I've already seen 2 posts about Xikers here already, but I would also like to add my thoughts about their debut EP, Doorbell Ringing. Allow me to start by saying that I am an Atiny who is mainly a Hongjoong bias(with everyone else killing me every second), so when I heard that Hongjoong helped produce this album, I could not be more excited. This album not only makes me excited for Xikers future, but also Hongjoong's future as a producer. With that out of the way, let's talk about the songs, shall we?
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1. The Secret of Tricky(9/10): Xikers are continuing the tradition that Ateez has of having good intros. The beat is amazing and it sets up the story of Xikers being given powers by a force called Tricky who only wants chaos. Not much else to say cause its just a intro.
   
2. Doorbell Ringing(9/10): I really enjoyed this song. Sumin's verse is fire and Yechan is starting his reign of terror on this album. The bridge was also amazing as well. However, this is currently the song that I've listened to the least, but its not because its bad. The following songs, in my opinion, are just better.
   
3. Tricky House(9.75/10): You would think after seeing them perform this song so many times, I'd get sick of it. I have not and that is a testament to this song. The music video is insanely creative with Xikers being the teasing pranksters and messing with the office worker the whole video. Junmin's "We're playing like this" lives in my head and so does the back breaking choreo. All in all, great title track, will play this all week.
   
4. Dynamic(9.8/10): The only reason that this song is not a 10 is that it is not a full song. Rock is a genre that I adore and seeing this sound on an album gives me hope for a full track like this(hopefully title, please KQ). Not much else to say again, but then this leads to...
   
5. Rockstar(20/10): First of my two favorite songs on this album. This song makes me want to run through a brick wall and take over the world. Minjae's deep ass voice on the drop, Yechan once again killing me, and Seeun's line "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7" live in my head rent free. This song getting an MV is not a want, its a need.
   
6. Xikey(30/10): My other favorite song on this album, its so weird but its good. Minjae screams Xikers at the top of his lungs like he means it and the entire song is them declaring that they are going to take over the world(I believe that they are going to in time). BUT THE BEAT CHANGE?! WHAT WAS THAT? It was so good and somehow wasn't jarring to the overall flow of the song. This song is honestly song of the year and I can't wait to see more performances of it.
   
7. Oh My Gosh(15/10): Ending of the album is another banger. Hunter ruled the chorus for me and it was just a pleasant experience. Highlight of the song is the bridge. The vocal line(Hyunwoo, Junghoon, and Jinsik I believe?) sang extremely well here and it is the perfect song to close it out.
   

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Conclusion: Every song on this album was a different flavor of intense. I haven't seen videos on line distribution or lyrics yet so I'm not entirely sure who sings what except for the rap line. Speaking of the rap line, they carried the songs for me. Minjae, Sumin, and Yechan are forces to be reckoned with(Yechan especially I think KQ has a thing for powerhouse maknaes). All in all, if this is just their debut, who knows what these 10 tricksters have in store for us.

I was supposed to write this up a few days ago but I've been ill, so... yeah, sorry I'm late XD
It's been an interesting experience, to say to least. Overall, I think I may have tried to cut out too much at once because I ended up breaking a good amount of the rules I set. Although to be completely fair to myself, I got the flu halfway in, and it's way preferable to binge youtube than just lay around feeling like shit all day.
Sickness aside, here's some things I noticed:

1. I stopped caring about social media goings on pretty quickly. After just a few days, in fact.
2. 99% of online friends won't bother to keep in touch. This has been a bit of a hard pill to swallow for me, but for all the people online who claimed to be my friends and threw around "we love you" and "you're my best friend", almost none of them tried to contact me.
3. My brain was pretty quick to replace social media scrolling with gaming and binge watching. Again, I spent half the detox sick, so I'm not gonna flog myself for it, and I'd honestly rather be playing pokemon than scrolling a feed, but that's what ended up happening, and it's something I'll need to account for in the future.
4. The internet feels incredibly superficial to me now. Maybe I've just become jaded, but when I want back and took another look through one of my accounts, it was all just the same old shit. The same people posting 12,000 memes a day, the same political opinions being screeched, the same old clowns starting drama, so on and so forth. It feels so... shallow.
5. I think my attention span might be coming back a little bit. Gonna keep tabs on that.

I think it was a good experience for me, even if I ended up dropping the ball pretty hard, and I wanna continue tapering things off. Once I'm more recovered, I'm gonna close some accounts I never use and seriously reconsider the people I hang out with. One way or another I'm gonna get my life back.

where can I find a secondhand bakfiet in amsterdam
Finding a secondhand bakfiets (cargo bike) in Amsterdam might require a bit more effort, but it's certainly possible. Here are some places where you can look for a used bakfiets:

1. Marktplaats.nl: This Dutch online marketplace is an excellent starting point for finding secondhand bakfietsen. Browse through the listings or post a "wanted" ad to increase your chances of finding the perfect cargo bike.
2. Facebook Marketplace and Groups: Search for local Amsterdam-based buy/sell groups, as well as the Facebook Marketplace, where people might be selling used bakfietsen.
3. Bicycle Shops: Some specialized bicycle shops in Amsterdam sell secondhand cargo bikes. You can visit or contact local stores like WorkCycles, Het Zwarte Fietsenplan, or De Fietsfabriek to inquire about their used bakfiets inventory.
4. Weekend Markets: As mentioned in the previous answer, you can visit various weekend markets in Amsterdam, such as Waterlooplein Market or IJ-Hallen. While there's no guarantee you'll find a bakfiets, it's worth checking.
5. Online Forums and Expats Communities: Websites like Expatica, Iamsterdam, or Amsterdam Expats often have forums or classified sections where people sell their used items, including bakfietsen.
6. Word of Mouth: Let your friends, colleagues, and acquaintances know that you're looking for a secondhand bakfiets. Networking might lead to someone who's selling or knows someone who is.

Remember to inspect the bakfiets carefully before purchasing and ensure it's in good working condition. If you're not familiar with cargo bikes, consider bringing along a knowledgeable friend to help you evaluate the bike's condition.

Ok, so rewatching ATLA, I started thinking about the chapter about Guru Pathik and the Chakras and ended up with a theory.
We were told the Fire Chakra was blocked by shame, and powered by willpower. Iroh also told Zuko that pride was the source of shame, and that true humility was its opposite.
With that in mind, I ask: did Zuko have his Fire Chakra blocked for 5/6 of the series ?
My argument is the following. Zuko was a late bloomer, which means that his bending was developed later than expected, but has nothing to do with it being higher or lower. By being the first born of the FN Prince, him being a late bloomer was a shame for his nation, and for that his father, grandfather and the Fire Sages doubted him since his birth. That means that when he developed his bending the damage was already done. Zuko felt shame since he can remember, and he tries to counter it with his pride, which only increases that shame and that causes his inner turmoil, weakening his firebending and preventing him to master Lightning bending. Only when he finally snaps and decides to join the Gaang, learning the true drive of firebending, he cleansed his fire chakra and developed his true potential. That would explain why he manages to bend Dragons Fire only seeing it once, or why he is the first firebender to properly fly with jet propulsion without Comet amp and carrying the Earth King (as Azula never properly flies). This doesn’t mean he has a higher potential than Azula, because Azula’s may be the highest potential ever seen in a firebender; but that Zuko’s potential was higher than we thought. In the end, he still is product of that prophecy of powerful rulers born from the combination of the Avatar’s and the Fire Lord’s bloodlines.

Elixir:
First of all, elixir is the most scarce resource you have. You will start out uppgrading everything you come across. But, while going through the first 3 (maybe even 4) mines of the event try to keep track of which mineshafts are useful to you, as some of them might just be a waste of elixir. For these long events, even the first mineshafts, amethyst, citrine etc. will need to be uppgraded to roughly lvl 9 by the time you get to mine 5. This means that you will have to spend tons of elixir on just getting these automated.
As an example, if it turns out that lets say agate is completely useless (hypotheticaly, I don't know if this is true or not), both as a steping stone and for the sake of income further on. Not spending elixir needed to get this upgraded to level 7-9 (for automation) is going to save you tons of elixir that could be spent better elsewhere. Usually if you make it to mine 5 you will have rare cards that will need 10k elixir to be uppgraded, a lot better having these than another useless mineshaft that contributes a fraction of your income.
​
Rocks:
Common question is if you should mine all the rocks before moving to the next mine. The answer kinda depends. You can't go back to older mines, so mining all the keys is an absolute necessity.
Chests are also very important, they contain important resources, mainly cards and elixir but also crowns.
When it comes to the normal rocks (in this event they are hay bales) they are usually never very high level and are therefor (in my opinion) worth mining since they can containt chests and elixir.
In general mining the elixir rocks will be worth it. BUT, elixir rocks often turn out to be some of the most time consuming rocks throughout the event. I'm currently in mine 2 and can see that there is a lvl 15 rock at the end which is likely to take a long time to get through. So spending your elixir wisely is also going to mean you can skip large rocks like these and still be fine when you get to the later mines.
Crownrocks, these will to most players be a waste of time. While having a high placement in the leaderboard can give some of the largest rewards available from events, very few players can place 1st-10th, where the rewards actually start becoming juicy. So not wasting time on large crownrocks is also going to save you a lot time that could be better spent mining keys towards the last day. (If you plan to spend loads of gems/time on the event, you can probably ignore this last paragraph)

Few days ago I wrote a post that refers to the Jungian concept of Ego Death, generally considered as a spiritual fairytale. This is somewhat a naturalistic perspective on explaining this phenomenology and it is rooted in dual-aspect monism. Here's a short summary of my post which will be linked at the end.
Since consciousness research has recently been on the rise, we've encountered some methods and ways of thinking that could hopefully help us prove that many similar "spiritual" experiences aren't made up, but can rather be thought of as physical processes in the field of consciousness that we humans with our limited capacities try to put in clumsy words.
I am referring to several theories known foremost in physics (which seemingly offers us tools that can be used to describe consciousness) - those are hyperbolic strings (from strings theory), and as a consequence of a change in their manifold they can be measured via hyperbolic geometry. Next thing to know is that consciousness is thought of as a topological pocket/bubble within an electromagnetic field (this is QRI paradigm - www.qri.org) , which I am hypothetically taking to be seen not just as a bubble, but a molecule of consciousness that can also independently act like a molecule!
The funny part is that if you take cymatics for example (if you don't know what it is you can Google it and literally just watch the first video, shortly: vibrations create a geometric shape) it shows us that music resonance can be translated into geometry. What if this way of observing *resonance of our consciousness* will help us understand those subjective feelings of loss of identity and fundamental changes in the psyche?
Of course, ontology in this case is not materialistic. I hope materialists here will not eat me for breakfast.
What are your thoughts? Does it make sense? :)
9. Phenomenology of “Psychic Death” as Molecular and Geometric Docking – Things I Wasn't Supposed to Talk About (thingsiwasntsupposedtotalkabout.com)
I am more than happy to hear criticism and further research/reading suggestions. I am aware that E. Weinstein hates String Theory but it seems more like an emotional reaction.

I'm happy to announce that I finished my book now I'm translating it into English.
You can see more on my Wattpad.
Andheim - Full Book English version - Alicja Burek - Wattpad
I encourage you guys If you like the book to share it on your social media. So more people can like it :)
Northeast of the city of Lira. The Great Battle was underway. The Kingdom of Andaroln and the Kingdom of Ithrandil fought each other. Humans vs High Elves.
On the dried, trampled grass of the meadow, two armies were advancing on each other. In the cloudless southern sun of Andaroln summer. Human soldiers, under the banner of a golden sword crossed with a lightning bolt in the crown crest, tried to maintain formation. Armed with swords, shields, and chainmail, they fended off a frontal attack by the silver-skinned Elves, who wore emerald armor that looked as if it were made of cut stone. Compared to them, people looked like a random collection. They had no such armor, and some had none at all.
In addition, the Elves possessed terrible weapons. The Ents broke through the ranks, heedless of any resistance. Trees bred to become ruthless machines powered by magic. Feeling no pain and knowing no mercy. They assume an almost humanoid form during combat. Arms with roots instead of fingers grabbed and tore people apart. The Andarolians knew only two ways to defeat them. A strong mage was needed, and that was the problem, unlike the Elves, many people didn't know magic. Secon way was to bombard the Ent with so many incendiary arrows that they start to burn. And hidden in the crown of the tree, the Elf that was controlling it was burning alive. The archers kept behind the infantry were important, they supported the soldiers fighting in front.
Andaroln was famous for its cavalry, but it was useless against the Ents. Horses were afraid of moving trees. Except for the armored horses the Paladins rode. They weren't even afraid of lightning. For this is what their fearless riders wield. In full silver plate armour, consisting of visors, shoulder pads, breastplates, gloves, and shin guards. With blue tabards with a white lightning bolt in a circle on the chest. Armed with long lances and a triangular two-color shield. They surrounded the elven army and charged at it, surrounded by an aura of lightning that struck enemies within range.
Among the Andarolian troops on the right flank was Wyndelf. This Andaroln Captain in his twenties, he fought in the front row with his two-handed bastard sword. He was a massive tall man with a long face, a low forehead, a large, slightly curved nose, and a thin mouth. He had a fair complexion, broad shoulders, stern green eyes, and shoulder-length disheveled dark brown hair. A short beard covered his face. He wore a steel hauberk over a leather waistcoat, simple black canvas trousers, and leather boots.
This wasn't his first battle. He remembered the words of the knight training him and the other recruits. "The elves know magic and are cunning, tire them out to defeat them." That's what he was doing, starting a sword fight. He forced the Elf to parry with quick swings and finally finished him off. All around were the screams of the wounded, the dying of the dead. As far as the eye could see, there were either enemies or allies. They were outnumbered. This battle was fought by the largest army in Andaroln's history, 60,000 strong. There were only twenty-five thousand elves.
On a hill nearby sat the Queen of the Elves, commanding and casting terrifying spells. Fireballs the size of great cauldrons hit the Andaroln soldiers like great boulders. They exploded, killing and severely burning those lucky enough to survive. Wyndelf kept silently praying to Anedothon that one didn't hit him. He didn't know how many elves he had already defeated. He was a better swordsman than them, but when one had magic he could only dodge and wait until he ran out of magical energy or was hit by an allied arrow.
Another hit him. Armed with a curved sword and shield. Both hands are busy. That meant he had no hand to cast. Wyndelf quickly dismissed the thought, however, as fire ignited on the curved blade. Yellow eyes shone from behind the visor. He moved forward. The Andarolian could only parry. In the brief exchange of blows, he sensed an opportunity. He jumped back and, using the greatsword's reach, aimed at the legs not covered by the shield. He tripped his opponent. He dropped the sword from his hand, and Wyndelf finished him off with another blow.
After defeating him, he realized that he was alone. Fortunately, there are not many enemies on the right flank either. The three elves gathered around the elf. They were covering her, apparently she was their commander. She was tired and had to sit down. They drew their swords and rushed towards him. Each with a curved short blade in one hand. And the other was nothing. Did they know magic? They surrounded him. They were about to attack simultaneously, giving Wyndelf no chance, when he moved forward and with a confident thrust of his sword felled the first elf. The other ran up to him, but his range was too short. A bastard's long sword sliced through his elven armor. The third looked uncertain. Escaped.
He was left alone with the tired Elf. She stood up, leaning on a long curved sword. Yellow eyes also shone from behind the veil of the helmet. She was tall, equal to his height, and he was not short. She raised her sword and charged at him. He was ready to make the attack. However, she stopped deadpan. She directed her hand towards the ground. Roots sprouted from the ground beneath him and encircled him. He tried to break away. She was getting closer. He reached for his belt knife. He cut the part. He released his sword and was completely free. He rushed at her. She raised the blade. She parried the first blow, and so did the second. she was backing up. He swung a third time. However, she stumbled over the corpse of the dead Elf, thus avoiding the blow. The helmet of elven metal fell from her head, and a face appeared to Wyndelf, a beautiful round one with prominent cheekbones. He was about to hit her, but hesitated.
He looked at her more. She was young as an elf. He saw fear in her big yellow eyes. Her forehead was smooth, her mouth dark and wide. Lush, shoulder-length, light green hair. The Andarolian was speechless. He had never seen someone so beautiful. He was standing over her with his two-handed sword raised. They stared at each other like that for a moment.
Then slowly the elf stood up. Without making sudden movements. She took two steps back, turned and ran towards the forest. Wyndelf stared after her for a moment, then shook himself. He looked at the hill. He could have been an easy target. He was alone on the right flank. However, the Elf Queen had other concerns.
Five Paladins rode towards her to challenge her. In the center is the Grand Master of Thelarix. A man of medium height in his sixties. A thin man with a long face, high forehead, prominent nose, thin lips and gray tousled hair. His large blue eyes were constantly glowing with a stern look. A fine stubble covered his face. Armed like the rest of the Paladins, except for the lack of a visor covering his head.
He was going to meet the Queen. They went up the hill. The Elf Queen sat on her horse, accompanied by her bodyguards, and measured the people with a cold gaze. She wore emerald armor like the other elves. On her head, however, instead of a helmet, she wore a golden crown studded with rubies. She was beautiful but her face was cold. She had silver Elven skin and orange gleaming eyes.
— So the humans sent their best warrior... a grey-haired old man? — she asked contemptuously..
— Don't be overconfident, Elf witch. — Thelarix answered her and pointed the lance skyward.
Lightning burst from the cloudless sky and struck the lance's tip. Lightning surrounded the Paladin. Constantly dancing all around him. It was five out of five. The Paladins accompanying the master of the order rushed at the Queen's bodyguards. They tried unsuccessfully to summon the roots to defend themselves. But that didn't help. The queen was amazed at how quickly her bodyguards were dealt with. However, she smiled when it became clear that other Paladins would not interfere in her duel with the old man. They stood on either side watching carefully. The elf created spears of fire and rushed at the old man. Thelarix charged at her, pointing lances at her. They clashed. The fiery spear shattered against the plate armor that surrounded the lightning bolt. The lance pierced the Queen's chest right through. She hung on a polearm. Her dead-open eyes were startled.
Seeing this, the elves broke down and started to retreat to the east. Thelarix let go of the lances. He dismounted and looked at the Crown. He took her hand. He sensed an unimaginable amount of magical energy from it.
— It's a powerful artifact. How could someone with something like that get defeated so easily? — he thought.
He got back on his horse with the prey. And he went down the hill. He looked at the man leaning on a long two-handed sword. Around him, a dozen dead elves. He was amazed. He drove up to him. There was an uproar nearby.
— Soldiers gather here — cried Thelarix loudly.
The Andarolians began to gather. Countless eyes were now on Wyndelf
— What's your name boy? — the Master of the Order asked quietly.
— Wyndelf Tarronghill — replied the Man.
Then the Paladin Commander spoke loudly to everyone — This Wyndelf Tarronghill here is a brave warrior, he fought tirelessly today for us and all of Andalorn, he deserves the glory, from now on he will be known as the Berserker of Lira —.
There were cheers and applause. Wyndelf was surprised. After a while, the crowd parted. On a beautiful silver horse rode a man whom everyone knew. King Killrog. A man in his forties, of medium height, massive, with a serious handsome face, broad shoulders, low forehead, small nose, blue eyes, stubble and short brown hair. He wore plate armor with the golden Crest of Andaroln on his chest and a blue cape with gold trimmings thrown over him. On his head was a golden crown studded with sapphires.
Wyndelf knelt as the King rode up. Thelarix dismounted and did the same. So are the soldiers.
— It's a great day — Killrog began. — We have defeated the greatest Elven army yet, today we have recaptured Lira, and soon we will recapture the rest of our lands, we will not rest until we drive the filthy Elves away — he said loudly and the crowd cheered.
Thelarix showed him the crown. The king took it and lifted it up — We have their Queen's Crown, their end is near.. —

An IRA can be a smart, tax advantaged way to save for retirement if you want to save more than your workplace retirement plan annual contribution limit allows, or you just want added tax benefits for your savings. But it can be a challenge to decide which IRA is best for you and your financial situation.
Here are the differences between a traditional IRA and a Roth IRA, plus 3 tips to help you choose which account may be best for you today and in the future.
Oh, and by the way: A “traditional IRA” or “trad IRA” is the same thing as an individual retirement account, or IRA. There are a few different types of IRAs, but Traditional and Roth IRAs are most commonly used.
What is a traditional IRA?
In an individual retirement account (IRA)/Traditional IRA, you make contributions up to the annual contribution limit with money that you may be able to deduct on your tax return, and any earnings can potentially grow in the account tax-deferred until you withdraw them in retirement. The idea is that your tax bracket in retirement may be lower than during your working years, so the tax deferral means that the money may be taxed at a lower rate in the future. Keep in mind that taxes and penalties may apply if you take money out before age 59½.
What is a Roth IRA?
With a Roth IRA, you make contributions with money you've already paid taxes on (after-tax contributions), and your money has the potential to grow tax free, with tax-free withdrawals in retirement, provided that you meet requirements for a qualified withdrawal. To be eligible to contribute to a Roth IRA, you have to have earned income that does not exceed the IRS’s Roth IRA income limits.
One of the benefits of a Roth IRA is that you can take out your contributions at any time if you’re in an emergency. While you want to keep your retirement savings long term, Roth IRAs can offer flexibility in a financial emergency. But tax penalties may apply if you take any investment earnings out before age 59½ (or meet one of several exemptions), or if you take contributions out that haven’t satisfied the IRS’s 5-year aging rule.
Traditional or Roth IRA?
If you qualify to contribute to both accounts, here are 3 things you should consider when choosing where to save and invest for retirement.
Tax now or later
Pay taxes now or pay taxes later? That is the question—for most, at least.
The key difference between a traditional and a Roth IRA is taxes. With a traditional IRA, your contributions can be tax deductible—meaning you could reduce your taxable income or tax liability. Though you’ll eventually have to pay Uncle Sam when you withdraw any deductible contributions in retirement.
A Roth IRA is the opposite. Contributions are made with money that has already been taxed (your contributions don't reduce your taxable income), and you generally don't have to pay taxes when you withdraw the money in retirement.
This means that you need to choose between paying taxes now or in retirement. So, you may want to get the tax benefit when you think your tax bracket is going to be the highest. In general:

• If you believe your tax bracket will be significantly higher in retirement than it is now, a Roth account may make sense, because qualified withdrawals are federally tax free.
• If you believe your tax bracket will be significantly lower in retirement than it is now, a traditional account may work better for you, because you will pay a lower tax on your withdrawals. Consult a tax advisor for questions about your specific situation.

Are you a spender or a saver?
Some people spend all their available money, some people tend to save it. That's no judgment against spenders. But how you manage your money can help you choose which type of account may make sense for you.

• Other things being equal, and assuming contributions are of similar size, traditional IRA accounts preserve more money to spend today while Roth accounts tend to provide more money to spend in the future. But remember, if you are over the income limit or are an active participant in a workplace plan, you may not be eligible for tax-deductible contributions in a traditional IRA.
• On the other hand, a contribution to a Roth account reduces the amount of money left in your pocket, because you pay taxes on your contributions up front. If you’re like many people who tend to spend their take-home pay, opting for a Roth and thus having less available to spend might be a good thing when it comes to your retirement savings.
• There’s one more factor to consider: Even if you do hold on to, and then invest, the tax savings from a contribution to a traditional IRA account, where will you be able to invest it? If you end up investing it in a taxable brokerage account, the return you earn on that investment will typically be lower than it would be in a retirement account because of the taxes you’ll have to pay along the way.

Crunch the numbers
Sometimes, it takes a little bit of math. We’ve developed an IRA vs Roth IRA calculator that can help you learn which IRA might be best for you in as little as 3 questions. Plus, this calculator can help you learn how much you can contribute. If you’re ineligible for a Roth IRA, you can consider Roth conversions, but make sure to consult a tax advisor as there can be tax consequences.
Quick tip: Remember that contributions to an IRA are not automatically invested, like those to a 401(k) or 403(b). Learn more about investing your IRA here.

Battle report: R-02
Time: One day after the Galdush battle, day 21 since REC forces crossed to the other side
Report carried out by: Brigadier General Oscar Wayne
Report states: At noon of the 21st day the remains of the enemy seventh army engaged base Galdush. The attack was carried out by air forces, consisting of the enemy's seventh wyvern corp, and ground forces, consisting of the enemy's seventh siege legion. The wyverns came within roughly three miles from the base before the majority was taken out of the sky by AN/TWQ-2 missile systems, the rest either fled or stayed and were taken out via heavy machine gun fire. The siege legion was destroyed sooner by M155A2 self-propelled howitzers. The majority was eliminated, and remnants fled.
Outcome: Victory
REC casualties: None
Enemy casualties: Estimated 4.000 (Not including wyverns and hardware)
Identification sources: Captured general of the seventh army, Drannor Crax; Captured dwarven commander Dunan Oremelt.
(Twenty days after the Galdush battle)
Imperial palace, Elyana
"What is the meaning of this!?", Canus yelled in furious anger as he stood up from his throne.
"Your Majesty, I can explain.", Laeroth said standing in the center of the Grand chamber, surrounded by senators and the Chosen legions, "I was planning on informing you-"
"Inform me of what!? That the invasion force led by general Ylindar was destroyed in less than a day!? That the troops you sent to Galdush to stop the humans were also crushed!? That we lost nearly two hundred thousand forces, including two of our armies and generals, in less than one fucking moon cycle!?".
This was the first time anyone has seen Canus rage out like this. His whole life he was calm and collected, never raising his voice at anyone. Even if he did have an outburst, its magnitude was nowhere near the level of what the Grand chamber's attendants were experiencing at this moment. Laeroth had no words with which to defend himself and lying was beneath. He underestimated the enemy's capabilities. If they could do this, then he shuddered to imagine what they would do if they were given even more time. All he knew for sure was that a direct approach will undoubtedly lead to failure.
"Your Majesty.", Laeroth spoke, "I meant no disrespect. I only assumed that-"
"You assumed!? You do not assume, Laeroth. You determine! You bring solutions and results. In over three hundred cycles you never once assumed anything. What has changed? Are you losing your edge?"
"Your Majes-"
"Perhaps I should put someone else in charge.". These words shook Laeroth to the core. "Someone more youthful. Someone I can fully trust. Someone capable of cleaning this mess. Perhaps Athtar, maybe Reebus or Syndra. Or... maybe that fellow Alpharan."
"No!", Laeroth shouted, his voice booming over the halls, making everyone present twitch. He drew his sword and knelt, "I shall resolve this. I shall not fail you, Your Majesty.". He brought the edge of his sword to his left hand and without hesitation sliced off his smallest finger. Then he placed his sword on the floor and offered Canus his finger. Canus slowly walked over to him and took it.
After observing the finger for several moments, Canus spoke, "Rise.", and so Laeroth did, "This is your final chance. Should you fail me, you will lose more than this finger.". With a bow and a salute, Laeroth exited the chamber. "This meeting is over! Return to your duties!"
With that, the chamber was emptied and only Canus remained with his guard. Sitting on his throne, Canus observed Laeroth's finger. All he could do was hope and pray that Laeroth's determination would prevail.
As Laeroth walked down the halls he patched up his hand with cloth. His first captain walked beside him, "Sir! You must slow down."
"I cannot Helion!", Laeroth shouted, "Every minute we spend bickering is a minute we give to the enemy. Their power, their speed, it is like nothing we faced before."
"Well... What do we do? What can we do?"
"First we need to fortify the North Alston river. Send word to general Lyklor Balphine of the XI and general Reebus Octo of the XII. Tell them to hold the bridges and not let the enemy pass. Since they have powerful cannons, they need to spread their forces out and use long-range catapults. Second, send word to the Meilume nobility and tell them to leave the region. Third, bring me the captive humans as soon as possible. Where are they?"
"About a dozen have been scattered at the Meilume and Kuruk capitals. The rest are on their way to the other cities between Kuruk and Elyana and many will be sent to the mines of the Tubal mountains."
"I want eight captives here as soon as possible."
"Understood sir.". The captain saluted and rushed to his duties, leaving Laeroth who entered his personal chamber and grabbed his flask. After he emptied it he threw it to the corner of the room. Sitting down on his bed he caught his breath and stared at the spirit statues on his shelf and prayed, "Morto, I beg of you. Bring death upon these cursed enemies."
---
(Around the same time)
South village, Yellow forest county, Meilume
Nym will never forget what happened that day. His little crew swore that they would never tell anyone about it. That... man, if it can be called a man, terrified them. When they returned to their parents they lied about how they were running from ferals they saw in the forest while playing. This put the whole village on alert. Of course, it would, a danger of ferals attacking was normal. The whole forest had dens of feral welfen and leanoids, but the county didn't have the means with which to deal with the problem and the empire doesn't see them as a threat overall, so the counties were on their own.
The Yellow forest county had roughly eight thousand people living in it with roughly six hundred militia. It was small compared to some other counties but it held on all things considered. Some people wanted to leave the country as they feared it was becoming too dangerous due to feral activity, but recent events made them choose otherwise. Two massive armies marched near their forest and looking down from the hill the people could see them. The first one marched to the rift to get to the other side and the other after them to assist them. But they were all defeated. This frightened the people of Yellow forest, but they chose to stay, thinking that maybe the enemy won't enter their forest because of the ferals. A long shot, but one they chose to take.
Nym was outside with his friends. The sun was starting to set and they had to return home from mushroom picking. "We never should have gone there.", said Cohnal.
"Stop talking about it.", Nym said, "It's done, stop."
"He has a point, Nym.", Elsha said, "I don't know why that man let us go but... I don't ever want to see him again."
"Same here.", said Meara.
"And we won't have to.", Nym said, "As long as we don't tell anyone anything and we never go to Galdush, we will be fine."
The four of them nodded to that. What happened on that day scared them to the core. But it made them confused more than anything else. The passing imperial soldiers said how they were going to a savage land filled with barbaric monsters. But if that was true, then why did the men on Galdush spare them? Was it because they took no pleasure in killing children? One thing was for sure, they will heed their advice and stay away.
"I think we have enough.", Elsha said.
"Yes.", Hallas said, "We should probably return to the village before ferals show up."
"I don't think they will.", Nym said.
"What do you mean?", Meara asked.
"Haven't you noticed that we haven't seen any ferals in several moon cycles? It's like they ran away."
"That is strange.", Cohnal said, "But either way, we should hurry back."
The five of them started walking back. The forest is quite beautiful in the evening and at night. The reason why it's called Yellow forest is that in the late yellow season and all of the green season, the yellow-backed fireflies and red-headed beetles start flying at night and illuminate the whole forest with yellow and red dots. The county doesn't put up many torches in these times because the people love watching the red and yellow dance of insects. A few beetles have come out of the trees and this told the children they should hurry.
As they ran through the forest, Elsha stopped when she heard rustling in a nearby bush. Her curiosity got the better of her and she walked closer to the bush, despite Nym telling her not to. She walked closer and closer and when she got closer she noticed a pair of green eyes inside the bush. She realized immediately what it was and jumped back just before the creature jumped after her. It was a goblin. Short and bald with a big nose and ugly teeth it wore rags and held a crudely made spear. Elsha was backing away but she slipped and fell on her back. The goblin was about to stab her with his spear, but Nym jumped in and shanked it in the side, piercing its heart. Pulling out the knife he grabbed Elsha and the five of them started running back to the village. As they ran, goblins started jumping out of the bushes and shrubs. Dozens of them. The children could see the gate of the village.
"Open the gate!", Nym yelled as he dragged Elsha, "Goblins! Let us in!"
The guards quickly rushed to open the gate. They opened it just enough so the children could pass. One by one passed and Nym was about to cross but he was grabbed by the goblins. The goblin that grabbed him was taller and bulkier than the rest. He dragged Nym back and left as more goblins showed up. The children cried and the guards quickly closed the gate and climbed on the walls. They saw not dozens, but hundreds of goblins. How could there be so many, they couldn't know and there was no time to find out. The one hundred and fifty militia that were at the village armed themselves and prepared to fight. The goblins threw stones at them but the stone is not as strong as an arrow. The militia opened fire with bows and crossbows, killing dozens of them. The larger goblins threw larger stones and even smaller goblins at the wall. A few made it over and some landed on the militia and started stabbing them. One militia fighter used his sword to slice their heads off and grabbed the crossbow of a fallen fighter and shot the larger goblin in the head, killing him and letting his disgusting, bloated hunk of flesh flop on the ground.
"Aim for the large ones first!", he shouted, "I need spears on the edges, they are climbing! Burn them, they hate fire!". He continued to kill more goblins, slicing the heads of the ones who climbed up on the wall's edges. In front, he could see how a section was overwhelmed as the large goblins threw smaller ones at the militia. He grabbed a nearby shield and charged at them, knocking several down and letting the forces on the ground deal with them. As he looked down he saw the last six large goblins grab a log and he immediately understood their role. "Prepare the torches! Grab cloth!". The fighters did just that and threw the burning cloth and torches at the goblins as they hit the gate with their log.
As the battle went on, the militia killed dozens of goblins with volleys of arrows but more just kept coming. They could see the end though, there were no more large goblins and the small ones had organized a suicide charge to overwhelm the wall, but the fighters kept throwing fire and shooting them with arrows. As this was happening, however, something was happening in the village. The people were all in their homes, but a few were still helping the militia fight as they treated their wounds and brought arrows, food, and boiling water. One of them heard something coming from the abandoned well and moved closer to see. When he got closer he peaked in and a green hand grabbed him as another one stabbed him in the throat. From the good goblins came, several of them, then a few dozen. They went into homes and people started screaming. Elsha was in one of the homes, and her grandmother was laying in the corner when a goblin walked towards her, but Elsha took a knife and stabbed it in the head. From her door, she could see more of them running towards her. She was scared but relieved as more militia came. They were from the western village of the county and had come as soon as they could. The fighters went into the homes and started killing the goblins. Chopping off heads, stabbing hearts and lungs, firing crossbows, burning, the militia used everything.
Eventually, the goblins inside the village were all killed and the fires were put out. The goblins outside the wall were mostly dead but nearly a hundred fled. This was a dark night. The south militia lost nearly a third of its force and dozens of people were killed by the goblins from the well, which was covered up with wooded planks and stone. But the damage to the hearts and minds of the people was greater. Mothers mourned their children and children their fathers. Their greatest fear was the goblins coming back.
(The next day)
Everyone looked to the wall defender, Tulgor, the commander of the south militia. They hoped he would have an answer to all this, and so did he. Some wanted revenge, many asked what to do next. Truth is, he didn't know what to do. Something like this never occurred and no one thought it was possible.
"Tulgor.", spoke an elderly elf, "What do you think we should do?"
"I... I do not know, elder.", Tulgor replied, making everyone around them lower their heads in grief, "We could send fighters down the well and see what is down there. It could be their den and if so they are asleep. But I cannot be certain what we will face. If we get cornered we would die. Besides, we do not have the means with which to destroy the den."
"So all that remains is for us to prepare for the next attack?"
"I fear so. And since we do not know where they will attack next, I suggest we inform the mayor to declare a state of alert county-wide, as to prevent further surprises and death."
"Very well. I will personally go to the central hall and-"
"Tulgor!", shouted a militia fighter, "Tulgor! You have to see this."
Tulgor quickly stood up, "What is it? Have the goblins awoken?"
"No. But... I don't know. You must come, they call for you."
"Call for me? Who? Imperial soldiers?"
"No. They are soldiers, but they are wearing green armor and have boomsticks. They're not dwarves, they are too tall and their skin is paler than theirs is."
This greatly confused Tulgor, "Did they say where they are from?"
"Yes. They are from Galdush."
This statement made his heart freeze and the people around him panicked. The enemy from Galdush came here? Why? Have they come to kill them and take their land? Why here, this is a small county. Swallowing the spit that worked up in his mouth he spoke, "How many?"
"I counted only a dozen. But I think there are more in their armored carriages."
"Assemble fifty of our finest. I will meet them."
---
(Earlier)
Operations base Galdush, morning
It's been a while since any attacks have been launched at them and REC got to work. They improved their base, finishing the machine shop, barracks, airstrip, fortifications, and central command. The base was taking shape of a polygonal fort. The reason is that, historically, these types of fortifications were the best defenses against cannon fire until more accurate and powerful forms of artillery were created. But since the highest level of military technology possessed by the enemy is that of the Napoleonic era, it's not an issue. The other benefit is that polygonal forts are built in a way so that the point which needed to be defended is in the middle. This way the rift is in the center and defended on all sides. As an extra precaution, the rift was surrounded by a steel dome with a garrison defending it.
After the full thirty thousand troops made it to the other side of the rift, a few reforms were made. Firstly, all equipment that required a satellite link was not to be used as they had no satellites here. Instead, they used drones until a proper system can be emplaced. Secondly, a squad of four distinct tribals will be accompanying all Rift groups, or RGs, in order to spread the word to the other tribals of North Altia in hopes of bringing more people to the US's side and also showing them why they are not monsters.
There were currently five RGs and each was given an assignment. They were to go to various locations in Meilume and do reconnaissance as well as gain contact with locals and find out more about the imperial government. Each RG was a platoon of thirty-eight rangers from the 75th Ranger regiment led by a first lieutenant and was equipped with standard hardware. Since the end of the Great crisis, Russia and the US have been working on the 'Warrior' project in order to create better gear for soldiers. The result was a helmet, body armor, a one-piece coverall, hearing protection; protective glasses; a protective set for knees and elbows; new grenade launchers, submachine guns, assault rifles, sniper rifles, ammunition, a combat knife, as well as 24/7 reconnaissance means, a day and night sighting system, a small-size binocular, optical and thermal weapon sights, etc. As well as these, the system comprises a universal shelter, a multifunctional knife, a signal lamp, a watch, winter and summer two-side camouflage sets, an autonomous heat source, a backpack, an individual water filter, a small entrenching tool, breath protection devices, means of radiological and chemical control, a medical kit, and filtering clothes. As for vehicles, each RG has two JLTV3s, two International MaxxPros, and one LAV-40, all armed and ready.
With their assignments given, the rangers got to work. RG-2, led by lieutenant Andrea Williams, was to track down the elven children Spearteam found snooping. The group tracked them down to a nearby place designated Yellow forest. They took a path through the forest and hoped to run into their village. On the way, they admired the environment. The green trees, the clear blue sky, and the animals looked like the ones back on Earth, just with a few distinct features. Like how rabbits have longer legs, foxes have brighter eyes, some even have two tails. Everything was truly fascinating.
"Man this place is beautiful.", said sergeant David Hall, "It's like driving through a national park."
"You said it, Dave.", said sergeant Greg Nivera, "What do you think we'll find here?"
"Man, I'm hoping for some griffons or something."
"Griffons are only in the north.", said Xod, the leanoid, "If we ever get to the dwarven kingdoms we might find one."
"That's a bummer.", Greg said.
"Bummer?", asked Zog, the welfen.
"It means it's a bad thing.", David said.
"Why is that a bad thing?"
"Because I really wanted to see one!", Greg said.
"Quiet.", said Andrea over the comms, "You forgot to turn off the radio."
"Sorry ma'am.", said Greg as he turned the radio off.
"Boys.", said Andrea in the lead JLTV, "Let's find these kids."
"I just hope we don't scare them.", said sergeant Sophia Adams, "I'd hate to make a bad first impression."
"These people live in the Yellow forest.", said Madia the lepian, "It's likely that they know about the Galdush battle and they consider you as an enemy. I wouldn't expect them to greet you with 'open arms' as you say it."
"I don't expect that either.", said Andrea, "But that's why we're here. We have to show them that they don't have to fear us. "
Ksee, the feelian, scoffed at that, "You should use your cannons and destroy them. It's what they deserve anyway."
"We won't be the monsters they say we are. There can be another way. Besides, it's the army and the emperor along with the other stuck-up nobility that's the problem. I'm not gonna kill farmers 'cause a bureucrat attacked me."
Ksee thought about that. She saw what the Americans were capable of, and yet she couldn't understand why they don't just force the elves into submission. As they drove through the forest, they came across another path that led deeper into the woods. The tracker led them there and so they followed it. It was amazing how many things the human soldiers were capable of doing, unlike the elves who only knew how to kill in several different ways. The vehicles moved through the woods and reached a wooden wall about roughly twenty feet tall that looked like it saw action recently. They followed the tracker and found it on the ground in front of the gate.
'What happened here?', Andrea thought as she picked up the tracker.
"Hold it!", shouted someone from the wall. It was an elf and around him about twenty more with bows and crossbows pointed at Andrea, "Who are you?"
Andrea calmly stepped forward, "I am lieutenant Andrea Williams of Rift group 2 from the Rift Expeditionary Corp!". This seemed to confuse them.
"Where are you from?", he asked.
"Galdush."
This made them tense up. They seemed angered. "You are the enemy! Why have you come?!". The rangers aimed their guns at them but Andrea waved for them to calm down.
"We are here to speak with your leader. We only want to make peaceful relations."
"You lie! The imperial army told us that they were heading to Galdush to face the enemy that has come to invade our lands! Thousands went and only hundreds returned! That was your doing!"
"Those soldiers attacked us first. They sent their army through the rift and killed thousands of innocent people. We are here to peacefully solve any and all problems with the empire, but we need your help."
"Why should I trust you?"
In response, Andrea gave her gun to Greg, took off her helmet, and widened her arms, "I mean you no harm!". After some hesitation, one of the elves climbed down from the wall.
"Wait there!".
So the team waited. Some were skeptical about this but did nothing. David walked up to Andrea, "Are you sure about this lieutenant? You really think they're gonna even consider talking to us?"
"All I know is they could've shot us on sight. Do you want to kill hundreds of people today, sergeant?". In that moment, the gate opened and an elf followed by fifty more stepped out. The fifty made a defensive line of shields, which tensed up the rangers.
"No, but if this keeps up I might have to.", David said.
The leading elf stepped forward, "I am Tulgor Salvin, commander of the south militia."
Andrea stepped forward, "I am lieutenant Andrea Williams, commander of RG-2 of the Rift Expeditionary group."
"Why have you come, Lieutenant Andrea Williams?"
"As I stated before, we are here to make peaceful relations with the elven people. We mean you no harm."
"You misunderstood my question. Why are you here, specifically?"
"We are here because we want to prove to you that we are not monsters and savages that the empire claims us to be. We only desire peace."
"You keep saying that word. Peace. And yet you kill dozens of thousands if not hundreds of thousands of soldiers."
"Those soldiers attacked us first. You can't blame us for defending ourselves."
"True. Still, how do I know you won't stab us in the back? I see the tribals behind you. You make them fight for you, so how do I know you will not enslave us as well."
"We are not slaves!", Xod shouted, making the fighters twitch, "We chose to fight alongside these humans because we are tired of the empire enslaving and killing us! We fight with them because they promised us freedom! With them, not for them!"
This made Tulgor raise an eyebrow, "Is that really true?"
"Yes.", Andrea said, "We want to end slavery and show you that there is a better way. So if you want to fight them, you'll have to fight us. And I assure you, it will be bloody.". The fighters and rangers tensed up, ready for a fight. But Tulgor laughed.
"Never before have I met a woman with such ferociousness and authority.", he said, "You have my respect. However, if you want my trust, you must offer me more than words."
"And what is it that you want?"
Tulgor thought for a while before answering, "There is a certain goblin problem we are facing."
"Goblin problem?"
"Last night, a horde of goblins attacked us and I lost many fighters. I sense that they will come back but I cannot search for them and leave the village undefended."
"Interesting. Do you have any leads? Or a hunch as to where they are?"
"They came from the forest but it stretches for many leagues. They did however come from an abandoned well."
This caught Andrea's attention, "Very well. But my soldiers will have to enter your village."
"I shall allow half of your men and two carriages."
"Alright.", she turned to the group, "Hall, Adams, bring half the group, one JLTV3, and one MRAP. Madia, Ksee, you're coming too, the rest stay here."
The group organized and entered the village. All the people stared at them and their vehicles, like something otherworldly, which they technically were. They came to the abandoned well and Andrea gave the order to prepare the RC drone and the flyer. The rangers removed the wood and stone from the well and started lowering the drone.
"What is that?", Tulgor asked.
"It's a device we can use to see what's inside the well without going in there.", Andrea answered, "And that one can fly."
"Amazing. How?"
"A long story. I might show you sometime."
The drone was lowered to the bottom and a private drove it. He had to turn on night vision to see. "It looks like a tunnel.", he said, "They probably dug their way in there. You got anything?"
"Nothing yet.", said the other private, "Hold on. I think I see a cave. Yeah, definitely. The entrance is above ground level."
"Goblins are night dwellers.", Tulgor said, "They sleep during the day and hate fire. A cave is where they prefer to live. But to think they would dig their way to our well. I knew they were on a tribal level but this."
"Don't compare us to those monsters, elf.", said Madia.
"Why? They also kidnap people and force-mate with them."
"We only do it when we need to!"
"Calm down!", shouted Andrea, "We had an agreement."
"Ma'am, come look at this.", said a private, and Andrea, Tulgor, and Sophia gathered, "I see dozens of them, sleeping, maybe more further out. And here. It's a boy."
"That is the boy they took last night.", Tulgor said, "He still lives."
"Someone has to go down there and get him.", Andrea said, "Ksee?"
"Why me?", Ksee asked.
"You are the most flexible one. Plus, that's an order."
Ksee groaned but accepted. The private pulled the drone back and tied the rope to her. She was lowered down and then crawled through the tunnel, ignoring the stench on the way. Finally, she came to the cave and looked around, her cat eyes allowing her to see clearly. She saw the boy, who was a little battered but breathing and alive. She slowly grabbed him under the arms but he woke up and started freaking out. This woke up a few goblins and Ksee grabbed the boy and ran back, quickly going back through the tunnel.
She tied the rope around him, "Pull him up!". As they pulled the boy up she could see the goblins approaching, "They're coming!"
"Take this!", Andrea shouted, throwing a frag grenade at her.
"What is it?", Ksee asked.
"Just pull the ring, throw it, and then climb!"
Ksee did just that. After she pulled the pin she threw it at the approaching goblins who grabbed it out of curiosity. A curiosity that would have them killed as the grenade exploded, killing several goblins and blocking the path to Ksee. After Ksee and the boy climbed out, the soldiers rejoiced.
"Please don't make me do that again.", Ksee said.
Andrea chuckled, "No promises."
Ksee saw the boy run to his mother and friends, who cried tears of joy. This made her smile. Tulgor walked over to her and slightly bowed, "Thank you for saving one of my own."
"Don't mention it.", Ksee said, "It was a piece of cake."
Tulgor was confused by that statement, "Cake? There is no cake here."
Ksee laughed a little, "Don't worry about it. The humans taught me, I was a little confused myself."
Greg walked over as he put away his radio, "Ok, it's done. I gave the location to command, they're sending a platoon with flamethrowers to deal with the cave."
"How-", Tulgor began to ask.
"Another device.", Greg said, "We have a lot of them."
Tulgor chuckled, "I see. Thank you, humans. I suppose we can trust you after all. Come, let me introduce you to the elder."
End of chapter 7
​
---
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Some of these are really common, some controversial, and some you've probably never seen a discussion about (。・ω・。)
I actually like Sky. Ofc I don't I agree with everything he did, but I still think he's a good character
Fate's concept is pretty cool, it just wasn't executed very well
Bloom is a great character. If she wasn't the mc then people wouldn't be so hard on her
All of the Winx Club dolls that were made are stunning, and that's including old Witty!!!
Timmy is really underrated, he's so sweet.
Season 8's artstyle isn't as bad as people say it is, it could have been really nice with a few tweaks (mainly fixing the White-washing and giving them more distinct Faces)
Sky didn't cheat
The Pixies were kinda overused, but I still really like them 🩷
Musa and Riven's relationship was really interesting, watching them fight and get back together was captivating. As toxic as that may be 🤷‍♀️ 😂
Winx Club's CGI for the movies is beautiful. I lowkey like their designs in 3D better than 2D
I am cautiously excited for the new reboot
I think Winx Club should end soon, as much as I love this franchise; it's getting stale and I don't think there is much else they can do with these girls.
The Trix were overused imo, especially in season 2. They didn't need to get involved with Lord Darkar

A screw top corona. Not my first choice, but handed to me cold, so I wasn’t going to decline. An apartment party is not somewhere that I ventured too often, but I had just gotten back in town after a 4-month bender abroad, an annoying sentence, I know. Being apart from my friends, I was willing to oblige to their desired evening of fun. Drinking was not atop my priority list, but I was happy to be back with the crew.
It was summer in a sleepy college town. Not a lot to do and not a lot of places to find trouble, so to the apartment party we went, my half empty corona in hand.
Peter and I had met on Halloween 6 months prior to this evening. There was an instant connection. I have never cry laughed more or felt more myself than when I’m with him. Everyone loved Peter. What’s not to love? He made everyone feel like a friend, funny and witty, welcoming, and kind. Once I got to know him on a deeper level, I quickly realized that there was a sad part of him, and I think that is why we connected so well. We were the life of the party, but sad inside to no one’s wiser. We never talked about it, but I know one another’s company made us both feel at home. I quickly knew that I wanted this friendship to last forever. A week after we met, I knew I would have to let him know that I was not romantically interested in him so we could get on with being friends. At 22, a boy doesn’t want to hear that. Now, some 10 years later, he is thankful for the decision I made for us all those years ago. My older brother, my safe space.
Peter liked to party. It was not odd to go to a party with one another and end the night, separated (and by separated, I mean, Peter getting too drunk and leaving a party with out telling anyone or getting kicked out of a bar). We always found our way back to each other the next morning. Breakfast and a gossip session over the events of the night before.
You can hear the music and the beer pong from the ground floor. Peter and I enter the buzzing apartment. I immediately see an old friend that I have not seen since I’ve returned. I am elated. I run over to Thomas and smoother him in the biggest hug imaginable. His face lights up, shocked to see me. We hold up in a corner, laughing and swapping stories from the semester. Thomas and I have had every single class together since freshman year. Our classroom friendship, turned study buddies, turned into a real-life friendship outside of the hallways and the late-night papers. One of the most genuine people I had during college. I was so happy to be reunited. We had so much to catch up on.
Thomas was shy. He never had a ton to say, which is why we got along so well, I can’t shut up, and he’s a great listener. I think he liked how I just forced my friendship onto him, he didn’t really have a say in the matter. We were spending so much of our academic hours together, which made me want to be friends all of the time. He didn’t seem opposed, and we’ve been friends ever since. The extrovert adopts the introvert, a true match made.
I feel a tap on my shoulder. It’s a familiar face from freshman year. Matt. He was friends with some of my older friends. Nice guy, weird he was at this party. Hasn’t he graduated? I thought to myself.
“Sadie, how to hell are you girl”? he screamed into my ear as he embraced me. Matt was an enthusiastic guy. Happy about everything, until he got too drunk, and enthusiasm turned into extremely annoying, very quickly. We exchanged small talk, until we were approached by another figure.
“Chad, what the fuck is up man, come here. Do you know Sadie? Greatest girl on earth, you have to meet her”?! Matt yelled as he embraced Chad. I knew Chad. He had messaged me while I was away for the semester. A random message, considering I had been at my university for 3.5 years and never heard of him until his Instagram DM. I chalked it up to him hearing about my recent break up. It’s a small town, the dating pool is subpar, and we ran in different circles. I put two and two together, Thomas and Matt are in the same frat, and I’m now learning that that is how Chad fits into this circle. We spoke a couple times while I was away, nothing serious, and left it at “see ya around”. I guess “around” was happening right now.
“I am hopping to get to know her a lot more” Chad smirked. Matt turned to me and continued to tell me about awesome Chas is and how crazy it was that our paths have never crossed.
Everyone knew the answer to that. I had dated the same guy all of college, and up until a few months ago, I didn’t know who the cute, single guys were on campus. I quickly learned that Chad, was one of them. Maybe this was my chance to have a little fun as I entered my senior year. I was going to have an easy year and after a very bad break up, no strings attached fun was exactly what I needed.
“Let me get you a drink” Chad suggested. That’s right, my corona. I had finished it on the ride over here and was too busy talking with Thomas to get another. Chad appeared with a red solo cup of what he called “the house drink”. I took the half-filled cup and took a sip. It tasted like every other party juice that college kids make. Likely an entire bottle of cheap brunettes’ vodka and whatever juice they had in the fridge. I now find myself in another corner, completely enchanted with Chad.
I don’t know how much time has passed; I tell him I need to use the restroom. I push past the crowd of strangers and dodge flying ping pong balls. I find myself in a bathroom. I look at myself in the mirror. Am I having a good time? I ask myself with a smile. It’s been almost 4 years of college and the bad times have unfortunately clouded my memories of the fun times. At 21 years old, I find myself struggling with dark, overwhelming emotions that I have absolutely no idea how to navigate. It’s refreshing to be sober and having fun, especially with a cute boy. I kind of want to go home with Chad? If that’s what this leads to, I think as I wash my hands and reapply my lip gloss. He’s a 22 year old guy, of course he wants me to come home with him. I’ve never done that before. Gone home with someone I barley know? It’s college, I’m single, this is exactly what I can and want to do I think to myself as I place the lip gloss back into my bag.
Anyway, I need to get back out there. I toss the gross rag back onto the counter. Give my hair a fluff and open the door. Thomas is standing right outside the door as I open it. “Stop talking to him” he whispers to me. “What”? I screamed over the blaring music. Thomas mumbles when he’s been drinking so I have no idea what he’s getting on about. “That guy is bad news, just warning you” he says looking at me with the coldest stare he’s ever given. Thomas has never had an opinion on my dating or social life, ever. That’s the best thing about our friendship. It’s just a fun, healthy, no bad energy kind of flow. We don’t talk boys or girls and we can just be ourselves with each other. Hearing him say something about Chad is odd. “He’s nice, we’re just talking” I assure him and prance back to my corner.
I always wonder how different my life would be if Thomas was a girl. If a girlfriend told me to be worried about a guy and not talk to them, I would listen. I would have never gone back over to that guy. I trust my girlfriends with my life. In that moment, I thought Thomas was drunk and crushing on me and didn’t like seeing me with a guy that he deemed to be a “douche bag”. I always wonder if Matt didn’t see me that night, would Chad have even approached us talking. I always wonder if Peter didn’t want to go out that night, I would have never ended up in the apartment. I always wonder if I didn’t take a drink of that juice and vodka, the events of that night would have played out differently. I can’t ask myself those questions these days. I don’t handle “what ifs” very well.
I get back to my corner. I’m feeling flushed. It’s probably the juice in the drink, I’ve never liked a sweet drink. Makes my head hurt. Chad is almost as charming as I think I am. My charm comes in the form of sarcasm and dancing around the line of just being mean. Boys love that.
“I’m having a great time, I don’t even care that we’re at this party, do you want to maybe come back to my place and keep talking? I just live down the street” Chad leans into me closer as he asks with the most soft but confident tone. I don’t even think before I answer, an excited “Yes” slips from my glossed lips.
“My roommate is here actually; he doesn’t drink so he can drive us”. His roommate appears out of thin air, like he was a fly on the wall, waiting for his cue. It's like he had it planned.
I don’t tell Peter and Thomas I’m leaving. The last thing I want to hear from them is all the reasons I shouldn’t. I scan the room; Peter isn’t even in the apartment. Classic. Thomas must be in the room I left him in, I don’t say bye. I take Chad’s hand and we’re getting in his roommates’ car. He sits in the back with me, even though there isn’t a 4th person coming with us. I think it’s odd, making your roommate be your driver? I don’t think about it again. I’m dizzy. It’s probably the car, I do get car sick.
The roommate jumps out of the car before the head lights even turn off and heads inside, it’s like he was trying to run away from us. Again, odd. Maybe he’s just an awkward guy. We get up to his second-floor apartment. It’s a typical boy apartment. The TV to couch ratio is off and there are empty whiskey bottles lining the top of the kitchen counters. I roll my eyes.
Why am I here? My heart is racing out of my chest. I feel like I could run a marathon but, I can barely keep my eyes open. I’ve never felt like this before. I don’t even remember the car ride over here? Which is strange, considering I had 1 corona 2 hours ago and half a class of juicy vodka over the last hour. I keep doing “drink math” in head as it spins in circles. Trying to understand why this blanket of fog and discomfit comes over so quickly. I don’t want to get sick, how embarrassing would that be? Especially in front of this cute guy that I’ve just met.
He walks me into his room. We’re kissing. That’s fine. I sit down on the bed, his palms grabbing either side of my face. I’m good with that. I pull back, “I don’t want to have sex” I said nervously. I’m up front, I wanted him to know that that’s not why I came back here. I just wanted to see how things were, just the two of us. “Then we don’t have to” he smiled as he went back to kissing me.
Darkness. I can’t see anything. I know things are happening, I couldn’t tell you exactly what. Are my eyes even open? I’m trying to open them. I’m trying to talk. I can’t hear myself. It’s like all motor functions just slipped away without me knowing. Like I’m a baby that wants to communicate but can only make a few sounds. I can’t get my point across. It’s extremely frustrating. I can’t even tell if I can move my arms. Panic sets in. I hear an exhausted “NO” escape my lips. I think? I hope.
Darkness. I don’t know how much time has passed. Am I coming in and out of consciousness? I don’t even know what that feeling is like, I’ve never experienced what’s happening to me before. I’m in a bathroom? Why? I look up and see myself in the mirror. I’m naked. I tilt my head up a little further and I see him, behind me, naked as well.
He’s Inside of me. I realize what is happening.
Why are we in the bathroom? Did you need to watch me in the mirror? Did I run in here and you followed me to continue what you had started in the darkness.
“NO, get off me” finally. I heard that. It was loud. Good. I run back into the room. Why are my clothes off? Where is my purse? God why do I always wear so much jewelry, it’s everywhere. I can buy new stuff. No, this is new stuff, get it off the floor. I toss myself together, shoes and bag in hand. I run.
Darkness.
I’m on the phone.
Darkness.
Now, I’m in a car.
Darkness.
Now, I’m swallowing a pill, eating a taco, drinking water out of a glass, and laying in Monica’s bed. She seems very stressed out. How did I get here? I asked myself as I examine my familiar surroundings.
The next morning, we treated it like a normal morning.
Monica was my best friend. Looking back at our friendship, she was more like a mother. A mother with attachment issues. She was in and out of relationships or flings, always obsessing over the ex she dumped. She was an only child, selfishness came natural to her. She was only a couple years older than me. I thought she hung the moon. I had never had a friendship like this before. We were rarely apart. After my break up, I basically lived with Monica. I would have done anything for her, and to be honest, at that moment in time, she would have done anything for me. it’s the only time I had ever felt like she truly cared about me.
Peter and Jake met Monica and I at breakfast. Over the past 6 months, the 4 of us did everything together. We were the life of every party. They were the ying to our yang. This breakfast however, was not like our normal Sunday hungover gossip sessions.
“Are you going to tell them or should I”? Monica blurted out once we all got our drinks. I felt the redness flush over my cheeks. I couldn’t say that word. I couldn’t tell Peter what happened. I couldn’t look him in the eyes. I didn’t even want to tell Monica what happened. She told me she found me in a parking lot of an apartment building that we had never even been to before. She knew. I didn’t have to say anything. I wanted it to vanish out of my memory. I could barley remember anything so if I continued to push it out of my brain, it would be gone like a dream sooner rather than later.
I don’t remember the rest of that breakfast. I don’t remember the rest of that summer. If we’re being honest, looking back, I don’t remember most of college. It’s like that one night triggered something so dark inside of me that it erased everything from my memory. They call it trauma in therapy, but I call it protection.
Of course, I remember things here and there. Funny stories, my walks to class. But conversations, nights out with friends, the day-to-day life of what was supposed to be the greatest 4 years of your life was magically gone.
Not only did it trigger something dark inside of me, but it altered every cell in my body. The extrovert became an introvert. I couldn’t speak with a man with out a chip on my shoulder. I was moody and tired and completely unamused with everything. It’s like a was making poor decisions in my life on purpose because I was addicted to the pain and suffering. Sadness and shame were my new normal. I didn’t want to be happy, that felt like way too much work. I was good at being miserable.
I stayed like this for almost 3 years. I graduated, moved to a new city, made new friends, continued to make awful choices, got into another toxic relationship that wasn’t even a relationship and pushed away a lot of people. Monica and I had our inevitable break up. Thomas was still back in our college town, I didn’t see him often. Peter moved to the west coast the month before I moved to the east coast. An entire country apart. He still came to visit me. He checked on me. We missed each other so much, I know it hurt us both, but we would never tell each other. A simple “miss you” even though I knew it was more than that. I needed him. I needed someone there that loved me like I used to love myself.

For reference, this is in Scotland.
My grandmother received a strongly worded letter today from a local solicitor, demanding that she allow her neighbour access through her ground via an old "common grazing" road, which as has already been established years prior he has no right of access. He has tried this for years with no success. She was sent a copy of his foundation plan, dating from the 1950's and it is a poor, vague and dark copy at best making it hard to see details accurately, along with a copy of her much more recent and accurate title deeds, clearly showing the land belongs to her and that he has no access.
The problem is, the solicitor that took this on is the solicitor that keeps her title deeds and has her will. The solicitor has given us advice regarding her title deeds prior to this.
Does this constitute a conflic of interest? We were informally told by another local solicitor that it may, just wanted the opinion of others.

L and I have been coworkers since October of 2021. I always found him very attractive. I maybe spoke two words to him until December, then we quickly became very close. We’d go to the movies, get boba, just hang out. It was nice. Everyone at work would even tease us saying we were dating. We both denied it. We went to a park and walked around before seeing fireworks on the Fourth of July. There was a hot air balloon I would use as an excuse to look at you instead of the fireworks.
We went to the beach together for a few days. It was amazing. I wanted to capture that moment in time forever. L and I would walk the beach every morning as the sun rose. While we were there some hotel attendant hit on me and I didn’t realize until you told me. Then you hyped her up and so I talked to her. We went out for lunch it was fine, but I didn’t want to be with her.
Then we came back home and I don’t even remember if it was a full week later but G (23f) texted him. G and L went on a few dates back in November of 2021. He had mentioned her a few times so I was aware he liked her so I tried to do my best to be a supportive friend. I think I did alright until I spent time as a third wheel. I got jealous and began drinking. Going a month barely eating food and having 6-12 drinks a day is not at all healthy. Mentally and physically I was not doing well so my therapist convinced me I finally needed to tel L how I felt.
At this point it’s early February 2023, I tell him we need to stop making sexual jokes with each other. Which L agreed with, but he wanted the full truth. So I told L I liked him and that I have for a while. We saw each other a couple days later and he told me that he liked me as well. Things picked up we hung out we hooked up. Not in the way I would have wanted it to go. I think we both felt guilty. L more so than me since he said we should probably end things. (At the time I was planning on going back to college.) I thought about it and we talked it through. I told him I just wanted him to be happy and he seemed so happy with me. He was saying how he didn’t even want to talk to his girlfriend anymore.
Then the second hook up. This was bad for both of us I think. I was not in the right mindset and did some stuff I normally wouldn’t have and just felt over all gross afterwards. What made it even worse though was how distant L was right after. L wasn’t sure if he was gay. That’s okay. I want to be there to support him. He starts getting touchy and flirty again a few days later. I ask him if he’s okay and he’s said he worked everything out. A couple weeks later and we’re at last Thursday, March 23rd we go to my therapist. You tell me these were just old feelings that bubbled up and that you care about me as a friend.
Accepting that I try to remain platonic with him. He’s continued to be flirty and touchy even after me telling him to stop. It gets to the point I snap and tell him to stop touching me and he gets the hint. I apologize later and tell him that if I need to move on I can’t have him touching me since it’s something I exclusively feel comfortable with a romantic partner doing. I ask him how he’s doing and tells me he almost broke up with his girlfriend. I asked why but all he said was he almost told her what happened.
I’m terrible with social cues so I’m not sure if he still wants to be with me or not. I’m not sure if he’s just guilty. Is it a mix of the two?
TDLR: L and I flirted for over a year. L got a girlfriend but flirting between us didn’t stop. Due to jealousy I tell him I like him (honestly not trying to be malicious or manipulative just had to tell him due to alcoholism). We hooked up twice. He said he only cares about me as a friend but within the week he’s continued flirting with me. He almost broke up with girlfriend as well.

I dont think im off the mark to say most witnesses and exwitnesses do not know this but....that old library in the hall is worth a fortune. No joke. Literally thousands of dollars. Trust me, i know. Here is my comment. Check this out:
Put aside the actual religiosity of it all for a moment. Think of all the publications theyve put out there since the early 1900s. Its a lot. Now think of how much of that went straight into the trash. How many of the rest got studied up and written all over. Think about how they always say 'heres new light' and some book comes out to replace an old one like the bible itself, the song books, the theocratic ministry school books, etc...
The old publications go out of print. Often, theres stuff in those old books they dont want you to see any more. More books go by the way side as the new books get produced and used and so on. People move over decades and often, beat up old study copies end up lost in the shuffle or mercifully, quietly thrown out.
People DO collect the books though. Most long standing older witnesses will have at least a shelf or two dedicated to the publications they used and have read. At my parents house, they have bound volumes. Lots of them. The CDs dont have every publication and every year they had less and less available by CD. Now, i dont know whats on JW.borg at all but ill bet theres a good deal missing from their actual written past or reworded. You may find, if you were ever inclined to look, that kingdom halls sometimes had or still have small collections of books that may have been donated to them by older witnesses or their relatives when they die. Assembly halls also make displays of old literature too.
Heres the thing, i dont know about a new witness today and how they feel but a general feeling back in the day about the publications was that they are a tool for us to use....until they become something of a treasure from the past, part of memories, a sacred thing of respect, dare i say, idols...almost. If you are a witness, you feel bad throwing them away as you may an old watchtower (some cant throw those out either). What often happens is a witness will just quietly end up throwing away excess books and study copies but save one for their collection.
You may also have the rare occasion of someone whos parents were witnesses and now theyve gotta throw out their stuff, to these kids, those old publications are worse than worthless and theyd simply throw them all out in disgust or maybe even burn them for a little bit of therapy.
But....how many people who simply have these books would ever assume they had any value as a collectable? No jw thinks this way.
Now imagine that you are not a witness but you -for some reason- want to simply collect the publications produced by the International bible students association and later watchtower bible and tract society. How do you do it? Where do you find them? Who has any anywhere? Will they give them to you? Will they sell them to you? No.
The publications you see there on amazon is nothing compared to what is out there and what people are looking for. Theres publications you may not have ever heard of like the so called "rainbow books" or the finished mystery volumes, the messenger of laodecia(a pamphlet given out at the funeral of charles taze russell), pastor russell says, bound volumes of zions watchtower from the late 1800s, bound volumes of the predecessors of the Awake magazine....there are some extremely rare jdub books out there.
But it isnt just that. Theres the actual magazines, a century of brochures, the outdated blood cards, testimony cards, old tracts, kingdom news letters, letters written to congregations from the society that bare their letter head, stationary, old time sheets, invitations to talks and memorials and assembly/convention programs. Aaaall this is basically litter, none of it was meant to be kept the way books are. Even blood cards and contracts are supposed to be renewed. Its all desposable. To find these are often even more rare than getting your hands on old publications like the millennial dawn, for instance.
Witnesses have always been -ruiners of the earth- in my opinion, given the massive amount of trees theyve been responsible for churning into paper for like 140 years. The huge carbon footprint theyve made with all the electricity they consumed producing all of this garbage, all the cars driving people back and forth to halls and out into the field, all the resources for supplies to build kingdom halls and assembly halls and all the trash and consumerism produced in the name of jehovah, this all combined makes them just as much ruiners of the earth as anyone they could point their finger at.
But again, all of that garbage from the past including bookmarks, calendars, banners, lapel pins, vinyl records, binders to hold actual watchtower issues into a bound volume, so many things that once was is now simply rare collectables. And the rarer it is, the more its worth.
I hope this was helpful.
P.S. I have heard recently that the society is asking halls to send their rare publications to them for 'safe keeping'. I dont know how true that is but i personally think its so they can sell off the rare ones themselves to help pay off lawsuits.