way up and players in the same league don't want to move cause the league is not competitive enough. Signing should take some days before you can use them.
- Cutscenes; Locker room cutscenes before, during and after a game can add more life to save, cutscenes when the manager now signs and is getting introduced to the staff and players, more signing of players and sell of players, ending of career cutscene for players and managers, more matchday cutscenes
- Co-op career mode Just let us play a career mode with all our friends in the same league managing different teams. It exists in FM, so the scheduling issues are obviously workable. It exists in Madden so clearly, it’s not an EA thing. IMO would be the single biggest change to Career Mode in FIFA history and shake up the mode so much.
- Create a club; Add sponsor on the kits even if it just EA SPORTS, Make GK kit customizable not only color, edit physical appearances on players, edit board objectives every start of the season or every 2 or 3 seasons in.
- Cosmetics: Is it possible that we can have all past and present football boots, and balls?
- Stats: these should not be reset every season and should be added to a total, can be view when scouting someone to see how they perform in the last season
- Potential system: I understand when someone get old, they lose attribute but if I have a 30-year-old striker scoring 25+ goal in LaLiga he should not be going down -4, and it goes for young players also, have a work around so when a young star ST have 30 games and 5 goal, he goes down in over by -2 at the season end
- Sponsor, Where the club receives money per game for completing objectives. Same as with the board objective the sponsor has their own and if we complete it, we get a boost in moral and funds, Like in previous FIFA
- UEFA FFP; Limit the number of wages a club has to spend based on the income generated as a form of control with the new introduction of sponsors and funds request. If A club doesn't follow, give them a penalty such as a fine or a transfer ban for 2 or 3 transfer windows.
- Request funds: This is an option that can be enable at the start of a new career, they request an amount and in return have to complete an objective failure to complete said objective can result in starting with a lower transfer budget, getting sack
- Coaching staff: In addition to adding a development plan on a player you can have the ability to hire and fire a coaching staff team. Have say 6 coaching staff slots? Multiple different types of coaches, varying from GK coach to FW coaches and maybe even have Special coaches like a Set-piece coach and a Fitness coach. For example, 5⭐ goalkeeper coach might max out the growth arrow to GK Reflex and have a chance to pass down 'Saves with Feet' trait to your keepers who don't have the trait. Whereas a 1⭐-goalkeeper coach would lower GK Kicking, give a slight increase to GK Positioning and have a chance to pass down a negative trait such as 'Cautious with Crosses' or 'Injury Prone' trait. (Reddit user u/Lurker-dono)
- Arrange Friendlies; You can arrange friendlies and testimonials for charity or honoring a player who are retiring. (This can be a sponsor objective)
- Trophy Cabinet: This is where you can view a team’s lifetime trophy, your managers lifetime trophy (real or created) and individual players trophy counts, The pro club’s trophy cabinet is a good start.
- Stadium Customization: Where you can custom and upgrade non authentic stadium in the game and with is include new features like custom banner, tifo, pyrotechnics, these are already in FUT and you can transfer it to career mode, with this manager could allocate parts of their budget to improving facilities such as stands (which will affect the fan capacity), this adds variety to stadiums
- Kits & Crest; We should be able to add the sponsor to them and be able to customize the GK kits, or make a more interactive kit designer, the crests that are currently in the game is boring transferring those from volta or give us a crest designer; or modify existing one (shape, color, object)
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2023.03.31 17:01 normancrane The Rattle & The Hum
[Begin translation source I]
There was be one magic trick I used to pull. Good one trick it was too, ha, yeah. Made em all clap mighty. This trick could be done only at the golden hour. Do you rember that boy? Ha, yeah, I was be lifting my hands into the air and touching be the sun with tips of my fingurtips, ha, yeah, and pulling out a coin from behind, and all em clapping and laughing, rember that boy? Rember you be clapping and laughing too?
He lay there on the hospital bed, emaciated, words rolling slowly off his heavy tongue, punctuated intermittently by the harshness of cleared throats and swallowed phlegm, as I held one of his rough, bony workingman's hands, a hand much like my own, like holding my own hand in that sterile odorless room, observing him for what the past numberless days had felt each time like the last, observing him as a man and as my father and as my fellow countryman, with tears rolling down my cheeks, thinking, when was the last time I cried? Thinking, don't leave me you bastardfuck. Not fucking yet.
Was be a good trick, wasn't it?
Yeah, I said, recalling all the times he'd reached toward the sun and through sleight of hand extracted a single gold coin from behind it, recalling laughing, recalling his smile and his embrace, true and powerful, as if he were hugging me with the force of two, his own and of the mother I never knew, recalling the texture, smell and weight of those perfect coins which as a boy I never could wait to go into the city to spend. On some trifle. Some semblance of luxury. Yes, it was a good trick, I said, mindful of the clock on the wall and the relentless, silent movement of its hands. In one direction always.
Midnight had come and gone and I had to be at the docks by dawn. A shiver ran through me and I felt a longing for my wife, who at this late hour is mending clothes for our daughters, who are asleep in a single bed because we've no space for another, and in the flickering candlelight, sole illumination for the needle piercing threadbare cloth, I feel the regret of a life amounting to but a child's handful of failed dreams slipping insignificantly, like grains of sand, like grains of salt, between my thick fingers, burying the ruins of the once great illusion that I am destined, that any of us are destined, even as perfumed in silken robes my boss sluices warm brandy down his throat, which is like my throat, but whose soft hands are unlike my hands, unlike the hands of my father, which twitch, and I am imagining the taste of brandy when my father said, What if, ha, yeah. What if it wasn't be a trick, huh boy?
[Several lines here temporarily omitted. Reason: Transcription failure. Note: Attempt with updated identification model once completed.]
The Thames flows golden.
Unloading we. Dying embers of the yester- become kindling for the new day, as the ships come and ships go, into the illuminous space formed by the sky and the sky-reflected, timeless and deep, upon the canvas of whose pale brilliance we all are rendered featureless and black, silhouetted, man, woman and ship alike.
Gulls cut across the brightening sky.
Having shut my eyes, I rub my swollen face and spit blood into the river.
[Note: Provisional placement of marked lines. Reason: Chronological dilemma. Does one prefer faithfulness to original writing or to events described? Note: Consultation may be advised.]
What do you mean, I asked.
But if I expected some reaction from him, some change from the pallid staticity of his dying, none came. His dull eyes kept their blank upward vigil. He merely cleared his throat and said, Wasn't be any trick about it, ha, yeah. The pull be real. I wasn't be having no coin in hiding ken? The pull be real boy. Ha, yeah. The coins be existing there always behind the sun. So many coins. I shouldn't be touching, but the way em clapped, the way you laughed boy. The way you laughed.
He swallowed phlegm. Letting go of his hand, I rose. What are you saying?
I wasn't be knowing any trick but I could be doing this one thing, ha, yeah. I could pull ken? I was be lifting my hands into the air—
I grabbed him by the collar and shook him. The coins, you mean they're really there?
Behind the sun, he said. The pull be real, he said, as I shook him and shook him and he offered no resistance. There wasn't any strength left in him at all. He was light as non-existence. How many? I demanded, still crying, Tell me! How many coins are there behind the sun!
More than all, he said. Ha, yeah.
Why didn't you—Why did we live like we did? If you could've pulled money from the fucking sky, why did you—We were so goddamn poor! We didn't have anything. I don't have anything, I sobbed, and thinking of my wife and daughters lifted his fragile body and drove him back into the hospital bed, trying to push him through it. Blank-eyed he cleared his throat, gargled and sucked down phlegm.
Rattle, he said. Rattle boy. Rattle and hum, and for a moment I thought I saw something fill his eyes. Something golden. something flowing forever. and reflected in the Thames I saw a long ago memory of the two of us on the banks watching the merchant ships. it was, i remembered, the day after i’d been caught spraying graffiti on the school walls. the city skyline shadowlike. there be two sounds only in the world boy, i heard him say in the memory or in the hospital room or in my own pulsing head, the rattle and the hum, highlit by the pink setting sun, this be your education boy. this be wisdom ken? that, he said, pointing at the shadow buildings, be not your world. hollowed rattlescum. hear boy? hear the rattle? but i didn't, and every night i dreamed about living in the city with all its luxuries, with everything modern and easy, and do you hear that? he asked, listening. listen be under the rattle. listen be to the sun. the hum, ha, yeah, that be the real life, the hard life. the sun, the hum, ahem, I let him go, backed away, terrified I might have killed him.
[End translation source I]
[Begin translation source II]
But no, he still clung to life, coughing and wheezing even when I left the room, the hospital, too furious to go home, too awake to sleep. I looked for another kind of familiar instead, down by the dockyards where I knew I could find the pain I needed. To give and to receive. I went into a bar, downed drinks and insulted some out of town scabbie just to get into it with him, and that felt good. The anger. The scabbie didn’t have a chance, not because I was good at brawling but because what I wanted was for him to hit me. Hurt me. Heads I win, tails me too. Punch after punch. He beat the snot out of me, broke my nose. I beat what was left of my father’s life out of him, cracked a few ribs, all while telling myself my father was out of his mind with dying man's delirium to be talking about coins behind the sun. But that wasn’t even what had pissed me off. It wasn’t that I believed him. It was that he believed himself, and still thought he’d done right by keeping us poor when all he had to do was pull fucking coins from the fucking sun until we had everything we’d ever dreamed of!
What finally put the scabbie down was a chair to the face.
I slinked out of the bar sore to moonlight uncomfortably louder than it had any right to be, then swung at the moon too. I missed. It wasn’t until the next day, after a shift on the docks on no sleep and too much Adderall, that I found out my father had died.
Crawling home I was sure my wife was going to kill me, but she didn’t. Bless her heart and curse mine. Instead she wrapped her arms around me, kissed my cheeks and offered her condolences. Then she pulled me to the bathroom before the girls noticed I was home, and I washed the blood and sweat and stink off myself so that I'd be more presentable when they inevitably decided to snuggle with me. As presentable as anyone could be with a cracked nose and puffed out face turning all the bruised colours of the rainbow. Predictable as clockwork, I broke down.
[End translation source II]
[Note: Inferring existence here of unlocated paragraphs presumed lost.]
[Begin translation source III]
[Note: Uncertain temporal relationship between preceding and following paragraphs. Estimation: 2-4 years. Note: Estimate open to revision.]
I haven’t been writing much lately. I’ve spent more of my free time reading my old notebooks and journals. Truthfully I’m ashamed of much of what I wrote before, yet there’s something that prevents me from destroying it: it’s a reflection of who I was at the time, what I was. I want to remember that. I don’t want to forget myself. Reading, I feel again the stress I was under, the drugs I was taking, the thoughts I started and never finished.
I miss my father.
I took the girls to a movie tonight. It wasn’t very good, but we had a lot of fun. They’re getting older. They’re starting to lie to us.
I injured my arm on the docks. Two days off, then pain meds and back to work.
My wife and I celebrated our tenth anniversary by going out to dinner. We walked past the hospital where my father died. It was early evening and I couldn’t help glancing up at the sun in the sky. (In the air, as my father would have said.)
My boss died yesterday. It was unexpected. He was 61. Unmarried, no kids. For five minutes the entire docks stopped and stood in silence, then the whistle blew and we went back to work. There are articles about him in all the newspapers, some of which he owned. His funeral is scheduled for Saturday and they say it’s going to be one of the largest ever. There was almost no one at my father’s funeral, just the few living people who knew him.
I’ve been feeling increasingly indifferent to things I used to care about.
Midlife crisis: check.
I keep listening to music from my youth. I do it on headphones because it's fucking shameful. Sometimes I feel so much nostalgia it hurts. What exactly am I trying to find? I grew up poor. I'm still poor. I'll die poor. My life is stillborn. It never really started.
I stayed out all night again doing nothing. Haunting the city, I guess. I take the bus in then walk. I told my wife I was drinking, looking for drugs. She believed me but didn't have the decency to get fucking mad. She's just concerned. Not just saying the words but actually meaning them. I was looking for a fight and all I got was empathy. How much of a loser am I, right? My kids tell me they love me every day and I spend my days feeling like absolute shit. Maybe it's because I pretend all the time that I don't believe in the sincerity of others.
I bought some spray paint today. Recapturing lost youth, but at least it's artistic!
There's so much noise in the world.
One of my daughters is sick. Not caught-a-cold sick. Running tests to figure out the damage sick, and: planning to buy meds we can't afford on my salary sick, and: being on a waitlist for a procedure for seven fucking years (!) sick.
Walking tonight I kept thinking about my old boss' funeral. So many interviews and TV specials and it's like no one rembers (*) him anymore. At the same time, his daughter wouldn't be dying because her dad was too much of a terrified fuckup to get anywhere in life.
[Note: Link to Soho Stone? Plan: Attempt precision dating. Outcome: Plausibility passed. Note: Begin formal write-up of hypothesis to present at Symposium. Note: Inform Norq and query opinion .]
Went out to the city tonight and did my first spray job in twenty years. Felt good despite the hands being rusty. Nothing major, just a quick poem I'd written a few weeks ago, but then I crossed it out anyway and wrote something else. Something true. Something sincere. You know what was good about the whole thing? (Other than not getting caught, because how embarrassing would that be.) It's not me anymore. I'm no graffiti artist. After I was done and the adrenaline had gone down, all I wanted was to be home again.
The Universal Archivist Pix disconnected from the central mainframe and telecommunicated to the Universal Archivist Norq. The two Universal Archivists were good colleagues, despite that Norq had achieved greater scholarship-fame than Pix because his research activities concerned a planet exponentially more interesting and universally significant than Earth.
"Good eon, Norq" said Pix.
"Good eon, Pix," replied Norq. "Do you possess useful information to submit?"
"I possess it," said Pix.
"Please make submission," said Norq.
"I submit I have developed a plausible hypothesis about the identity of the creator of the Soho Stone," said Pix.
"The Soho Stone," said Norq, referencing briefly the central mainframe. "One of the few surviving physical artifacts from the obscure planet you have determined to study. Who do you hypothesize is the creator?"
"He is unnamed," said Pix, for the digital files he was studying never identified their writer.
"The currently stated creator of the Soho Stone is Unknown," said Norq. "Is it your intention to appear before the Symposium to make rational argument in favour of amending the creator to Unnamed?"
"That is my intention," said Pix.
"Do you not believe such a change is quite minor?" asked Norq.
"Not all archival revision must be radical," said Pix. "In addition, I believe that names are not always of primary significance. The information I have gathered, collated and transcribed provides great insight into an individual Earthling and by linking such insight to the Soho Stone I believe I will add much scholarship-value to the Archive's exhibit."
"I support your submissions. They are well founded," said Norq.
"Thank you," said Pix.
"Goodbye, Pix" said Norq.
"Goodbye, Norq," said Pix and ended the telecommunication. After reconnecting to the central mainframe, he navigated to the entry on the Soho Stone. It read:
Origin: Earth (dead), c. 17th-22nd century A.D. (local time). Description: Fragment of presumed larger structure composed of limestone and clay being overlayed with the following symbols:
the only gold is the setting sun
all else amounts to none
coins clatter in a purse
as the rich man with distinction passes by
decomposing in the rattling hearse
[The above is obscured by a large X and several irregular lines, below which the symbols continue:]
i fucking love my wife and daughters
[The above is underlined.]
Significance: One of three surviving physical artifacts from its planet of origin. Creator: Unknown.
Although Pix had long ago memorized the entire central mainframe entry about the Soho Stone, he still enjoyed viewing its submissions. It kept his scholarly spirits up. He turned now to the only remaining information in his research he was sure succeeded the entry which he hypothesized described the creation of the Soho Stone.
I got home so late last night it was early. I thought everyone would be asleep, but my wife and daughters were all up. They were sitting in the living room together and hadn't noticed me come in. The sun was just beginning to rise, filling the room with a gorgeous light, and they were talking, all three of them, whispering: about what I don't know and it didn't matter. The words didn't matter. These words don't matter. Because what I heard then, I'll never forget. It was a sound. Pure, simple, and beautiful. It was the hum.
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2023.03.31 17:00 RedCastoff [I Became a Commander, Whatever that Means] - Chapter 17
Next Chapter 17 - In a Small Clearing There Lived a Mouse Last Time:
Having left Eightside, Laran, Leor, and Aiden began to make their way towards Tripit. Aiden took the opportunity to learn more about his companions, at least partially to distract himself from the less desirable aspects of traveling long distances by foot. Eventually, the three of them come across a strange sight - a chimeric creature drinking in the middle of the road. The creature seemed to desire the group to follow it, so they did. That is how they found Oriwyn, a hunter of spirits who had been paralyzed by her quarry for an entire night and who had sent her companion - the creature Brams, who she referred to as a winged badat - to go find help. Leor was able to remove the paralysis from Oriwyn, who then promptly requested to be added to the group. Seeing no reason to deny her request, Aiden accepted. Before she could completely join them on their travels though, Oriwyn asked to go back home to her mother.
Oriwyn was true to her word. Unless asked a direct question, she stayed quiet for a full twenty minutes. By the end of the time I think Leor felt kind of bad for being so snippy with her, as she immediately tried to strike up a conversation with the eccentric goblin with the oddly-shaped ears.
“So, Oriwyn, why did you just ask to join us without really hearing anything about us? We could be brigands or some other unsavory sort.”
Oriwyn grinned at the dwarf broadly.
“Call me Ori if you want! It’s easier to say! And I joined you because you seemed like good people - are you brigands?”
I watched the interaction with interest. If I was going to be the Commander of this particular outfit, I figured I should take an active interest in how people’s personalities worked together or clashed. Leor could be crabby and sarcastic, and so far Oriwyn seemed like sunshine personified in all ways except her occasionally grim turns of phrase. It was definitely a mix that felt like it could create problems. For the moment though, Leor just gave off a snorting laugh at Ori’s question.
“No, we aren’t brigands. But we could have been!”
Ori smiled sweetly. “Oh, I doubt it. Brams is an excellent judge of character!” Leor’s eyes squinted and I figured she was looking for any hint of sarcasm in our new companion’s answer. To be fair, I was too. For his part, Brams just walked ahead of all of us. He had a bald tail - it reminded me of a rat’s - which he swung around jauntily. At the sound of his name being mentioned he turned back over his shoulder and gave a small grunt. Regardless, both Leor and I came to the conclusion that Oriwyn implicitly trusted Brams’ judgment. I wondered if he was some form of animal companion, which would make Ori some form of Ranger if Earth class tropes still held. I felt like it was a safe bet she was the Wheel of the Shaded Forest at least, given her location and generally nature themed powers. My contemplation reminded me we actually didn’t know much about Oriwyn’s abilities, so I decided to ask about that. I waited for Leor and Ori to finish up whatever they had been discussing while I zoned out.
“Hey Ori, I was wondering what sort of things you could do in a fight. We have a lot of time to talk in fights, but I feel like it’ll be helpful to know before we get into one.”
Oriwyn nearly vibrated in excitement. “Yes! Dad always said that knowing who was at your back was ninety percent of surviving. Let’s see now… Is there any sort of stuff you particularly want to know?”
I thought for a moment. So far, it seemed like Roles were the best indicator of abilities, so I thought I’d start there. Distractedly, I also figured I should scry her to see what that could tell me. Oriwyn Hawthorne, Level Seven (Shaded Forest)
I sighed - heaven forbid it be too easy for me to get any information in this world. Out of curiosity, I also scried Leor. I hadn’t done so during the fight with Stabby and Shooty, and had been too distracted with preparations to do so since. Leor Whisper, Level Five (Great Secret)
That was somewhat confusing. Leor had said she was an Augur. Laran had told me he was a geomancer, and when he’d been in my party I could see him marked as such, but despite the same information from Leor she was unmarked. I decided to check to make sure I could still see his Role. Laran Agana, Level Four (Geomancer)
I reflected that things were weird again, though in the end they probably weren’t any weirder than what I normally dealt with. I debated a few ways to go about trying to figure out what was going on with Leor and Oriwyn and eventually just settled on honesty. My head snapped back to the present moment - Oriwyn had asked me what sort of information I wanted, and I figured I should actually answer.
“If you know it, I’d love to know your role. I’m a Commander - I’ll explain what that is as we walk - and Laran here is a Geomancer. Leor’s an Augur, though I’m admittedly having trouble identifying her at the moment - I’ve got a thing that lets me see information about people, but it just says she is in the Wheel of the Great Secret. For what it’s worth, it seems like you’re in the Wheel of the Shaded Forest.”
Oriwyn looked like she was trying to sponge the knowledge up. She must have held her father’s advice in high esteem, as she seemed to be trying to follow it enthusiastically. As she spoke, she sounded proud.
“Oh, my role? I’m a Ranger like my dad was - or, kind of like he was. He had a hawk named Red, while I’ve got Brams here. Also he was a lot better of a fighter than I was.” Internally, I noted the use of the past tense. Whoever her father had been, it seemed like he was unlikely to be around anymore. I tried not to think about what had gotten him killed - Ori had said her father was an adventurer. Regardless of what had happened to him - or, I wondered, because of what had happened to him - she had sounded very sincerely interested in joining us. Ori continued talking.
“I’ve not really fought a lot of things before, so you’ll need to give me some pointers.” This surprised me. She was level seven - a full two levels ahead of Leor, who was the next highest leveled. As I’d walked around Eightside, I had gotten the sense that most people were between levels one and five. I wondered if Oriwyn was holding something back. After all, we had found her trying to hunt down a spirit. Maybe her father had gotten her started and her own interests had pushed her further? Come to think of it, I didn’t understand how leveling up worked exactly - it would likely be a good idea to try and get us all to roughly the same level range before we got into the thick of things too badly. Oriwyn still had more to say too.
“I’m also a herbalist - Mom taught me. You’ll get to meet her soon! Her name’s Aspen, and she’s not going to like what I have to say. She’ll be grateful you came to get me though, so you’ve got that going for you. Also, I’m not sure I ever said thank you. If I didn’t, thank you! Everything was starting to hurt pretty badly and I’m sure the fact I got soaked in rainwater would have caused problems eventually.”
The speed at which Oriwyn talked had slowed a little. Her words definitely always felt like they were fighting each other to escape from her mouth, but there was more control now than there seemed to have been when she was first awakened. I wondered if she had just been really happy to be rescued? It was definitely possible. Leor seemed to be slightly warming to her, or at least she wasn’t actively trying to hide from Oriwyn anymore. I wondered about that too - had Leor just been overwhelmed? Was she actually annoyed, or was it more like it was just too much for her to deal with? I had noticed she moved quickly to help Oriwyn once the cause of her condition had been made clearer - I figured that could either be because she wanted to trade for Oriwyn’s silence, or because she had felt pity for the goblin with the strange ears. I shook my head - when one’s team was living, breathing people as opposed to digital ones and zeros, handling emotions suddenly became more important. I resolved to bring that up with Laran at some point - I didn’t think he would know much more than me about handling different personalities, but it would feel good to have someone else to rely on instead of trying to take it all on myself.
Conversation continued for a bit as we walked, but eventually we all got too tired to keep talking. I could tell that Oriwyn was very fatigued, as I could see her ears drooping and she would have absent-mindedly collided with a tree had Brams not interposed himself between her and the obstacle and gently redirected her. Laran was mostly fine, as was I - I really must have gotten a stamina upgrade coming to Tal, since the me from Earth would be feeling horrible with how much hiking I’d done in the past few days - but Leor looked rather tired. She had taken a lightning bolt to the gut and burped it out over the trees, so I guess that made sense.
Uncle Iroh made it look so easy though. Maybe the others would find it funny that my thoroughly non-magical world had stories like that.
Finally, we found a game trail. It wasn’t broad, and I didn’t think a cart could make it down the path, but it was clear ground and that meant we didn’t need to plow through low-lying branches and dense foliage to make forward progress. As we moved forward, Oriwyn began to walk a little taller. I could hear her taking deep breaths and wondered what was going through her mind.
“Mom’s house is about ten minutes away. I’ll announce our presence. She’ll probably yell at me a bit for being beat up, but it’s fine. Also, we’ll probably duck away from the rest of you to discuss… things. It’ll be fine, I’ll convince her that it’s a good idea to go with you all!”
This time, I could hear through Oriwyn’s positivity. There was an undercurrent of unease and worry which permeated her words. I spoke up, trying to give her an out.
“You know, Oriwyn, I’m flattered you want to join us, but if it’s going to be a problem you don’t have to. I don’t want to cause trouble with your mother…” As I trailed off, Oriwyn turned back to me and smiled. This smile was tinged with something I couldn’t quite recognize, but which I could partially describe as wistful.
“It’s okay, really. Mom will be sad, and she’ll try and talk me out of it, but this is what I want. She’s not been happy that I’ve kept training like Dad taught me to when I was young, but she hasn’t stopped me. I’m doing this for Dad’s memory, for us as a family, and for myself. I just need to tell her that.”
Oriwyn smiled again, a little sad and a little determined but still very excited to go, and I believed her. She was putting a lot of faith in us - and, though she probably didn’t know it, a lot of faith in me in particular - and I would see that her faith was well-founded.
As we rounded a corner in the road, we came into sight of a clearing. Oriwyn’s face immediately brightened up. The clearing was large and absolutely overgrown with low-lying plants. Small purple flowers grew on clustered stems, reminding me of lavender. Vines wound over and around lattices of wood. Bees buzzed everywhere in the warm spring air, and instantly I felt a sense of calm come over me.
In this ocean of flowers and herbs and life, it felt like nothing could touch us. Time itself seemed to flow around this place, as if it could never be anything other than what it was right now. Overhead, a hawk circled and craned its head down at the clearing - it must be hunting where there was no tree cover. Oriwyn looked up at the hawk and waved to it before taking a deep breath, setting her face, and walking on towards the house.
“Mom, I’m back! I have some companions!”
From behind a wooden door in the stone cabin, a beastkin emerged. She wasn’t very tall and had broad, near-circular ears coming prominently out of her head. I suddenly understood the descriptor of someone having “mousey brown hair” for the first time - something about the color of the hair that flowed around her ears indicated her mouse-like nature. She wore clothes dyed in bright, solid colors with a green belt. All in all, she looked almost exactly what I would have expected a herbalist to look like. It was nearly dark from the time it had taken us to find Ori and walk to her house, so she waited until we were quite close to greet us.
As we stepped into the light that was thrown from the interior of the house, I saw the mouse beastkin - Aspen - tense. I took a look at Oriwyn and was surprised to see how rough she looked. Maybe she had simply looked better earlier because we were comparing her to when she had been paralyzed, but now the large cuts seemed very obvious, as well as the various stains from rain and tree-sap and blood which colored her clothing. Still, Aspen didn’t say anything and nodded to us all cordially.
“Welcome to our house travelers, and unless I am much mistaken, thank you for saving my daughter from her… enthusiasm getting the better of her.”
There was a look passed between Oriwyn and Aspen which lasted a few seconds. I could see the opening salvos of an argument begin, could almost hear the worried protests of the mother and the confident, placating reassurances from the daughter. Eventually, with a sigh, Aspen broke the eye contact and turned to the rest of us.
“How about you come in and rest your weary legs? I know we are far from the road, and I would not have you stand and tire yourselves further if you’ve already come a long way.”
I thanked Aspen, as did Leor and Laran. I was surprised how comfortable it felt to sit down, how much my feet hurt as soon as I thought about it. Oriwyn had instantly scurried off to fetch a few chairs, which we all sank down into gratefully. With that done, Aspen simply motioned for her to sit at the table next to her. With a sigh, she did. Aspen pulled out a large mortar and pestle and began to collect herbs from the walls. Bundles were hung up everywhere, presumably to dry, and they infused the air with a floral, heavy smell which weighed on my eyelids heavily. Satisfied with what she had gathered, Aspen poured a small amount of oil into the mortar, added several of the gathered herbs, and began to mix them. Her posture radiated tension and concern and a slightly uneasy silence fell across the room. She cleared her throat.
“So, Ori, what happened to you?”
I could see Ori wince. I got the impression it wasn’t because of whatever her mother was putting on her wounds.
“So don’t get mad, but there was a lightning spirit, and-”
“Ori!” her mother nearly shouted. There was a look in her eyes and she let her hand drop. “You know better than that! Spirits are dangerous things! If your father was around, he would have-”
“He would have hunted the spirit just like I did, before it got into a town and hurt someone.”
There was silence. I feared to make any noise, and I figured Laran and Leor felt the same. Voices weren’t raised to the point of yelling, but it was clear that the emotions going on between mother and daughter were strong. After a second, Aspen raised her hands back to Oriwyn’s wounds and continued to work on them.
“Your father would have gotten a group together to help him.” There was sadness in Aspen’s voice. Oriwyn nodded along, agreeing with her mother.
“Yes, he would have, but there wasn’t a group of people to gather. That’s why I want to go with Aiden, Laran, and Leor here. They’re a party of adventurers, and they’re looking for more people to join them.”
Aspen’s face went through several emotions in rapid manner. Oriwyn simply held her hands out towards her mother, who took both of them. She leaned forward and rested her head on her mother’s shoulder.
“Please, Mom. I can feel this is right.”
Aspen looked extremely conflicted. She looked over at us, and I could feel the evaluating weight of her gaze. I wanted more than anything to avoid the intensity coming from her eyes, but I steeled myself and met it instead. Aspen slowly shook her head. Looking at her daughter, she spoke in a strained tone of voice.
“Oriwyn, you can’t just… Fine, we’ll talk about it.” She looked back over at the rest of us.
“Could you give us some time to speak? We don’t have lodging in the house for this many, but feel free to set up tents in the clearing. I didn’t see any of the rain-teller plants folded up, so it should be a dry night. Should you need food, please let me know, but for the moment I beg you pardon my breach of hospitality and give me some privacy to speak with my daughter.”
I instantly agreed and got to my feet despite my protesting legs. Leor and Laran swiftly followed - I don’t think any of us could have imagined ignoring her request. As we left, Leor caught Oriwyn’s eye. She nodded once, sharply, and Oriwyn nodded back. We closed the door behind us, and left the family to discuss whatever it was they needed to.
We set up camp quickly and made our own food. None of us felt like intruding in whatever was going on to ask for a meal. The night was pleasant with a slight wind which washed away the remaining mugginess from the previous night’s rain. We sat out and looked at the stars for a bit, occasionally conversing quietly.
“I wonder what happened to her father,” I mused out loud. Laran and Leor just nodded, but none of us speculated past that. It wouldn’t have felt right. Silence stretched out, and I glanced towards the house. There was still light visible from the windows, but we couldn’t hear anything nor see either Oriwyn or her mother. With a sigh, Leor spoke up.
“Well, I think she’s brave.”
I was surprised and raised an eyebrow questioningly at Leor. She just shrugged and went back to staring in the fire while Laran looked thoughtful. I didn’t press, and she didn’t offer any explanation, so the topic died. Shortly thereafter, Leor was the first to go to her tent. When she was gone, I sat next to Laran.
“So, what are you thinking?”
Laran was silent for a bit longer. He had taken his shoes off and had buried his toes into the ground. I had noticed him doing some of the techniques he used when he meditated. When he had found his answer, he looked at me and smiled.
“I had never thought that we would be dealing with so many… emotions. For the whole adventuring party thing that is. I thought it’d be only adventure an’ fighting an’ the like. Not this.”
I nodded silently and leaned against him. He leaned back, and thus we sat supporting each other under the moonlight. Soon I was nearly nodding off, and I excused myself to go back to my tent. Laran nodded and squeezed my hand as I left.
I don’t remember falling asleep, but I do remember waking up the next morning. The day had dawned a little chilly, though it felt bracing instead of cold. The scents of pollen and flowers hung in the air, and I could almost swear that the sun shone in rays through the golden dust that the plants produced.
There was not much fanfare when Oriwyn came out of the house. She had a pack on and a huge grin on her face. Brams was with her, of course, and he also seemed eager to go. Aspen followed her out and came to talk to me.
“Aiden, from what Oriwyn said yesterday you’re the leader of this group. It isn’t my position to restrict my daughter from going anywhere or doing what she pleases but…” Aspen’s voice dropped to a croak and she fell silent, blinking violently and clearing her throat. Her eyes were puffy, likely the result of having cried the night before. “...but please keep her safe. She’s the only family I have left.” Tears ran down Aspen’s face silently as she looked up at me.
“I’ll try, I promise you I will try with all my might.” A thrill of panic shot through me as I was speaking - I was putting us all in possible danger just by adopting the lifestyle of an adventuring party, and I feared the day that I would need to deal with the consequences of that - but my resolve was firm. I was the Commander. I would keep everyone safe.
Aspen’s smile was watery but seemed genuine.
“That’s all you can ask of anyone. Drenza would have loved to have met you - I’m sure he could have told you a story or two about what it’s like to be an adventurer!”
I looked at the rest of my party. Laran was finishing up packing a tent while Leor had nearly instantly gone to talk with Oriwyn. We would be fine. We would work as a team. We would win when we needed to fight.
It was this thought that hardened my resolve. I needed to find a way for all of us to train. Laran, Leor, and I said our goodbyes to Aspen, and Oriwyn hugged her tight for a full thirty seconds. They exchanged words, but none of us listened to them. After that, Oriwyn turned to us, wiper a tear from her eyes, re-affixed her grin to her face, and began to confidently stride away from her home. Elsewhere:
Daisy was wearing a yellow dress which was scandalously low cut. Despite the formal clothes that everyone else wore, she still wore her large, chunky boots. They looked horrid in combination with the dress, and made a lot of noise besides. The boots clomped on the dancefloor like the falling blows of a hammer, and with every footfall her dance partner flinched. He was a very tall human with salt and pepper gray hair and a thin mustache that moved nervously on his lip. As they spun in a stately waltz, Daisy spoke. “Dahling, you look so nahvous - why don’t you relax an’ just ahnjoy the musahc?” Daisy’s partner blanched. He hated it when she did that stupid accent - it meant she was feeling mischievous. As mayor of the city, he should be carting Daisy off to the stockades for all she had done, but here she was at the Duke’s birthday party. Her own goons were serving drinks, and the worst part of it all was that this was normal. This was the twelfth time he had ended up as Daisy’s dance partner, and he had no illusion that she was doing it by accident. Everything from her fake accent to her ridiculous dress to her impeccable dancing conveyed one thing to the beleaguered mayor: “You may be the mayor of the city, but this is my town.” First Previous
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2023.03.31 17:00 louisedub After my [38 F] husband [38 M] of 3 years got fired, he's been short-tempered and mean, and I'm tired of it
I'm not sure how to resolve/improve my marriage, following my (38 F) husband's job loss (38 M). We've been married 3 years, together for 5. Before, he was a thoughtful, caring husband with some anxiety. Last year, we welcomed our first child (10 months). A month after I gave birth, husband was fired from a job he'd held for 10 years. It shocked him and made him angry. Since then, he's been grouchy, irritable, mean. He mostly takes it out on me. He picks a fight and attacks me for the smallest things.
Husband has been out of work for 9 months now.
With his bad moods, I've tried to be supportive and kind and give him grace because I feel bad that he got fired. He's not like this all the time, and the frequency of his eruptions has gone down over the past few months. However, I also have boundaries, and I do not appreciate him belittling or yelling at me. So I told him this. On multiple occasions, but also yesterday.
For example, he asked me to buy him a dresser. So, I ordered a dresser and supervised the delivery. The delivery guys accidentally broke a dresser leg. They were honest, apologized, and noted that on the form and submitted a repair request. I told them I understood accidents happen and looked forward to the repair. When I told my husband, he yelled at me on and off for 3 days. He thought I should've been meanemore aggressive to them. He told me to call my credit card company and tell them it was a fraudulent charge. I told him I couldn't because that would be lying--I did buy the dresser. He went off. (So you're refusing to fix this?! What is your problem?!) He yelled at me and spent the next 3 weeks sending the store nasty emails.
Before that, I asked him to handle getting the crib ready. I had already purchased it, it was ready for pick-up at the store, and I just needed him to handle getting it and assembling. Honestly, I thought he might enjoyed this dad-rite-of-passage. He hired a handyman with a truck to pick-up and assemble. That worked fine. But afterwards, my husband complained that he had to spend his time meeting the handyman, and that from now on he wasn't going to meet any handymen/delivery people/etc. He said, "meeting contractors is bad for my mental health." And, just because I'm unemployed, doesn't mean I have time for this stuff. I said, Okay. And now I take time off work to meet all repairmen/etc. (hence the dresser delivery in the last paragraph!)
Meanwhile, I had to go back to work full-time 6 weeks after having baby girl. I take care of her throughout the night when she wakes, I watch her from 6/7 am when she wakes - 9 am, and 5pm-8pm, and on weekends. The nanny watches her from 9-5pm. Husband pitches in about 3 hours a day on Saturday and Sunday. (But did not watch her at all for the first 6 months). I work really hard to be a good mom and be good at my job and keep this family happy and healthy. It's like instead of living with a nice husband that I appreciate and can rely on, I have this grouchy porcupine that I have to watch out for. It's exhausting for me to try to manage his moods on top of everything else. I feel like I'm shouldering too much.
Husband has been going to therapy, but IDK if it's helping. Or maybe I'm just impatient for it to work faster? I've suggested couples therapy, but he's not interested in that. I also suggested that if he got a new job, one he's happier in, he might feel better. He did not appreciate that advice. I think he's in a rut.
Yesterday, we had a big fight. I woke up upon hearing the baby, greeted her, and started playing sweetly with Baby Girl. Everything was lovely. Until husband woke up. He immediately started attacking me for scheduling a happy hour after work since he wanted us to go to dinner at his parents' house that night. But I had texted him the day before and asked if he could watch the baby so I could go to this HH, and he said Yes. Also, I scheduled the HH in the first place b/c husband asked me to. He thinks one of my former colleagues could have some job leads for him. I offered to meet my husband for dinner after my HH or cancel the HH, but he said I never should've scheduled it in the first place. He continued to belittle me. He said I obviously didn't know how to work a calendar, I didn't like his parents, I couldn't be trusted (none of these are true).
I'd had enough. I told my husband, You are being a ____ (bad word). You didn't used to be like this. But you've been like this ever since you lost your job. You are grumpy, rude. You yell at me. You pick fights over nothing. You're not reasonable, and it's too much for me to deal with. This is not what I signed up for. Stop it. You need to either make yourself happy, or figure out a way to be kind while you're unhappy. If you want me to go to couples therapy with you, I will. But you need to fix your behavior. He told me I was name-calling and that I was the rude one. Now we're not talking. I think he believes he did nothing wrong and is waiting for me to apologize. I want him to take what I said seriously and change his behavior.
Any ideas on how to repair the marriage? I'm at a loss.
tl;dr: Husband got fired 9 months ago, and since then he's grumpy, rude and picks fights. I empathize, but I need him to be nice to me (and others).
submitted by louisedub
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2023.03.31 17:00 CheeseWarden Can't get a refill, what do I do?
I'm finishing my first pen (four .25 doses and two .5 doses) and now there's no stock at my pharmacy. What should I do? Can you miss a week and go back to your regular dose? I don't know how long it will take to get my new pen.
submitted by CheeseWarden
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2023.03.31 17:00 Stargirl_dani Is he the asshole?
Context:My mom and stepdad have been together for 8 years when she meet my stepdad he lived in a shit house with one dog and was the nicest person ever not 8 years later he has a home with 4 dogs.
Keep in mind I don’t like him. Last weekend my stepdad was listening to the Tv very loud so my mom told him to turn it down he told her to shut the fuck up and go away 45 minutes later they got into a fight and he is talking about how he cant express himself but my cousin can (he’s nonbinary) I feel as yes u can express yourself but listening to the Tv at 97 isn’t expressing yourself it’s being full of yourself and think your the only person in the house. And when he wants something he needs it know and no buts. But when I want something it has to wait. He get mad at me for getting b’s but u never finished high school your a drop out you can’t be talking. He calls be a brat but starts every problem in the house he yell at me for eating 3 pancakes I feel like I don’t belong there but all my mom does nothing but agree. He hates my dad for no reason and I love my dad and I stay at his house more is because I like it there because my dad loves me. I want to know if my stepdad is an asshole or is it just me?
submitted by Stargirl_dani
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