Biltmore baptist church pastor salary

For the last 2,000 years of church history from the 1st century all the way up to about the 1950's, faithful Christian women wore modest long dresses and head coverings during worship and prayer in churches. This was the standard in all denominations. Men were always at the head of the church (priest, pastor, etc).
Cultural modesty among Western Christians in particular has quickly disappeared by the turn of the 21st century in parallel to the rise of American secular entertainment media and pop culture.
Has modern secularism destroyed the humble modesty that once separated Christians from the rest of the pagan world?

For the last 2,000 years of church history from the 1st century all the way up to about the 1950's, faithful Christian women wore modest long dresses and head coverings during worship and prayer in churches. This was the standard in all denominations. Men were always at the head of the church (priest, pastor, etc).
Cultural modesty among Western Christians in particular has quickly disappeared by the turn of the 21st century in parallel to the rise of American secular entertainment media and pop culture.
Has modern secularism destroyed the humble modesty that once separated Christians from the rest of the pagan world?

I’m an ardent supporter of the branch theory. My view of the various denominations (that have apostolic succession) is that each denomination is its own diocese and has distinct regulations. Honestly, the definition I provided (courtesy Wikipedia) is what I include as part of the One, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic church. Independent Baptists, most Pentecostals, and various “mega churches” don’t fall under this. What’s your take? Please read the entire article if you want more context
“Charles Daubeny (1745-1827) formulated a branch theory in which the One, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic Church included the Anglican, Scandinavian Lutheran, Roman Catholic and Eastern Orthodox Churches;[6] to this the Oriental Orthodox Churches, Moravian Church, Church of the East, and Old Catholic Churches were also added.[1]” (taken from this article https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Branch_theory)

See chapter 1 part 1: https://www.reddit.com/exAdventist/comments/11wi81l/countryside_sabbath_fellowship_chapter_1/
WE HAVE THIS HOPE THAT BURNS WITHIN OUR HEARTS,
HOPE IN THE COMING OF THE LORD.
Curiously, we did not bother singing the second verse of the song. The second verse was about love and unity in Christ, and I should have found it telling that these ideas were not something we would sing about. After the song, we all got down on our knees for prayer. Albert prayed, wrestling with the holy spirit to bring a sermon filled with truth for these last days.
After the tithe and offering plates were passed around and the special music was sung, the sermon came. It was the traditional Seventh-day Adventist program. In fact, nothing was much different other than the sermon and the fact that we got on our knees for each prayer.
The sermon was packed with information. While at other churches, the pastor did a lot of talking, and few if any materials were displayed, this church seemed to display huge chunks of information on the screen up front. While the Bible got some air time, it was really the Spirit of Prophecy* that was front and center. There was no sugarcoating it: Ellen White was the soup du jour at this church, and the congregants lapped it up like heat-scorched desert camels. The book that Albert was most fond of was The Great Controversy, as it shed light on the coming end of the world. Chunks of her writings were displayed, with certain words and phrases being color-coded. Some words, such as apostasy, were underlined. For a good hour, we listened intently to how Ellen White saw various end times events progressing, and how we were at a very precarious part of earth’s history.
I had never been to a sermon that was so loaded with information. There was a lot to take in. The congregation of predominantly old men seemed to come alive. Unlike some of the other churches I had been in, there was not a single closed eye. Not one was asleep. Backs were erect. Eyes were intently focused on the front of the room. Every once in a while someone would let out a militant “amen.”
Albert did not leave his perch at the podium in the front. He was the kind of pastor that was like a tree. Settled in place, hands firmly wrapped around the projector remote. As he preached, he would say “friends” a lot when trying to get his point across. “Friends, do you really want to be asleep at this point in earth’s history?” “Friends, it's time to wake up, because the rest of the world is asleep.” “Friends, we need to watch, because nobody else is going to watch for you.” “Friends now is the time to pray with trembling. The end is right around the corner.”
After over an hour, tummies were rumbling. After the final prayer and closing music, basic human wants took over. It was time to eat. We all quietly and reverently made our way out of the sanctuary to either the restrooms or the kitchen and dining area. The atmosphere was a little more lively. Some would talk about the sermon while others were discussing the pamphlets and upcoming events. Others were preparing lunch and just talking about the previous week’s events. One thing that was missing was the presence of children. Other than our daughter, who was two years old, there was not a single child present. Nor were there any teenagers or anyone in their twenties. Honestly, I think that we were the youngest in the group.
A few of the congregants were related. There were two brothers and their father who were said to be regulars. I recognized one of the brothers as the man who pounded that piano into submission for the “We Have This Hope” song. He was lanky and jovial. He laughed a lot. His brother appeared more sulky and quiet. He almost appeared to be brooding. The father was sitting at the table, hunched over. He didn’t look too well. He was very stoic and almost silent.
The younger man, who we shall call Eric, was preparing a salad and cutting fresh avocado. He took his time doing it, making sure to create a culinary masterpiece that would be worthy of the Sabbath day. I could start to smell the food at this point. All sorts of scents mingled as the food was warmed up in the oven. Things were getting hot now and our stomaches were screaming for sustenance.
Every Adventist potluck is different, but you can tell a lot about a church by the food they eat. The more traditional a church is, the less you will see dairy or meat. I have only seen meat at potluck when traveling internationally. It’s not something you see a lot of in the United States. Cheese is the great equalizer. The more cheese you find at a potluck, the less sway Ellen White has over the congregation. If cheese and other dairy are absent from the potluck spread, you can rest assured that the Spirit of Prophecy is abiding.
Looking over the potluck spread, I saw that some dairy had made a happy appearance. Little signs proclaimed whether or not a plate was vegan. The more traditional members ignored the cheese as if it didn’t exist. As for me, I reached for the lasagna. It would possibly be something I would have to answer for in the final judgment—but I was hungry. Real hungry.
Being that we were guests and had a child in tow, we were allowed to go up first. To have the first pickins off the buffet table is an honor that brings with it a solemn responsibility. Behind me was a small army of hungry seniors. To fill my plate with one tantalizing dish could mean that a more seasoned soldier of the Lord behind me would lack. I had to muster my self-control and make my way forward. Tongs danced across salads and strange casseroles as I lifted the contents onto my plate. I made my way along the table, seeing a variety of concoctions that would bedazzle an outsider. Many of these dishes looked like something you would find in a cookbook that had gone out of print decades ago.
It can not be denied that much of the food was good. Some of it was bland, but given that the optimal Adventist diet shuns the use of pepper, spicy condiments, and vinegar, what can you expect? There was salt for those who desired it. I also found that strategically mixing certain foods could give them an added flavor that almost seemed exotic—maybe even sinful. Later on, I would read that much of the spice-abstaining diet ideas that Ellen White saw as optimal were gleaned from a health craze that had taken over during her time. While this craze had become obscure and disappeared from life in our modern era, some Adventist groups still follow this outdated form of healthful eating advice.
Potluck is the perfect time to get a real feel for the individual beliefs of church members. While most churches have a mix of more conservative and liberal members, observing the banter that happens during potluck is a great way to gauge the overall feel of a church. It was during the potluck time that I began to understand that there was more to this church than originally met my eye.
As I slurped up a vegetable broth, my ears were taking in all sorts of discussions that were happening from various areas of the table. I heard something about chemtrails and something about Jesuits. I had heard some discussion of Jesuits in the past but had always kind of ignored it. Being that I went to a Jesuit university, I found it somewhat relevant. I had heard my father-in-law discuss chemtrails in the past, and always thought it was a strange, and even a stupid thing to waste your time thinking about. It never made any sense to me. Yet, strangely, here it was, popping up at potluck. Talk of increased spraying and airplanes flying low over the area filled my ears.
Now was a good time to step outside and get some fresh air. It was a lovely Spring day, and nobody wants to spend their whole day in a musty old church. Therefore, I gathered my wife and daughter and we made our way outside to play on a small playground area that had been built outside. Even though there were no children at this church, the other church that still owned the building must have had children in the congregation.
As I watched my daughter play on the wooden playground, I looked up at the steeple. I thought back to our time in Eastern European Country, of this place, and the Deer Park church. I did not understand it. Yet, I didn’t see any reason to not come back and visit again. Everyone was super friendly and welcoming. That is one way they get you in.

Returning to the present tense, I have a few questions for you. Have you ever wondered why Azalia hasn't been found yet? Have you ever wondered how they came to know who all of Naason's victims were to send the council of bishops and Joram Núñez to shut them up? Or who gave the order to hide Becky, Yareth, MJ, Karina (Ana Karina), Ishah, etc. Or who gave the order to have the evidence in Naason's office burned as well as in his Bethel home, to destroy the evidence of the abuses committed by NJG? Have you ever wondered who helped put Silem García in his place as spokesperson? Or why Leonardo Baltazar, the rapist pedophile who has accusations in Chile, is still in charge of the second largest lldm church, La Bethel, after 5 years? How did Mizraim go from being an ordinary member to being a Pastor? Or why all of Azalia's family and even her husband's are “well off” in lldm?
Azalia was one of the only ones who knew each of the victims, because through her, the office was scheduled for sexual parties and dances. Susana only came to clean the remaining trash that would be left, like the maid, and to order the pizza from Pizzeria Halcón as always. And Alondra was the one Azalia sent to buy her clothes along with Dina Trejo and her daughter, both from East LA. Although Dina's daughter also spent time between GDL and Los Angeles because her husband Jaciel Alegria was Naason's all-star chef in the big house, that in fact Naason made him leave Los Angeles for Mexico when he knew he did not have legal papers and that he was not going to be able to return to the US, so that later the ungrateful Naason would send him to the rubber for someone else. You know, the typical.
Silem, Hamlet, Israel, and all those little politicians were close to Azalia because they were best friends with her husband Gadiel. Victoria García, who worked in Naason's finances, was also named by Azalia, since she was her comadre from Torreón. Leonardo Baltazar is sure to say "nobody takes me away from Bethel", because since he became Azalia's godfather when she was little, she backs him up. Azalia's sisters, María José and Leonor also enjoyed sexual blessings with Naason. And also for the same reason, María José "MJ" as they called her, also worked in finance and Leonor as human resources at Naason's home and office. Azalia's father, Javier, sent him to the labor, obviously near the province, in a church that gave a good allowance ($) and the teacher Roció was the one who reviewed and corrected Naason's studies for his apostolic presentations. And how to forget Mizraim Rangel, Azalia's only brother. The architect, author of building the sexual room or dungeon for Naason in his office, similar to the "red room" of 50 shades of grey. The one who placed the Kamasutra chair in Naason's room. Mizraim went from being a simple commoner who at 2 or 3 years as a missionary was given the Pastorate, he never had to be a deacon, and more importantly, notably he never had a career like other ministers who deserved that degree and never obtained it. After so long, Azalia is still a fugitive and probably using the money from the off shore bank accounts that Naason had in countries considered tax havens, such as Switzerland, the only one who had access to them, was her, and not even Naason's children, much less his wife enjoyed those privileges.
This is the person the authorities should be using all their resources to find. This is Naason's main accomplice who while Naason is in prison is the one who is controlling the church. This criminal pedophile must be found and brought to justice. How is it possible that there are videos of her raping minors and she is still free? How is it possible that she continues to commit crimes by obstructing justice, destroying evidence, intimidating victims, and still being free?
To all of this mentioned, nobody told me, I know.
Azalia, Azalia, where are you? We are no longer afraid of you, we are already talking and speaking about what you have done and continue to do. Sooner or later we will find you, we are already close.

When he started the criminal case against Naason and his co-defendants, I realized a curious fact. People realized who Naason really was, an evil man who abused his power to hurt millions with faith, and specifically the girls and boys of his congregation, and that seemed like a good step towards justice. But even though I saw that, there was something that didn't seem to me, they painted Alondra Ocampo as the biggest villain. They had her as a cruel person who hurt people for pleasure and who also abused her power, but she had no power. The acts he committed were under the orders of Naason, and in his time under the orders of Samuel. In the news she is painted as Naason's main assistant who brought him girls, and the truth is that she was not the main one, she was really just the housekeeper from East Los Angeles, one of the bunch, she was at an even lower level than Susana Oaxaca. Alondra sometimes didn't even address Naason directly; it was her turn to report to someone higher up than her. Alondra did not have the glory or power that people think she had, that makes me laugh, if you really believe that, then let me tell you a name:
Azalia Rangel Garcia
Those of us who grew up and lived in the Hermosa Province saw how Azalia Rangel García turned into the pimp . And make no mistake, it is not Azalia Rangel Meléndez, as some media have reported for information given to them by a person who knows nothing, and only fabricates "facts". The legal name is Azalia Rangel Garcia who was born on August 13, 1978.
Azalia de Torreon grew up, like most of us, in a home indoctrinated by the teachings of the Light of the world. The strange thing was that her mother enrolled her in a Catholic school, according to her, so that she would be familiar with the catechism to be able to "defend" the lldm doctrine. In her adolescence, she experienced the traumatic farewell of her mother, who, as they say, died after choking on a piece of bread while studying for a 9am prayer. Her younger sister, Maria José, was the one who found her. They say her mother was a saint — what would she think of you, Azalia, if she knew everything you've done and what you've become? — As the older sister, she had to mature from that young age, now she was going to have to help take care of her little siblings, but the good thing is that she was not left alone, they were not left alone. At that time, Leonardo Baltazar, who became a godfather for Azalia, was a minister in the Torreon church. Leonardo and Dolores (Lola) , his wife, took care of the children of the Rangel Garcia home, there was great appreciation for them and they practically lived in the pastoral house. It didn't take long for Azalia's home to soon have a mother again, when her father, Javier Rangel, fell in love with María José's elementary school teacher, Ms. Rocio.
This is how Azalia grew up, and she decided to study law, she wanted to be a lawyer, she moved to Mexico City to study and while she was there, she stayed at the house of some brothers and was considered a "missionary" although because of her studying, she did not go frequently to church. Between the time she was studying and when she graduated, she met Naason, whom she began to help with APEM (Association of Professionals and Entrepreneurs of Mexico) plans. She became Naason's main personal assistant and in turn began a romance with him. As the romance became a little more notorious, in order to cover her affair, Azalia had to get married, and she ended up marrying Gadiel Meléndez Arroyo, a "young man" from Mexico City who had gone to study in England at the University of Cambridge (as one of his aunts boasted about). Gadiel already had a reputation not worthy of a believer because it was said that he had a boyfriend back on British soil. Gadiel's family has money, a lot of money. They are owners of bakeries in CDMX, who actually did not become rich because of the bread but because there was a shortage of sugar and luckily they were the only ones who had the product available and with that they made their millions possible. In the end he was the ideal candidate, and in order to cover his frowned upon homosexual tendencies, the marriage agreement with Azalea was reached.
Of course, the marriage between Azalia and Gadiel did not mean that her affair with Naason ended. She continued and she was still Naason's principal assistant. In the northern jurisdiction building, when it was still that ugly orange building, and when the Berea USA facilities were there, nobody, NOBODY came to Naason without first going through Azalia. Sometimes he would lock himself in the office “alone” for hours and tell Azalia not to let anyone in, not even his very own wife Alma. And it also happened that Pastor Naason locked himself in the office with Azalia to…. Well, you know, to "read the holy scriptures" ha.
In December 2014, when Naason ascended to the throne, the first assistant of the Apostle Njg was nothing more and nothing less than Azalia Rangel García. What a scandal because she was married, "how was she going to serve the SOG?" was gossiped about about. But as Naason said "I am the only one in charge here", well he did what a SOG had not done before, he had a married woman as his personal assistant, who alternated months with Naason and for about two weeks returned with her husband from from time to time, to try to "hide” their affair. And yes, then Oyuki, Becky, Susie, Sibia, Azalia's sisters, etc... came in, but none of them could take Azalia's place of power.
And look, before you say "she was a victim too", no, don't come to me with that shit. The others were victims because they were deceived by faith, even Alondra, but not Azalia. Azalia was not like the others, she was and still is Naason's right hand. Naason did not abuse her, she loved him just as he loved her. If there was someone Naason listened to and someone who gave Naason advice, yes, literally gave him advice, it was Azalia. Azalia recruited Naason's closest victims and if there was a girl Azalia didn't like, she had the power to get rid of her, to take away "her blessings". The most filthy and aberrant things that Naason did were with Azalia and with Azalia's help. Naason's darkest secrets are known by Azalia.

I 24M been saved for 4 years, I love the Lord, I trust him with my life. He's done so much for me. Showing me the positive aspects of life, showing me the right ways to live, putting amazing people in my life who care for me and help me. But one thing He hasn't done for me is help me find a paramour. I've always struggled with talking to girls, being too shy around them. Working on becoming more confident. Before, I struggled with lonesomeness cuz I didn't have a lot of friends, so I joined a large community church. Powerful pastor, amazing people that have really made in impact on my life and my walk with the Lord. And I also joined a martial arts to gym, where I usually go to during the week. It's kickboxing and BJJ. And that's helped me a good deal, exercising, having fun and meeting people at the same time. That I've been doing for a year and a half. But lately for like a month now, I've lost interest in it and now I haven't been going to it. Before I loved it and enjoyed the heck out of it. But I just lost interest in it all of a sudden. And I fear it's because in my mind, I'm so distraught that I don't have a girlfriend. In my mind I'm like "I just wish I had a girl to hang out with and I don't wanna do anything else." I'm always at church Sunday morning, Saturday morning prayer and Tuesday night bible study. But besides that, all I've been doing when I'm not at work is sit at home, watch tv, listen to music. I think about what everyone says "stop looking, learn to love yourself first, focus on your relationship with Jesus first". And I believe those things. And I don't wanna rush it, I want to meet the right person, a person I'm actually in love with, not someone I'm chasing just cuz they're good looking. It's all I've been thinking about lately it's like clouding my mind. I recently started seeing a christian counselor to talk to about this and other personal issues. Sorry for the long post. If anyone has any word of wisdom or encouragement for me I'd appreciate it.

It seems to me that the United Methodist Church is losing congregations who are (mostly?) joining the newly formed Global Methodist Church over issues of gender and sexuality.

• What other issues are precipitating the departure of these congregations?
• Any there any stats as to the percentage of churches choosing to disfellowship and their locations (e.g. by country)?

I understand that UMC pastors, at least around where I live, minister to a congregation for an appointed term before being shuffled to another by a hierarchical group I don't know the name of.

• Are congregations that discern leaving the UMC losing their pastors? Or is that a case-by-case basis whether the pastor also wants to leave? Or is there another process entirely for clergy?

I remember years ago that there was dissent around enforcing discipline on clergy (or congregations?) who celebrated queer marriages. It honestly seemed to me that the progressive churches were the ones likely to leave.

• Was there a decision at the denomination level (e.g. at a convention) that sparked the Exodus? What was it?

Most of the news I see is about congregations and the denomination fighting to retain their property. This is a painful process which can leave everyone in a bad light. I grieve for my brothers and sisters and siblings going through this turmoil, and pray for amicable resolutions.

• Anything else to add?

And my church wanted to offer me the chance to make a judgment call on someone’s sin - like the Methodists voting to break apart and calling for a vote among church members to decide if homosexuals should be able to have leadership positions in the church - I would say the church was doing the devil’s work.
Matthew 7:1-5: “Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother's eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?”
Do pastors not sin? Does any human not sin? Be them rapists, adulterers, fornicators, and still hold leadership in the church. Be them pedophiles and bishops and powerful men. If it’s the Bible you follow, sins aren’t tiered. If the church is calling on its parishioners to make a judgment, be it for all sins or it be damned.

This is in reference to a question I posed during a Protestant hot seat session:
Q: Jesus established a chain through Peter which has continued to this day through the popes - How come we are OK being separated from that line? How do other church justify breaking from this line?
A: The bible passage you’re referring to is found in Matthew 16:13-19:
When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, “Who do people say the Son of Man is?” They replied, “Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, Jeremiah or one of the prophets.” “But what about you?” he asked. “Who do you say I am?” Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.” Jesus replied, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by flesh and blood, but by my Father in heaven. And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not overcome it. I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven; whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.”
As you point out, Roman Catholics interpret this passage as Jesus establishing the papacy starting with Peter. But that’s definitely not the only way to understand the text. Reading the passage we see that Jesus was drawing out the disciples personal faith stance. He started out with a leading question - “who do others say I am?” - followed by a defining question - “who do you say I am?” Jesus had chosen and called these very disciples. And though they knew Jesus was somebody special, their understanding of Jesus as Messiah was a progressive journey. And so here’s a critical turning point where Jesus asks them (not just Peter) - are you like others still in the “Jesus is a special person” category or have you come to a deeper conclusion about me? Note that Jesus didn’t force the issue, he just asked - “who do you say I am?”
Peter was first out of the gate to answer, but that’s not to say that he’s the only one who had a light bulb moment with respect to Jesus. Jesus rejoiced that he/they had finally understood, and then asserted that on the profession of Peter’s faith he would build his church.
One of the very simple ways to understand Jesus’ declaration regarding Peter is that he would build his church through those who, like Peter, recognized Jesus to be more than just a prophet, but to be the Messiah. Peter and the rest of the disciples (less Judas) would be instrumental in the launch of the church. Think of them as some of the original pioneers, but not as popes. In fact this is exactly what we find in scripture. In Ephesians 2:20-19 we read Consequently, you are no longer foreigners and strangers, but fellow citizens with God’s people and also members of his household, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets,with Christ Jesus himself as the chief cornerstone. Jesus is the cornerstone and all the apostles are equal. If anything, Jesus fulfils the role of pope.
A few more things to note: Jesus did build his church through those who professed him as Messiah. This is what happened on the day of Pentecost when the church was born (cf Acts 2). And yes, Peter was a key spokesperson that day, but not the only one to be indwelt by the Spirit, and to speak in foreign languages. Later when God used persecution to scatter the church (cf Acts 8ff), it is everyday believers that the Spirit used to build the church. They preached the gospel in the very locations that they sought refuge. This is how the gospel and the church started going global. Jesus never said “Peter you will be the first pope.” In fact there is no mention of any pope or papal office in scripture. This is significant because it tells us that those present that day didn’t understand Jesus to be anointing Peter as pope or to instituting the papacy. That only happened years later, arguably some 400 years later when Christianity became the dominant religion of Rome. Catholics will obviously disagree with this point as they trace the papacy back to Peter. But historically speaking, the early church wasn’t structured by anything resembling the papacy of today. Elders were established in local churches (cf Acts 14:23, Titus 1:5). And not by succession or birth right but by virtue of their faith in Jesus and character. If there was ever meant to be a pope it should have been the apostle Paul. He was called by Jesus, established as an apostle to the Gentiles (think church planter extraordinaire), and wrote 12 books of the New Testament to Peter’s 2. He travelled further abroad than Peter, planted more churches, and wrote more to build churches up in our most holy faith. Note that Paul also confronted Peter (cf Galatians 2:11ff). After his resurrection and prior to his ascension Jesus commissioned his followers to go make disciples and to grow his kingdom (aka build his church). We find these commissions in both Matthew 28:18-20 and Acts 1:7-8. Jesus always commissioned his followers as a whole. No special mention is made of Peter. That’s not to say that Peter was unimportant. It just points to the fact that Peter wasn’t a pope to which Jesus passed on his baton. This is consistent with the ways of Jesus, and teaching of the New Testament. The whole notion of a papal hierarchy with succession is actually very un-Jesus and un-New Testament like.
All this to say that Peter was instrumental in God’s plan to build his church. But not as pope, nor was he alone. What we see in the New Testament is the Spirit of God using people who like Peter confessed Jesus as the promised Messiah to build his church. So really, we “haven’t separated ourselves from that line,” we simply don’t see Jesus ever having established the papacy. Hope this helps, lots more could be said but I’m trying to keep things short (ish).

Essentially I worked at a church for 8 months as a youth pastor, and what I experienced caused me to start questioning everything. I’ve deconstructed my faith. I was previously what I would call a progressive christian that had been “discipled” at a fundamentalist church, thought God was calling me into ministry, stepped into ministry, had my fire for the Lord snuffed out by what I saw behind the scenes and experienced.
Essentially last night I told this woman a bit of my story and then she told me I should start praying, reading my Bible, and listening to worship music again, because she just couldn’t believe that I still wasn’t the same Bible beating, evangelist I used to be. I told her crying that I didn’t understand why God would have called me to such a horrible shit storm. And she said we don’t know but maybe it’s for His glory. And as I cried and listened to her I was aware of how crazy all this things I used to think sounded as they came out of her mouth, and how I was acutely aware that she has a cult mindset, like I used to, and how’s there’s a good chance she will probably never “wake up” from the toxicity that is American Evangelicalism. And so for me, for her, for the death of the person I was, and for what happened to me while I worked at the church — I cried. I bawled. At an upscale sushi restaurant. And wiped my mascara stained face all over their nice fabric napkins. Because the tears wouldn’t stop coming.
I don’t hate her. I think I more feel sad for her. I feel sad for the person I was and don’t think I’ll ever be again. Sad for the fact that she thought what she was saying was helping.
Today I’ve been listening to people’s “deconstruction” playlists on Spotify, and just got this text from her:
———— “I read this today and felt led to share it with you:
“Before you were led astray, you were so faithful to Messiah. Why have you now turned away from what is right and true? Who has deceived you? The One who enfolded you into his grace is not behind this false teaching that you’ve embraced. Not at all! Don’t you know that when you allow even a little lie into your heart, it can permeate your entire belief system? Deep in my heart I have faith that the Lord Jesus the Anointed One, who lives in you, will bring you back around to the truth. And I’m convinced that those who agitate you, whoever they think they are, will be brought under God’s judgment!” ‭‭Galatians‬ ‭5‬:‭7‬-‭10‬ ‭TPT‬‬
Jesus loves you so much and so do I!! ————
I know she thinks this was loving but man, it’s crazy how self righteous this seems now being on the other side of deconstructing. She told me she’d love to get dinner with me again and that I can call her anytime and ask her what she thinks about things as I work through them. I don’t think I want to meet with her again.

Essentially I worked at a church for 8 months as a youth pastor, and what I experienced caused me to start questioning everything. I’ve deconstructed my faith. I was previously what I would call a progressive christian that had been “discipled” at a fundamentalist church, thought God was calling me into ministry, stepped into ministry, had my fire for the Lord snuffed out by what I saw behind the scenes and experienced.
Essentially last night I told this woman a bit of my story and then she told me I should start praying, reading my Bible, and listening to worship music again, because she just couldn’t believe that I still wasn’t the same Bible beating, evangelist I used to be. I told her crying that I didn’t understand why God would have called me to such a horrible shit storm. And she said we don’t know but maybe it’s for His glory. And as I cried and listened to her I was aware of how crazy all this things I used to think sounded as they came out of her mouth, and how I was acutely aware that she has a cult mindset, like I used to, and how’s there’s a good chance she will probably never “wake up” from the toxicity that is American Evangelicalism. And so for me, for her, for the death of the person I was, and for what happened to me while I worked at the church — I cried. I bawled. At an upscale sushi restaurant. And wiped my mascara stained face all over their nice fabric napkins. Because the tears wouldn’t stop coming.
I don’t hate her. I think I more feel sad for her. I feel sad for the person I was and don’t think I’ll ever be again. Sad for the fact that she thought what she was saying was helping.
Today I’ve been listening to people’s “deconstruction” playlists on Spotify, and just got this text from her:
———— “I read this today and felt led to share it with you:
“Before you were led astray, you were so faithful to Messiah. Why have you now turned away from what is right and true? Who has deceived you? The One who enfolded you into his grace is not behind this false teaching that you’ve embraced. Not at all! Don’t you know that when you allow even a little lie into your heart, it can permeate your entire belief system? Deep in my heart I have faith that the Lord Jesus the Anointed One, who lives in you, will bring you back around to the truth. And I’m convinced that those who agitate you, whoever they think they are, will be brought under God’s judgment!” ‭‭Galatians‬ ‭5‬:‭7‬-‭10‬ ‭TPT‬‬
Jesus loves you so much and so do I!! ————
I was just incredibly triggered by this entire experience.

I grew up in a small rural town in south Texas and was only exposed to Christian and Catholic religions due to the isolation of the area. I participated in Christian church, Bible study, church choir, the whole 9 yards. For perspective, my town had 2500 people total.
But even as a child, I was always confident and verbal that I wasn’t Christian or at least, did not believe in that religion. I always believed in rebirth and often got punished for being so outspoken and questioning. I heavily questioned the pastor or Bible study teacher and was essentially punished or ignored. As a child, I could never understand christian beliefs because it didn’t make sense to me. I had my own idea of rules and a way of living that did not compliment Christianity.
When I finally got to college, I took a Philosophy class and was exposed to a variety of religions including Buddhism. When I learned what Buddhism was, I knew instantly that I was Buddhist. It was quite an ‘enlightening’ experience. No questions asked, this matched what I already believed and practiced, even though I have never heard of it before. It was such a relief to realize I wasn’t alone and there was a name for the beliefs I held. Yes there has been much to learn in this way of life that I am new to, but reflecting back, I have always been Buddhist and I feel this in my heart.
Has anyone else felt this way or had a similar experience?

meadows has been quite vocal on his christian faith:
Meadows’ Christian faith is one of the core parts of his identity. In his official biography, Meadows calls himself “above all ... a deeply committed Christian, and someone who has demonstrated a devotion to his faith even in the highest pressure environments.” He said helping secure the release of a Christian imprisoned by the Sudanese government was one of his proudest accomplishments. https://www.newsobserver.com/news/politics-government/article241029966.html
meadows discusses his faith on cbn https://www1.cbn.com/cbnnews/politics/2017/novembefreedom-caucus-leader-rep-mark-meadows-god-gets-the-credit
meadows' discusses his faith w/ the christian post https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EZVQFtCTBrA 'knowing myself to be a committed christian...' - (go to 10.30 mark): https://www.c-span.org/video/?431640-1/mark-meadows-tells-senate-cancel-recess-finish-health-care
Meadows, a onetime North Carolina congressman who describes himself as a committed Christian, details the lead-up to the [trump] photo op in his new book, The Chief’s Chief, published in December. Meadows notes his concern upon observing the growing crowd of demonstrators outside the White House in the days before the photo op, writing: “[I] noticed that the crowds were getting a little too close to [the church] for my liking.” https://religionnews.com/2021/12/10/in-new-book-mark-meadows-confirms-trump-bible-photo-op-was-ivankas-idea/
Meadows has also emphasized his Christian values — campaign materials describe him as a “Christian conservative businessman” — and he sits on the Foreign Affairs subcommittee on human rights. [...] https://rollcall.com/2015/07/28/mark-meadows-a-brief-biography-2/
Meadows acknowledged the pastors’ political influence. “Perhaps your congregations want you to keep quiet from the pulpit. Perhaps your congregation says, ‘Well, we don’t want to get political.’ And you know what, if you decide to yield to that, I can tell you that you’re not hearing from our heavenly father. Because if you censor your own speech, the enemy has already won, guys.” Perkins praised Meadows as chairman of the Freedom Caucus for “leading a band of conservative warriors.” https://www.thedailybeast.com/what-is-trump-chief-of-staff-mark-meadows-shadow-job-keep-the-evangelicals-on-board-the-trump-train
'Above all, Congressman Meadows is a deeply committed Christian, and someone who has continuously demonstrated a devotion to his faith even in the highest pressure environments.' https://www.cpi.org/staff/mark-meadows/
why meadows is in the news today:

POINT OF PRIVILEGE — MARK MEADOWS and other top former DONALD TRUMP aides may be forced to testify in the federal investigation into the 2020 election aftermath after a federal judge ruled that they could not avoid testifying due on executive privilege grounds, ABC’s John Santucci, Katherine Faulders and Jonathan Karl scooped. Judge BERYL HOWELL last week said subpoenas from special counsel JACK SMITH could go forward, though Trump will probably appeal that decision. In addition to Meadows, the ruling affects KEN CUCCINELLI, NICK LUNA, JOHN McENTEE, STEPHEN MILLER, ROBERT O’BRIEN, JOHN RATCLIFFE and DAN SCAVINO.

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