Brother tattoo ideas

I am a huge urban-fantasy fan, but there's precious little of it out there that meets my standards. The combination of the mundanely familiar mixed with fantastical and impossible is my favorite genre, especially if it's in the monster of the week format. I've enjoyed classics of the genre, from Narnia to Dresden Files to Stranger Things to Goonies, and the list goes on (though not much longer. For example, I enjoyed but couldn't finish Lockwood and co.)
Oh, and I should probably note: SPOILER WARNING, and also SCROLL WARNING. This is long.
Ever since I heard of supernatural, I'd assumed it was bad. In my mind, it was a darkly lit, broody, shallow show about two highly attractive actors doing things the writers thought "sounded cool" to impress an audience of screaming fan-girls.
This was based on a couple of google searches, while I scoured the internet for intelligent and well written urban fantasy. I read part of a plot summary once, and it said basically "This brother died, then came back, but the other brother died, and then when he came back the first one died now," and I was like "this seems contrived, and kinda boring," Secondly, this show was produced by CW, which has developed a reputation for the kind of writing in their shows. Lastly, it was apparently "very gay" which, while admirable, isn't my taste.
This was an incomplete understanding. A friend of mine said I was good at dissecting media, so here goes. I'm going from memory, so there might be a few errors. It was 12 hours ago.
The first episode opens by establishing character motivations by showing us the inciting incident, and then cuts to the future so we can see how that has effected our characters. We are then treated to both eye and soul candy as one of the brothers is in a wholesome relationship with his girlfriend. This is not something I was expecting, since it will help to create contrast with the darker things happening in the show, making them appear even darker by comparison, and lures the audience into getting invested with these characters. The acting was amateur, but not bad. Kinda reminded me of Buffy, which is a show I adore (Especially the first 4 seasons).
After that, we are interrupted by Brother 2. I do not remember which is Dean and which is Sam, so for the sake of not annoying a lot of people brother 1 is the younger brother who looks like Luke Skywalker, loves the idea of living a normal life, and has resigned himself that there is nothing to be done about the supernatural. brother 2 is older, loves the idea of hunting monsters, and holds out hope. This contrast is layered on with brother 1, the resigned one, being overall more hopeful about the future, while brother 2 is more grim, and puts on a "tough guy" facade (or maybe that was just the acting).
The plot itself was tightly written, and it obeyed the laws of physics and magic it established. I know that might sound like a low bar, especially considering it was a pilot episode, but you'd be surprised how often Hollywood writers mess up obvious physics for no reason. " I mean, it's a supernatural show, so it already doesn't make any sense because magic, so who's gunna notice," BUT I DO, because without physics being consistent, you can't have an understanding of what's going to happen, and it makes it damn hard to have stakes. The physics of earth are right there, and easy to research. For example, I appreciate how the windows explode at the beginning due to a sudden burst of heat. That is both "logical physics" and a cool visual. Sometimes physics go out the window in favor of a cool scene, like shooting out the tires of a car, but doing that shouldn't cause the car to start flipping end over end, unless you don't want to be taken seriously.
This is a good sign moving forward, along with the depth of character that was established in the first scene the brothers meet. So far I've seen Efficient Writing, with scenes accomplishing multiple things at the the same time, and Good Writing, where we've been introduced to people we like, who want to do something, and don't want to do some other thing. I know that's vague, but it's my baseline.
Brother 2 asks Brother 1 to help save their dad, brother 1 is like "Oh, I'm sure he's fiiiiine," and brother 2 is like "there's a chance he isn't, Are you coming?" and brother 1 says "ok, but I have to be back by for an interview," which established a time limit. Brother 2 scoffs at the idea, but doesn't push back very hard because it's what his brother wants. Brother 2 couldn't imagine living like that, getting a job, trying to live a normal life after what happened to their mother, with the whole "being sucked into the ceiling by fire or maybe burned alive" thing. The best part is that the interview immediately creates a looming clock, which will cause conflict if it's not met. If the brothers get stuck out there, brother 1 will miss his interview, and that will be a conflict in their relationship. Neither of them want that.
They hit the road, but what the audience is shown isn't a road trip scene. It's the monster. And we aren't shown it. The first we "see" of the monster is the two bro's analyzing a voicemail from Dad, in which the message is "encoded," or something. I couldn't really hear, since I was whispering back and forth to my cousin the whole time these scene was taking place. I think they said it was on a different frequency or something. Regardless, we hear the words "will you take me home?" coming from an unnerving female voice.
THEN we see the monster. She glitches out of the woods, gets into a random young man's car, and has boobs. My first thought was "why isn't he running, she's acting really odd," but then boobs. But, as my cousin pointed out, he could just think she was a drunk woman on a walk home, who wanted a ride. The fact that they move the camera to show that "she isn't actually in the car" enforces the idea of her being a ghost, without anyone saying it. And we aren't given enough information to know why she's killing people, like it doesn't seem Malicious but it doesn't seem Innocent either. We don't even get to see how he dies, since the camera cuts away before a spray of blood splatters the windows. My cousin said this was for "budget reasons" but I think it's a good writing technique. As a rule of thumb, don't show your monsters abilities right away. Figure them out if you need to, but simply show the results of their actions. Then the audience knows what they saw happen, but they don't know exactly what they were looking at. Stranger Things does this a lot in Season 1. There is an explanation, but we don't get to have that right now, so our mind wanders into dark imaginings. How did she kill him? I guess we'll find out if it's relevant, otherwise it's unnecessary information that degrades of mystery factor of the monster.
Ok, so the two get to town, and I don't remember exactly what happened next. They visit the crime scene, posing as US Marshals with fake ID's. Brother 1 acts like he's not a US Marshal, brother 2 acts like he knows everything, and they get a little bit of information. The cops don't suspect anything supernatural could have caused this. They then go to their dad's apartment, which includes this shot where one of them is standing outside, and the other reaches out a hand and yanks him into the apartment. That kind of creative touch added to my enjoyment of the show, creating a little levity, showing their relationship, and stylizing the show. It's those little details that build up to create a mountain, and part of the reason I'm looking forward to watching episode 2.
Plotwise, the cops show up, arrest brother 2, ask him about all the weird stuff in their dad's apartment (I just realized it was actually a hotel room), and very importantly: The cop tells him him and his dad are a suspect in the case. Why? well, from a meta-writing perspective, you want to amp up the stakes and make the cops a human antagonist. Especially since from brother's 2's perspective, they are. The law is just another thing to get in the way of fighting and uncovering supernatural stuff. But in world, why would the cops suspect a random pair of shifty young men who had a hotel room full of strange occult stuff, and a bunch of pictures of women in a white dress. Well, because that is suspicious. It's not something that's easily understood or explained, and akum's razor indicates they are probably just psycho's going around and creating ghost stories for some arcane reason in their madness. Criminals be crazy. But also, brother 2 is acting antagonistic, was using a false name, fake credit cards, and refuses to elaborate or explain anything. He's already a criminal, so the jump to crazy criminal isn't far.
There is a thing that pulls the cops away, so he handcuff's brother 2 to the desk, and leaves after demanding an answer to a large cryptic note. It was clearly written recently. There are still cops around, and he's handcuffed to the desk. It's convincing, if not entirely realistic for the cop to be this relaxed, especially since he's not a proven "dangerous criminal" just a proven fraudster. But, this slightly unrealistic thing is used to enable something awesome. Brother 2 reaches over and opens the notebook. He grabs a paperclip, and we see him holding it. This is "subtle" writing, since we never actually see him picking the lock, but it's not subtle because everyone knows what he's about to do without being told or shown it. It's engaging, builds his list of skills, and his disdain/deference for the law. Efficient Storytelling baby!
I would like to note that there is a part earlier with Inefficient Storytelling, but it's excusable because it was both too subtle and too on the nose. When Dean and Sam first go outside to brother 2's car, he opens a compartment to reveal a bunch of weapons. The modern audience is aware of what the show is "vaguely about" and the presence of the weapons tells us he uses them. Brother 1 then says the line "we were trained to be warriors," which felt off because both people knew this information. It comes off as awkward, and inn inn-efficient. We already knew this! They already knew this! Why is it here?!?! WELL, it's because this is a pilot to a show with no future. Nobody knew it would take off. Nobody's knows if the general audience is going to pick that up from the way they've been speaking to eachother, or the oodles of weapons. A lot of people turn their brains off when they watch T.V, and they don't want to have to work to pick up essential information. "We were trained to be warriors" also fills in the time gap some, shows their relationship with their father by the way he says it, hardens the differences between the characters "one turned away to become normal, and the other accelerated to become a hunter, to the point where he's getting permission to go on solo missions,"
Interesting Trivia: At this point I took a pause to get a drink of water, and scrolled back up. I think I'm probably either 1/2 through or 1/4 of the way through the post.
So far, the plot has led from action to reaction to action smooth as silk, with nuggets of interest building up along the way. There are several questions hanging over the characters, pushing them forward. If I remember correctly, this is when brother 1 goes to the old man, and accuses him of infidelity. His reaction is an answer, and brother 1 runs into the ghost. I really don't remember the order of events after this, but basically what happened was: brother 1 is driven to the ghosts house, she starts to seduce him, he flat out refuses so she transforms, sticks her fingers into his chest, and does "the big suck" with her fingertips. Brother 2 shows up and shoots out the windows of the car to distract the ghost, which gives brother 1 enough time to hit the gas and ram the car through the side of the house. This allows the ghost to reunite with her children, and (after the only special effects I disliked. They were horrendous) she is at peace. There is a small sense of finality on one of the big questions: "what's going to happen with the ghost?" but we still have "what's going to happen with their dad, what did happen to him, etc" and "what's going to happen with the Interview?"
So brother 2 tries to tempt brother 1 into coming with him to find Dad, but brother 1 wants to go home. There's a bit of adorable banter, and then brother 1 is home. Here's where the show surprised me. I was expecting stuff and this point, trying to predict what would happen next. Logically, and heartbreakingly, brother 1 has to go with brother 2. I mean, that's the whole point of the show. But how to do it? As a writer, you have to break the character's underlying motivation for staying. You have to disprove brother 1's philosophy that "a normal life is possible" but how? Well, the episode was already about infidelity... well, not exactly. It featured infidelity of a husband, and brother 1 did the interviewing of that guy. AND there's are sounds in the apartment when brother 1 enters it. Something is going on upstairs. So, I assumed brother 1 would go upstairs, find his lover cheating on him (despite there being no foreshadowing for this, and in fact she shut down brother 2's advances), and realize that a normal life wasn't possible because he can't trust girls, or something. BUT IT'S SO MUCH WORSE... uh, I mean better.
Brother 1 goes upstairs to find the bedroom empty, despite the sound. He then finds his wife stuck to the ceiling, and the audience knows exactly what comes next because we saw it all in the beginning. Every step, from the fire to the stunned expression, to the pain, to brother 2 dragging brother 1 out of the burning apartment. This is so perfect!
For all he knows, She loved him to Last. Brother 1 has no hope for a normal life anymore because he is to become his father, a man who's wife was murdered by magnetic ceiling fire. Why? We'll find out at some point. But this is so good!!! The brother who is least like the father now has a massive parallel with him. He can no longer believe that it's possible to live a normal life and ignore the supernatural. He has a responsibility to make sure this kind of thing doesn't happen to normal people. And!!! this puts him in contrast with his brother, who has already been shown to be a "heyyy girl," type of guy. Brother 1 will likely have trouble with another girl, as his lover loved him to the last. Perhaps he should have told her more, enough to be prepared. Perhaps there was something he could have done...
Those are my thoughts. I loved it, the characters are deep and developed while fitting into the familiar archetypes of Lumberjack and Homemaker, and I'd really like to talk about my cousins "New paper nitpick" but I don't have time. I'll be back to read comments. Ideally don't spoil anything too big for me, but I don't mind. This show looks awesome, and I look forward to watching it all throughout the rest of my life.

TLDR, my unconscious has become conscious, therapy failed but I'm kicking trauma butt generationally, yet I'm still so broken. Is there a version of talk therapy that would help me and my daughter?
I (M40+) have CPTSD, 2months premie, no touch for 8 weeks in an incubator, sick brother who passed away from 2-6. Violent childhood “you should have died instead of ” beatings, homeless teen 30+ PTSDs, no education past 16. Turned my life around at 21, successful adult working just below C-Level in large MMCs, lived in a couple of different countries, still don’t own a house but who can these days if you live in a major city.
Therapy of 5 years went wrong for me 1 1/2 years ago. We had a rupture and she told me she felt a deep love for me, she thought our inner childs connected, Im one of her favourite client, always in her head, she always envisioned she would ask me to be friends 2 years from when she retired or I finished treatment, if I left she would be devastated and need therapy herself. 100% invested in me and my daughters outcome.
I ran, that’s terrifying to me… not aware I was attached and it ripped all my repressed trauma out and I started to have nonstop flashbacks from when I was 18months old to 21. I went back asking what the hell is happening help! but she made mistake after mistake desperately trying to salvage and repair but my trauma just consumed us e.g. complimenting my inner child and angering my protector parts as she wasn’t safe, poking a flashback instead of grounding, she started to be in my trauma nightmares, I ended up burning the relationship to prevent me from keep going back and she probably should have terminated/transferred me out long before that point as it always made me worse if I tried to re-engage with her. I was stuck in flashbacks for a year, my log comes to approx 69,700 flashbacks, it was rough and terrifying. Private Hospitals turned me away, 80% of therapist will not touch me, the few that would had no idea how to help get me out of that state. My daughters attachment completely shutdown from the way I was neglecting her from being so nonfunctional and broken.
I used to be bitter at the lack of accountability and how the industry turned away, apparently it as my attachment that played out… A hospital even said “We have seen this a few times, its sad when this happens but imagine what it would be like for the other patients, hear how you talk, everything you learnt, all your work and yet this can happen, what would it do to them?” I felt like the industries dirty secret.
This isn’t an anti therapy post though. I'm glad it went wrong as I wouldn’t have been able to do what I did with my daughter’s challenges. I just don’t know what to do next and want to see if anyone has any ideas or resource materials that might help?
I found Dr Dan Browns 3 pillaPerfect Parent work via a podcast: therapy uncensored TU87 complex trauma and attachment. It taught me that CPTSD is a disorganised attachment with trauma on top… heal the attachment then the trauma can clear without much work, or you can then clear it relationally… It made me realize I gave my daughter a disorganised attachment, her fear of my voice/face expression is the fear of us rupturing from my triggers and me withdrawing, dissociating instead of watching over her from the pain my love for her brings me. A separation incident when she was 2 her first “PTSD”, (who am I kidding, Im probably PTSD 1-10). We thought she was HSP, intense from birth, smart, deep, very verbal… She has just been diagnosed ASD1, her behviours only really kicked off after the separation incident and got worse as I got worse. I figured I have to get myself out of the flashbacks, I can’t give up as that would be another PTSD for her… I have to heal our attachment to heal her challenges. In my hardest night as a teen, my 16 year old self swore if he ever had a child they would never feel what he did and yet I had failed this badly? It might be ASD but Im going to visit the elephant in the room… Im going to call it pre-verbal PTSDs/sensory overloads, developmental and attachment trauma all from me that is probably implicit memories now… She has CPTSD if Dan Browns view is right and developing in constant flight/flight would present as autism from the sensory overload.
I ended up creating my own therapy modality for when therapy goes wrong. I work in an industry where if things go wrong we fix it and then spread awareness, if Dan Brown knew why therapy goes wrong for some or makes them feel worse and had a solution, the signs of too much trauma and disassociation, why does the industry not know and try to fix that failure rate? Just look at therapyabuse, its all attachment trauma, BDP/CPTSD. I can’t be angry at my ex-therapist when she was doing what she taught and was setup for failure - Trauma informed would make me worse due to my sensory and trauma profile.
It worked, my approach stopped my flashbacks, I then adapted it for my daughter. Heal her attachment and her trauma will pass. As I was reading more psych stuff, scraping university’s for learning materials and reading books to understand therapy, the process, what it should have been, I came across Aletha Solters developmental psych work… This women is a child whisperer. Her books tears and tantrums, attachment play and healing your traumatised child are incredible, it was all the missing pieces of my kids behavior. Bruce Perrys work and the concept of a child not being able to get themselves out of the trauma brain stem… My wife was stressed by my first few flashbacks when she was pregnant. Our kid was 4+Kg and we are small… All early signs we were unaware of and not getting picked up by the health industry, GPs should have a checklist our family situation is so textbook its tragic.
I took my kid to the beach and we went in the cold sea for cold therapy, use our reflexes if we can’t do it together naturally: shocking us both back into the parasympathetic nervous system, I did this a few times every couple of days, it also matches the concept of the intensity of the play should be close to the trauma that Aletha writes about. Me holding her as she can’t swim bringing her arousal up and down via cold temp and keeping her safe (She loved putting her private parts under the cold tap which gave me that idea! Very Freudian her parts knew what she needed, my version of IFS, I listened to your sensory parts as senses comes before emotion, that is how stupid I went with therapy concepts, joking around and doing the opposite). I got her OT to train to do Proges Safe and Sound protocol, hit the polyvagal nerve too (I wasn’t going to rely on just one approach). I then used attachment concepts and Aletha’s Attachment Play concepts to be the perfect parent as per Dan Browns approach, as I can’t teach my kid to visualize yet. I need to be that parent. I’ve built a plan up until 12 for a child 3 pillar approach, teaching her meta cognitive awareness and more explore/group activities to heal her attachment wounds and feel more safe with people.
Here is an example, my daughters ASD food sensitivity behaviour: treat it as a pre-verbal “trauma/stress” that was some how caused by me (I rushed her one time and playing over sad another time that she didn’t like a new dish I made… she is that empathic and sensitive…) I noticed she was activated in a flight fight by the way she was moving her body and lips like I would when I struggle to eat feeling sick when triggered and figured of course you wouldn’t want to eat in the mode, I asked to leave the room to make her feel safe, let her know I wasn’t angry at her. My wife attuned to her fear and made her feel safe, set the boundary that we can’t cook something else and then gave her the choice to eat it on her own or be spoon fed like a baby but Mum will pretend to be a robot to feed her… Aletha’s concept of regression play to heal … they laughed together though the meal. Afterwards I come back and ask if I can do that with her next time. She laughs and says yes but you have to pretend to throw food in my face if Im too slow (One of my concepts is that people hide insecurities in humour… ) It worked, she asked to do it again every now and then if she struggles as she might not be sure if she likes a dish, sometimes she likes it sometimes she just gives it a go and leaves a bit but its laughter between us all then the next time she eats the dish on her own if she liked it.
She started to ask to play hide and seek outside, in groups of people, in supermarkets, taking it more and more extreme healing her own separation trauma. She asks for pillow fights with me, building games with all the concepts Aletha writes, it so profound to witness… Its textbook, my daughrer hasnt read the book but she is asking to play the exact games written in the book for each challenge. We can watch other kids and see the same in them. She started a new school and just walked in from the car with no tears on day 2, didn’t even need a teacher. Pre-December she used to cry up until I passed her to the teacher for handover.
We played hide and seek for a year in OT but nothing changed. It wasn’t until my idea to get her out of the trauma brain stem did we see the shift, she no longer loops over fears, her attachment system opened up and made friends. She stopped grinding her teeth in her sleep. Now she acts like a sensitive anxious kid and people don’t believe us if we tell them she has ASD. My wife cried at what I had achieved last year but at the same time says she feels disgust that she loves me and had a kid with me. That me being me broke our daughter.
The therapists Ive tried to see just say I’m intimidating, the self awareness and the amount I have read this year, how does your brain even put that together, there is too much going on in there. I take them through every concept that impacted me growing up my modality and approaches. The way I mashed up lots of concepts, natural reflexes/Wim Hoff/Porges/IFS/Dan Browns/Love Languages/Alteha’s into a healing force. How I used symbolic play to heal my therapy trauma via my complaint that I never bothered submitting like a silly man child. I feel like none of them can help though. I need someone that can help build practical interventions for the challenges based off the psych concept at play or guide me to them. Not just talking about the problems, if I had reframed and listened that I was doing enough, there is no such thing as disorganised in a child, its just 33% of the time you have to get it right, its not me, its never the parents etc my child would be way down the spectrum with a closed attachment system. Therapist also don’t give advice… e.g. My child hid pain… No one could help figure out what to do… It was poor Interoceptive awareness plus the fear of showing negative emotions. e.g. a parent hitting a wall whilst holding their baby and pretending the baby is hurt then the baby starts to cry but in reverse. She is too shocked by the external impact to process it so shutdowns. I used DBT concept, a whiteboard to draw out what just happened, describe what she might be feeling but visually, bringing her back into awareness… She cried! She now scolds me if she hurts herself as somehow its my fault as it makes her feel safe to cry straight away. Now it is just me holding that anger at me, accepting it and then gently DBTing describing her experience to help her process what really happened in the moment. Building that trust and safety back.
An example for how I treat myself now. I lost my hearing in Feb, Nerusensori hearing loss, it came back and sound hurt like knifes digging in my ears. Loud noises left me in agony for 2-3 days. The Drs went be glad your hearing is back, get therapy for the life adjustments… You read of people close to suicide, relationships ruined by this condition. My daughter started to regress as I withdrew, her laughter hurting my ears too much. (Pretty cruel after a year of flashback to get a setback like that)
So I treated it like the trauma it was… I went and did cold therapy for me(I have other tricks for getting out of the trauma response, people reading this please don’t throw yourself in the sea or your autistic kids either), dive in the sea and screamed a rude word every couple of days, I figured I can’t get myself out of the brain stem too and this was really traumatic. Remedial massages to loosen the muscles around the ear that would have tensed up in the trauma guarding response. That would be pinching the ear nerve making the muscle tense stuck in a loop… Acupuncture as that is better than massages and a lesson in mindfulness to relax else it hurts more and then the Watson headache technique to loosen up C1/C2 that would also be upsetting the brainstem by the muscles all tightening up…. It worked, in 5 days hearing stopped hurting, then I went and got a muscle relaxer from the GP which took all the remaining pain away and went out forcing myself to go hear loud noises in the city and heal the trauma response that had started to happen from the fear of the pain. Trauma doesnt seem to stick anymore, I have a slightly stronger base.
I don’t dissociate anymore, when I struggle I visualise the energy in my nervous system as what some people would call your spirit but in the form of a flame, mine is strong but burns red (anger), green, orange, giving off toxic smoke, sometimes gasping its last breath other time roaring out hurting people around it, no matter how hard Im trying its hurting the flames around it, suffocating them too. I have to hold my flame in love, pure and white, strong but not too intense, the white light people say they see is just someone achieving non-duality with the collective conscious, the energy within us all etc. I picture the moment with my ex-therapist, the safety, attunement, the moment of profound deep love between us (it wasn’t sexual just a deep human connection, I prefer the label kindred spirits). That is my calm base what I am taking from the relationship and integrating, the rest I am letting go of. I find that space within me and then I bring the love I have for my daughter into that space, the first 4 months oxycontin feeling. I give that to myself then I roar my spirit/flame in delight.. upwards, not grounding for coming up with this nonsense. I then bring the disregulation back and hold it in that love and delight like a parent would to their baby in the first few months. After a while the disregulation passes and then I ground myself briefly… My daughter taught me that. “Sometimes its good to have quiet play but other times I need to let the energy out”. Like “circle of security” you should always end any trauma work in delight.
I hold my daughters disregulation and the way it triggers me the same way. The disgust in myself for how I failed so badly that makes me lash out in frustration, how that disgust brings onion layers of my own traumas to the surface that I hold in that flame meditation in the moment of trying to sooth us both. I do things like swimming in a cold pool with her so I have to watch her nonstop as she is learning and she can delight as she sees me watching her nonstop plus the top up of cold therapy just in case. Go jump together in a trampoline park (its a way kids regulate and I need it too!), finding activities together that take my weaknesses and make them strengths. Sit on an exercise ball so I can bounce and rock when I watch over her play to keep me present, I almost fall off if I go too much in my head and it brings me back.
I’m going to be her earned secure attachment and she will heal and her sensitivity will be her strength too like they are mine, they say trauma changes your DNA, humans don’t change for it to be a curse, it’s the source of healing.
The thing is… Im still so broken, its been 4 months since I stopped the flashbacks, my nervous system is so fragile, it still has a feather trigger for disregulation, worse than it was before the rupture. Every day is the same activation in the morning that I have to work through or family ruptures/life stresses, my kid is scared of my voice, I can’t not instruct/parent her and have no idea how to really heal that last part, its the old 80/20 rule, its the hard part now. My brain has been problem solving to get out of a life or death situation for so long. I know Ive done it, Ive created a space for my daughter to heal, its just time now, probably for me too, practicing with her will help me heal my nervous system. It just can’t switch off.
I miss my ex-therapist so much. We both said ”its the relationship I needed not the therapy I needed”. My inner child yearns so badly for that safety and attunement, to hear her voice or laugh, her offer of friendship. I wish she kept that to herself as I never thought about that stuff. My protector kicks the inner child in the nuts when he thinks about it, its frowned upon for a reason. You have to learn about separation and endings as part of attachment healing and integration of relationships. It took 4 years to get attached. To even try again with a therapist seems pointless, I’m even less trusting but I need help. That homeless 16 year old that did it himself, he isn’t better off alone… He needs someone to guide him through the chaos so he can go back to being the child he didn’t get to be… The one challenge with doing Dan Browns perfect parent metallisation is “how do you give yourself something you didn’t get, what is that like to experience?” How can I tell myself “I am enough” when I broke my kid and my wife hurts so much from just being near me when Ive been trying so hard? Its a DBT dialect , I am more than enough yet I am not enough. There is only one place that does IPF work in this country and they are in a different state.
If talk/relational therapy would take 4+ years to get attached again and its so hard to find someone due to my situation. What next for me, is there a different type of therapy I should look for? I need relational therapy that helps problem solve and someone wiling to intellectually masturbate this nonsense with me and come up with approaches for my kid. e.g. draw her morning tasks and I’ll just point at them so I don’t have to use my voice to give her instructions causing a meltdown in the morning if she is slow… (a concept from How to talk to kids book but using drawings as she is 5). Any good resources or material I should read?
Now for my stupid theory that I cant see why it upsets people for some reason. What are your thoughts? If some people view CPTSD and BPD as pretty much the same thing just different flavors of trauma... In my daughters case and possibly mine... a highly functioning presentation of ASD or extreme HSP is a presentation of CPTSD where there was a failure to attach before 4 months old, more pre-verbal stuff. (Ive found a few of us with this profile - see Immi [email protected] eggshelltherapy.com, there are types!)
ASD - some one joked your level of diagnoses depends on how much your behaviors annoy your parents
BDP - a diagnoses that depends on how much your behaviors annoy your therapist
Does that mean girls who are over diagnosed with BDP and under diagnosed with ASD are actually an overlap who's sensitivity to trauma and intensity is being mis-diagnosed?

I’ve been thinking since Yoruzu asked Sukuna to use Malevolent Shrine when fighting her. I’m not going to add on to theories about Sukuna’s CT being related to his tattoos, but more about how some oddities stick out. I want to preface this by saying I have no clue how to read or speak Japanese so I mainly rely on the unofficial and official releases of the chapter’s translation.
Two things stick out to me about Sukuna’s CT: 1. When his initial CT is revealed it was never stated to be CTs but a slashing attack. 2. Yoruzu referring to Sukuna’s CT as Malevolent Shrine, which was introduced to us as his Domain Expansion

1. I know that the translations can easily be mistranslated and all the other things that go into translating a language into another one. I think his slashing ability could just purely be a Cursed Energy property (Hakari jagged energy, Kashimo electricity for example). I don’t think it’s completely out of the realm of possibility for a sorcerer of high caliber to add a trait to their Cursed Energy. Sukuna states to know the truth of Jujutsu which I can assume allows him to use another technique outside his ‘innate’ one. I’m pretty many of us seen the theory about how Malevolent Shrine stores CT so this idea would be mainly backpacking off one of those many theories.
   
2. Why would Yoruzu ask Sukuna to use his DE when she realizes he’s using Megumi’s CT? I can’t imagine Yoruzu goading the King of Curses to use his DE when it’s been stated multiple times that the sorcerers from the Heian period love the thrill of a fight so why would she potentially want to end a fight so soon before it’s even started ? Since Yoruzu is Sukuna’s stalker fan, I’m pretty sure she has some good intel on Sukuna, even how Uraume cooked humans and other animals for Sukuna. So I can’t wrap my head around why she would asked. for a DE to be used so early on in a fight she’s waited over 1000 years for.
   

Malevolent Shrine is Sukuna’s CT and his DE allows him access to other CTs (very original i know).
P.S : Im at work right now and I typed this while taking a break so sorry if it’s not as concise as it needs to be

Just to get this out of the way, I like Eden and Evan, and I can still see potential for the pairing of Jex, but it's becoming insulting at this point for the show to tell us one thing about this pairing, and then continually showing us something else. Are Joss and Dex both very hot? Yes. Do I think that they have the potential to give us Olivia/Johnny, Lulu/Johnny, Lucky/Sam, Kiki/Griffin forbidden romance hotness? Yes. Do they currently come across as anything more than two kids playing house? No. And why is that? Because of the story and the characters themselves.
From the get go, many of us said that the story of Dex and Joss should've been that of Dex and Kristina. We were told that we were crazy and that once the drama of Jex got going it would never stop. So we waited, and waited, and waited. And now we're still waiting.
First we were told to wait until Cameron found out about them. And Cameron did, and he got to speak his mind once and then we never saw him bring it up again.....with anyone. In fact he's already forgiven Joss. Then we were told to wait until Carly finds out. She did, and gave Joss her blessing with only the slightest of warnings. Then we were told to wait until Joss found out about Dex lying to her about being undercover, she'll be livid she was lied to they said. She didn't seem to care. You know who would've been pissed? KRISTINA! Then we were told to wait until Sonny found out about them. He did, and so far, he doesn't seem to care. Perhaps he's playing things close to the vest, but right now, total snooze fest.
Then they said wait until Joss finds out that Michael is Dex's true boss and Michael finds out about Dex dating his sister. Well both things happened today and neither had the slightest of impacts. Joss wasn't all that upset about Michael trying to take Sonny down. And why is that? Because she doesn't care about Sonny or what happens to him. AND WE ALREADY KNEW THIS!!! Do you know who would've been pissed? KRISTINA! As for Michael, his reaction to Dex was really nothing more than, "well I guess this is happening. Just don't get caught." The story just falls flat all the way around. And the reason for that? The characters.
Joss: I truly don't understand what the writers are looking to do with Josslyn. I've said my piece about her regarding Cameron and her flimsy reasoning where Sonny is concerned, so I'll leave that be. But then there is Britt and her siblings. I have NO IDEA why the show thinks it a good idea to have Joss continually downplay Britt's involvement in saving her life. Is that supposed to make us like her more? No doubt some will say it's because she feels guilty, but we've seen NO signs of that guilt. Guilt is going to her memorial service, even just under the guise of supporting Spencer. Guilt is showing love towards Liesl for her loss, even just as a common courtesy. Guilt is checking in with Spencer from time to time and seeing how he's dealing with losing a friend. GUILT, is not stonewalling the police to protect Dex, a gangster who CHOSE to be a gangster. Then there's Donna and Avery. The hurt they'd feel for Sonny going away has no barring in her thinking regarding Michael's plan. Her only concern is losing her boy toy. Speaking of which....
Dex: What are we doing here? Yes, he's good looking. He wants to learn to surf. He likes his dead friend's favorite football team. That's not a character profile, that's a tinder profile. He was abused by his brothers you say? The same brothers he never brings up and we know nothing about? His CO was a bad dude? What proof have we been shown of this? What we do know about Dex is that he was a mercenary. Aka, a criminal. That's fine. GH is littered with them. And we root for them anyway. But maybe stop trying to tell us he is in fact, not a criminal? Or AT LEAST acknowledge that he isn't a very good one.
He and Sonny beat up a reporter, they got caught. Sonny asked him to pressure a juror, and he then proceeds to do so in the most public place in town, and got caught. He was told to protect Diane, and was she was promptly attacked. He was told to get Anna out of jail, and he was almost immediately shot. He was likely told to go to one of Sonny's doctors if he got hurt, but instead went to the Qs, where he could've gotten caught, wrapped Joss up in mob activity, and then forced Joss to get Carly involved in mob activity. He then finally manages to actually save Sonny from headache by pushing him out of the way of a sniper.....and then immediately gets shot forcing Sonny to save him. Then of course there's the fact that he's dating Joss after being told not to by both Michael and Sonny. And yet despite all of that, he's not on anyone's bad side except Spencer, who gets chewed out anytime he tries to call Dex out for being shady.
So I ask you, where's the angst? Where is the potential drama so many spoke of? Because so far, everything we were told to be patient about has amounted to next to nothing. And can you honestly say that that'd be the case if Joss were Kristina? A women who actually cares about Sonny? A women who would actually go toe to toe with Michael over his betrayal? A women who's mother wouldn't just bless her union with a mobster? But since none of that did or will happen, and since we all know this is General(ly) Carly, can we at least subvert expectation and have Carly find out about this plan and be the one to rat Dex out to Sonny? We all know in that in time Carly will come to be the focus of the Pikeman deal as well, so why not at least make her useful? Rant over.

Long time lurker, No permission to use anywhere on the internet other than here. Apologies for spelling etc, I'm frustrated and annoyed.
So you might pick up from a couple of my comments my mother wasn't the exact beacon of moderately good motherhood. I actually went NC with her 8-10 years ago when she split from her then partner. They had been a massive alcoholic with periods of dry for 16 years at that point, plus stealing her partners medications and possibly trying every recreational out there. Also possibly sleeping round at least 2 towns (I've had creeps thinking I'm her asking if Id come for a "good night" creeped me the f out). She also accused me of cheating on my now ex by hiding and sleeping with her partner when he ran away as he couldn't deal with her behaviour anymore.
Enmeshed with my eldest son (I was young and I wish this sub was around back then), she actively encouraged my youngest to get bullied by using her own nick name for them Infront of kids.
Put bluntly, the physiological and psychological damage she has done running rampant over feelings, wishes, boundaries "because I'm Nanna" has taken its toll on both myself and my youngest (21 NB AFAB). We moved 180 miles north 6 years ago to get away from it. I even paid to have my youngest's deed poll to remove some of the emotional pressure.
2 weeks ago my maternal family..... kind of imploded. My mother is one of 6, and my Nan is now in her 90's. 2 weeks ago nan had a fall, ended up in hospital. Then ended up living with my next eldest cousin L as no one was able to care for her. My moms sister J died from a combo of big C's (Cancer and Covid). One of my uncles has suddenly decided after 2 weeks to rear his head, not to "help" but try get hands on my aunts estate. Mums ended up in hospital, but with numeral problems probably bought on by her long term abuses (apparently she's been clean for 6 years, but I've heard that soooo many times I just don't know)
I'm 180 miles away, no disabled and unable to walk, and Mum has apparently got dementia comming on. Bit of a pain as she controls my dead aunts estate but I digress. All this crap going on you can guess the flying monkeys have been rearing their heads. I should patch it up with her apparently. Same people called me a horrible daughter for going NC. My brother even thought it was a good idea to try guilt trip me to come down for the funeral and see my Nan (I've face timed her, L and her Mum are JY)
Im left with the possibility in order to get my Aunt and Uncles organised for the shitstorm about to hit I may have to reconnect with my mother again. Im not sure I want to. Im sure the dementia will be a excuse for me to be forced to forgive her for all the crap shes done. I just dont know. Kinda looking for advice on how to go forward at this point because I know I will have the support of my current partner regardless of my decision.
One thing is clear though, I wont be going down there physically as its totally impractical.

Hello, first of all, I am receiving psychological support and I think I am a time traveler, and I have some evidence for it. I have been doing time travel in a way for the past 4 years, but it could be a delusion as my time travel stopped when I started taking medication. So in that sense, I am just an ordinary patient, but I have learned a lot during my travels and what I learned is evidence for me. So, how do I time travel? I don't really know, I guess it has something to do with consciousness. My brother called me one day and said, "You claimed that you saw the future before, didn't you?" which was strange because I had never made such a claim before. Then he asked me, "If you invented a time machine and someone gave it to you from the future, how would you feel?" This question surprised me because my brother is not the kind of person who would say something like that, and the question was too exaggerated for him. I told him that time travel was a silly idea, and he laughed and hung up the phone. After that, I started seeing memories of things I learned in the future but hadn't remembered before. For example, in 2005, we visited Greece and I asked the tour guide if we were going to visit the Delphi Temple. I was a child at the time and the guide asked me how I knew about it. I said that people see the future there and I wanted to see it too. At that moment, my dad turned to my brother and said, "This kid is knowledgeable." But the strange thing was that I said there was gas coming from there that allowed people to see the future. This is still a debated theory, and they did find a gas, but not until 2008, not 2005. This information was not available to me at that time, but we talked about it. I was very surprised to remember this later, so I called my brother to tell him, but he said we never had that conversation. I receive psychological support, but I have never hallucinated, and he probably just forgot, I thought to myself, but I kept remembering. I have traveled through time with memories from every point in my life. Actually, what's happening is that I'm sending my current consciousness to the past to remember things that I had forgotten. For example, in 2011, while watching Eurovision with my dad, we were chatting, and he had started to figure out my situation because I was talking about things I had learned in the future. He saw me as a prophet, and I told him that Azerbaijan would win that year, I just knew it. But I only remembered this conversation later, and he woke me up that night because Azerbaijan won. He always knew something was up with me unfortunately, he passed away in 2012, but he was my biggest evidence. I could give more examples, but I learned so much during my travels that I developed a philosophy based on that knowledge, and I would like to share it with you. Note that I have some claims that many people will experience this kind of time travel in the future, it's something that will happen. I know this. Have a good day.

Been friends with my buddy now for like 25 plus years. We used to party a lot and have fun. I remember one night he got really drunk and went home with a girl who wasn't his girlfriend. At the time they had been together for about 4-5 years. I watched him cry and freak out about for a week. Fast-forward to now and they are getting married with a kid on the way. They have been together now for 16 years I think.
Couple nights ago we were drinking and bullshitting about the past with some other buddies. He stayed at my house and we talked about growing up. And this indiscretion was brought up, by me, I had asked him if he had regrets. He mentioned that one night, then went to bed it seems that I struck a nerve. But then on my way to bed after I could hear him crying in the other room, and couldn't bring myself to go in there while we were both drunk. He was gone before I woke up. The next day we talked about how much it sucks to be hungover now that we are old. I didn't want to bring up what I heard, or even our conversation.
It's not my place to tell her, but it's obvious that he feels bad. And I understand that it could wreck everything for him, plus I'm sure we wouldn't be friends anymore after that. Also how she would feel after all this too. Being lied to for over 10 years, and everything else that comes with finding out. Now you gotta raise a kid with this man, even if they stay together or not. Do I talk to him about it? They are so good together and happy. I feel torn by the idea of what's going on. Is this one of those things we are both taking to the grave? This guy is like a brother to me, and I've become close with her over the years as well. I'd like to point out that I do not have romantic or sexual feelings about this woman, it's not an attempt to steal her from him. Does anybody have some advice for me, about ignoring this or how to talk to him.

For context, I’ve lost a baby in 2021, 2022, and no currently going through my third this year. I want to honor my 3 losses with a minimalistic tattoo. I can’t find anything that speaks to me as a reference other than a seedling 🌱 that is sprouting but it’s not quite what feels right. Any ideas other than the norm found on Pinterest or google?

I wanna start by saying that I posted the other day about smoking through mother's day and I got some really lovely and considerate replies. So indulge me for a sec with this story cos I think it's hilarious.
I smoke very little. I vape, on a low setting and I use a half-chamber so I estimate I smoke less thab 0.25g per day. Whenever I smoke with others I'm always absolutely fucked and they're basically sober.
My brother and I had to go to scatter our mum's ashes on an oak tree in a very famous forest (think Robin Hood and his merry men). Our mum was schizophrenic and had narcissistic personality disorder so, as you can imagine, she had some trouble maintaining functioning relationships. By extension, she also had trouble with us maintaining relationships with family (jealousy, paranoia) so this meant we don't really know any of them. I've probably met these people 3 times in my life (I'm 27).
So we get there and my brother, being the heaviest smoker I know says "let's smoke a joint before we meet up with the family!" and I'm like "yeah that sounds like a great and fantastic idea let's do that" (side note, I have NO inhibition with the fun button).
Then we meet with the family, it's odd and tense. They had a lot of weird issues with the date of the scattering (three had been cancelled due to very reasonable reasons such as being covid positive, etc). In particular this one absolute cow called Lorraine who is my mum's cousin made my life very difficult the last few months.
I'm absolutely fucked at this point. Pretty sure everyone knows. Even my dog can tell and she's giving me the "what the fuck mum" face.
We go up to an oak tree (not the famous one obvs) and I start to awkwardly dig a hole. It's EXTREMELY windy and there are LOTS of ashes (no-one tells you there's like 10kg of ashes). So I'm digging and it's kinda hard and I have a comically small shovel so I'm like fuck it and start to pour the ashes in. The wind picks up. I'm like fuck fuck fuck, quickly shovel some dirt over the ashes. Then, not thinking at all cos I was blasted, I stomped very hard on the grave, maybe three four times.
Audible gasp (like old Hollywood GASPPPP!) from that witch Lorraine, low chuckle from other cousin who's def a stoner and the only sane one of the bunch and my brother looks at me like 😬😬.
After that I VERY quickly wrapped that shit up. Horrible Lorraine parted with a good old "I hope you have a great life" 😂 Then I went home and bought a caravan.
Anyway, just tried my first one hitter so if this all sounds bizarre in a bad way, that's why hahaha.
Thanks for reading friends!

for context me and my exes relationship ended in flames. i don’t hold any negative feelings towards her for that, only for how she treated me in our relationship. i still look after her little brother at school, making sure he doesn’t get picked on, start fights, etc.. he has recently befriended the school assaulter. he has SA’d two of my friends and is truly creepy towards me, asking me if i’ve had sex, asking how my ex was in bed, trying to grope me, etc.. her little brothers a good kid and i have no idea what to do. i feel so bad that he doesn’t know and even more concerned bc both me and my ex have been SA’d. i don’t want him to become that kid. i want to warn her but she has her own life and i have mine. should i let her find out on her own or give her a heads up? atp any response works

I’m 20 years old and my dad passed away last year.
He was the only one making money in our family. My mom is on disability, and my twin brother and I are both in college.
He loved to travel. We always took weekend trips to the nearby beach, or visited cities during break. It was a nice getaway from all the work he was putting in to keep my family afloat.
When he passed, we had no income but wanted to travel to continue his passion of exploration. That’s when I came across this subreddit.
I started back in August, applying for my 2nd credit card and my mom’s first. To be frank, the learning curve was fairly steep, but I knew this was the fastest, cheapest, and most fun way to travel.
I am so glad to announce that I finally booked my first award flight for me and my brothers 21st birthday in October!
RIC -> BRO (south padre beach)
Roundtrip (2x people) for 31k AA miles.
Cash tickets were around $1200.
Thank you all for your incredible support and knowledge. I gotta say, I’m kinda addicted.
I look forward to booking more free travel in the future, especially a surprise one for my mom to enjoy! If anyone has any ideas, let me know :)!

TLDR: I have no idea how to set any healthy emotional boundaries between me and my mum, and I feel like I am drowning in my own emotions.
I don’t know how to put in any boundaries, I am struggling so bad with her dumping all her emotions on me.
Ever since I was a teen, my family had been going through a lot of issues. My dad cheated when I was about 12 and mum would cry to me about how sad she was, about how much she hated the AP, about how much she wished the AP would die and how much she also hated my dad. She was obsessed with stalking the AP on social media, to the point where I as a teen had to grab her phone, locked myself in a room, change her social media passwords (I knew all of hers), and then claim the profiles as mine and denied her all access to it. I did it because she just gave birth to my baby brother and would look at her phone any second my brother wasn’t crying. She had just gave birth but she refused to get any rests, just buried her head in her phone stalking the AP.
My parents had shouting matches at home, I was always the one to shield my brother from it whenever it happened. Just before she gave birth, when she found out about the affair, she was asking me if I wanted to live with her or my dad if she got a divorce. She would give me a list of chores to do, and this wasnt just put the laundry away, this was sweep the floor, then hoover, then mop the floor, then put the laundry away, then dust all furniture, then prepare food for her to come back later in the afternoon to cook. All that, as a teen.
When I was 15 I left home to another country for studying. She had consistently called me and almost every time she called she would want to vent about either her relationship with my dad, or how shit things were at home. Or she would vent about how difficult it was bringing up a young child and wished I was there to help. I don’t remember a single time I got any emotional support from her about my life. Coming from a traditional family, my dad was her first and only boyfriend. Any time I even talk to her about any boyfriends I have, it would just be “don’t get pregnant, don’t get STD” from her.
I also couldn’t talk about how stressful studying was to her, it would just stress her out and she would just tell me that if my classmates could do it, why can’t I do it too.
Since I graduated uni and joined the workforce, my schedule has been full and stress has drastically increased. But she would expect me to pick up her calls any time during the day to chat about anything she wants as if I have nothing to do,or text me and expect me to reply her. I was at my last hour of work in the office and she texted that she wanted to chat as she couldn’t sleep. I said ok. She then proceeded to tell me how her life sucks, how much she hates my dad. I just lost it on her. I had previously asked her not to tell me these things anymore, all she said was “wow, even you hate me now”
I don’t know what to do. I love her but her chats are so emotionally exhausting and it’s brining me down. Of course I absolutely do not hate her, but I feel suicidal with the way she’s guilting me into listening to all the shit that’s happening in my family and I can’t do anything about it. I don’t know what to do. I love my mum but I feel so much resentment towards her. I am at my wits end.

I'm running Chateau of Blood from Blood Brothers 2 in a few weeks with a group of mine that have gotten significantly more into roleplaying over the course of 1.5yrs 5e campaign. We've recently been experimenting with CoC--to great success--and when I heard about these books I thought they sounded like a ton of fun.
I picked this scenario because it seems to effectively capture the pulpy, early film horror that the books are going for, but it doesn't get overly silly. Tension and suspense are my favorite part of CoC, so I didn't connect too much with El Tigre, An Alien Kicked Sand in My Face (lol), or the other ones like this.
Does anyone have experience running this scenario? Reflections on it? Tips?
Here's two issues I'm thinking of in particular:

1. The scenario text makes sure you know that the only way the monsters can be killed is with silver, but the text also says there's 0 silver in the house. The premade characters aren't equipped with anything silver, as far as I can tell. Still, the scenario spells out some different conclusions, including ones where this or that boss/monster is killed with silver. I want to give my players a way to survive, but I want them to have to work for it, so I'm not interested in just arming them with silver at the beginning. Any good ideas for how to do this?
2. The scenario is more explicitly about sexuality than any I've run or played before. How do I run scenes like this without it being cringe? I anticipate that letting the players (all mid-late 20s early 30s; different genders) know in advance that sex may happen is critical to this, making sure people are down for it, etc., is one important way to prime this part of the scenario for success. Any tips for this scenario or for RPGs in general for how to deal with sexuality in this game? I think part of the hang-up for me is that the tone of the scenario is relatively spooky and serious, and in my experience in 5e, sexuality is always infused with a comedy that's less present in this scenario. So I guess my goals are: (a) keep the tone of the game consistent, (b) keep the sexual parts of the scenario fun and tense.
3. Any GM tips in general for running a session that's supposed to be as filmic as it is gamey?

I'd appreciate any insights people have!

about giving thoughtful gifts that reflect your personality and give your sibling ideas about hobbies or how to do something better. For example, I gave my sister a planner for Christmas. Before I used a planner, I would get lost in the days doing stuff like playing video games. When I got a planner, I used it to plan out how I use the days more. One morning I would write down go to the gym. Another day, I would write down join this club, the next couple of weeks I would write down prepare for this job. By showing her how I plan, I gave her a binder to show how I do things and I suggest the same thing if they would like to do so as well because it helped me.
Another less boring one. My brother bought me skii tickets for Christmas one year. On the drive there he would explain how he wishes he could just devote his entire life to skiing. I sort of saw his entire personality flow throughout the day.
What do you all think? Our wants for that Apple and that Ps5 do not matter to me as much as these kinds of gifts that bring us together or show someone a side to them.

hi! i am relatively new to machine knitting and have just bought a brother kh840. when i am knitting my knitting keeps coming apart on the right hand side but i have no idea why. the only thing that is different from when i knit at college is that i don’t have a cast on comb but i am still using weights. any help or ideas would be greatly appreciated!!!

Long story ahead.
It started when I was just a kid. I'm in my mid 30s now, but that's when it started. I'd like to preface most of this with an obligatory, to the best of my knowledge, I'm not making any of it up. Whatever definitive knowledge I think I've got is based on speculation and heresay. Nothing has identified itself at all, let alone directly. For my own sake, and the sake of related parties I'm going to edit all names from the story(ies). Especially since I'm not using a throwaway or anything. This is going right up on my personal account. I fabricate or hold back nothing this time. Ill be doing my best to cultivate as much accurate information as I can remember, but I'm getting old and don't remember as well as I used to. I can't even tell you how genuinely I consider religion, supernatural whatever, all of it to just be some stuff made up by white men to continue on with the patriarchy. I don't buy into ghosts or any of it.
It started as shadows. The feeling of being watched. My childhood wasn't that great, it was full of physical and emotional abuse from my mother. We lived in my step father's own childhood home, so it wasn't haunted by any ancient ghosts. It was a dark place though, with their history already blotting the air with it's thickness.
I guess before I really go on, I should explain that, too.
My step father was twenty something years older than my mom. So he was in his fifties during my teen years. He wasn't bad, he wasn't great. I guess technically speaking he was a bad step father. We didn't have much of a relationship, let alone a even bad "fatheson" one.
The home itself was an old New England starter home. It was small, as far as modern houses go. Three bedrooms total. One bath, a large basement spanned the entire length and width. By the time we had met him and moved in, he had already mostly paid the house off, buying it from his own parents. Outside of four years in the coast guard, He, his brother, and older sister had all lived there(while they moved away, he stayed)
Their family dynamic was dated, and weird. His mom and dad were the type to call each other "mom and dad" respectively. His sister, even after joining the navy and marrying an officer was required to maintain a joint bank account with her dad so he could have uptime decision making. She had her own creepy qualities when we'd visit. She collected Barbies, never opening them. That in itself isn't weird. Hell, I collect action figures myself. But she had a voice for some of her favorites, and they'd talk amongst themselves if she was in the room. My Step father's brother, was actually an inventor and invented something I can't remember anymore. He wasn't Bezos rich, but had a nice house in Florida when we'd visit. Mom and Step dad both always warned me though to be careful. He was on a lot of drugs.
My Step father himself was a weird man. He was never taught hygiene. And he was never really nurtured or loved, and unfortunately it showed. He didn't know how to do those things, either. He was a nice guy, but had no idea what to do from there. He grew up in the fifties, and as a kid, I just imagined that's why he was the way he was. From a different time.
The legacy of their combined tragic legacy lived on in a ghost that I do believe was in the realitively new house. We lived there total for twelve years with him, however the time is broken up into two different six year stints. Half way through, my mom for whatever reason, moved us out. We lived in a one room efficiency apartment together for exactly one year, before they reconciled and moved back in together. While we were moved out - we adopted a stray cat. Well, he adopted us. We actually found him the very first day we left him on our own. He was a white cat, nearly completely blind. He was just outside our motel door. We took him in with us. He was actually great. We named him Doofus, because he was kinda fun and goofy. He stayed with us the entire year departure, and was reluctantly allowed back with us.
My Step father was a dog person. Awkwardly so. He loved his dog(s). To the point where I'd still say he more made out with them, as a form of affection. It wasn't okay. I'm sure of that. Let me clear something up, while I say all of these negative things about him. It's not like that. While we don't have any sort of relationship now, I believe that's more us both healing from my mother more so than each other. But anyway, let's keep going!
Within a year after introducing the new cat into the house, he had himself quite the affinity for the basement. It was cool in the summer, and kept itself warm enough to be down there without freezing in the winter. It was my home base as a teenage boy in the late 90s, early 00s with AOL internet access. Doofus would often lounge around, and we'd leave him to his own devices while down there. He never disappeared and always came running when we'd shake his bowl of food. That first summer back though, we were, even my step father was, convinced he had worked his magic on a neighborhood feline friend, and had a litter of kittens down there. It wasn't the mousy cries of fresh babies. Certainly a meow that wasn't his though. We thought maybe he had found his way into the walls, or was simply stuck. Inevitably one day it happened with him fast asleep on his window perch in the kitchen. Finally my step dad fessed up what comes to be an important story.
When he was a kid, himself and his younger sister, found a cat. They, with some kind of sitcom understanding of how the world works, brought it home and tried to hide it in the basement to keep. Their father found it and brutalized the animal to punish them and simply disposed of it like it was nothing.
I can't stress it enough how… from that point on, things changed. The meowing from the basement stopped. Forever. It never happened again. However I never felt alone down there again, honestly.
I want to take another brief intermission to point out that at the current point in my life, I've been in therapy and anger management both. I haven't spoken to my mother in over seven years, and I'm barely any contact with my family at all. I had a very good therapist that helped me through my trauma with my mom as a child that continued into adulthood. Most of the information I'm going to share here, and continue to share here are things that modern medicine and science have since explained away. Sort of. I didn't just feel not alone while in the basement of my childhood home anymore, I felt actively pursued. Someone wasn't just always watching, they wanted to be known. I also started to experience night terrors that felt lucid.
I eventually moved out as soon as I could, and moved to Florida. Unfortunately my abusive mother followed. However, years passed from there. Through circumstance, I maintained a relationship with her. I was young and dumb, and didn't know how to set or enforce boundaries. Anyway.
Fast forward to my mid 20s. I had just ended a long term relationship with what was essentially my first "real-life" girlfriend. Things went sour the way things do when you're young, and I ended up moving back in with my mom and her now new husband. It was a very short stay, but while there I fell on hard times with my health. That's where the story here really takes an interesting turn.
Their house wasn't just bad, it was absolutely the worst. It was literally just a shack. The way some of those poor places in Florida are really like. I was home alone. I did have my own private bedroom. It was small, couldn't even hold my bed and the dresser. There was no door. It was an old curtain pinned to the outside wall. The illusion of privacy. It all went from easy enough to explain, to outright bonkers that day.
I was in bed. Doorway clearly visible. The sheet had been pinned to the space above it so it stood open for me to come and go easily. In the doorway was a teenage girl. Shoulder length brown hair. Conservatively dressed, yet modern. She didn't speak. It was over. She was gone.
The same girl came to me two or three days later, same setting. Just standing in the doorway. She seemed far less relaxed. Even agitated. She was holding something but I couldn't make out what. Whatever it was just wouldn't manifest, but it was important to her. Whatever that item was I can't help but feel like it'd all make sense now, but who knows. She stayed for nearly a full five minutes, fidgeting eithcthecitem before leaving. It was only a couple of more days before she came back again, but wasn't alone. An older man. Older then I was at the time, at least. He seemed like her father. They were bickering and fighting about something and she, in her tantrum disappeared. But he stayed and said nothing to me. He made no motion or charades. He did however glare at me this empty, menacing eyes and then vanished.
I didn't see the girl again until the night before I moved out. By this point, I had been drained of the small savings I did have. I was literally starving. Stealing food from Walmart just to keep myself going. I had aloowedcmy mother to drain me of everything. The apparition came to me that night, and the sensation was different. She glowed a warm orange tint. it felt like we were together forever. She still never spoke to me, but shared knowledge. She told me things about myself I didn't know yet. Actual, real life things that wouldn't come to fruition for over a decade, but they have indeed come true. Not even as a warning. It was a parlor trick to prove her abilities to me. I didn't see her again, for nearly 12 years.
It was last year she came back. I wasn't startled, she communicated like we were old friends. By just, giving me the information. I had probably six or eight months prior to that, reconnected with an old friend. The girl told me matter of fact my, "reach out. They aren't okay." Which was weird because we were talking mostly daily at that point again. I knew things weren't perfect but not being okay raised alarm bells. I reached out to find out their dog had passed just that morning. Again not a huge flex of their ability, just enough to keep me hooked.
I was bewildered at this point. I knew nothing of psychics or spirits or demons. Outside of what I seen on TV of course. I didn't even believe in that shit, but I love reading and learning.
Because of the history with my newly rekindled friendship, it was actually my childhood crush - the love of my life. That was actually the context of us becoming friends again. I wanted to work on fixing the things between us so we could be there again. The situation felt ripe by description for either Dr. Phil, or Lilith. Though I didn't know what that was even supposed to mean.
My own research and learning has brought me here, to you. This sub. This long story of ghost cats, and dark places, the meddling of what I thought was Lilith, but I believe to be something else entirely.
You see I've reached out to the girl who manifests. She hasn't been back, but I can still feel her around. So I've worked up the courage to confront her. I ask for identification, and my ears fill with this droning white noise and it'll eventually tell me that shes Lilith, but I'm not convinced. But from the difficulty in expression, neither are they. I believe it's something that latched onto my belief at first of it being Lilith and won't let up on that. I do believe it's "male" in nature. Has a knack for tricks, and knows that pretending to be something it isn't is bad for him, so he's trying to keep it under cover. I also don't think it's here to help me in any capacity. It clearly wants something either from me, personally, or is trying to use me as a vessel.
I think something masquerading now as Lilith has been involved in my life from the house I grew up. It didn't leave me alone, it learned to be less obvious and scary outright. But it's here. It's always here.

[F4A] Fantasy Foundation, Highly Adaptable Scene where the sky is the limit!~
{Hiya! This is an older scene I used to do, so it's not the best prompt but I can promise you it's highly adaptable! I love taking this scene in as many directions as possible so if you have an idea or a character you'd like to fit in please just add it in your message! I'm extremely open minded, and love talking things out, so please, feel free to message me even if all you have is a theme or concept you'd like to chase after!~}
The sun had finally set on the town stained red with the putrid, stagnant blood of the hours before, an atmosphere that should have lead to an painfully uncomfortable tension and sense of dread hanging over the town. The small town located fae from any major city, located all the way out in the boonies, the people of the town had enjoyed an almost perfect existence away from the bustle and the politics of the kingdoms powerhouse cities, with the closest the town ever getting to weighing in on global events was the ever frequent platoon of troops appearing to scout and draft new recruits for the kings army, yet the town knew that if this was the price to pay for their simple way of life, it'd be one they'd gladly take. This was not to say the town was free of problems, with it's own sub culture and a plethora of races calling the town home, it wasn't a perfect society but it was theirs nonetheless.
However, peace in times like these never trully lasted long, as ambushes on traders and muggings became a part of their everyday life, it was only long before the culprits became dissatisfied with the scraps they could manage to snatch from the various merchants, and set their sights on sieging the town itself. Even though a bandit with a conscience made it into the town square to give the people warning, their was only so much a town with not enough true soldiers and barely enough men to put every weapon they had to use. Even though this thought would be clear to any outsider or even any onlooker with any sense of logic, the town bowed their heads and banded together for the oncoming slaughter. Barricades were set up in the town square and every person who either couldn't hold a weapon or couldn't afford to be lost in battle held up in the middle of the town offering whatever aid they could as the bandits finally descended on the town.
The young women dressed in white and adorned with intricate and almost hypnotic golden lining was to no surprise to anyone, not from the small town. Ophelia herself had been raised by the church, with not a single memory left of anything that came before her time as part of the doctrine, with the church and the faith being all she had ever known since such a young age. The girl had been raised as a part of a programme, belonging to a very specific sect of the church to raise a new generation of exemplary figures to lead and carry out the will of their lord throughout the land, being not only well versed in every religious text and passage their was, but also being trained in a passable level of combat along with the church's own ever elusive branch of holy magic.
Even though she had never had much choice in the matter, Ophelia's fairh was pure and unwavering, never having had it brought into question, and it was this sole fact that allowed her to rise through the church swiftly as an example of what true faith and commitment could lead too. Her faith led her to becoming a strong willed, fiery member of the cloth who's use of holy miracles and incantations could scarcely be rivalled by only the bishops themselves of the church, allowing her to join a sub-section of the church known as the inner-choir, a rank similar to that of a cardinal priest in status yet without the title itself, allowing the general public to acknowledge them as pillars of the order but not all in the church could say the same.
Ophelia had only spent the lesser part of a week with the town, with it being one of the few stops on her journey that she was specifically told to take note of and assess the town on a more personal and real level than any real census could. It was the kindof task that she found herself being given on top of any other work that her brothers and sisters of the clergy were tasked with. Not that she ever complained, having lived a sheltered life being raised by the church in to the shining beacon of light that the world could see her as.
The town had welcomed her with open arms, allowing her to take refuge in their chapel with everyone offering a warm welcome to the young girl. It was never part of her job, but she always made a point to talk and introduce herself to as many of the town's people as she could, hearing their struggles and doing everything in her power to aid them and pass on whatever blessings she had at her disposal. She was the talk of the town, and she loved to hear the stories and fables of the towns culture, becoming absorbed and obsessed with learning and hearing as much about their own little secluded world as she could.
It would be hard to say that the young girl being there on that day, lending her aid in both combat and healing of the wounded, didn't have a drastic effect on the outcome of the day. Her prowess allowed the fatalities to stay low and for the towns rag-tag militia to keep fighting until the ruthless bandits retreated for now, leaving there casualties in the streets to the roars of celebration from the town. Now, even on a day that should be treated solemnly and respectfully, the entire town was in celebration over their survival and the grit they had shown today. People took to the streets, the fields and most importantly the taverns to let the world know that they would not be crushed that easily.
Now Ophelia sat, at a table with her travel companion and bodyguard, a man who was there more for company than anything else as the table top was cluttered with a plethora of drinks and plates of food that had been bought for her, thanks from the town as she hungrily wolves down bowl after bowl to bring her energy back so she can return to tending the wounded before she collapses for the day. She barely got a minute to enjoy herself, between bites groups of people at a time would come up to thank her and offer her tokens and praise, as she gladly accepted their kind words, giving her work that feeling of purpose that she had always strived for.
The only thing that bothered the girl was a new face in the tavern, someone that she couldn't place from her walks of the town, congregation or even the battle that happened prior, which confused the girl greatly as she felt the eyes on her every now and then. The face dissapeared eventually as she shook her head, returning to her food as her bodyguard gets up to speak to a few of the men that he had met earlier, as the girl is now left alone to her devices as she continues with her food, her mind still trying to place the face she had just seen.

{Hiya! This is an older scene I used to do, so it's not the best prompt but I can promise you it's highly adaptable! I love taking this scene in as many directions as possible so if you have an idea or a character you'd like to fit in please just add it in your message! I'm extremely open minded, and love talking things out, so please, feel free to message me even if all you have is a theme or concept you'd like to chase after!~}
The sun had finally set on the town stained red with the putrid, stagnant blood of the hours before, an atmosphere that should have lead to an painfully uncomfortable tension and sense of dread hanging over the town. The small town located fae from any major city, located all the way out in the boonies, the people of the town had enjoyed an almost perfect existence away from the bustle and the politics of the kingdoms powerhouse cities, with the closest the town ever getting to weighing in on global events was the ever frequent platoon of troops appearing to scout and draft new recruits for the kings army, yet the town knew that if this was the price to pay for their simple way of life, it'd be one they'd gladly take. This was not to say the town was free of problems, with it's own sub culture and a plethora of races calling the town home, it wasn't a perfect society but it was theirs nonetheless.
However, peace in times like these never trully lasted long, as ambushes on traders and muggings became a part of their everyday life, it was only long before the culprits became dissatisfied with the scraps they could manage to snatch from the various merchants, and set their sights on sieging the town itself. Even though a bandit with a conscience made it into the town square to give the people warning, their was only so much a town with not enough true soldiers and barely enough men to put every weapon they had to use. Even though this thought would be clear to any outsider or even any onlooker with any sense of logic, the town bowed their heads and banded together for the oncoming slaughter. Barricades were set up in the town square and every person who either couldn't hold a weapon or couldn't afford to be lost in battle held up in the middle of the town offering whatever aid they could as the bandits finally descended on the town.
The young women dressed in white and adorned with intricate and almost hypnotic golden lining was to no surprise to anyone, not from the small town. Ophelia herself had been raised by the church, with not a single memory left of anything that came before her time as part of the doctrine, with the church and the faith being all she had ever known since such a young age. The girl had been raised as a part of a programme, belonging to a very specific sect of the church to raise a new generation of exemplary figures to lead and carry out the will of their lord throughout the land, being not only well versed in every religious text and passage their was, but also being trained in a passable level of combat along with the church's own ever elusive branch of holy magic.
Even though she had never had much choice in the matter, Ophelia's fairh was pure and unwavering, never having had it brought into question, and it was this sole fact that allowed her to rise through the church swiftly as an example of what true faith and commitment could lead too. Her faith led her to becoming a strong willed, fiery member of the cloth who's use of holy miracles and incantations could scarcely be rivalled by only the bishops themselves of the church, allowing her to join a sub-section of the church known as the inner-choir, a rank similar to that of a cardinal priest in status yet without the title itself, allowing the general public to acknowledge them as pillars of the order but not all in the church could say the same.
Ophelia had only spent the lesser part of a week with the town, with it being one of the few stops on her journey that she was specifically told to take note of and assess the town on a more personal and real level than any real census could. It was the kindof task that she found herself being given on top of any other work that her brothers and sisters of the clergy were tasked with. Not that she ever complained, having lived a sheltered life being raised by the church in to the shining beacon of light that the world could see her as.
The town had welcomed her with open arms, allowing her to take refuge in their chapel with everyone offering a warm welcome to the young girl. It was never part of her job, but she always made a point to talk and introduce herself to as many of the town's people as she could, hearing their struggles and doing everything in her power to aid them and pass on whatever blessings she had at her disposal. She was the talk of the town, and she loved to hear the stories and fables of the towns culture, becoming absorbed and obsessed with learning and hearing as much about their own little secluded world as she could.
It would be hard to say that the young girl being there on that day, lending her aid in both combat and healing of the wounded, didn't have a drastic effect on the outcome of the day. Her prowess allowed the fatalities to stay low and for the towns rag-tag militia to keep fighting until the ruthless bandits retreated for now, leaving there casualties in the streets to the roars of celebration from the town. Now, even on a day that should be treated solemnly and respectfully, the entire town was in celebration over their survival and the grit they had shown today. People took to the streets, the fields and most importantly the taverns to let the world know that they would not be crushed that easily.
Now Ophelia sat, at a table with her travel companion and bodyguard, a man who was there more for company than anything else as the table top was cluttered with a plethora of drinks and plates of food that had been bought for her, thanks from the town as she hungrily wolves down bowl after bowl to bring her energy back so she can return to tending the wounded before she collapses for the day. She barely got a minute to enjoy herself, between bites groups of people at a time would come up to thank her and offer her tokens and praise, as she gladly accepted their kind words, giving her work that feeling of purpose that she had always strived for.
The only thing that bothered the girl was a new face in the tavern, someone that she couldn't place from her walks of the town, congregation or even the battle that happened prior, which confused the girl greatly as she felt the eyes on her every now and then. The face dissapeared eventually as she shook her head, returning to her food as her bodyguard gets up to speak to a few of the men that he had met earlier, as the girl is now left alone to her devices as she continues with her food, her mind still trying to place the face she had just seen.