Baby sitter jobs

Throwaway for obvious reasons.
I hate being a mom. I never wanted kids, I was thriving in my career, traveling the world and getting paid for it. I had so many options and possibilities for my life. I loved my life and I never felt like a child was missing from it.
Fast forward: I met a guy at work. He was my dream guy and everything I ever could have wanted. He didn’t want kids either (so I thought). Well, long story short (even on birth control) I ended up pregnant and while I was crying and freaking out, he was over the moon (almost as if it was intended or planned). I thought about ending the pregnancy but he was so excited to be a dad and I couldn’t bear to lose him so I figured as long as I had this amazing man as my kids dad I’d be okay and we’d figure it out. WRONG. This was 11 months into our relationship (we were best friends about 2 years leading up to dating)…we ended up married a couple weeks later…another thing I never really wanted to do or at least not rush into but my grandpa was a pastor and told us we had to “do the right thing”.
My mindset on kids changed during my pregnancy, I was happy and my marriage was for the most part amazing. Once our child was born, my husband was the most amazing father and I was a pretty good mother I think. I suffered really bad from PPD and constantly thought about unaliving myself and my baby but I got help and things got better. And my husband picked up the slack ten fold. He was honestly the perfect dad and gave me everything I needed to focus on getting better.
My husband was gone a lot for work again after our son turned 1 and I was stuck being a full time single, working mom. I was moved to a position in the company that didn’t require me to travel anymore, a desk job, and I hated it. My husband was off seeing the world and I was playing house by myself. As you can imagine the marriage fell apart after a couple years of this and he stopped being a good father. For about a year he stopped showing up completely. My child started acting out more (entering the terrible twos and threes) and I kept telling myself “it’s just a phase, it’ll get better.” Well…it didn’t and I’m f***ing miserable.
I ended up losing my job all together because I was a single mom and struggling mentally with the divorce and being the only caregiver for a child I never wanted. I went back to school, my sons father now sees him again more, I started a new career (that I kinda hate) and the more time I have to spend with my kid, the more I resent him. He’s annoying, he cries constantly, I don’t have the patience. I want him to live with his dad full time but his dad still travels for work and can’t take him. I feel like a horrible parent, I know I’m not a good one, I can see that. I wasn’t cut out for this shit. All these men guilt child free women into motherhood and then leave them completely responsible for a kid they don’t want. This kid destroyed my relationship, my career, my life and I’m supposed to act like I’m happy about it. It wasn’t his fault and I know that, I made the choice to keep him…and I regret it. He’s a good kid for the most part and obviously I love him more than anything. I just don’t particularly like him. I don’t know what to do anymore, but I’m all he has. His dad is physically around but since the divorce, he’s a shell of his former self and doesn’t act like the father he was. He doesn’t really do anything with our son, just sticks him on the couch with a tablet and occasionally talks to him.
One day my son is my best friend and little sidekick but the next 5 days he’s screaming and crying constantly and I’m shutting down. I don’t know how to break out of this and be a good mom. My kid deserves at least one half decent parent. He’s set up for life, he’ll be able to go to any university of his choosing, have nice things, and good experiences. But that’s not parenting. I want to be a good mom, I tell myself every morning “today we will do better” but 5 minutes in he does some dumb shit and I start yelling again. I’m so angry all the time and I want to stop it. I want to enjoy my kid. I’ve started therapy, gotten on medication, tried gentle parenting and he just cries all the time and blatantly ignores me. It’s like nothing works and I just end up in bed all day wishing he would leave me alone or counting down the minutes until his dad picks him up and I get to be free.

A senior picture was posted to a sub I’m on, something a lot of us in the US probably did. Mine was taken behind my high school by a friend who was a crip. Why? My mom said we didn’t have money for that. Both sisters, when we had the same financial status, got pro pictures. I need my ACT scores? That sheet is in a bag off in a corner that my moms forgotten about. My sister needs those same scores? Neatly filed away where mom can find them in 30 seconds.
Something new has cropped up in the family, my youngest sister is pregnant. She’s 26, has a good job, her boyfriend/father of the baby is sticking around, she has her own place. There’s literally 0 reason for someone to be saying she shouldn’t be having a kid at this point in her life. I personally have no complaints.
My issue with having no complaints is my mom does. She was competitive when having kids. My youngest aunt is 12 years younger than everyone else (rainbow baby after 6 miscarriages) so she was out of the running but my other aunt was in. My aunt was intentionally pregnant via IVF twice so my youngest sister and myself have cousins the same age give or take. My mom was and still is pissed and the oldest of us is 32. She convinced my sister for a bit I’d do that, despite me being openly disinterested in children since I was 12. I feel like she’s ruining more than normal

I started a new job last week, after a little over a year at my previous job. I just had to leave there it was making me so sad. And the pay for being management was not worth the stress and anxiety it was producing. In accepting this new job I was not thinking about how my wife and are excepting. I just saw that the pay was better and the insurance was better but I didn’t think about how I would need leave sooner than later, we are due at the end of July. So the problem is the job is for a local school district and my schedule follows the students schedule although our baby will be here in July she will be here towards the end of the month closer to when school starts again. The other wrench is that I’m on my probation period for a year. So my main question would be what are my chances of having a job after my daughter is born?

First time mom to a 4 month baby boy. Ever since he was born, we’ve been dealing with boundary stomping and overbearing tendencies from my MIL. Baby boy is her first grandchild and she is VERY excited, but the excitement comes across very intensely and she has a tendency to make everything about her and her experience as a first time grandma, rather than about us having our first child. Examples of her behavior over the past four months include:
-wanting to hold him constantly when she’s around him; not wanting to give him back when he fusses or is hungry; telling me “he’s fine!!” when I suggest he needs to nurse -saying things like “I want to quit my job and become his full time caretaker” or “I’m making a bedroom for him in our house so he can stay over all the time!” -saying “I wish he had brown eyes like me” (baby has blue eyes like both his father and me) -holds her hands out whenever she wants to hold him. My husband has been pushing back on this, saying things like “I’m holding him right now, I’ve got him” and she will push back, to which he responds “I’m his dad” and she says “well I’m his grandma!!” -calling my husband a baby hog when this happens; saying he hovers over baby too much -calls him “my boy,” “my baby” etc -doesn’t listen to us when we tell her what he needs (ex: if he’s fussing and we say he needs a nap or wants his paci, she’ll dismiss us and say he’s fine) -we see them probably once every other week, but she found out my mom has been coming over to help out with baby (my mom is much more lowkey and very respectful of our boundaries). MIL said she wants to plan a dedicated day throughout the week where she can come over and help. We don’t need the help. We have childcare already (baby goes to a daycare center right next to our house). She says she wants to do this so she “can be part of baby’s life” - he’s barely four months old!!!
I’m very conflict-avoidant and am a huge people pleaser, so I struggle with establishing boundaries and knowing whether my feelings are valid or not. I know she’s just very excited to be a grandma, but it’s like she’s trying to re-live her glory days as a mom and doesn’t respect our authority as parents. DH is going to have a very direct conversation with her (he’s talked with her multiple times about it but I don’t think he’s been direct enough in the past). I just keep wavering back and forth worrying I’m being too hard on her, but she makes me feel very uncomfortable and my protective momma bear instincts come out in full force whenever we are around her. It feels like she’s trying to claim stake over my baby. Am I overreacting?

LO is 8 months old and a strong sitter, very nearly crawling. At 9 months, we will be going to an indoor water park to visit family for the weekend.
Someone suggested bringing a baby bath seat so LO can play in the water. What are some other things you’ve tried?

First time mom to a 4 month baby boy. Ever since he was born, we’ve been dealing with boundary stomping and overbearing tendencies from my MIL. Baby boy is her first grandchild and she is VERY excited, but the excitement comes across very intensely and she has a tendency to make everything about her and her experience as a first time grandma, rather than about us having our first child. Examples of her behavior over the past four months include:
-wanting to hold him constantly when she’s around him; not wanting to give him back when he fusses or is hungry; telling me “he’s fine!!” when I suggest he needs to nurse -saying things like “I want to quit my job and become his full time caretaker” or “I’m making a bedroom for him in our house so he can stay over all the time!” -saying “I wish he had brown eyes like me” (baby has blue eyes like both his father and me) -holds her hands out whenever she wants to hold him. My husband has been pushing back on this, saying things like “I’m holding him right now, I’ve got him” and she will push back, to which he responds “I’m his dad” and she says “well I’m his grandma!!” -calling my husband a baby hog when this happens; saying he hovers over baby too much -calls him “my boy,” “my baby” etc -doesn’t listen to us when we tell her what he needs (ex: if he’s fussing and we say he needs a nap or wants his paci, she’ll dismiss us and say he’s fine) -we see them probably once every other week, but she found out my mom has been coming over to help out with baby (my mom is much more lowkey and very respectful of our boundaries). MIL said she wants to plan a dedicated day throughout the week where she can come over and help. We don’t need the help. We have childcare already (baby goes to a daycare center right next to our house). She says she wants to do this so she “can be part of baby’s life” - he’s barely four months old!!!
I’m very conflict-avoidant and am a huge people pleaser, so I struggle with boundaries and knowing whether my feelings are valid or not. I know she’s just very excited to be a grandma, but it’s like she’s trying to re-live her glory days as a mom and doesn’t respect our authority as parents. DH is going to have a very direct conversation with her (he’s talked with her multiple times about it but I don’t think he’s been direct enough in the past). I just keep wavering back and forth worrying I’m being too hard on her, but she makes me feel very uncomfortable and my protective momma bear instincts come out in full force whenever we are around her. It feels like she’s trying to claim stake over my baby. Am I overreacting?

I was pretty much offered a preschool teacher position, and I have always wanted a lead teacher position since I was only ever an assistant. However, my mom suggested that since my baby is only 5 months old, I should stay home and be with her. I would be for the most part, though, as this position is only part-time.
The state that I live in is almost impossible to get a lead teacher job because it requires either a CDA and or an associates or bachelors degree. The state that my husband and I are going to move to in a few years has much more relaxed qualifications, though (sometimes even just a high school diploma!)
I don't have any of that just yet (ADHD is a biatch when you're young and enrolled in college), but my mom said she would help me fund a small business since my husband works and it would be best for me to stay home with my baby.
I'm in such a dilemma. I would love to do either one, but I know this would be the only chance to become a lead teacher in a long time, and it's only part-time anyway... (If it helps, it would be at a military preschool).

MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING
I regret having my son. That's the first time I've ever admitted that, even to myself. I can't tell anyone, because they will think I don't love my kid. I love him, but I think I would've been better off without him. I got pregnant when I was freshly 19 and working in the porn industry. I had been wanting to leave the industry but couldn't find a way out. I was also raised very religious so, while I am pro choice, having my family scream and cry to me when they found out I was pregnant and leaning towards abortion made the decision a lot more difficult. I was also sent to a crisis pregnancy center that gave me false information which swayed my decision. All of this created a perfect storm that ultimately led to me not terminating the pregnancy. My boyfriend was in his mid twenties and became abusive during the pregnancy (emotionally and sexually at first and it escalated to physical after my son was born.) I was already severely mentally ill and pretty heavily medicated and couldn't take the medication during my pregnancy so I suffered from extreme paranoia and auditory hallucinations that were exacerbated by the hormone shift. I was drugged without my consent during labor (fentanyl), and some things happened at the hands of the doctors and nurses that left me traumatized. It didn't matter how much I cried or said no to things, they treated me like livestock. I was told it would all be worth it when my son was in my arms. When I first held him I felt nothing. I chalked it up to the drugs they gave me, but didn't feel anything towards him until eight months later. He was colicky, so I was a single teen mom living alone with a colicky infant. I had to get a minimum wage job, because I couldn't find anything else that wasn't in the sex industry. I became severely underweight because I couldn't afford to feed the both of us and people would assume I was a drug addict or anorexic and an incompetent parent. He's never slept through the night. Last night I got 1.5 hours of sleep. He is also a brat. People say it's just because he's a baby but I don't care. Its exhausting to be around someone that just takes all the time and won't even look at you when you get home from work or screms when you take him away from a dangerous piece of furniture that could tip over. My grades at school are tanking. I have wanted to be admitted to a hospital due to my depression worsening after the baby, but I couldn't bear the judgement I would receive from my family. I already receive so much just for moving back in with them at 20. (my sister still lives with them at 22, but I was thrown out at sixteen bc my mental health got to be too much for them so I guess it's different). And despite all that, despite everything I've gone through, people still mistake me for the babysitter. People ask my mom how it feels to be raising another child in front of me. (she keeps him while I'm at work and normally takes him from me when we are at church and takes him to family events that I am not invited to so people see him with her more). People ridicule me for putting on weight since moving back in with my mom. I love my son but I am fucking exhausted. I hate how no one knows me for anything except a mom now. I hate how people want my my to bring my son to visit them but don't invite me. I hate how my family posts photos of my son and crops me out of them. I hate how I have lost my body and individuality. I hate my life.

Sorry English is my third language. First of all I want to say, I'm not a doormat, I will never let outsiders (non-family members) mistreat me in any way, it just when it comes to "family" members I tend to be lenient on them.
Both me and my husband we same age (38), married 11 years already. In my Chinese culture, if their son has an University Master degree in Chemical Engineering, you better make sure your daughter in-law also has a same education level and background. Also, after married have children is a must, and must have "son", it is important to have a son to carry on the family name, especially if your husband is the ONLY son (he has an older sister, but he the only son). You get the gist of how my culture is.
My husband never rely on his family, his first jobs/first paychecks was when he was 13 years old in Middle school in 8th grade and he work since. When he was 18 he left home went to University live on his own. In his adulthood he work in Petroleum-chemical process plant making 130K a year take home (after tax), he debt-free and very responsible with money. It 'Him' that bought a house for his mother to live in free so she not have to worry about rent. So No, he never see why he needs his family permission on who he married.
My husband meet me, court me, married me, he said he doesn't need anyone permission in who he choose for a wife. Let put it this way, his maternal aunt (his mom sister) basically just does not like me, she just never think I was good enough for him.
His aunts, she said: I have nothing to offer him, I only have a High school diploma (uneducated), I'm plain looking, not younger age than him, couldn't bear him a son. She also said: He needs to find another wife, why don't he use his US dollars, and U.S. citizenship to go to China, Vietnam, Russia, etc... there alot of poor girls but young pretty girls there would married him for his USD and U.S. citizenship, so they can come to US for better life. And most important, the young girl can bear him a son, give him children.
His aunts, she even went as far as during holidays get together, she show him pictures of her friend's daughter whom single, young daughter of her friends whom she wants to matchmaker her with him, hope he would divorce me and go for this younger girl (yes, while knowing he married, his aunts dislike me that much). ..... He was mad, he slam his fist down the dinner table loud, and yelled "THAT'S ENOUGH'". He stood up and grabbed my hand very tight and demand his aunts apologize to me, and he said while point his finger too: this will be the last time he sit in the same table that has this woman (Yes, he address his aunts as "this woman"). He said: She is no longer his aunts. And who she thinks she is to disrespect his wife (me) like that, even his mother doesn't get to have a say in his marriage. He took me left and slam the door on his way out.
And that was the last time, he does exactly what he said, many years has passed and he still never speak to his aunts again, or even called her aunt, he still address her as "this woman". He still will not go to any family gathering that has her. Basically he still hold grudge against her, he said her comments and what she did was very disrespectful (the she show him her friend's daughter pics and tried to matchmaker him).
Yes, I try to mend him and his aunts relationship, you know let it go, it been a long time passed, why hold grudge? And every time is he said to me: I'm married to him, not married to his aunt or his family, so let HIM deal with his aunts "his" ways.
Every time is he also said to me: I need to understand, he wants me and ONLY me, if he can't have me he rather have no one, it all (me) or nothing (no one else), he doesn't want substitute, substitute is not a word in his dictionary. And about kids, unless I'm the baby's mother, he rather not have any kids, so drop the old fashion thinking of son must carry on family name. He said if I love him, then accept him as who he is, grow old with him. Let him deal with his aunts.
Was my husband overreacting with his aunts?
He ALWAYS like this, he hella intense, dominant, and protective of me, insanely black and white thinking, all or nothing, make it or break it, no grey in between. Like he say, me and only me, he never want substitute nor is substitute is a word to him. He loves intensely too, the way he cares for me in our 11 years married. And NEVER once in the 13 years together I saw him bother bat an eye look at another girl. And he sure can hold grudge for a life time too (like his aunts case). It not just only this, the way he loves me, and the ways his eyes looks at me after all these years, his all or nothing in love.
His personality aside, is my husband overreacting with his aunts, and too protective of me?

New to this thread, feeling down today, wondering Why everyone gets a partner, everyone gets a co parent, everyone has someone to pick up the kids because your running late, not us, we do it all. I have been a single mom for going on 8 years, my daughter is going through her teen years and on top of working two jobs and a dog it’s alot. I love my life and my babies but the thought of just never having help makes me really sad. I want to applaud all of us who do it this is no easy feat and we are enough!

I have an 11 year old. She lives with me and hates her dad. If I kill myself, that’s probably where she will go. And I know suicide hurts the children. I don’t want to hurt her.
But dammit, I’m just so tired of living. I’m fucking tired of it. I have had more than my fair share of abuse and rapes by men my whole life. Last week I was happier than I have been in my whole life. I had the man of my dreams, he was everything I always wanted, he loved me so much and treated me like gold. I was pregnant with his child.
Until I found out he was cheating. Like, in an extremely cruel and shocking way. Fucking-insanely deceptive. Then he said he never loved me, then he said he did love me, and wanted to fix things. Then he said he never said that. Then I aborted the baby. And I am bipolar with ptsd (men trama) and severe abandonment issues. And pregnancy hormones. I called him out on Facebook. With my proof, venting for three days and opening up about everything I was feeling and my pain. He works with me. 30 minutes before my shift yesterday, I was fired for having feelings. His betrayal caused more pain than I’ve ever experienced. And it didn’t stop there. There was more shocks, more betrayals, more lies, then offers to cuddle together, then an abortion, and now my well paying job.
I have tried so hard. I had abusive parents, abusive relationships, ducking gang raped at 15 by grown men who drugged my drink when I ran away…i built myself up. I had a great job, financially secure, a man who loved me and treated me like gold that I was going to marry, I finally had it! And in less than a week, it’s all gone! I don’t want to try anymore. I have to pull myself out of another hole, alone, with a daughter. I don’t want to hurt my daughter, I really don’t, but I just do not want to be strong anymore. God, would I really be that terrible if I kill myself? Can’t I just be allowed this?

So I had a friend around my age (early 30's), I'll call him Charlie, that recently passed away. Were me and Charlie best friends? Not at all. But he was a person who was everyone's friend. He was from my neighborhood and we grew up together. There are a lot of people in my neighborhood that passed away young over the years, between covid and just general violence. But Charlie had such a great impact on the entire community. He was the "help old ladies bring their groceries home" type of person, and that's unfortunately very rare from young men in my area. Just seeing on social media a few days ago that he passed was devastating. We don't know the details except that it was some kind of freak accident. My brother called me from another state to share the news with me and we both shared memories of Charlie and practically cried on the phone together.
My husband on the other hand, can be a bit heartless. He met Charlie through me as I met my Husband when we were teens. He did actually seem sad when he heard about Charlie's death, but we spoke about it briefly, and that was that. Don't get me wrong, I can be the same way sometimes. I've had family members who passed away and I didn't shed a tear nor attend the funeral because I didn't care for them as people or they were just voluntarily going down the wrong path in life that lead to their death. But Charlie's death actually touched my heart in a different way. So yesterday I heard about Charlie's funeral arrangements. I came home after work and my Husband just caught a bad cold that me and my daughters are getting over. He is starting a new 2nd job today so he was a little grumpy. I happened to bring up the funeral which I may not be able to go to if I can't find a sitter and I know my husband will have to work. Before I could even finish telling him my plan he cuts me off saying "Nope, you're not going. If I can't go, you can't go." I asked him why not and he said that he shouldn't have to explain himself but just repeats that if he's not going, then I'm not going. Then it's immediately dismissed as if I was one of our kids asking to go to Disneyland.
I am utterly confused, shocked and frustrated. Our kids were in front of us so I held off until we were in the room alone. I questioned him about why he felt the way he did about me going to the funeral and he won't give me any explanation but tells me that he already said his reason is that HE cant go. He then gets very nasty and says if I want to go then GO! but now I know if I do go, he will have some type of problem with me. I'm just trying to understand why he feels this way. Charlie was more MY friend, not his. And I can see if there was some kind of safety issue, or if he was concerned about other people who would probably be there (we have had problems with someone from our neighborhood in the past, restraining order involved) but he wouldn't explain anything. Then he gets angry with me because he isn't feeling well and blamed me for making him feel worse and making this an issue. I only got defensive because of how he was talking to me. It ended with him telling me to leave the room and stop talking to him, so I walked out of the room saying I can't believe he could be so cold and morbid and not once ask me how I'm feeling about losing a childhood friend, less alone not "allowing" me to go to the funeral without him. He said something really nasty and we didn't speak for the rest of the night.
I woke up today feeling very upset and I'm ready to call the sitter to see if she can keep my kids for a couple of hours tomorrow so that I can attend the funeral, despite what my husband says. He really pissed me off and this is not the first time he has been unsupportive, dismissive and mean. I feel like I would be an AH if I went against his wishes out of spite but I he is also being very unreasonable and not even feeling the need to explain his feelings or listen to mine. So WIBTAH if I went to the funeral?

Hi all, I just went searching for a sub that i thought could maybe help me dealing with this specific problem and found you all. My dad is an alcoholic, has been my entire life (23F). In August of 2021 my mom passed away suddenly after a 2 week battle with Covid and being on a ventilator. She was always the level head in my dads life, keeping him from doing or saying anything that would really damage his life in a huge way (can’t really think of a better way to phrase it). She was the light in his otherwise dark existence giving him hope for a good future. Regardless of my fathers drinking habits we’ve always had a fairly good relationship and have been close. Shortly after my moms passing i found out i was pregnant with a baby girl. Me and my fiancé have been together for 4 years and i always thought he was well liked by my family. When i was roughly 6 months pregnant my dad is over at my house after he had been drinking for a few hours and starts falling down in my kitchen floor, then decides to start an argument with my fiancé telling him that he can’t marry me because he isn’t religious and so on and so forth. Shortly after i have a big talk with him about staying sober if he wants to stay in my life and my babies life once she gets here and he promises he will. He actually does a good job of keeping his promise until my baby is about 3 months old. He starts drinking again heavily and texting me telling me that my fiancé is a liar and that he doesn’t actually want to marry me because if he did he would’ve done it already, that he would rather me not have my daughter and not be with my fiancé than for me to have her and stay with him, just pretty much berating my fiancé and threatening to call the cops on him etc. Just drunken threats and generally angry messages. Because of this he has not seen my daughter since she was about 3 months old- she is now 7 months. I’ve tried going no contact with him, having the “you need to stop drinking, reflect on who you are…” talk so many times at this point that it’s just infuriating, but at the same time I know he’s hurting. The loss of my mom shook his entire world, he’s trying to figure out how to be alone again and he’s depressed. He’s apologized over and over and said he will change but i don’t know how i’m supposed to forgive him and just let him back in my daughter and mines life. My fiancé wants nothing to do with him and does not want him around our daughter at all ever because of this. I understand why he feels this way but i can’t help but feel incredibly sad at the thought of my daughter having nothing to do with her grandfather and how much it would/has hurt him not getting to see her. He (dad) keeps saying that if he can be around us he won’t drink and i keep telling him that he needs to stop drinking before he can be around us.
This turned into a long post and i’m sorry. If you made it this far, thank you. I don’t know what i’m hoping for, maybe just an outside point of view. If anyone wants any more info just ask, i know this is mostly a ramble.

I’m absolutely gutted. We completed and got the keys to our home yesterday. The former owner was outside when we arrived, and we exchanged polite convo before making our way into our new home. He knew we have a 4 week overlap with our tenancy at our flat so had some time to decorate etc. he made a comment “I’m sure you’ll wanna clean and decorate before moving in”
Honestly, inside was awful cat poo and urine all over the floor, where furniture has been removed can see where cats have been spraying up the wall saturating wall, raw meat (mince meat?) left in front garden for im guessing.. cats & cat food (meat) all up the walls and window in downstairs bathroom.
Removal company arrived same time as us and explained they almost refused job as how filthy it all was and they couldn’t believe they would leave property in this state. They also let us know they watched the owners dump cat poo into the garden then dig it over into the soil.
I never expected the place to be spotless but poo on the floor.
What really gets to me is he wished us luck, and mentioned cleaning up etc, while I had my 9 month baby in my arms. Who I have not been able to put down due to health hazard. We planned to clean the house ourselves but have paid for a deep clean company to come in today as it’s just too much.
I know owners are not needed to leave tidy, but I am gobsmacked at how people live and would leave the house. Not looking for advice, just a moan as I am heartbroken. The excitement of owning our first ever property for us and our children has been dampened by cat shit.

I (22F) am leaving my husband (23M) because he won’t go down on me. Obviously that’s not the whole reason but I guess it’s just the straw that broke the camel’s back.
My husband and I have been together for 6 years, married for 2. He was my first and only love. We have a beautiful 8 month old daughter together. My partner is a great father to her, and I have been trying to convince myself that that is enough for me, but it simply isn’t. I carry most of the load. My partner is lazy. He decided to renovate our house while I was pregnant as our house was old and had many aspects about it that was unsafe. I was more than happy to make do with what we had but he insisted. He gutted everything. He quit his job to do it full time, but it has been over a year now and the house is still unsafe for our crawling daughter. I do renovations myself but there is only so much I can do with a baby.
I have had multiple conversations with my husband about his laziness. Nothing changes. I’m supportive. Nothing. I yell at him. Nothing. I explain that things are unsafe for our daughter. Nothing. I stayed in a local mother and baby unit for two weeks to treat my depression. Still, nothing was done on the house.
Now, back to the going down on me thing.. It’s always been an issue of mine that he doesn’t eat me out. I compromised for years because he was a good man to me and I thought it wasn’t a big deal in the end. I refuse to give him oral if he won’t reciprocate. It doesn’t motivate him much.
I’ve had a few conversations with him about it. I tell him that it’s important to me that he just try once in a while. I shave. I buy him flavoured lube to mask the taste. He tells me he can’t. I am more than happy to compromise so I ask him if he’ll do anything else to make me finish, like more foreplay or using a toy, but no, he won’t do that either.
These conversations I’ve had with him is almost a metaphor for our entire relationship. I am happy to compromise and he will never return the favour. He will barely even have the conversation and he certainly won’t look at me while I’m talking to him. I know I’m leaving him, it’s decided. I think I definitely needed to put this in writing to know how I feel. Now I just need to figure out how to leave him🙃

I’ve been teaching for 3 years (started January 2020). I recently had a baby. Before getting pregnant unexpectedly last year, I was super burnt out and was planning to transition out of teaching. Then I decided to try a new school. This school year, my school and team has been amazing. But ever since returning from maternity leave in February, I want out. The anxiety is high, I’m exhausted, burnt out, you name it. It’s so hard to be a mom to a little baby and teach full time. I think I need something with better work life balance (we can’t afford for me to stay home right now). So I’ve been applying to different jobs, updating my resume, etc. I put in my resignation for the end of this school year. Essentially, I have the summer (paid) to find a new job. But I’m feeling super discouraged. None of the jobs that I’ve applied for or interviewed for have panned out. And I’m absolutely terrified that I’ll be jobless come end of the summer. For those who have transitioned out, how long did it take to secure a job once you started seriously looking?

I bisexual M(19) father of my 4months old son, inlove with my straight best friend M(19). it all started when we were grade 10 or 4th year highschool. My best friend and I were classmates since grade 7 and he also lives in our neighborhood, we weren't even close back then until we became grade 10 that's when we became best friends. My borring stay at home introvert life changed, I finally have someone to talk to about any topic, someone who will go out with me when I want to buy something, someone I can talk to in person day or night, we never run out of topic or happenings to tell each other, we were always so happy. He's the one who gave life in my borring highschool life.
I know it's bad influence but he's the reason I learned how to drink alcohol and having barkada(group of friends can be bad influence or good parents in the Philippines hates those kind of friends). And I don't care I'm enjoying my life so much more than my borring grade 1-9.... It was his friends birthday and he invited me to join, whilst i was there he always ask me "okay ka lang(are you okay)"? And he always checks on me to see if I'm being out of placed and even though those room is full of his friends he chooses to talk with me, he is always so concerned. And when his barkada(friends) ask me to take a shot, he told them not give me the drink because he knows I don't drink, but of course it's a teenage bday party so his friends insisted so I ended up taking the shot (It was my first time to taste alcohol)... While enjoying the party he always ask me if I'm still okay, or if I can still drink/walk. He even told me to insist not taking another shot. Then the party ends and he supports me walking home while my arms are in his shoulders, I've never felt happier.
Then months after that I've got my first Girlfriend my seatmate. We lasted for 2 months and nothing special Happened. Then 2 months after our breaking up he met my Ex's best friend and he courted her. So they got in a relationship, I didn't care back then because I didn't understand my feelings for him, I thought its just that he's a very fun best friend. He was jealous of me because I'm very close to her Girlfriend so he stop talking with me. After 3 months since their 11 months relationship ends, We came back to normal. We hang out every night or after school. It is always so much fun for me.
Summer came after the end of grade 10. A girl keeps on chatting with me, she was so persistent and also very beautiful, so I fell for her. After 3 months of chatting and ghosting. We became official she became my Girlfriend F(20). Our time together was the best we do what couples normally do, then after 8 months of unprotected pull outs, we accidentally became pregnant, though we didn't want the baby and I opened her to the topic of abortion, she got mad she was a very religious woman and I'm a very open man. Also in our country it's illegal to have an abortion, even when it's caused by rape it's still illegal. Anyways I stopped studying grade 12 and work for my family my baby. And our baby was born, I love my son so much and would give him anything in my can. He's the cutest little chubby circle faced baby ever. Now he's 4 months old and My girlfriend and I broke Up because our relationship is too toxic and the negatives outweighs the positives by 10 to 1. Most of the problems are because of her OVER RELIGIOUS parents, they don't want us to be together and wants us to mary and live on our own, which of my current job i cant afford. And I plan on marriage when I am successful where my partner and I wilk have an easy life. Anyways now that we've broken up I'm giving child support to my baby everything that my baby needs. I still get to see my baby and take care of him every week on my day off.
Whilst i was broken my best friend is always by my side comforting me, we were always together staying up till 11 in my/parents house. Having nonstop conversation and laughter. That's when I have a deep thoughts and realizations. I'm in love with him, with my best friend. After a couple months of breaking with my ex, I actually confess to him that I'm a Bisexual while drunk, now his the only person who knows about my deepest secret, And now he keeps on showing me mix signals(inconsistently showing glymps? about his feelings for me) posting about very relatable relationship topics, now I'm very confused and over thinking if he have feelings for me (because I know he is very straight). He even posted a myday where there is a picture of Alcohol shot held up in the sky saying "para sa taong minahal ko pero di pwede"("to the person that I love but cannot be../cannot be with/forbidden/"). Now should I make a part 2? That would be rated 18+ LOL
Ps. I am like an average straight guy in person on the outside. I am also on the standard of handsome in my country WOW THAT'S BOASTFUL. HAHAHAHHA. I never wear make up or anything and I dressed like a typical straight guy. So I don't know if he ever noticed.

Got the best job in my career that could possibly exist. Big money, great company, the whole thing. It’s a hotel, I’m in hospitality, they put me up in the hotel. To my very dumbass surprise, they looked at my minibar receipt and sent me packing. I got home and the wife withheld the baby from me because I had been drinking. She was screaming “I want my daddy” over and over again. So I called the cops. They told me to sober up.
Fun stuff. Day 1. Here we go.

Hello , I come from a privileged background and of-course still spend money wisely. My boyfriend on the other hand has some responsibilities. We both are students. I need advice on how to deal with money disparity in a relationship as I end up feeling horrible in such situations.
My boyfriend was supposed to get a full time in April but he chose another internship of his keener interest to a more expensive city and that had pissed me off as I was waiting for the money issues to get solved.
We split our groceries to what we eat but that was something he never liked and it started pinching me as well as I was dependent on my parents. He is into gym so he eats more to gain and I on the other hand am always trying to lose weight.
I was honestly waiting for him to get a full time , I don’t even know if it’s going to be a LDR as that is something I personally know doesn’t suit me and I’m always going to be pissed that even after having a good job and life he threw everything for an internship of his choose ( worse part they aren’t allowing him to convert full time and he is paying so much more for other expenses in the new city so he kind of is guilty but doesn’t admit )
Now we are planning to go for a trip, we are having a lot of fights. It is very difficult to get cheap trips to go to the beach in summer months. He doesn’t understand and I am not able to get anything round trip lower than 180 euros I feel like horrible. It’s my bday the next month and I told him I don’t want a gift , don’t pay for me but try to come for a trip, he is even troubling to spend 500 euros just for himself.
I’m honestly pissed as if he planned his career better we would atleast not have fights on this.
I come from a pampered house, sacrificing on gifts abd staying at even a basic place but he still doesn’t budge
I have been telling since months about this trip and we haven’t gone to one since 6 months +
Idk what to do. We do have a lot of fights on money Should I be patient and wait for him to get a full time ( uncertainty if we even stay in same city as he will go where the money takes him- but I believe he will try his best to stay in the same city or should I just breakup )
The worse part is that it is much easier for him to get a job as he has experience but he is so ambitious that he is adamant he wants this particular job. I still don’t have a full time job. I even said we will shit together but he can’t even say which city as he is super flexible
I don’t want my prime years fighting on long distance as already with the internship we have had many fights.
It’s very far fetched with all his student debt and elder sisters wedding on his head ( she is treated more like a baby even though she is 6 years elder ) when he will get a car so that we can meet often and when I will be the priority
We had discussions that we will get married one day but honestly do guys who want to marry behave like this?
I do love him but these things are bothering me Please tell me if I’m unreasonable I just need suggestions
Thank you